The professor, came close to his face and kissed him hard on the mouth. Reno gasped as the
demon of pain pushed him raggedly down onto the dissecting table, and knocked him out with
a dose of something.
When he awoke, Reno could not move.
‘I’ve given that meddlesome Turk an injection, so don’t expect any help
from him,’ the professor jabbed at the corner where Rude was sleeping peacefully.
‘And now, my dear, dear boy, it’s time to test your endurance,’ his
scratchy voice said.
He came forward, again, kissing Reno on the mouth. He gagged, but could not move the
professor, who climbed onto the table to straddle him.
He could not look away, nor plug his ears. The only part of his body he could vaguely move
were his fingers and eyes.
The professor began to grind his hips against Reno’s, letting out disgusting moans of
pleasure. He could not say anything.
After a few minutes of that torture, he finally ripped off the
bothersome clothing of Reno’s and clasped his mouth around him.
Reno closed his eyes, trying to pretend it was someone else.
Finally, he removed his own clothing and thrust inside of Reno. He shut his eyes tight,
trying to imagine it was anyone….anyone but the professor.
When he was finished, he put his clothing back on, leaving
Reno how he was.
‘If you try to tell the Turk,’ he hissed, jabbing at Rude, ‘you’ll
encounter this every day.’
‘However,’ he continued, grinning horribly, ‘perhaps this exercise will be
more…hmm…sporadic.’
Reno, ashamed, just kept his eyes closed. He could feel the drug wearing off…
When he could move, he quickly gathered up his clothing, and ran to his cell. Rude was
still sleeping peacefully in the corner.
Once at his cell, he threw himself onto the cot and curled into a fetal position.
That’s why he had been sore, all those times…
In the months that followed, the professor carried out his
wishes upon Reno a number of times…and the boy concurred, not wanting to shame
himself, and not wanting to project more rapes on himself than necessary.
Rude tried to talk to him, but he always ignored him. Always. He did not get a single word
out of him.
He told him what it looked like outside of Midgar, what ‘Reno’s Hell’ was
like, everything that he doubted Reno would ever see.
And then it happened. The experiments ended.
The professor found a new, younger girl to focus on that sparked a higher interest for
some reason, and dismissed Reno.
So, at Rude’s, and even the interrogator’s request, he was thrown into the
Turks.
The Turks. He mused at this group. The interrogator was
the leader, his new boss. He had never hated the man…he was just doing his job. He
doubted he derived sadistic pleasure from abusing him as the professor did, so he tried to
understand.
Because the man, for some strange reason, was decent to him. He said he had a lot of
potential.
‘Now that you’re actually here,’ the interrogator, who’s name he
learned was Tseng, ‘you have a right to a name.’
‘I have had a name, sir.’
‘What is it?’
‘Reno, sir.’
He nodded. ‘Ah yes, fair enough nameless—I mean Reno,’ he chuckled wryly,
‘we need to get used to this new…arrangement.’
Little did he know that year ago that the man that beat him senseless would become a close
friend in years to come.
Time passed quickly for Reno and the rest of the Turks. He learned to use a weapon of
choice…something called an electromag rod…which he was quite skillful at. The
interrogator, or rather Tseng, knew he had incredible endurance and a knack for not
showing emotion. He told him so too, which he thought to be an admirable quality.
Their first mission, or at least Reno’s, was to be at hand. He trained, worked and
learned…everyday for months. And in that time, he grew to have his own personality. A
cocky, sarcastic one much like the one he had shown to Rude, but less disciplined. It was
his own way of taking revenge on all the people that had treated him like dirt.
The first mission. It was to find, and if possible, kidnap, a small teenage girl named
Aeris. She was the one the professor was so interested in.
Reno was cold. He had always been cold to outsiders, but to him, everyone was an outsider
now. So, Tseng went to Aeris’ house one day to try to logically convince her. And
that was the day Reno met the interrogator’s one weakness.
Aeris was a beautiful girl, with long flowing chestnut hair and huge, green eyes which
seemed to stare through you. She was only a couple years younger than Reno, but very young
when Tseng had first met her. However, Reno could see, when Tseng looked at Aeris, he saw
her.
When the interrogator had looked at him, he saw a job, his prey, and he was the
interrogator, the predator, and the evil villain who everyone hated.
