THE DAILY TRAVESTY | The Law of Fives
The Daily Travesty
 
17 May 2000                Email
Vol. 1, Issue 86            On the Web
 
Okay, we admit it, the rumors are true.  No, not the ones that B.C. is working secretly to sabotage the utterly blasphemous and misguided production of the upcoming live-action Lord of the Rings movie-- that's still under investigation.  However, it is now confirmable that we are contemplating a new name for The Daily Travesty.  Hence we are turning it into a contest, wherein all readers may submit ideas, and the winner shall receive... well... nothing special.  We really can't afford a nice prize.  But you will get your name announced and the satisfaction of knowing that your smart-assed idea was better than everyone else's.  Please email your entries to the editor.
 

 
The Inside Story!
 
THE LAW OF FIVES
 
The Law of Fives is one of the oldest Erisian Mysterees.  It was first revealed to Good Lord Omar and is one of the great contributions to come from The Hidden Temple of the Happy Jesus.
 
POEE [The PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF ERIS ESOTERIC] subscribes to the Law of Fives of Omar's sect.  And POEE also recognizes the Holy 23 (2+3=5) that is incorporated by Episkopos Dr. Mordecai Malignatius, KNS, into his Discordian sect, the Ancient Illuminated Seers of Bavaria.
 
The Law of Fives states simply that: ALL THINGS HAPPEN IN FIVES, OR ARE DIVISIBLES BY OR ARE MULTIPLES OF FIVE, OR ARE SOMEHOW DIRECTLY OR INDIRECTLY APPROPRIATE TO 5.
 
The Law of Fives is never wrong.
 
In the Erisian Archives is an old memo from Omar to Mal-2: "I find the Law of Fives to be more and more manifest the harder I look."
 

 
        There are trivial truths and there are great truths.
        The opposite of a trivial truth is plainly false.  The
        opposite of the great truth is also true.
                             --Neils Bohr