ROSE'S PAST
Chapter Three

1910

Fifteen-year-old Rose DeWitt Bukater stepped into her father's bedroom. These waves came so often now, Ruth had demanded he move into another room. She could no longer handle his constant coughing at night, in her own words. Rose stuffed the small package into the bottom of her handbag as she entered the house.

"I'll go to your mother now, child," Betsy whispered as she hurried off. Rose smiled and then quickly made her way up the stairs and into the small room her father had moved to.

"Hi, Daddy," she said, bending to kiss his cheek. He smiled weakly. "Happy Birthday!"

"A birthday it is, Rose, dear. But happy--" He coughed a gut wrenching cough and then continued, "It is not. Old age is bearing its ugly face upon me."

"Oh, Daddy!" Rose said, throwing her arms up in the air, "You're healthy as a horse!" Pain struck her as her eyes glittered down to her father once more, weak and near death on the soft bed. He chuckled. "I brought you your gift. It's not much, and mother will kill me if she finds out that I'm giving you this, but it is your forty-seventh birthday," Rose said, groping in her hand bag for the small package. She pulled it out and handed it to her father. As his arthritis-claimed fingers fumbled to unwrap the foil, Rose's eyes moved to the closed window.

"Daddy, why do you keep this room closed up like some dungeon? Open the window every now and then." He glanced up at his daughter as she moved across the room and flung the window open. She turned to find that her father had finally gotten the wrapping off from around his present.

"Chocolate, Rose? If your mother--"

"Forget Mother. I am tired of living by mother's regulations. Chocolate isn't going to kill you."

"True enough, Rose." He lifted a square to his lips and let it melt in his mouth. "It is...it's...mmm! Wonderful, Rose!" He smiled, chocolate coating his teeth. Rose giggled. "But there is something missing..." Rose frowned.

"What?"

"A kiss." He smiled. Rose bent and kissed her father's lips gently.

"I love you, Daddy."

"I love you too, Rose."

She smiled once more, then turned to go. But Joseph spoke up again, stopping her.

"Rose, please stay. There is something I must explain to you."

Rose turned back to him, worry leaping into her eyes. "What is it, Daddy?"

"Don’t look like that, now. Nothing is wrong. In fact, this is something I hope will make things better for you. Sit down here, dearest, and I will tell you. You must promise never to tell your mother. If she should find out, all my careful planning will be ruined."

"I will never tell her, Daddy, whatever it is. Now please, what are you trying to say?"

Joseph took a deep breath, then began his tale. "Do you remember several weeks ago, when I got that letter from my sister?" Rose just nodded. "Well, she has been having money problems. She wrote me hoping I could help her. I had to be honest, and tell her that we are having troubles of our own. Until I answered that letter, she didn’t know I am actually dying. I hadn’t the courage to tell her. Of course, she still has her problems, and through frequent correspondence, she and I have worked out a solution. My sister cannot work, so she asked her daughter to come in her place. At first I thought it was a horrid idea, having one of my own family working here as a servant. But my niece happily agreed. She came and interviewed for the job one day while you were at school. You know your mother has never liked my family, and since she has never gone with me to visit them, she didn’t recognize my niece. Since she doesn’t bear any resemblance to me, I think your mother will never even suspect. Just in case, your cousin used a false last name, one that she must now continue to use."

Rose looked up, understanding what her father was saying. Joseph smiled. "Yes, she will be coming very soon. She has stayed in town, with a friend of mine, since I could not afford to put her up in a hotel. Tomorrow, when your mother goes out on her errands, I will call Trudy and tell her she is welcome to come. That way, the two of you will have time to talk without being interrupted. I do hope that you will be friends, that you will have someone to turn to when I am gone. You have always been friendly with all of the servants, that much will not seem strange to your mother. But as I said, it must remain a secret that Trudy is your cousin, or your mother will send her away. I know she will."

Joseph seemed very upset by this prospect. Rose did her best to ease his mind, smiling gently. "It will be fine, Daddy. Mother will never have the chance to do that. Trudy will be here with me, just as you wish."

*****

Just as you wish. The words echoed through her head as Rose opened the door at the sound of a knock. A young woman, perhaps a bit older than Rose stood there, her hair pinned up in a bun. She had but one small bag.

"Come in, come in," Rose said, forcing enthusiasm into her voice. She opened the door wider and let Trudy enter.

"Thank you, Miss," she said, stepping through the door and gazing about the huge manor. Rose blushed. Her cousin calling her Miss seemed painfully odd.

