With so many fresh faced wanna be 'divas' out on todays pop scene, how do they compare to the actual divas from our Generation X past? Melanie Burkes compares the concert stylings of several aspiring divas to that of an established diva in her own right, Madonna.

I could not help myself. It was kind of like when you have eaten a huge meal: an appetizer, main course, and everything. You knew that you should not have eaten that juicy piece of chocolate cake, but it was calling your name and you just could not help yourself. Or, it's Sunday afternoon and you have a ton of work to do for the next day, however lo and behold, the TBS Superstation runs a John Hughes marathon. How can you NOT watch Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, and Pretty in Pink for the umpteenth time?! That's a level of self-control that I just do not possess. Basically that's what happened when I heard about Britney Spears' HBO Concert in October. I just could not help myself. I had to watch it, launch a comparison, and share some of my thoughts with you.

Ordinarily, a comparison of concerts would be a daunting task. But thanks to cable and broadcast television, my job has become that much easier. With much build-up and fanfare (including promos in which she was dressed in Elvis' classic polyester jumpsuit), on November 18th, HBO presented a live broadcast of Britney Spear's tour. Britney Live broadcast from the city of sin: Las Vegas. In order to keep her inevitable comparison to Madonna alive and well, the cable network re-broadcast a concert from Madonna's Drowned World Tour. This concert was in her hometown in Auburn Hills, Michigan and had previously aired back in August 2001. Not to feel left out, the following day NBC aired a taped version of Jennifer Lopez's first concert from Puerto Rico. Hmmmmm . . . do I think that the airing of all these concerts in quick succession was just a fluke? Of course not! It was every armchair critic's dream, it was an opportunity for comparison and I had just the free time to take up the challenge.

First, what are our baselines of comparison? Well, because we are dealing with three women who are lauded as pop/dance divas, we will focus on the big three: costumes changes, dance moves, and audacity. I hope you weren't expecting something as highbrow as actual musical comparisons. It's not that type of column. If you want an intellectual discussion on the music prowess of all three women, go buy a copy of Rolling Stone. If you want a superficial but ultimately entertaining account of their antics then keep reading.

Contestant Number One: Britney Spears. Britney Live was a sight to behold. Category One: Costumes. Although the concert was only approximately 80 minutes long, Britney managed to change clothes 8 times. That's an outfit ratio of one outfit for every 10 minutes of viewing. There was the sexy vampy look (outfit #1), there was the cute innocent ballerina (outfit #3), there was the voluptuous gown for the slow ballad (outfit #6) and of course the sexy, cowboy, strip-dancer getup (outfit #8). That's a whole lotta velcro.

Category Two: Dancing. Well, although Britney can shake it like a white girl, she wasn't dancing as much as I expected. Perhaps it would have interfered with all the wardrobe changes. However, when she did decide to get down, it was something that you didn't want to miss. She's young, she's full of energy, and it shows when she's jumping, swerving, gliding, and prancing up and down on the stage (ahhh to be 20 again!)

Category Three: Audacity. There is no question that Ms. Spears is a front-runner in this category. The piece de la resistance of her show was her encore. Billed as an event that "brought the outdoors inside," Britney appears in a lone spotlight, under a rain shower. Yup - it was raining on stage (how they avoided electrocution, I'll never know). Taking her first hit, "Hit Me Baby One More Time," Brit flipped the script and turned it into a slow, grinding number. Prancing around on the stage, Ms. Spears flaunted her tightly toned tummy, and other body parts to the driving beat. Let's just say that the surprisingly large number of men in the audience got what they came for (and then some.) Total tally: on the diva ratio of 1 to 10 - I give her an 8.75. She may be young, but she's not stupid. Although she is just coming into the whole diva mode, she's off to a ferocious start. She's got a lot to live up to with her competition, but the audacity with which she performed her encore gave her several extra points. I haven't seen anything like that since Madonna rolled around the stage in her underwear at the first MTV video music awards.

