Run - Part 2
In his haste to put as many miles between him and Sunnydale as possible Oz failed to notice the two figures in the parking lot until he walked right into one of them. Without slowing down to look up he muttered his apologies.
Glancing in the man's general direction the brunette mumbled something before turning his attention back to his companion and their latest argument. It took a moment for his mind to register what his eyes had seen, but as soon as it did he stopped mid step and turned. "Oz?!"
As the familiar voice reached his ears Oz froze. Though his mind ordered his feet to keep moving they wouldn't budge. It was as if his heart had stepped in and said enough, finally refusing to listen to his rationalizations and excuses any longer. Inhaling deeply he tried to prepare himself. "Hey."
As Xander met the werewolf's eyes he was instantly torn in two. Half of him wanted to rush up and punch him for what he'd done, while the other half wanted to hug him. Somehow, against all odds, the two had become friends and he had missed him, worrying about him right alongside everyone else. Xander decided to skip both actions and take the safe, far less dramatic route, talk. "So . . ." and somehow out of all the countless questions swirling through his mind the first one to find it's way to his mouth was, "new look?"
Like everything else Oz took the question in stride, shrugging his shoulders and reaching up to stroke the short beard he hard forgotten about. Nodding to Xander's companion, his face betrayed none of the shock he felt. "New friend?"
Looking at Spike Xander laughed out loud at the absurdity. "Hardly. But don't worry, he's good now."
"Am not!" Spike growled giving Xander a menacing look that pre-neutering would have had the boy peeing in his pants. Unfortunately, post-neutering all he got for his troubles was an exaggerated roll of the eyes.
"Okay. Okay. Spike is still mean and horrifying. Except that since he can no longer harm living creatures he aids us in the fight against all things dark and demon-like."
Spike was helping them now? Absolutely none of it was making any sense. Ah, home sweet Sunnydale.
"Long story huh?"
Xander nodded and decided to take the plunge and ask the big question. "Have you talked to Willow yet?"
Motioning back to the club Oz said, "I saw her."
"Since you're in the parking lot talking to me I'm gonna guess the key word here is saw." Oz nodded. "You want me to get her?" Oz remained silent and Xander's voice took on a rare pleading quality. "She needs to know you're back."
"Xander, I'm not sure I am. Back." Oz's voice was small and wounded, even to his own ears. "I think maybe it's best for everybody if I just keep going."
Xander couldn't believe what he was hearing. Oz had come back only to leave again?? "Best for who?"
"I saw her in there. With him."
"Him?" Spike and Xander looked at each other puzzled for a moment before it came to them. "Oh, Graham. He's a friend, that's all."
Except for the time Willow was held captive by the mayor, Xander couldn't name ever seeing any emotion on Oz's face except love for her. The raw pain he saw there now was unsettling. "I saw them kiss."
The forgotten vampire spoke up. "Did they use tongues?"
"What the hell kind of question is that?!" Xander exclaimed while Oz blanched further at the words.
"Hey! It's a valid question."
"I didn't study technique. All I know is she looked happy. She's moved on, it's time for me to do the same." Even though it was the last thing he wanted to do he didn't see any other option.
Fury raged through Xander. "So that's it? You breeze in catch a glimpse of her in a rare moment when she's not in gut wrenching agony and you're going to breeze back out? Not even a phone call to let her know you're okay? Or even to let her know that you're splitting for good? God, I never would have thought you could be that cruel Oz. But I guess I shouldn't be surprised after what you've already done to her." Xander wished he'd gone with his first instinct and belted him, but at this point verbal assault was almost as satisfying. "Maybe it is best if you keep going."
"Do you think this is easy for me?"
"Oh bloody hell!" With an exasperated sigh Spike lit a cigarette. "How I managedto digest humans is beyond me. With all your mamby pamby boo hooing and the like the lot of you make me want to heave." Spike focused on Oz. "Say what you want about us vamps but at least we're honest with ourselves. If we want something we go after it."
"If this was about what I wanted I'd march in there right now, wrap my arms around her and never let her go. But this isn't about what I want. I've made too many mistakes as it is, I know that, believe me. I can't change any of it. All I can now is what's best for her. I can't bear to cause her any more pain."
Spike snickered. "You've lied to her, cheated on her, and then you killed the bitch in front of her. For an encore you packed up and skipped town leaving the woman who loves you to sit and wonder endlessly about every moment she shared with you. If any of them really meant anything. If there would ever be another. Hell, she doesn't even know if you're alive or dead. Do you honestly believe that seeing her, talking to her, no matter what the outcome, could possibly do any more damage than all of that?"
After taking a deep drag and giving the boy a moment to digest it all Spike continued. "Take a deep whiff, wolf. That's fear seeping from your pores, not nobility. You want the chit so badly you can't even see straight. Now that she's within your reach you're terrified that she's going to tell you to sod off. Which she might, and maybe she should, but rather than face it like a man you're going to turn tail and run." With a final puff Spike tossed the cigarette. "Fine, just don't use her best interest as a shield to do it under. If that was your main concern you'd have the wrinklies to face her and put her mind at rest so she can either get on with forgiving you or get on with her life. What have you go to lose at this point? Pride? Dignity? Believe me mate those won't keep your bed nearly as warm at night as the redhead would."
Xander could tell by the silence that Spike's words were getting to him. "As much as it kills me to admit it blondie's right. What's best for Willow is to talk to you. I don't know how she's going to react but I do know that she loves you. Even after everything she loves you more than ever. How can you just walk away from that? Away from her?"
Before Oz had a chance to answer another voice spoke up. "Practice." As Willow stepped forward from the shadows she focused her gaze on Xander and Spike, unable to look at Oz.
Oz groaned as he saw that Graham was next to her, one hand on her shoulder.
The lights reflected the tears she had been unable to contain and Xander was by her side in an instant. "Will, how long have you been there?" "Long enough." She turned to Oz with a mixture of pain and fury shining in tear filled eyes. "Xander was right, after three months you spend a few minutes inside the Bronze and assume that your life is gone? I'm sorry if whatever you saw in there hurt you, but what choice did any of us have? I wasn't given a say remember? You made all the decisions yourself. You abandoned your life and all of us along with it. The world kept on moving despite your absence, but it wasn't something we chose, it was a position you put us in. And now you're going to punish us for it by leaving again? If you cared you'd at least try. How can you be so willing to just walk away?" As Willow was overcome by emotion her voice failed.
Throwing everything to the wind Oz reacted with his heart and stepped forward, closing the gap between them. As he reached out and took her hand Willow looked at him with more pain than he had ever seen and her body quivered with the silent sobs. "Will, can we go somewhere and talk? Please."
Taking a large gulp of air Willow forced herself to speak around the lump in her throat as she shook her head. "There's nothing left to say." Pulling her hand out of his Willow turned and quickly ran off.
Oz started to go after her but Xander's hand reached out stopping him. "Oz, I don't think she's going to listen to you right now. Let me talk to her."
Feeling more helpless than he could ever remember Oz watched as Xander ran after Willow.
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