THE WIT OF STEVEN WRIGHT
- Last night i played a blank tape. The mime next door went nuts.
- If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
- Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn't live there.
- If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
- If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
- I went for a walk last night, my kids asked how long i'd be gone. I said "The whole time."
- So, what's the speed of dark?
- Why don't they just make mouse flavored cat food?
- If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
- I just got skylights in my place. The people who live above me are furious.
- Why do they sterilize needles for leathel injections?
- Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
- Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
- Why is abbreviated such a long word?
