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Important Notice

This work of fiction is intended for mature audiences only. There are adult themes and language, nudity, sensuality, sexuality, alternative lifestyles (including depictions of homosexuality), and the like.

If we were a film, we would have an "R" or an "NC-17" rating.

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Listen to the Castaway theme
Listen to the Castaway theme
castaway.mp3 (640kb)
Joan the Host
"Is this thing on?" <taps microphone>

"Okay... I'm Joan Fogarty, the executive producer and host of what's going to be the hottest new show of the summer season 'Castaway'. One of the castaways is going to win a million dollars.

<Joan grins toothily>

"Let me give a brief rundown on the show's premise. We've taken 16 American strangers and stranded them on an uninhabited island in the middle of the South China Sea. They have to survive with no modern conveniences."

<a round of grumbles goes 'round the room>

<Joan chuckles>

"It's perfectly safe. The castaways are provided all the fresh water and rice they want. We also have a first-aid hut set up across the island and staffed with a full-time medical staff."

<a reporter raises his hand and asks, "What does it take to win the million dollars? What are the rules?">

"I was just getting to that. Okay... the castaways will be broken down into two teams, the Alphas and the Betas. The teams will compete with each other in a series of challenges."

<Joan smiles as though she knows a secret she's not quite willing to share>

"That part is going to be really fun. The team that loses the challenge has to vote one of its members off the island. So the number of castaways is always shrinking. The winning team is granted immunity from losing a member, and gets a luxury item as a prize."

<several hands shoot up but Joan ignores them>

"I already know what you're going to ask. The luxury items range from tools or materials to make the castaways daily survival easier... to more frivolous, fun items. It's different with every challenge. But for more specifics about the rules you should visit our website. All your questions will be answered there."

<Joan looks off stage, noticing that another producer is waiting in wings, ready to announce his new show. She decides there is always time for one more plug>

"The season premiere is June 16, at 12 p.m. Eastern Time. Don't miss it!"

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