May 18, 1914
The Calverts set sail for Alaska the next morning at eleven o’clock. Rose approached the ship nervously, trying to hide her fear from Robert. She hadn’t set foot on a ship, or even been near the ocean, since the Carpathia had docked in New York in April of 1912. Despite all of the opportunities she had had to visit the beach, especially when she was living in New York and San Francisco, Rose had studiously avoided the sea. She had glimpsed it a few times in San Francisco, but had never visited the beach itself.
Now, as they rode toward the pier in a cab, Rose looked out a window, straining for a glimpse of the ship, or of the sea. She had never been near the Pacific Ocean before. The cab moved slowly amongst the crowds of people at the docks, the driver swearing at those who blocked his path. Rose tuned him out, more concerned with other things.
She could smell the ocean as they got closer. It didn’t smell much different from the Atlantic—salt water, fish, sea air. Tensing, Rose remembered the last time she had been near an ocean—the crowds of people waiting for word on friends and relatives, as well as shouting reporters and curiosity seekers; the pouring rain; Cal, still angry, pulling her along to a carriage.
Rose looked up as the carriage came to a stop and the passengers got out. The sky was overcast this morning, in stark contrast to the sunlight of the day before, and the water was choppy. She looked at it nervously, wondering if it was a bad omen, as the cabby handed them their bags and accepted his money.
"Well, this is the ship," Robert told her, gesturing to the vessel before them. "Not as fancy as the Mauritania, but it’ll get us where we’re going."
Rose looked at the ship, half-expecting to see an enormous, shining new ocean liner, surrounded by crowds of steerage passengers and members of high society. Instead, she saw a much smaller ship, still in good condition but obviously well-used. This ship had made the journey to Alaska many times.
There were a few wealthy-looking people near the ship, mostly travelers visiting Alaska for fun, but most appeared to be workers, or adventurers like themselves. Alaska was mostly wild and unsettled, and attracted people looking for adventure, or escaping from the law, or seeking their fortunes.
Robert handed her a ticket, and they got in line for the health inspection. They would be traveling in steerage. Even on a well-used ship, first or second class was too expensive for them.
After passing through the health inspection, which Rose likened to being inspected for sale, they boarded the ship. Steerage on this ship was much like that on any other—dark, crowded, and none too clean. Looking around, Rose couldn’t help but compare it with steerage on the Titanic, which had seemed much better, at least initially. Of course, after the Titanic had struck an iceberg, steerage had become a deathtrap, but before then it had been a fairly pleasant traveling area.
They moved through the dark, narrow halls, searching for their room. Rose saw several locked gates, and shuddered, remembering being locked behind a gate on the Titanic as the water rose, nearly drowning herself and Jack before he had managed to unlock the gate.
Robert noticed. "What’s wrong?" he asked.
Rose shrugged. "Nothing. Just a bit chilly, is all."
"All right." Robert looked like he didn’t quite believe her, but didn’t comment. A rat darted down the hall, deftly avoiding them and several other passengers, and he jumped.
Rose laughed. "Are you afraid of rats?"
"No. It just startled me, is all."
"Uh-huh." They had reached their room, and slipped inside. Rose looked around at the narrow bunks and bare wooden floor, glad to see that at least they had a porthole in their room. They would be able to see out.
"Home sweet home," she mumbled, tossing her bags on the upper bunk. It would be just the two of them in the room, since there were only two narrow beds.
"For a week and a half, at least," Robert replied, setting his own belongings on the floor. "Hardly ideal for newlyweds, but I’m sure we’ll survive."
"It’ll take a bit of imagination, but I’m sure we can work it out," Rose commented, looking out the porthole. The ship was getting ready to leave.
"Why don’t we go up on deck and watch the ship set sail?" Robert asked her, joining her at the porthole.
"Watch? Why?"
"Because it’s fun! Don’t tell me you’ve never watched a ship set sail before. You’ve been on the Mauritania."
"Yes, but I didn’t get to watch it leave."
