-----
SAME TIME, SAME PLACE -----
Season 7, Episode 3
Giles: Last time on--
Willow: I know, I know. My self-doubt, Anya's messed up vengance,
Spike barbecue. Let's move on.
Giles: *glares* It's cooler than it seems, this 'previously on'
recap... thing.
Willow: Cooler, but not difficult in any way, shape, or---
Giles: Shouldn't you be on that plane to America right about now?
Willow: Meh.
Willow: Whoop. Nobody here! Guess I'll just turn right around and
go bother "cool" recap man again.
Giles: (disembodied voice) Oh no you don't! You've crossed the
ocean now and are therefor, no longer my problem.
Willow: But I---
Giles: Nope. Not mine, no sir.
WIllow: Baby.
Buffy: Hmmm. No Willow. Time to turn around and go bother Giles
again while simultaneously running up the long distance bill.
Giles: (disembodied still) Who declared it "Pester Rupert
the Ex-Watcher Day"? WHO??!!
Anya: Lalalala... beautiful day. Nice, clear blue sky....
Willow: ANYA! You're the first friend I've seen all day!
Anya: ... turning around and heading back in the direction I
came.
Willow: Noooo... I don't feel like I'm being avoided.
Gnarl Demon: I'll kill you, mortal fleshy-man!
Guy: The Slayer will know it's you! She'll kill you!
Gnarl: Just so happens that the happy flaying witch is back in
town. Easy scapegoat, ergo--- *SNARL, SCRATCH, CHEW*
Skinless Guy: Crapper.
Xander: I declare this the "Dead Willow-Victim at the
Construction Site" holiday.
Buffy: Ooo! What do we do on that day? Exchange gifts? Bake
cookies? I like cook---
Xander: I'd say we clean up said Willow victim....
'Course, if you still feel hungry after that, I suppose cookies
could--
Buffy: Ugh. Nevermind.
Spike: Self help exercise time. I am not crazy. I am merely---
Willow: Hi Spike. Have you seen the others?
Buffy: Hi Spike. Have you seen Willow?
(they walk right through each other)
Spike: --- stark raving mad.
Willow: Hi. Aparently, you're the only one I'm visible to. Wanna
do a demon-locating spell with me?
Anya: Uh, okay. (pause) Wait... was that a come-on?
Dawn: (surfing the web) Hmm. AHA! Hannibal-like demon at 12:00!
Xander: But it's only 8:34?
Dawn: (stops. stares.) Nice to know I'm not the biggest dork on
the show.
Dawn: We can follow Spike to the fires from whence the ring was
forged! There we will defeat the demon and throw---
Buffy: Ooookay. I'm thinking I need to get out to the movies a
>>>lot<<< more often. Pop culture references
are supposed to be MY thing.
Xander: Well, that was only semi witty.
Dawn: Thank you........... SEMI??
Gnarl: And so the epic battle begins.
Buffy: Ki-yah! *high kick*
Gnarl: *SLASH*
Dawn: Yeeeeouch!
Xander: Uhhhh... gotta go!
Gnarl: Gee. That was.... fast. *sigh* I wonder if Peter Jackson
could use an extra monster-guy?
Willow: NOOOO! Don't leave me all alone with this bad horror
movie thing!!
Gnarl: Hmm. I should be insulted by that, but I'm hungry so... oh
well. Heeeee heeeee!! Eat the pretty witch!
Buffy: Dawn's paralyzed!!!
Anya: But moveable, sorta. You know, I bet Willow would love
action-figure Dawn.
Xander: Ha. Who's the biggest dork on the show now,
Gumbie?
Dawn: *GLARE*
Buffy: Heh. It is kinda... Willow?? You saw Willow??!
Anya: Yep. She's here. (all stare at her) I... didn't mention
this sooner?
Xander: You know, if Willow is invisible, she could be doing all
sorts of cool stuff. Like making faces at people, or--
Buffy: Being slashed to ribbons and eaten because we locked her
in that cave!
Xander: Yeah! Eeerrr, no. Errr... gross. And a hearty
"ooops" on that last one.
Buffy: Die, you nasty demon. Diediediediediediedie!!!
Willow: (lips barely moving) Though I can't see what's going on
or even, you know, move... I'm guessing that demon's
toast.
Xander: Ha! We win! Uhm... where's Anya?
(meanwhile back at the ranch.... errrr.... Summer's house)
Dawn: (standing regally at the front door, one arm straight out,
other hand on hip) *CRASH*
Anya: Crap! Spell's been broken.
Dawn: What? Who's side are you on?
Anya: I mean: "Yay! We win!" (aside) But Buffy just
ruined a perfectly good Argonath door statue.
The little Grr! Argh! demon chases a
shiny golden ring across the screen.