Proof That Nick Is An Alien Clone

Welcome ladies and geraniums. If you were wondering, as I have, on the authenticity of the one they call Nick, then you've come to the right place, my friends. I've done some intensive research on the Boy I now call 'Turd'. I spoke with several scientists in conjuction with alien saucer people and I've put together a time line of the several "Nick's" we've all been fooled by. That is, all but I. After several mistakes and a few OK clones, they settled on one final clone. The one I could never love like I had loved the real Nick.... and clone number 4.

Pre - cloned Nick.

*sniff sniff* This was the Nick I had planned on marrying. *sniff sniff* But all those dreams were trashed when they abducted him!!!! WHY?!!!!!!!!!! WHY ME?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If you would like to read more about the end of a wonderful relationship that never began, click here, I mean here.

CLONE NUMBER 1



They called this the "I don't know what we were thinking" clone. It was soon destoyed.

CLONE NUMBER 2



This clone lived as far as 2 photo shoots until it's lungs gave out during the Quit Playin' Games chair dance. It seems endurance wasn't something they thought about when preparing the clone. Fools.

CLONE NUMBER 3



The "feminine-looking" clone. This one was said to be an experiment to see how the ladies reacted. The response was exactly as I thought - no one noticed.

CLONE NUMBER 4



The "sexy Nick" clone. I would have taken him over my beloved pre-clone Nick. In fact, I did. But they soon took him away and broke my little heart.

CLONE NUMBER 5



The "mistake". Every scientist makes one. This one was burned and it's ashes flushed down the toilet.

CLONE NUMBER 6



The Semi-normal clone. I was told this one would have been the final clone until they noticed you could see his roots from the brown wig they dyed and used as hair.

CLONE NUMBER 7



The "Who are they trying to fool?!!!" clone. This one was made just in time for their SNL appearance. After watching the show, they quickly reabducted him and destroyed the clone that looked nothing like the boy they were supposed to be duplicating. The man responsible was fired and will never work in this town again.

CLONE NUMBER 8



The "Normal" clone. This one should have remained, but the big boss was not happy with it. So it is no longer.

CLONE NUMBER 9



THE LAST AND FINAL CLONE

POST CLONE
(this is what happens to some clones after time)

And that ladies and gentlemens is the story of how 'Turd' was born. He actually looks kind of sexy in that picture on the right ......Did those words just come out of my mouth?!!AUGH!!!!!!!!........... OH HOW I LOVED CLONE NUMBER 4!!! But he still cannot compare to the real Nicky. We could've been in love!!! To read more about the love that never was and never will be and the heartache that comes with it, click on the face ¤¿¤