"Well, here’s your chance. Come on."
Robert grabbed her hand and almost dragged her from the room. He shut the door firmly behind him and headed for the deck, Rose following.
He’s right, Rose thought as they arrived on deck. People lined the railing, shouting and waving to those still on the shore. Rose pushed her way up to the railing, looking to see if she recognized anyone.
At first, she didn’t see anyone she knew. Then she saw a figure sitting in a wheelchair a short distance from the crowd, searching the faces of the passengers.
They caught sight of each other, and Rose waved, shouting. She wasn’t sure if Deborah could hear her over the din, but she called out anyway, grinning and waving, giving no sign of the trepidation she felt. Robert came up behind her, and she saw Will and the Hutchison’s chauffeur standing near Deborah. The two couples waved, shouting unintelligible greetings and good-byes to each other, as the ship began to move.
Rose looked out at the water as the ship started away from the shore. She remembered something that she had read, about the Titanic nearly colliding with another ship when it first set sail from Southampton, and watched anxiously, wondering if this ship would have similar problems. But there were no mishaps, and the ship slowly made its way away from land, leaving a trail of white foam in its wake.
*****
Despite the inclement weather, Rose insisted upon spending most of the day on deck. They went inside long enough to eat lunch and put on warm coats, and then went back out on deck.
Few people were about. The chilly, windy weather kept most people inside the ship, but Rose refused to go inside. She spent most of the afternoon walking around the deck, as far as she could, occasionally settling down but mostly standing at the railing, looking out to sea.
She had grown increasingly nervous as San Francisco had faded from view, leaving nothing around the ship but ocean. All afternoon, she walked the deck, staring out at the choppy waves.
Robert had humored her at first, but had soon grown exasperated with Rose’s desire to stay outside in the cold. He had finally left her to her own devices, but came back out to look for her when dinnertime approached and she still wasn’t back.
Rose was leaning against the railing, staring intently at the horizon, when he found her. She jumped, startled, as he stopped beside her.
"You know," he teased her, "it’s going to be several days before you can see Alaska."
"I know," Rose told him, still scanning the choppy sea.
"Then what are you looking for?" He peered out at the water, not seeing much of interest. The ship rocked slightly, moved by the waves.
"Icebergs," Rose told him, without thinking.
"Icebergs? What are you looking for icebergs for?"
"Nothing."
"There’s no icebergs down here. This part of the Pacific is too warm. We’re not that far from San Francisco."
"The Atlantic has icebergs."
"You mean like the one that sank the Titanic?"
Rose looked at him sharply. "Yes."
"I don’t think we need to worry. It’s spring now, and too warm for icebergs."
"It was spring when the Titanic sank, too. April 15, 1912."
"Yes, but this is May, and we’re in the Pacific, which is much warmer than the North Atlantic."
"And we’re headed for the Arctic, which is colder than either."
"Yes, but it’s still spring, and this captain is said to have twenty years of experience. Besides, this ship has made the journey many times without a problem. This isn’t a maiden voyage."
"When the Titanic sank, they said it was unsinkable. And that captain had twenty-six years of experience."
"And, according to the papers, no mishaps before that. Why are you so worried, anyway? You weren’t on the Titanic, were you?"
"No," Rose answered quickly. "I’ve never been on a ship before in my life." Then she realized her mistake.
"What about the Mauritania?"
"I forgot about that one."
"No, you didn’t." Once again, Robert proved himself to be uncomfortably perceptive. "You were on the Titanic, weren’t you?"
"No!" Rose glowered at him. "I have never been anywhere near that ship."
"That’s why you’re looking for icebergs in the Pacific Ocean."
Rose turned on him. "Fine!" she spat. "I was on the Titanic! Are you satisfied now? You’ve finally solved the mystery of Rose. She’s such a strange person because she survived that disaster! And before you ask why I haven’t talked about it before, think about how you would feel if you had been through such a tragedy, and lost people that you cared about!" She turned and stormed away, heading inside, before realizing how stupid that had sounded. Robert had lived through a disaster, and lost people that he cared about, when the earthquake had occurred in San Francisco in 1906. She turned to apologize, but he was nowhere to be found.
