THE GOPSTOPPER PRESS

Full coverage on 4 fun years of unkept promises, fascism, and illegitimacy!

MEET BUSH'S TOP MEN:

Gary Bauer: (on Jews)"...I disagree with the theology of many groups that I address; Jews, for example, who do not accept Jesus, or atheists."

John Ashcroft: soon to be AG? (on Confederates) "We've all got to stand up and speak in this respect or else we'll be taught that these people were giving their lives, subscribing their sacred fortunes and their honor to some perverted agenda."

Dick Cheney, VP, (On gays) "Gay lifestyle is incompatible with the military."

George Pataki, NY Gub (On DWIs) "I guess that qualifies you to be President of the United States then."

BUSH MAY EMERGE AS ONE OF THE MOST HATED U.S. PRESIDENTS SINCE NIXON!

The expectation of the D.C. protest has now surpassed 750,000, with rumors past a million. Well over the amount of people who protested at Nixon's 1972 Inaug, and much more than the rally held in opposition to the Serbian Dictator Slobodan Milosevic earlier this year. 12/26Story

HERE'S WHY 3 OF THE 5 SUPREME COURT JUSTICES RULED IN FAVOR OF BUSH:

Sandra Day O' Connor said "this is terrible" when Florida was first ruled for Gore. If Bush won, Sandra would do what she wants to do most, retire. If Gore won, she wouldn't want to retire and let a democratic president put a new member in her place, so she would have to sit on the bench for another 4 years.

Antonin Scalia said for himself that he would resign if Gore won the presidency. However, he would prefer if Bush won, so he could become the Chief Justice when Willian Renhquist stepped down.

Willian Renhquist , for the same reason as O'Connor, would want to stick around longer if Gore won, and would not want a democratic-appointed justice to take his place.