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My sister is beside herself, babbling into the phone.

"It was really bad! There were demons... there were so many demons... demons everywhere! And they got... they got between me and Buffy! And she couldn't fight them all! And they were really big... with really big horns and all the claws! And they kept coming! And..."

I take the phone from her. "Faith?"

"Buffy! What's going on? Is everyone OK?"

"More than OK! You should have seen Dawn tonight! I'll let her tell you all about it when she calms down. She just had to call you the minute we were back. But Faith... you should have seen her! They ambushed us on the way back from the store, and she fought back... and I mean she really fought back. She's good, Faith! You were so right! She can defend herself. I'm going to start training her, now. I'm going to bring her on patrols." Truth is, I'm as excited as Dawn, only with less jumping around!

"Little Dawnie? Good for her! I'll sleep a lot better knowing you have another fighter in the house!"

"'Little Dawnie' is taller than me, Faith... and she's quick. I got it so wrong... I don't need to protect her from the world... I need to show it to her. There's so much I want to show her! I'm starting her off with all defensive tactics, but I'm gonna teach her everything I know!"

Dawn takes the phone back. "Buffy says I have some Slayer in me! She's not going to make me hide all the time anymore, she wants me to patrol with her sometimes!" I can't hear Faith's response. "I know, I'll be careful, but Buffy really thinks I'm ready! Oh, Faith! You have to get out, we can all go on patrol together!" I can make out the sound of Faith laughing–and I'm saddened by how surprising it is to hear. Dawn replies, "OK, I'm gonna remember you promised!"

I catch Dawn's eye and she hands the phone back. "Faith says you're an OK Slayer, and I should pay attention to what you tell me for now, but she's gonna teach me all the wicked moves a real Slayer knows when she gets out."

I roll my eyes and take the phone. "Give me a break! Wicked moves. I could kick your ass from here, little girl! By the time I'm done with Dawn, she'll be ready to kick your ass too!" Sometimes I miss the fighting more than the sex.

"We'll see about that, darling! But you're past your prime. Twenties is so over the hill for a Slayer. And don't forget who took out eight vamps in one shot last week!"

It's true. We get Faith on the phone for most Scooby meetings now, and it was her idea to flood the cave. Washed them all out into the morning sun. I was ready to charge into their lair, but I know a few would have escaped. Now that we've given her maps of Sunnydale, the sewers, the caves... she's helping out almost like she's here. She may be taking Karate 101, but she's a warrior, and she thinks like one.

"OK, Faith, you're a big help, but you have it easy, not doing the actual slaying! No bruises, no close calls... and you don't end up hungry and horny at the end of the night!"

"Don't I?" she asks, slyly.

Dawn heard me. She's trying not to smile. Well, it's no secret what slaying does to Slayers. Not since Faith started blabbing it to all my friends! Probably explains why I kept sleeping with vampires. Willow even got me a vibrating "back massager" for my birthday, for "instant gratification" after slaying. It would be a lot easier to live that down if I didn't love the damn thing so much. I've secretly named it Faith.

"Get my letter," my wife commands.

"The weird one?" Every line had a number. Weird. And yummy! "Hold on just a second, darling..." I hand the phone to my sister and shut myself upstairs in my bedroom. "OK, Faith," I say once Dawn's off the line, "what's with the numbers?"

"No privacy here. But... number four is sounding pretty good."

Number four. Ah. She writes that she's lightly kissing my neck. "Well then. I think I'll unbutton my blouse."

"You did come back horny! Number eleven..."

"I'm not wearing one, honey!"

"Well, then... right to twelve."

"Mmmm... that's nice," I whisper, reading. "Don't forget the left one."

"Sure thing. Number thirteen, B."

"That does it. I have to kiss you now. Both hands behind your head, under your hair."

"Number six?"

"Yes. Sucking on your tongue. And my hands are slipping lower all the while. Unbuttoning your pants." In reality, I'm unbuttoning my own.

"Number twenty-one."

I read. "Are you really? Think I'll slip a hand inside your undies and find out for myself.... My! You certainly are. Better get you out of those before they're soaked..." I strip and climb under the sheets with the phone. We've teased each other plenty over the phone before, but not like this. This is really getting to me.

"B, I hope you're... you know..."

"I'm touching myself, Faith. And it's you I feel. You can't?"

"No privacy. But don't worry, B, I'll catch up after lights out! And remember I've got some nice polaroids of you... you don't have any of me! I'm enjoying myself just fine. In fact, I'm starting to get hungry for some thirty-four..."

"Little tricky while I'm still wearing my pants."

"I heard you take 'em off."