"I'm glad you're here," Rose said, shutting the door as they stepped further into the large parlor. Both girls seemed at a loss for words as Rose led Trudy up the stairs to the attic where an extra cot had been placed against the wall beneath the window. "I'm sorry I cannot offer you a more comfortable living space, but mother would never allow you stay in one of the rooms," Rose said regretfully as Trudy laid her small bag on the cot. "The bathroom is down the stairs and is the second door on the right. I will show you, but I suppose there is someone who is rather anxious to see you," she said, turning to leave. "Follow me." Rose led Trudy back down the stairs and to the small room that Joseph was in.

"Ah, Trudy! My dear girl!" Joseph exclaimed as Rose cautiously opened the door, and Trudy stepped in.

"Uncle Joe!" Trudy exclaimed, dropping to her knees beside the bed. "It's so good to see you again!" She covered his pale face is a thousand kisses, Joseph laughing the entire time. Rose stood back, silently, listening for her mother's return.

"Rose, your mother is back," Betsy whispered in her ear, her arms still full of boxes. When would her mother realize they hadn't the money at that time to support her lavish spending?

"All right, Betsy. Thank you." Betsy nodded and hurried off. Rose could now hear her mother's bitter voice coming from the parlor downstairs. She sighed, then stepped into the room and approached Trudy. "Mother is back. I'm afraid you'll have to come back later," Rose said, gently placing her hand on Trudy's shoulder. Trudy looked back at her then stood and bent and kissed Joseph's forehead one more time. Rose had left the room and began down the hallway when she noticed Trudy wasn't behind her. She turned and saw her father whispering something to her. Trudy had somewhat of a pained look on her face when she hurried to join Rose, but neither said anything.

That night, as Rose lay in her bed, listening to her father's painful coughing coming from down the hall, she tried to imagine what he could have possibly said.

And, just as Rose began to drift off, there was a very soft knock at her door. She got out of bed and opened it, admitting Trudy into the room.

"I'm sorry, miss," she began in a tense whisper. "I couldn’t sleep, so I thought..."

"I understand, I’m glad you came." Rose rested a hand on her cousin’s shoulder. "Please don’t call me miss, except in front of my mother. I would much rather you called me by my name."

Trudy sighed, looking as relieved as Rose felt. "I’ll remember. Thank you."

The cousins sat down on Rose’s bed. She gazed intently into Trudy’s eyes, her seriousness very clear even in the near dark. "Please tell me, what was it my father said to you this afternoon?"

"I was wondering when you would ask me that. Your father asked me if...if I would please look out for you when he..."

Rose looked down, tears welling in her eyes. "I see. He must think it will happen soon then."

"Yes, it seems that way. I’m sorry, miss--Rose. He asked me, and I promised him. When my mother told me Uncle Joe was dying, I knew I had to come. For him and for you. It doesn’t seem that your mother likes anyone here, so don’t worry, I won’t take her ways personally."

Rose smiled weakly. "I’m glad. She can be very...difficult, to put it mildly. She values things rather than people. She will treat you well enough, though. She has never been truly cruel to one of the..."

"Servants. It’s all right to say the word, Rose. I’m not ashamed to be here. It’s where I belong."

"Yes, I think it is. I am glad you’re here. We will get to know each other in spite of my mother, I promise. I’m still sorry you have to sleep in the attic." Trudy turned on a light just in time to see Rose blushing with shame.

"It’s not that bad. Besides, it is where the other servants sleep, it wouldn’t be right if I were treated differently."

The pair tensed as they heard footsteps coming down the hall. Quickly, they faded, but nonetheless Trudy got up from the bed. "I had better be getting back up to my room now. I’ll see you in the morning, Rose."

"Yes, good night." Trudy left swiftly. Rose closed her door quietly, then turned out the lamp before getting back under her covers. She was asleep almost before her head reached the pillow.

When Rose awakened again, it was still very early in the morning. However, there was a great commotion in the house. From down the hall, Rose heard the unmistakable voice of her father’s doctor.

"Daddy..." she whispered weakly, while hurriedly putting on her robe. Then, she went out of her room and down the hall. The door to Joseph’s room was closed. She could hear him coughing, nearly gasping for breath. Betsy was there in the hall, her eyes rimmed with tears.

"The doctor just arrived a few minutes ago, child. He says that...that your dear father hasn’t got--" The look on Rose’s face silenced the maid, and she stood aside to allow Rose to enter her father’s room.

Rose knelt by his bedside, tears already forming in her eyes. "Daddy, are you going to be all right?"

