THE OLD PHILOSOPHER SEZ,

We all like to make fun of others. Especially if 
they're from a different ethnic group or go to 
a different school. Or maybe just live in a 
different neighborhood. We see them as not 
being as smart as we are, and maybe a little 
backward  Here's a do it yourself kit. All you 
have to do is supply the person that you enjoy 
making fun of.....DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE...

..._______who spent 4 days in Sears looking for wheels 
for a miscarriage.

..._______who took his pregnant wife to the grocery 
store because they had free delivery?

...______who looked in the lumberyard for the draft 
board?

...______who took a roll of toilet paper to a crap game?

...______who put iodine on his paycheck because he 
got a cut in his salary?

..._____who was so lazy, he married a pregnant woman?

...______who was feeling so low he got his face slapped?

...______who lost his girlfriend cause he couldn't remember 
where he laid her?

...______who thought asphalt was rectum trouble?

...______who called his girlfriend tapioca cause she 
could be made in a minute?

...______who though his typewriter was pregnant cause 
it missed a period?

...______who wore a union suit cause his wife was 
in labor?

...______who thought "No Kidding" meant birth control?

..._____who thought Peter Pan was something you 
put under the bed?

..._____who thought a sanitary belt was a drink from 
a clean glass?

..._____who thought Moby Dick was a venereal
disease?

..._____who thought a mushroom was a place to 
neck?

..._____who married a colored woman so his kids 
could have chocolate milk?

..._____who wouldn't go out with his wife cause 
he heard she was  married?

..._____who bought a set of snow tires and they 
melted before he got home?

..._____who bought a set of water skis but couldn't 
find a lake with a hill on it?

..._____who dropped his gum in a chicken coup and 
thought he found it five times?

..._____who thought a cockfight was between 2 
lesbians?

..._____who couldn't play golf cause he didn't know 
his ass from a hole in the ground?

..._____who was told by his doctor that he had 
sugar in his urine, so the next morning he peed 
on his Wheaties?

..._____who spent the night in a warehouse because 
he couldn't spell?

..._____who had 1,500 girlfriends. He was a shepherd.