"OK, fair enough. I'll just settle back and get comfortable... I've missed that pretty tongue..."

Twenty minutes later our time is up, and she's brought me to orgasm twice. "Oh, Faith... you don't know... how bad... I needed that..." Her breath is fast and ragged too, and I want the same for her! I so much want her to feel my love explode inside her, the way I've just felt hers. But it will be a long, long time before that can happen again.

 

---

 

"So how are classes, college girl?"

"Not bad, Red... half of the classes here aren't really worth college credit, but if they still have cars when I get out of this dump, I'll be able to fix 'em!"

Dawn and Xander and I are sitting off to the side while Willow and Tara catch up with Faith. "How about your web site?" asks Tara. "Do we get to see it?"

"Almost done! Just put a slash and then 'vampirefaith' after the prison address."

Willow leans forward. "What kind of server is it?" Will and Faith talk tech for a while, and the rest of us listen as our eyes glaze over. Willow doesn't get to babble about computers much, but that's her main thing now that she's done with magic.

"But what's your site about?" asks Tara, changing the subject before we all fall asleep.

"It's about vampires. What else? I thought there should be a site that tells how to kill them, and everything. The real facts. It could save people's lives!"

"Well I hope people take it seriously, then," I say with a proud smile. You just can't keep a Slayer from her duty! "And how about Karate? Are you managing to keep up?"

"Um. Well. The teacher says I'm sloppy and... maybe a little cocky. So it's not as easy as I thought. But maybe I'll learn a thing or two after all! And I don't have as much time to work out as I used to, so it's cool to have one good physical class. I never show my real strength, but I think I'll pass! I broke two boards with my hand."

"Faith, you could break two boards with one finger!" notes Xander. She shrugs.

"You got my letter?" she asks.

"Which letter? The one with the..." I pause, blushing. "The uh.... the... thing with the... four fingers?" I catch Tara trying not to smile.

She arches her eyebrows. "No, after that. The one about the food."

Even that leads my mind in several pleasantly adult directions... but it also reminds me of the submarine sandwich in my bag. "Almost forgot!" I say, and hand it over. We put everything on it that a sandwich can hold. Plus some other things. Dawn's recipe, mostly.

Faith looks longingly at it and hands it back. "Sorry, guys. You don't know how bad I need that, but I just can't. You'll understand when you read my letter."

I don't understand, but I let it go, giving my wife a concerned look. Have they started tracking her calories from these visits, too?

"Well then," I announce, "let's get down to business! You didn't think we all came out here together just for fun, did you?"

Willow starts stacking old books on the table, and Xander pieces together the four parts of an ancient scroll I took from a vampire–who fought to the death to keep it. It's quite a puzzle, and we all know something very, very evil is going down in Sunnydale. Lot of that going around lately! "I'm starting to miss the days of battling nerds," I sigh. "We really need you in person this time, Faith... so we brought the Scooby meeting to you!"

Willow starts explaining what we know already, and my heart soars to see Faith's face change as she starts to become the very best of her old self. The Slayer. Self-assured, even cocky, but good at what she does. One day that Slayer will be out on the streets of Sunnydale again, and I know a few hundred vampires and demons who had better stay the hell out of her way! I wish I enjoyed slaying half as much as she does. Did... Will.

 

---

 

Poor Faith! I can see she's losing weight. Her letter did explain: she's starving herself. We'd been bringing her food three or four times a week, sometimes more, but even so she was often so hungry she couldn't stand it. I'm glad I don't know what that's like, day after day. So she's working out extra hard–even at night in the dark–and she's starving herself. My wife is starving herself! Spitting food into her napkin. Spreading it around the plate instead of eating. Hiding a little in her pocket. Giving a little away. Eating whatever has the least calories. Throwing whole meals away if nobody's looking! Even forcing herself to vomit sometimes. She has real will power, but I know she's making herself very sick.

But what choice does she have? She won't get more calories from the dietitian unless her weight drops, so she decided to make that happen. Once they start feeding her more, we'll start bringing her food again as well. Maybe that will keep her fed at last.

"How's the diet?" I ask, sitting down and stroking her arm. Dawn's tagging along as usual.

"It's working. I think I'll be off of it by the end of the week. Either that or go crazy and start eating my blankets."

Good. I'm glad this will be over soon. It's obvious that she's doing badly. Starvation has made her tense, her voice strained. Dawn's brow is wrinkled with worry. "I'll make you a big bowl of..." she catches my look and stops. No need to make this any harder for Faith! "...um... of something really gross that you won't even want anyway!"