Dinner was strained. Rose and Robert exchanged polite small talk, unable to talk seriously in the crowded, noisy room. All around them, people scraped utensils against dishes, shouting, talking, and laughing. There weren’t many women on board, and Rose received several speculative looks before Robert took her arm possessively, showing possible competitors that she was taken.
They finally returned to their room. Several people had brought instruments, and there was music and dancing going on, just as there had been aboard the Titanic, but Rose had little interest in participating. Her fear of sailing again, combined with the strain of the argument between Robert and herself, had left her tired, and she had no desire to join the party.
They walked to their room in silence, Rose trying to think of what she should say to fix the mess she had made. When they got there, she turned to him.
"Robert, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have blown up like that. It’s just...I’ve been worried about sailing on a ship again—I haven’t set foot on one since the Titanic sank—and I guess I was looking for something to fight about."
He sighed and looked at her. "You know, Rose, I do know what it’s like to lose people I care about in a disaster. I think I would have understood if you had told me about the Titanic."
Rose crossed her arms over her chest. "I know. I...I just have trouble talking about it. It was a terrible tragedy, and I lost one of my few friends—my maid, Trudy—when that ship went down."
"Was any of your family lost?"
Rose shook her head. "No. The only family member who was on the ship with me was my mother. She was one of the first ones evacuated from the ship. My ex-fiancé was also there, and he survived."
"Much to your disappointment."
"I would never wish that kind of end upon anyone, not even him."
Robert nodded. "Did you lose anyone else?"
Rose hesitated, debating whether to tell him about Jack. After a moment, she decided against it. She still couldn’t talk about him.
"I knew some of the passengers who died, other members of society. It was so cold that night, and when the Carpathia arrived to rescue the survivors in the morning, there was ice all around. A lot of people froze to death." She shivered, remembering the bitterly cold water, remembering the ice that had formed in her wet hair, freezing it to the board that had saved her life. Most of all, she remembered the ice that had frozen her hand to Jack’s, the ice that she had had to break away so that she could keep her promise and survive.
"And that’s why you were on the lookout for icebergs."
Rose nodded. "If they had seen that iceberg sooner, the whole tragedy might have been prevented."
"I don’t think you could prevent it from happening again, Rose. Even if you do somehow spot an iceberg, the lookouts with their binoculars will no doubt see it first."
She looked at him. "On the Titanic, the lookouts didn’t have binoculars. They got lost somewhere after Southampton."
"Well, they have them now. I saw one of the lookouts with them while I was looking for you earlier. Another thing you should know is that the laws have been changed. There are enough lifeboats now for everyone. It’s required that there be space for everyone on board."
"I know. It was in the paper." She sighed. "Maybe I’m just being overly nervous. Most ships’ journeys end successfully."
"That’s right, they do. And this ship was built with Arctic journeys in mind. It’s been built to resist ice, just like that ship that went down to Antarctica a few years ago, the Discovery. It’s been to Alaska, and to Siberia, many times without a problem. This was the ship I traveled on the first time I went to Alaska."
"Was it really?" Rose looked at him, slightly less nervous now.
"It was. And it had no problems. In fact, we didn’t see a single iceberg the whole trip."
"Well...I guess I can try to relax," Rose told him. "There’s probably nothing I can do anyway. I’ll admit that being on a ship still makes me nervous, but I’ll try to settle down. I can’t make any promises, though."
"I couldn’t ask for more. Now, speaking of relaxing, do you want to go to that party out there, or would you rather stay here?"
"I think I’d rather stay here." Rose flopped down on the bottom bunk, wiggling against the wall. "I don’t know that I want to sleep right now, though."
Robert laughed and lay down beside her. It was a tight squeeze, but they managed. "I think we’ll fit...maybe."
Rose put her head on his shoulder. "I did say that we might have to use our imagination."