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Arafat Thanks Israelis for Demolition - Ramallah, West Bank In a move that surprised many pundits and politicians, PLO President Yasser Arafat released a statement Sunday thanking the Israeli government for the destruction of the majority of his Ramallah headquarters. "I am grateful for the efforts of the Israeli government. My great thanks to Prime Minister Sharon for all his hard work." Arafat continued, “I have wanted to tear that place down years. I even added rider on State Farm policy few years ago just in case something like this happened. Once the adjuster come here, and I get check, renovations will begin!" One public figure who was not surprised by Arafat's statement was Mr. Bob Vila. "Well, Arafat's compound had been falling behind the times for years now. In his type of organization, you rarely have money set aside for building improvements. And while the much of the structure that the Israelis destroyed was solid and serviceable, it wasn't the kind of versatile and fun living space that Mr. Arafat was looking for." Mr. Vila has been contracted by Mr. Arafat as an executive consultant on the redesign process. “Originally, Mr. Arafat was looking to do a ‘Trading Spaces’ episode where he got a chance to let someone else redecorate his compound,” said Vila, “but his two top choices of participants to trade spaces with, Osama bin Laden and Weird Al Yankovic, haven’t been seen in at least year except on video.” Vila and Arafat also released a set of plans for the renovation which include a wireless home theater system on every floor, a palm tree-lined courtyard with a circular pool, gazebo and hot tub, bay windows, and skylights. Arafat’s 13-year-old step-daughter, Fatallah, will have her own fall-out proof basement suite with 3 walk-in closets, a “Princess” canopy bed and a life-sized clay sculpture of Justin Timberlake. Negotiations are also underway to recreate, in the compound's main lobby, “The Star Trek Experience" at the Las Vegas Hilton. Mr. Arafat, according to sources, is a huge fan of "Star Trek: The Next Generation." Specifically, Mr. Arafat expresses a fondness for the beard worn by Jonathan Frakes in the series as Commander William Riker. 
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