"Thanks, Creature! Can't wait." That's classic Faith false cheer. She's been smashing something into the table... looks like it was a foam cup before she went slayer on it.

"Did something happen?" Dawn asks.

Faith doesn't answer but her jaw is shaking and her eyes are staring at the flattened cup. Her knuckles whiten as she presses harder.

"What happened?" My tone is cold. I suddenly have a very bad feeling. I don't think I want to hear this.

"My mother."

That bitch. "Forget her. She's not worth losing sleep over. Honey... don't think about her." My tone softens at the end.

"She wrote a letter."

"Tear it up and send it back. Don't even read it!"

"Not to me. To the parole board." Her jaw muscles are clenched and I can tell she's on the edge of pushing that smashed piece of foam right through the steel tabletop.

"What?!"

"My lawyer screwed up. Wrote to my mom. Not about me living with her to get early parole, even. Just in general, to let her know she might be able to help down the road. But in between the highs and the lows my mom's not stupid. She knows that might come up. And she doesn't want to help at all. She hates me."

"What did she say?" Dawn and I are staring at her in dread.

"She wrote some bullshit about loving me dearly, I'm her whole reason for living, but she's afraid of what I might do to innocent people if I got out. Asked them to make sure I get the maximum possible sentence. And she sent a nice list of reasons. Things I never even did...! But with just enough truth in them to sound real. She mentioned true stuff from my juvenile record–which the parole board gets to see, now that I'm a juvy! And she's mixed in stuff that never happened. Did you know I used to kill other kids' pets and then threaten to do the same to them if they didn't steal from their parents for me? Funny, you'd think I'd remember a thing like that."

Dawn's look of cold rage must mirror mine. We both know she raised some hell in her early teens, but she never hurt anyone. My hand on Faith's arm is shaking.

She continues. "I did get arrested for breaking and entering, and stealing a puppy from some kid's house. The kid told the cops all kinds of things when I was taken away. But it wasn't like that. I didn't break in. I was selling teddy bears for the class trip to the zoo. His mom was buying one, and then she had to answer the phone. The door was open in front of me. And I saw the puppy tied by the tail to the sofa, weak and bleeding. No water even. I couldn't stand it. So I went in and freed it and ran. That's it! But the record doesn't say that. And now they've got my mom's letter about how I kidnapped eight animals and showed the bodies to the kids to scare them. Her word against mine. Doesn't even have to stand up in court... years from now when I have a chance to get out, the parole board can consider anything they find in the file. And they will."

I take a deep breath. I'm about to do some damage to the table myself. Her mom may have undone everything Faith achieved by giving up CVs. "Damn her! But... I'm sure your lawyer will have it all cleared up by the time you're up for parole!"

Faith shrugs angrily. "She'll do some damage control I guess. But who are they gonna believe? The criminal or the loving mother? You know, she wrote that she saved up for months to buy me a flute, like I always wanted, and I beat her with it and broke four teeth. I never even knew until yesterday that her hospital report said it was me that broke them. I don't even know who really did it, but I heard it happen. Probably a drug dealer, if she lied about it to the doctor. But there it is in my file now, initialed by doctors and police! She sent a copy! And a copy of a letter from my band teacher too! All it says is that I had to drop out of the band after only one day, because I broke my flute. Well it was a plastic flute, and I bought it myself, and my mother broke it when I tried to play for her. I was so excited to be in the band finally... And guess what? A week ago I signed up for flute lessons next term. Doesn't that just add a nice little detail to my file? Shit!"

"I hate her," says Dawn coldly.

"I'm going to Boston," I whisper.

"Don't, Buffy! Seriously! You'll only make things ten times worse."

I stare at the table top, trying to calm down but just getting angrier and angrier. "I want to do something!"

"Will you testify for me at a hearing?"

"Of course!"

"My lawyer said that at some point I may need some character witnesses. Like you and Dawn and the gang. Maybe Angel."

"We'll all be there for you, you know we will! When?"

"Maybe in five years when I'm up for parole. Maybe sooner if this thing with my mom starts affecting my privileges. I'd say we can kiss any future CVs goodbye at this point. That was never too likely, but now... forget it!"

"Don't say that, Faith. If there's any hope at all, we won't let her stop us. We can't!"

We sit silently fuming, all three of us, trying to calm down. "I don't believe it," mutters Dawn softly, staring into space.

"What?" asks Faith.

"You sold teddy bears?!"

 

---

 

"Don't let the box fool you," I say, presenting the pizza to my wife. "This is homemade. Slayer Special: lots of garlic. And everything else you like!"

"Oh, baby, I love you so much!" she says, staring at it. "And you too, B!"

