Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)

momblocker

?noun

a dad having a strong need to control his wife.

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[Origin: March 12, 2007 - Amy Sohn]

Today's new made up word is Momblocker.  It's courtesy of  Amy Sohn who will show it off in next weeks New York Magazine article.  In short a momblocker is a control-freak dad.  Amy defines them as the men you see chastising their wives for not dressing the baby warmly enough or using only the three-point latch in the stroller, not the five. They insist on pushing the stroller on family outings, they crowd their kids on the jungle gyms, they spend hours online researching high chairs. Somewhere along the line, Mom gave up her automatic veto power?and Dad seized it for himself.  As proof that these dads exist she interviewed Greg Allen of Daddytypes who actually does spend hours online researching high chairs.  Sohn notes that Allen became a de facto momblocker during the first three months of his daughter?s life, when he and his wife stayed home to care for her. ?We decided that I would do EBB?everything but breast-feeding?to help her out. It was so much easier for her to let me change the diaper and give the kid a bath than to do it herself and risk screwing up. It took a lot of effort for her finally to say, ?I need to learn how to do this now.'   

Coincidently, (amazingly?) Allen was also quoted last year to discuss the opposite theory in a Time article titled ?When Moms are Gatekeepers?. (These are moms who ask for help but tell hubby exactly how they want it done).  In it Po Bronson quotes him as saying,  A pattern is established in childbirth and breastfeeding that can be hard to break, The mother becomes the expert first, then cringes as she watches her husband awkwardly stumble through his learning curve. As she hears the cries of her fragile infant, she can't help but interrupt.  

As for the new word? Amy actually thought of it in response to this same Time piece, where Bronson states, As many as a quarter of all new moms are actually blocking their husbands' attempts at involved fathering.  

Oh and another thing about that sentence. A quarter of all new moms? I'd like to know where that statistic come from.... but if it were true, 75% of us must be Momblockers.

Thanks Rebeldad for spotting this absolutely hilarious Steven Colbert video featuring Eamon Stookesberry of the Austin At-Home Dads.  It's a  Colbert Report Exclusive Report: Stay at Home Dads - part of a dangerous movement that's threatening  the American way of life. No doubt Eamon, (if that is his real name) and his wife were very good sports to agree to be a part of Colbert Nation.

While cruising for stories  I came across this headline from the Baltimore Sun: In primate colony, titi monkey dads take on the role of Mr. Mom.  I can't interview these monkeys on what they thought of the headline but the story is worth mentioning. Seems that the folks at the California National Primate Research Center  found that mom monkeys are pretty rough on their kids and dad is more than happy to take over. In the story UC Davis psychology professor  Karen Bales, says,  In most monogamous species, the dads are really good. It's just taken to an extreme in titi monkeys because the moms are kind of bad, sometimes  you watch a titi monkey mom and you feel like she doesn't like her babies." Titi babies tend to ride draped across a parent's shoulders, and when mom wants the kid off her back, her favorite strategy for shifting responsibility [to dad]  is to make the baby cry.   

A new Digg for Dads  - Don Leister of DadStaysHome.com fame has turned his main page into sort of a  Digg for Dads. He's done great with his dads forum, and with the dads site clogging the blogosphere It's a great idea.  If you would like to submit your blog send him a line with your feed.

 An alert reader, found this excellent piece in the Daily Telegraph by British reporter Sarah Ebner on male nannies or mannys.  She interviews Holly Peterson's for her book The Manny due for American release in a few months. Peterson (who has 3 children) notes "Boys play differently to women, the nanny is more of a comforter, while the manny is a 'throw me across the room' kind of guy. They fool around, play football and are happy to run around and around the park.''  Of course we knew this all along, in an old At-Home Dad Newsletter article I wrote 10 years ago  daycare daddy John Wise said "The only structure around here is snack, nap and lunch time." Wise calls it the "rhythm method". "Why would you want to break that rhythm by forcing another activity when everything is fine. If things are running smoothly we will continue with it as long as the kids are enjoying it." 2 other day care daddies I interviewed for the same story had a similar "let the kids run around" style.  

We can thank Britney Spears (and her Fed-ex) for sticking this whole manny issue into the limelight last year,  but an  interesting stat may reflect the true public opionion. In an online survey from a Tinies Nanny Agency quiz it was revealed that four fifths of mothers would feel threatened by a female nanny, but only half of the dads felt the same threat. 

Posting on the manny story in the message board last week "Carlos" wrote:

 "Careers have been more important for a long time.. take a look at the before school program that includes breakfast.  or the after school "latch key" programs.  it seems that most of America would rather "farm out" time with their kids.  The saddest part is that most of the time the second parent is working and earns just enough to pay for the new cars in the driveway, and day care expenses.  I even know a few stay at home parents that send their kids to day care 5 days a week....(so they can have a break)....does that qualify as a stay a home parent?  or is it skipping out on the kids and perusing laziness as a career?     I think it's about time that The "Manny" gets some attention. I'm waiting for the debut of "Super Manny"....