Joseph turned to look at his daughter, seemingly forgetting the other two people in the room, both his wife and his doctor. "Rose, dearest, did I wake you? I’m sorry." He gently ran his fingers through her hair as she spoke again.

"It’s all right, Daddy. I would rather be here with you." From across the room, Ruth spoke up.

"Rose, stop this foolishness. Go back to bed. Immediately."

"Be quiet, Ruth." Joseph spoke in the strongest voice he’d used in a very long time. "And if you can’t hold your tongue, please leave the room. Right this minute."

Ruth got up, storming toward the door. "Fine." Her voice was incredibly cold. "Let one of the maids come watch over you, then."

Over the sound of the slamming door, and with a small smile playing around the corners of his lips, Joseph answered calmly, "That would be fine, dear." Joseph then asked his doctor to leave, for a few moments, so he could visit with Rose in private.

She moved to sit on the bed, and took her father’s hands. Through the tears that were now streaming down her cheeks, she asked, "It’s time for you to go now, isn’t it, Daddy?"

"Yes, my dearest, it is nearly my time. I am so glad you are here. There are things I must tell you." Rose said nothing, and Joseph went on. "You’ve known all along how much I love you. I have no doubt you’ll always remember that. Still, I wish I could stay with you, because..." Here, Joseph was forced to pause and catch his breath. "Because I dread leaving you alone with that horrible woman."

Joseph smiled sadly at his daughter’s surprise at hearing her mother spoken of in such a way, especially coming from him. "I loved her once, very much. But she is not the woman I married; she hasn’t been for a very long time. She and I will be having quite a discussion shortly, the last one I think we shall ever have. It shall be entirely about you. I will do the best I can to help you, I promise." Rose gazed at him, perplexed. "I know you don’t understand what I mean now. You will." Joseph squeezed his daughter’s hands, then went on. "There are so many things in your life that I won’t be here for, and I’m truly sorry, Rose. But even in death I will be watching over you. I give you my word."

Rose began to sob openly, and was barely able to speak. "Thank you, Daddy. I love you so much, and though I wish, for myself, that you could stay, it will be better if you don’t have to suffer anymore. I’m so sorry you’ve gone through so much!"

"It hasn’t been easy, that is true." Joseph’s voice was amazingly calm. "But don’t you see, my dearest Rose? I have endured this long because I have had you here with me." Rose’s tears completely overwhelmed her now, and Joseph drew her tenderly into his arms.

"Go ahead, cry as much as you need to, darling. I’m right here. What I’m trying to say to you is thank you. Thank you for taking care of me, thank you for loving me. I’ve cherished every moment we’ve had together, and I will miss you more than anyone else I’m leaving behind. I love you, Rose."

After several long moments, Rose’s tears subsided. She lifted her head to look directly into Joseph’s eyes. "I love you too, Daddy." He kissed her cheek very softly. "Now, since your mother has gone, go and get your cousin, please. I must say good-bye to her too."

"All right, Daddy." Rose left the room in a hurry, and returned very soon with Trudy at her side. They both knelt by his bedside, as Joseph looked on them lovingly.

"I’m so glad you two will have each other to talk to. Trudy has told you of the promise she made to me, hasn’t she, Rose?"

"Yes, Daddy." Her voice trembled as she answered. Joseph now turned his attention to his niece. "I want to thank you for coming here, even when you didn’t have to. My wife is a hard woman, she will have no kindness for you." "I did have to come, Uncle Joe. Rose needs me, and right now, you need me too. I will manage just fine, I’m sure Rose and I will be good friends."

Joseph gave a genuine smile now. "Yes, I have no doubt. Especially now that I see you here together. I have done the right thing, bringing you here, Trudy. I can see that now." Joseph’s eyes closed, as he was struck by a wave of pain, followed by his usual awful coughing. When he spoke again, his voice was extremely weak.

"I do think the doctor should come back now. I will see you both again, once more before it is my time. Go on to bed for now, if you can. It’s terribly early. I love you both."

They each kissed his cheek, then stood and left the room.

*****

Try as she might to fall back asleep, Rose spent the rest of the morning lying wide-awake in her bed. She tried to imagine life without her father. Would it be possible? Perhaps his death would somehow soften Ruth, and she would change. Rose knew that without him, there would be another void inside her. Already, a strong, painful void filled one part of her heart from never having had a true mother, and then, with her father's death, another would flood into her.

Rose sat up as the sun began to inch over the horizon. She did not even have to call for Trudy to come; she was there when Rose opened the door. Trudy quickly dressed Rose. She simply pinned Rose's hair back in a comb, and then the two girls rushed to Joseph's room.