When Tseng looked at Aeris, he saw her. He was the lover, the poet, and the swooned. To
Reno, it was strange. He had never been in love.
It was that mission that the Turks taught him something he thought didn’t exist
– the compassion of a killer.
It was late afternoon by the time they reached Aeris’
house, and Reno’s first time out of the ShinRa building itself. Rude saw him staring
in wonder at the huge buildings, and he smiled in his head. In the physical world however,
he nudged him and gave him the ‘look.’ Today, the ‘look’ meant,
‘Be professional!’
Reno, who still literally had not said a word to him since the day he tried to escape, got
the look. This time he agreed though.
They came to Aeris’ house, and it had to be the most enchanting, beautiful thing Reno
had ever seen. Little flowers were dotted everywhere, and the house itself was nothing
like the slums Reno sometimes dreamed about.
Tseng knocked on the door, and motioned for Reno and Rude to wait outside. They both gave
him questioning looks, but Rude suddenly understood and nodded empathetically. He was cold
to the assailant, but Rude himself would lay his life on the line for Reno or Tseng.
Reno snuck a glance into the house, and to his great embarrassment, found Aeris and Tseng
in a tight, passionate embrace, kissing frantically. He immediately withdrew when no one
noticed, but Rude had a slightly bemused look on his face.
‘Wasn’t expecting that?’
No answer.
‘Look Reno, you have to talk to me.’
Reno looked at him.
‘You’re right. I will talk to you, when I need to. It is the professional thing
to do.’
Rude just nodded, not knowing what to say.
But Reno added, ‘But, I am not required to socialise with you.’
He turned his back to stare out into the garden. Aeris really was beautiful. He
sighed…he’d never realised how lonely he was. All he’d ever known was the
tainted ‘love’ of the professor, and that was all. He’d never thought about
it.
Locked in the Shinra tower for all those years…he’d never known love. Not once.
No one had ever loved him. He had no parents, no friends…only the professor’s
sex, and although he was ashamed to admit it, he was actually grateful that someone even
wanted him at all.
He wondered how Rude had grown up, looking over at him now. His bemused look had morphed
into a stoic stare out to the stream that flowed through Aeris’ garden, and he’d
never noticed it before, but the man looked depressed most of the time.
‘Rude?’
‘Yes?’ he answered without turning around.
‘What’s your last name?’
‘I thought you didn’t like to socialise. Well, neither do I.’
Reno was not that easily rebuffed.
‘I need it for protocol,’ he said, flashing him a sarcastic smirk. He could tell
Rude rolled his eyes behind his sunglasses.
‘I don’t have one,’ he replied.
Reno stared at him for a second as he said it, curiosity burning to know what he meant.
‘Why?’
Rude looked over now, surprised. He turned back around, and sighed.
‘I was taken in by some people when my parents died. They named me Rude because they
said I had a rude tongue.’
He wore a harsh, hard expression on his face now.
‘They both committed suicide. I grew up in the slums, wiggled my way into the Turks,
and have been here since I was your age.’
Reno didn’t know what to say. He had always assumed Rude had a relatively normal
childhood, but judging now, he had to wonder.
‘Rude, you ever been in love?’
He turned sharply now, scrutinizing Reno, but he was rebuffed by the stark look of
curiosity.
‘Yes,’ he finally replied after a century.
‘Have you?’
‘No. I never knew enough people,’ Reno replied a matter of a factly. One would
have thought he’d be more emotional, but Reno was emotionless. Everything was fact or
fiction…nothing in between. He may have asked emotional questions, but with his job,
it was his pure instinct and nature to find out any weakness his surroundings possessed,
especially after growing up in a cell.
Tseng stormed out, slamming the door.
Reno and Rude just stared at him. He shook his head…’She won’t
come…damn it, she’s going to get herself killed.’
He sighed. Reno gaped in shock. He had never seen Tseng upset, not once. Rude just looked
on sadly, knowing he was right.
‘Well,’ he said, his gaze at the house hardening, ‘I can’t help any
other way but try to talk to her.’
And with that, he walked away.
Reno and Rude followed, and they left Aeris’ house behind.
