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Nunc, Latine accipio. Mihi nomen Romanum est Tiberius. Caesar secundus Romae Tiberius Claudius Nero erat. Tiberius privignus Caesaris Augusti et patruus Caligulae erat. Tiberius Gracchus tribunus plebii erat. Vir magnus erat. Frater suus erat Gaius Gracchus. Gaius etiam tribunus plebii erat et vir magnus erat. Viri, tamen, a patriciis necati sunt. Brevi tempore, multa et mira scribam.
Illa fabula Menenii Agrippae Menenius erat vir Romanus, quamquam plebeius. Ubi patricii et plebeii inter se pugnabant, Menenius Agrippa fabulam narravit de stomacho et brachiis. In ea fabula, bracchia irata erant quod stomachus totum cibum habuit. Bracchia igitur non iam laborabant (went on strike?). Tum bracchia infirma erant quod neque ea neque bracchia cibum habuerunt. Tandem bracchia iterum laborabant et stomachus cibum habuerunt. January 13, 1 B.C. Dear Cassius, Are you still working on the Y zero K problem? This change from BC to AD is giving us a lot of headaches and we haven't much time left. I don't know how people will cope with working the wrong way around. Having been working happily downwards forever, now we have to start thinking upwards. You would think that someone would have thought of it earlier and not left it to us to sort out at the last minute. I spoke to Caesar the other evening. He was livid that Julius hadn't done something about it when he was sorting out the calendar. He said he could see why Brutus turned nasty. We called in the consulting astrologers, but they simply said that continuing downwards using minus BC won't work. As usual, the consultants charged a fortune for doing nothing useful. As for myself, I just can't see the sand in an hourglass flowing upwards. We have heard that there are 3 wise guys in the east working on the problem, but unfortunately they won't arrive till it's all over. Some say the world will cease to exist at the moment of transition. Anyway we are continuing to work on this blasted Y zero K problem and I will send you a parchment if anything further develops. Plutonius. January 14, 1 B.C. Dear Plutonius, I received your parchment today from a nice young man named Marathon. He ran from Rome in a day. I don't think Pegasus could have flown that fast. People here are also confused with the whole Y zero K issue. I'm having a centurion of a time trying to convince the locals that everything is going to be okay. Just the other day my father said that he's going to have to stock up on grapes, water and grain. He believes the arena's lions will escape and run the village resulting in complete chaos. I don't think the gladiators will stand for that. Father also says the town aqueduct will no longer work, as water will flow upwards in the new millenium. And cousin Octavian is practicing to write upwards from the bottom of his slate. The gods must be crazy. Oh, there's a new babe in town. She says she's a Christian -- whatever that means. Cassius Tibi epistulas mittere licet hic
Background by Morion. |
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