The Fart Retrieval League is a noble organization devoted to the freeing of countless millions of farts trapped in cushions around the world. There is little the league can do to free the little buggers trapped in cushions in places like people's homes or cars. But members can do something about farts trapped in cushions in public places. Elite squads of Fart Commandos are working every day in hotel lobbies and on public transit jumping up and down on cushions to liberate trapped farts. Won't you join them in this humanitarian work? The next time you are on the train or in a hotel lobby jump up and down a few times.

Free a fart!

The world will be a better place for it.

Be sure to support our sponsor..

.

...real good eatin' ...no shit!