It had been a year, and Reno’s 20th birthday had just
passed. It seemed like yesterday he was a rookie in the Turks, and that he was the
professor’s experimental house boy. He wore a smirk to work, a sarcastic reply to any
questions and a frigid rebuff to emotion.
He was a Turk.
And now, the time had come, through all the blood, bullets and such, to fight a real
menace. A rebel group.
Reno was lazy, but he knew he was the best damn Turk he could be. He never saw the
professor after his induction into the Administrative Research Dept. of ShinRa, and he
didn’t desire to. The scars of what the bastard had done still hadn’t faded, and
he didn’t want to think about it anymore.
And he found himself sitting in his room, which he never enjoyed spending much time in
since it reminded him his old cell, getting ready for the mission that was due the next
morning.
It was late, night time. And he sat, looking out the window (which he always kept open),
staring at the stars.
There was a sharp rap on the door, and he looked up. Buzzing the intercom, he allowed
entrance. To his horror, the professor himself entered with his tattered lab coat.
Reno visibly shrank back. He knew there was nothing to be afraid of now…but still,
old fears don’t just vanish. The professor found the nearest chair and sat down,
amicably looking in Reno’s direction.
‘What do you want?’ he spat venomously, trying to sound controlled.
‘Information,’ he replied.
Reno gave him a strange look.
‘Information, about Aeris Gainesborough.’
Reno’s blood froze.
‘I understand that she was not abducted,’ he said in an irritated voice. He had
grown old since Reno had last seen him, and looked about 20 years aged.
‘No, sir. The…’
‘Don’t give me excuses,’ he replied.
‘If you don’t tell me what’s going on…I may have to request you for
experimentation again…,’ he warned, and then gave Reno the most disgusting smile
he’d ever seen, and before Reno could move, he leaned across and kissed him roughly.
‘Understand?’
Reno’s head drooped, but he nodded.
‘Good.’
With that, he got up and left.
A few minutes later, someone else knocked on the door.
Reno yelled at them to go away, but they came in anyway.
It was Rude. ‘Reno?’
‘Hmm?’ Reno mumbled from the tight ball he was curled into on the bed.
Rude recognised that position…that was the position he used when something had
happened. He risked his mask and went to sit over on the chair next to the bed.
Hesitantly, he placed his hand on Reno’s shoulder. Immediately he shook if off by
reflex, and Rude knew he would.
‘Reno, what’s wrong?’
‘Nothing. Go away.’
‘Reno…’
‘Go away.’
‘Usually I’m the silent one,’ Rude thought wryly.
‘Reno, turn around.’
No response.
He grabbed his shoulder, and with unexpected force, turned Reno to look at him. To his
great shock, his eyes were full of unshed tears of frustration. In the last three years,
Rude had seen Reno cry once.
‘Reno,’ he whispered, ‘tell me.’
He finally, the first one in his life in fact, let out a sob. He cowered against the wall,
and sobbed for a full five minutes before Rude intercepted again.
‘Pull yourself together!’
To Reno, instability was like a slap in the face. He immediately straightened, and stopped
sobbing, but it was one of the only times in his life, past present or future, that he
could not blink away the tears.
‘Tell me,’ he said again, quietly now.
So Reno told him. How the professor had threatened him about Tseng…and how he wanted
information. He left out the black mail threat however.
‘That’s it?’
Reno nodded. Out of anyone, Rude was perhaps the only person who could tell when Reno was
lying.
‘No, it’s not,’ he said sadly, boring holes through Reno with his dark
eyes.
‘I can’t say the rest…’ he started, but the tears came again, albeit
sobs which he harnessed.
Rude shook his head slowly…
‘If it will hinder your work, you should tell someone.’
He appealed to his work ethic side, which he knew was flawless to Reno.
So, of course, Reno took the bait, and thinking about it, finally nodded. If he had to
sacrifice his soul, his heart, his freedom…even his body, he wouldn’t sacrifice
his pride in his work and emotionless demeanor.
No one could steal his pride.
He told Rude - everything that had happened when the Turk was drugged, what the professor
had said, everything, not leaving anything out to make him unashamed.
And he confessed, at last, how lonely he was, how at least the professor wanted to touch
him and be with him, even if it was only for sordid, physical reasons of a dirty old man.
And Rude, did something Reno never expected.
He leaned across the way, and kissed him.
