THE DAILY TRAVESTY | Hello From Ft. Jackson
The Daily Travesty
 
28 June 2000            email
Vol. 1, Issue 109       on the web
 
 
The human brain evidently operates on some variation of the famous principle enunciated in The Hunting of the Snark: "What I tell you three times is true."
                                                -Norbert Weiner, Cybernetics
 

 
I am printing the following for three reasons:
 
1. the author suggested I do so.
 
3. many subscribers will find it very amusing.
 
5. all humor aside, it is thought provoking.
 
 
A Letter From Sarah Skyrm to the Editor
 
Sarah departed about a week ago for Basic Training at Fort Jackson, South Carolina, after impulsively joining the Army last month.
 
June 18, 2000
 
Hey-- it's my third day of Basic Training-- and I am still alive-- it's hard!  I do push-ups out the ass everyday, and I march for hours-- and ahhh... I got in trouble today too.  I had to push for like half an hour by myself in the gravel.  Oh and my drill sergeant called me a crack head!!  Oh well-- Basic is just a game, and I plan on winning.
 
Mike Y. told me about blanket parties, and a whole rack of stuff people were gonna do-- well... this is the year 2000, and everyone's "sensitive" now.  That stuff you always hear about just doesn't happen anymore.  Plus we have fire guard all night who watch us.  I am on fire guard right now.  It's 3:30 AM exactly, and my watch is until 5:30 AM-- when I wake everyone up.  This is why I have time to write you a letter.
 
Oh, and everything sucks here-- it's like prison: group showers, 7 minutes to eat, no phone calls, bunk beds without rails (and I sleep on the top mind you) and 63 people per room.  I was sick my first day, because I was given 5 vaccines in one day (my arms got swollen) and made to do pushups and stay awake all night-- I got really stressed.  My body is getting used to it now though.
 
So yes, I am still alive (surprising), and I am gonna graduate, and get out.  I do cry everyday.  I miss home sooo much, and all my friends.  I miss my Jason too, but he promised me he'd wait for me.
 
P.S.  I cry everyday-- no lie-- I don't know if I'm gonna go nuts or not yet-- you know me-- I hate authority.  This place is really breaking me down and I thought it was impossible.  If I go home brainwashed-- remind me of who I am!
 
++
 
you can't email Sarah where she is.
 

anyone know how I can add different colors to the Outlook HTML?   I want to use orange.