"How's the new meal plan?" They finally started feeding her more. Almost as much as she was eating before she was a juvy. Almost what she needs.

"It's been two days," she says between mouthfuls, "and already I've gained back a lot of the weight. I'm still hungry sometimes... but not crazy hungry!"

"Well, we'll keep you fed. Dawnie's just itching to get back in the kitchen for you, and I think Willow has some cookies in the freezer with your name on them. The pizza's all my creation, though. I wanted to do something special for you today."

"It's damn good pizza, B! Have some," she says, "there's plenty."

But she's tearing through it in the most alarming way, and I only end up eating one slice before it's gone.

"Thanks, Buffy," she says, sitting back to breathe and wiping her mouth.

"Happy anniversary."

"What?" She stares, caught off guard. "It's not..."

"Not our anniversary anniversary, no. But a year ago yesterday we both woke up and vowed to keep our hands off each other. And a year ago this morning, just after midnight, I made love to you for the first time. I was pretty bad at it as I recall!" I take her right hand in mine across the table.

She smiles, then laughs, but her eyes are filling with tears. "How could I forget? Worst sex I ever had!" I glance at the guard reading by the door. I feel slightly embarrassed. But that's nothing to what I'll be feeling soon.

"We're going to celebrate, you and I," I whisper. This is going to work. It is going to. Because it has to!

She opens her mouth to ask a question. I know she doesn't understand. I let go of her hand–that lovely hand that has killed hundreds of evil beasts, saved hundreds of lives, and brought me to the most excruciating orgasms. I begin trailing my fingers lightly over the back of her hand and wrist. I feel a little tremor run through her, and she forgets her question.

I catch her eye and mouth my message silently. "I am going to make love to you."

"Wh... what?"

"Right here. Right now," I say aloud. She has helped me to climax again and again over the phone. It's time for me to return the favor.

Sneaking a glance over my shoulder at the guard and his magazine, I turn her hand over and caress the palm... the soft underside of her lovely wrist. She stares at me, bewildered. Almost frightened. Good. I'm getting through to her.

"Think about me, Faith. Think about what you want from me. Maybe think about number forty-eight.... I know I am." Her eyes widen, still locked on mine.

I'm glad my back is to the guard. Very slowly, I take my hand away and bring it to my mouth. Without breaking eye contact for an instant, I lick my fingers... slowly, sensually... just as I would after... well, number thirty-three. I see the tremor this time. Her mouth is working slowly, but she's not finding any words.

I lick wetly. Making sure she can hear the little sounds of it. Making my fingers slick and shiny. And then I slip them under her hand and begin caressing again. More wet sounds. I tease the very center of her palm. A light, tickling, slippery touch. She gasps.

I keep at it, working my wet fingers against her skin, lightly then harder, fast then slow. All the while holding her gaze, and willing her to imagine the same intimacies that I am.

I thought I might need to help her along by mentioning some specifics by number. But already her breathing is getting faster and louder. Her head is starting to tilt back, and her eyes are slowly narrowing. Words aren't needed.

I keep teasing her, wetting my fingers occasionally with fresh, warm saliva. Hidden inside our clasped hands, I am making love to my wife. My own breath is getting loud now. My own heart is racing to match hers. I can tell she's feeling what I want her to feel, in places I'm no longer allowed to touch.

Suddenly her body spasms. Her head jerks slightly and she lets out a tiny, high-pitched grunt, her eyes squeezing shut. Her entire body seems to pulse with a rhythm that comes from deep inside. Her hand contracts around my fingers, just slightly, over and over. It lasts quite a while. Eventually, she slumps forward weakly.

It worked. This time it's me left unsatisfied until I can find some privacy.

"Are you OK, darling?" I glance back at the guard, who still isn't paying attention to us.

She looks up shakily. "Oh my God... Buffy!" she whispers.

I lean forward and clasp both hands tightly. "I love you, Faith." We're both beginning to weep silently.

"I love you too," she croaks, trying to regain her voice.

Not a bad anniversary at all.

 

Continued with "CV-13"

 

I would be grateful if you would give me your comments and rate my stories in my Guestbook, or email me. Reader responses will determine whether I publish more stories, and will help improve them! Thanks for reading! (If you'd like to be notified when I post new stories, let me know.)

If you enjoyed this story, try I Have Never Been to Boston. Dawn sets out to say goodbye to someone she loves–but who she knows never even existed!

I miss her so bad. I need to see her again. Say goodbye. But she's not real. So here I am, to make that sink in once and for all. I have to see with my own two eyes that she never lived. That she never loved me. Because even I didn't exist.

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