Simply Sexy Fun with Billy Zane

Hello, allow me to introduce myself. I am Billy Zane, and I'm very sad because nobody gives me the respect that I deserve...

See, all people remember about me is my role in Titanic. Yeah, I played a jerk. But he was a HOT jerk! Come on, how can you look at me and not find me at all sexually appealing?

See, I knew you couldn't resist...

At least I was much better looking than Leonardo Dicaprio. Look at him, he wasn't even cute. And plus he was poor! And he died at the end so that stupid slut left me for nothing...

Oh, but I'm getting sidetracked aren't I..

Another reason why I get no respect... I used to have long flowing locks of hair...

But then stupid, stupid me, I shaved it all off...

See, this is me preparing my head with the shaving cream. Mmmmmmm, cream.

I personally think I look much more attractive this way, but not everyone agrees. In fact, many people say I look GAYER like this. I think I just look sexier.

What do you think?

I suppose pictures like this aren't helping my case as far as heterosexuality goes..

But the pose wasn't meant to excite gay guys, it was meant for my special lady fans like Jeannie and Nina!

Which reminds me, ladies, care to dance??

I knew that you would...

Because you two are my biggest fans, I have decided to clone myself and create multiple Billy Zanes so that...

Yes that's right! Billy Zane orgy!!!!

WANT MORE??? (come on, you know you do...)