But they both stopped in mid-step.

Rose had to fight to keep her jaw from dropping as she saw Caledon Hockley standing beside the door. He smiled as they approached, and bitterness quickly flooded into Rose.

"Ah! Young Rose! Good morning," he greeted her politely.

"No, Cal. It is not a good morning. Now, if you'll excuse me--" Rose said, pushing him out of the way. But, before she opened the door, she stopped once more at the sound of the conversation coming from within.

"Ruth, my dying wish is that you give Rose her freedom to choose her husband. Do not force her to marry Hockley. It is obvious she has no wish to be with him. Rose has a good head on her shoulders and will not choose an outrageous man," Joseph stated quietly. Rose glanced back at Cal who had a smug smile across his face and then to Trudy who seemed to be bewildered. Rose turned back to the door and gently laid her hand on the doorknob and attempted to turn it, but it was locked. Fear spread over Rose. Her father began to cough violently again.

And suddenly, Rose could hear his heartbeat. Perhaps it was her imagination, for Cal seemed to hear nothing, but Trudy seemed to be confused, and Rose knew she must hear it too.

The heartbeat was quick and troubled. Not smooth and rhythmic, not like a healthy heartbeat.

Rose's breath quickened as she once more attempted to open the door.

"Mother, let me in! Please! Now! Let me in!" Rose demanded. She heard a rustling from inside the room, and the door opened.

"Rose, go eat some breakfast. There are some biscuits and fruit prepared," Ruth stated calmly.

"No! Let me in! I want to see Father!" Rose said, attempting to push past her mother.

And the heartbeat quickened.

Joseph's coughing had not yet ceased, and Rose knew that it was time.

"Let me in! Now!" Rose demanded. Rose and Ruth stared at each other, like two fierce animals about to engage in a fight to the death. "Mother, now. Let me in!"

"Rose, you don't need to be here for this."

The heartbeat suddenly dropped in speed to barely beating at all, and his coughing finally ceased, giving way to soft, troubled breathing.

"Rose," they heard him whisper hoarsely.

"Daddy! Daddy!" Rose called, reaching over her mother's shoulder.

"Rose, get back," Ruth said, gently pushing her daughter back.

"No!" Rose roughly shoved Ruth out of her way and sprang for the doorway. But strong hands caught her and dragged her back.

"Come on, Rose. Let's get you downstairs," Cal said, dragging her down the hall. Ruth seemed to be smiling at Cal as he dragged Rose back.

"No! Daddy! Daddy! Let me go! Father!" Rose struggled to break away, but Cal was far too strong for her. As they passed Trudy, the two girls exchanged knowing looks, and Trudy rushed forward, slipping into the room before anyone could stop her.

And as Cal's hands released her, Rose heard the heartbeat cease.

*****

That evening, Rose joined her mother downstairs in the dining room very reluctantly, and only because she had insisted Rose come down from her room. She was unpleasantly surprised to see Cal seated at the table as well, then realized he must never have left that day. She greeted him as politely as she could, knowing Ruth was watching her very closely.

"Good evening, Rose," he said with a too-bright smile. Then he seemed force a serious expression onto his face. "It really is terrible about your father. I am sorry."

Rose looked into his eyes, and saw he obviously did not mean that. But his tone and expression were perfect, her mother would believe every word, and scold her like a small child for not doing the same. Rose looked down and whispered a thank you.

The three of them ate in silence a few moments before Rose began to realize something was amiss. Cal and her mother kept exchanging the oddest glances. At last, Ruth began to speak.

"Rose, the reason I asked you to join us tonight is because I have an announcement to make. Two, actually."

Rose met Ruth’s gaze, suddenly filled with worry. "What are they, Mother?"

Ruth looked away slightly as she began. "First of all, when your classes end for summer holidays in a few months, you will have to say good-bye to your friends. You won’t be going back. You will be sixteen by then; there is no need for you to continue. You have only attended this long because your father insisted. It was the one point on which I acquiesced to him. Obviously, I need not do that now."

She paused, seeming to expect that Rose would say something, protest in some way. She simply sat there, too surprised by what she had just heard to speak at all. Cal watched all of this silently as well, greatly amused, but only inwardly. His face was a mask of false seriousness.

Ruth went on, obviously pleased by her daughter’s silence thus far. "Also, Mr. Hockley and I had a very long discussion today. He has agreed that we should announce your engagement soon. Of course, we will have to wait a respectable amount of time for the wedding to take place, under the circumstances."