Contestant Number Two: Jennifer Lopez. This concert was only an hour long,in fact with commercials, I think it had an actual running time of 46 minutes. So I had a lot less to work with, but I still think the comparison holds. Despite the short actual running time of her concert J.Lo managed to switch outfits 6 times, for an outfit ratio of one outfit every 7.67 minutes (besting Britney by over 2 minutes - come on Brit - you're lagging behind!). J.Lo went one step further in her changes, in that she added several hairpieces and wigs to her ensemble. Although all the outfits were similar in one respect, they highlighted her well-toned rear end, and her flat stomach (if I looked like that, I would do it also).

Category Two: Dance Moves. Like Britney, Jennifer was surrounded by a bevy of dancers that pranced around the stage behind her. Although I must admit, I was a little distracted as I spent most of the concert watching her dancers and trying to figure out whether her husband was still dancing for her. In comparison to Britney, Jennifer danced a little more, and it was great. But that was to be expected...let's not forget Ms. Lopez's humble beginnings as a Fly Girl.

Category Three: Audacity. I must say, in this category, Ms. Lopez was a little lacking. She did sing from a swing with the name "J.Lo" imprinted on it while warbling a remake of Diana Ross. It was interesting, but not as enticing as the rain shower. Total tally: 7.25. The outfits were great, the dancing (when she did it) was exciting, but the short time of the concert hurt. Perhaps if she would have flown over the audience, or got someone to sprinkle some water on her, she would have won hands down.

Contestant Number Three: Madonna. You do realize that we're talking apples and oranges here when we compare Madonna with Britney and Jennifer Lopez? But because all of the media unhesitatingly does this comparison, so will I. First of all, Madonna (as usual) does the antithesis of all that we expect or want her to do. Category One: Costume Changes. First, her concert was broadcast as a theatrical piece in four acts (punk, geisha, Spanish diva, and cowboy). That means four major costume changes, for an almost two hour concert. That's only one outfit every 20-30 minutes. Although to give credit where credit is due, many of the costumes were designed by Jean-Paul Gaultier and that's gotta be worth something.

Category Two: Dance Moves. As for the dancing, well I didn't tune in expecting to see the kind of aerobic endeavors that she performed in her Blond Ambition Tour circa 1990, so I wasn't disappointed. Madonna did a little bootie shaken' but on the whole - she left that up to her younger, more virile, and more flexible dancers. But hey, I'm not mad at her. If I looked that good at 42, after having two children, I wouldn't be giving a concert in the first place. She is the reigning dance queen, so I am going to cut her some slack.

Category Three: Audacity. Madonna wins hands down. She didn't do anything that her fans or her audience wanted or expected, and she got away with it. Madonna didn't perform any of her classics. We did not hear "Like a Virgin," "Papa Don't Preach," "Vogue," "Express Yourself," or any of the other songs that we associate with Madonna and that we grew up on. We heard her new songs and just about all of them (She did throw us a bone though and sang "Holiday," towards the end of the concert.) Yet, her concert was sold out in just about every city, and folks were shelling out thousands of dollars to catch her in what many believe is her last outing. In the end, the concert was futuristic, and it was different, and it was, well...Madonna. Total Tally: 10 (come on, I am a child of the 80s and part of Generation X, what did you expect?).

Rationale: Despite attempts to do so, it's really unfair to compare any of these newer artists to Madonna. ‘Miss M' was shakin' her butt and prancing around the stage in her underwear before Britney was in pre-school and before J.Lo was a fly girl. Everything that happens now, falls into the "been there, done that" category for Ms. Ciccone (Ritchie?). ‘Miss M' was a trailblazer, end of story. So after all that she has accomplished, how do you follow something like that? Well there's no easy answer. The advice that I would give Britney and J.Lo is that they need to find their own trail, or get off the course.

Melanie Burkes is a twenty something corporate attorney in Washington, D.C. Much to the chagrin of her parents and all of the banks holding her student loans, Melanie plans on quitting her job as a lawyer as soon as possible, and shall strike out for the wealth of riches that awaits her in the broadcast journalism field. In her spare time, Melanie likes to read current literature, prepare meals for her friends, and plots the overthrow of her current employer.

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