His eyes grew wide, and his tears flowed even more freely as some of his emotional
restraint evaporated.
Rude pushed him down onto the bed, gently kissing him over and over, as if he had been
dreaming about it. Reno closed his eyes, and almost silently whimpered, not knowing what
to do. All he could imagine was the professor’s slimy hands on him, his tainted
release into Reno’s body…
‘Rude,’ he rasped out sharply, ‘please…’
Rude silenced him, putting his fingers ever so gently to his lips. He kissed his forehead,
his lips, his entire face, before answering, ‘I won’t hurt you, Reno. I
won’t hurt you.’
He took his old charge, his friend, his ally and his work associate, into his arms, and
wanted to alleviate the pain so much it hurt.
‘You’re so beautiful,’ he whispered softly, shocking Reno to the depths of
his soul, ‘how could ever possibly think no one but the professor would want
you?’ he said softly, incredulously.
He was breathless and he felt Reno heave a deep breath of air in. His body pressed more
tightly against Rude’s for the slightest moment, but it made him sigh with absolute
ecstasy.
‘I’ve wanted to feel you beneath me for so long,’ he said so lightly that
Reno had thought he’d heard wrong.
This man…this confusing, strong, man…wanted him. No, it didn’t make sense.
His hands, gentle, and so tender it was frightening to Reno who had never felt anything
close to affection, needless mention desire, that he gasped as Rude’s gentle fingers
touched his face and ran through his fiery hair.
‘You’re so innocent, and yet you know more about suffering than I do,’ he
still whispered, closing his eyes as well and breathing into Reno’s hair.
Reno’s entire body stiffened, not knowing what to do, not knowing whether Rude would
realise he was defiled, and used, and worthless.
But he did realise that he was exulting in Rude’s lips, his voice, his touch, his
hands, everything about him that made him who he was, Reno seemed to drink in like a
divine heaven.
And Rude kissed his neck, so gently, and so lightly, that it astounded Reno he had also
killed people so easily as the way he was touching Reno right now.
‘Oh Reno,’ he said, on the verge of tears, the one thing that Reno was the most
afraid of, ‘I’ve wanted to feel you underneath my body, inside of me, and on top
of me. I’ve wanted to, since the day I saw you run away, drown in your eyes…God,
you’re so beautiful.’
Reno let out a sharp gasp when he saw that Rude had let one tear drop.
‘Reno…my Reno,’ he breathed raggedly, ‘touch me.’
So Reno did, and he let his trembling fingers trace Rude’s face. He let long,
articulate fingers delicately, and so lightly, trace the only man he’d ever known to
be some sort of friend, and the caretaker, closed his eyes and sighed, leaning into that
ecstatic touch.
‘You’re so beautiful,’ he sighed, moaning softly in the same breath. But as
Rude began to move lower to his chest, though still so gently it hurt to watch, Reno
dropped his hand.
Finally, he found his voice, ‘No..Rude. No. I’m not. I’m
scarred…I’m a broken man,’ and correcting himself with a bit of a bitter
laugh, ‘no, I’m a broken, nameless boy.’
‘No,’ Rude cringed visibly and took Reno’s body into his arms, pressing him
against his own body like a shield, ‘you’re…something I can’t
describe.’
‘If I find the professor, I’ll tear his face off and kill him with my bare
hands.’
Reno gaped at him, because he was serious. Rude was never sarcastic. He always meant every
word he said, and to Reno’s astonishment, he meant this more than anything.
‘When I saw you, Reno,’ he began, ‘when I saw you in pain, when you stabbed
yourself, you stabbed me. When you were burned, I wanted to kill Tseng. I wanted to take
every scar you’ve ever had to endure and put it onto myself.’
He kissed him again, ‘Oh Reno,’ he breathed, ‘I need you…please,
please say you need me, that you want me.’
Reno looked up into pleading brown eyes, wondering why he hadn’t realised… He
was in love.
He had always been in love. The day, when Rude had given him a name, when he took care of
his wounds… and he realised most of all… the day Rude refused to kill him, was
not because he was a heartless monster. He couldn’t kill him because he …
‘Rude,’ he said, his green eyes full of fear… ‘I…
No. No, this man, this angel of his, of which he once called demon, deserved better.
‘I…have to go.’ He pulled himself from under his embrace, and ran.
