Why should you choose the Precious Roy Home Shopping Network?

Precious Roy only offers products of the highest quality. In the unlikely event you are not pleased with any product you buy from the Precious Roy Home Shopping Network just return it along with a small handling fee for a partial refund.

Who is Precious Roy?

Precious Roy grew up in Toledo where he would fight bums for pocket change. At the age of twelve he decided to make something of himself by selling wine to other children. Unfortunately he was not able to get wine. But being resourceful, Precious Roy found grape juice spiked with antifreeze was an easy way to make wine. Building of his resourcefulness, Precious Roy has been able to build an empire by offering products at reasonable prices.

What does the average costumer have to say about our products?

I bought Precious Roy bread crumb swimming trunks last spring. The first time I went to the beach the birds flocked to me. My life hasn’t been the same since.

Folks, what this nice British guy is saying is chicks love the trunks!

©2003 John Larntz,
Not affiliated with the Sifl&Olly show or MTV®