Mood: chillin'
Greetings in the Name of Our Lord Jesus Christ
I would like to share somethings in general & what I received from the prayer walk on Nov. 30.
Firstly I want to share that this has been a very difficult time for me. Not the walk, but my life & what I have been going through. I was laid off from a job I had for 5 years & was unemployed for 6wks. - just as my EI was to start I got a job doing well file conversion. However 6 wks after I started that the client company canceled the evening shift that I was on. In short, it did affect my collecting EI again & now am waiting to be reinstated in that. I don’t have a job & no money to pay for rent or groceries. When I was first laid off from this second job I flipped out, to say the least & for a few days was extremely depressed. Couple of weeks ago my fiancee did send me some money to help out. That was a blessing & a struggle & humbling for me. I have always been a very self-efficient person & have chosen to work. Even though I have plugged Heavenly Father for some kind of insight to this time period in my life I have received none. I do have some peace in my life, I am thankful for my friend & landlady who waits for when I do receive some money to put towards the low rent she has blessed me with. This is walking through the valley of shadows…is it death in some ways it is. Upon chatting with some close friends I have found that they are also in similar circumstances. So God what is going on ! It is to say the least an interesting scenario. I have purchased a few small gifts for family & even though I should be dismal about the whole season I am not. I have lots of cloth and creative ideas that I am able to make presents from.
WHY am I sharing this…. A- for prayer - I have applied for quite a few positions & have not received any yet.. I have recieved 2 responses - one at the post office & they say if I get the on call postal clerk, I may not be called & if I work I wouldn’t get piad till mid Jan…. the second for a seismic company, but after the interview I was contacted back that they did not have enough work themselves to hire me. I would like to pay my basics but most importantly I would like to be able to work.
B To share about determination… not that I have it in myself , I am a whimp & have been bugging God relentlessly… it is through Him, I can take no credit, for His lifting me up to push forward on what He has asked me to do. I could have chucked the walk - what purpose is it achieving anyways… how we can be plagued with many thoughts like that. But when He says lift your head & look beyond - one must. Look beyond to what I don’t know at this point nor do I see anything yet… concrete that is. But the walk is not worthless. He will so something… smiling.
THE PRAYER WALK OF NOV 30
Did I debate to whether I was going out to do it seeing it was -10oC or so. No. When I was involved with the St. Luke’s Jericho walk we did it when it was -30 & storming. And yes it was up hill both ways… sorry couldn’t but chuckle. So yesterday was not really anything too difficult. I asked Him what He wanted to talk about that day. It wasn’t a hugely profound conversation nor lengthy. But He spoke about grieving. Brentview you are going through a grieving process. Yes you are pushing forward to things ahead but in the movement there is also grief. Grief in those who have attended Brentview for years & now a dramatic change is coming. You will not be the same ever again. There is no turning back. But how things will unfold from this point forward is determined in how you handle the grief among you & how you pursue the Lord. For those who are excitedly running after the Lord in the concept that He will move on Brentview that is great, but do not forget those who are grieving. Look upon them & ask Father - What can I do to encourage them to either catch Your vision or to look forward to Your move. Let us not patronize them but smile upon them with love & draw them to see Him in our midst.
To whether one has the doors of the church open on Christmas day or not; is not an option nor should be a subject of debate. I will leave behind my theory platform & state this….. We as a body of believers are representatives of the Lord Jesus Christ among the world around us. How does it appear if we close our doors & say ‘sorry we won’t be celebrating the Lord’s birth-day with you, you’re on your own.’ Harsh words perhaps - a jolt of hey look at our actions & the consequences. For those who may or may not come, will seek out other places of worship - I am not saying that they will be Godly places.. but there are other institutes that present themselves as ‘Christians’ & are distant from Father’s hearts. Is there grief in this… yes… Christ’s grief.. for as our brothers in Yahweh, the Jews, have done this before & we are now following in their footsteps and have slowly closed off our faith in God to the world. Yes… this is a thought to consider… whether it is true on the whole, perhaps not. But look inward. Have we… or have we not. Where else is the grief in this… for those who do not have a family on that day to be with.. where do they go.. Can they come to church if even for an hour & celebrate the love & excitement of what Father has given to us so that we might live. No. They will be alone. Is it a success if only 20 come that day. Would Christ’s death been a success if only 1 person came to know Him.. yes. For success should not be thought of or measured against worldly standards.
There is another point I would like to bring forward. First in a form of a question. Do you know who is outside your doors & what they are doing?
As I started my walk I chatted with the fellow who is going to put up another section of the fence around the new parking lot.. yes it will make the walk more difficult.. but that is beside the point & something that is easily overcome…. I chatted a little with him at the beginning, then proceeded to walk. Laurel joined me a few minutes later. Her & I walked & talked while he worked trying to break up the frozen ground so that he could plant the posts to hold the fence boards. Then the last steps came & I went to my van & contemplated the rest of my time. I backed up & was about to drive away. Heavenly Father said… he needs a hot coffee… yes, my first thought was, why doesn’t the people inside the church take care of that. God’s reply was - they don’t know . So I drove to Wendys & got coffee for the landscape fellow. When I came back I asked the man if he was ready for coffee… a surprised look came first then a big smile as he replied sure could use one. I handed him the coffee & wished him a good day. Do I want kudos for that… no not really… what I want is to learn from that.. who is outside my door who Father wants me to touch today. Yes I can stay inside where it is nice & warm & fill my thoughts with what I deem very important.. but what does Father deem important. Where are His thoughts. Is the fellow doing the landscaping a Christian.. I don’t know.. if not will he come to the Lord because I gave him coffee… don’t know that either… the thing is I saw him, he was outside my door, he was working in the cold, & Father said warm him… so I did. There could be nothing more to that. Like there could be nothing to the smile you give the person next to you in that lengthy seasonal line or the ‘thank you I appreciate your being here to serve me’ to that clerk who has been harassed by the hordes of unpleasant shoppers. Simple things.. His way.
Smile…
I am off now to see if EI will reconsider the 6 week waiting period they have put on my - reactivated claim & honour their word that it would only take 24 hours due to the first layoff. Plus I have some studying & sewing to do.
Bless you
Candace