The protest Ruth was expecting came. "Mother, how could you do this? Daddy died just today! And he asked you not to..."

"I know what he asked me. He wasn’t in his right mind. He didn’t realize what this marriage would mean to us."

"To us? I think you mean to you! Daddy told you I didn’t want this, he knew EXACTLY what he was talking about!"

"Rose, stop shouting at me, right this minute." Ruth’s voice was very calm and controlled. "It is your father’s fault we are in such a state of financial ruin. You know that as well as I do. We have to survive somehow, Rose. Mr. Hockley will make certain we are very comfortable. Isn’t that right?"

"Yes, indeed. It will be my pleasure." Cal smiled, but Rose had to fight the urge to scowl at him. He instantly saw that Rose needed to be convinced of his sincerity. "Believe me, Rose, I want to see you happy, and well-provided for. And you wouldn’t want your mother to have nothing, now would you?"

Rose turned her gaze to her mother, suddenly feeling very torn. She didn’t want to marry Cal, that was true. But she also truly didn’t want to see her mother unhappy, because in spite of everything, she loved her very much. She looked down and whispered, "No, I wouldn’t."

"I thought not. Your father always said you were an intelligent young lady. He was quite right."

Rose did not thank Cal for his compliment, knowing the battle was lost. She would soon be engaged. Worst of all, Rose was ashamed of herself, for not defending her father after what her mother had said about him being the cause of their money problems. She knew they did stem from his medical bills, and his inability to work for so long. Rose didn’t care about that, not now. All she wanted was to have her father back. To be saved from this horrible nightmare she was trapped in. But there was no one to help her now. Bursting into tears, Rose got up from the table and fled to her room.

*****

Much later, Rose was still lying on her bed, weeping bitterly. Ruth did not enter the room once, something which did not surprise Rose in the least. It was Trudy and Betsy who came to sit with her, after they began to fear Rose would never reach the end of her tears.

"Child, you must calm yourself," Betsy began soothingly as Rose laid her head on the woman’s shoulder. "I know you’re grieving for your dear father, but he wouldn’t want you to do this to yourself, now would he?"

"No, but...whatever will I do without him? I just don’t see how I can survive without him! Now, with what Mother has done...I just won’t be able to endure it! I know I won’t!"

"That is what Trudy and I are here for, child. To give you strength."

Rose lifted her head to look at the older woman. "But...you’re grieving too. Both of you. How can you give me any strength at all?"

Betsy kissed Rose softly on the forehead, then wiped away her tears. "Because we are sad, but not the way you are. Only you can really know how it feels to have had that wonderful man as a father, and then to lose him. What your mother has done is terrible. I refuse to let you suffer all alone, as it seems your mother is content to do. It isn’t good for you, Rose."

"I know it isn’t. I am sorry if I’ve worried you both, but I needed to be alone for a while."

"I understand, Rose," Trudy began quietly. "I did make your father a promise, though. I plan to keep it. If you will allow me to, that is."

Rose gave her cousin a gentle hug. "Of course. I’m so glad you’re here. Now more than ever." At last, Rose’s tears had nearly ceased.

Trudy sighed. "Yes, I can see that. I’m glad to be here. You look so tired. Perhaps you should go to sleep now, Rose."

"Yes, I suppose. Is Mother asleep?"

"Oh, yes, child. Long ago. Come on now, let me help you get ready." Rose happily accepted Betsy’s offer of help, suddenly realizing how tired she was. Just moments later, she was comfortably settled in bed. Betsy said her good nights, leaving the cousins alone.

Rose looked questioningly at Trudy. "Aren’t you tired?"

"Yes, Rose. I’d rather stay here. I’m...I’m a bit afraid to leave you alone again. I’ve never heard such weeping in all my life!"

"I am sorry I frightened you, but if you stay here, Mother might catch you. The only place to sleep is the floor. I couldn’t ask you to do that."

"You didn’t ask me, I want to. Honestly, I don’t care if your mother does catch me. I’m staying."

Rose sat up in her bed. "You can’t very well do without at least a pillow. I only need one, take my other one." She handed it to Trudy, then said, "There is a blanket in the closet, take that too."

Wordlessly, Trudy prepared her makeshift bed and settled in, then turned to face her cousin. "Good night, Rose," she whispered. Rose said the same to Trudy, then lay down again, whispering something, so low even Trudy did not hear. "Wherever you are, Daddy, I love you." Just a moment later, Rose closed her eyes, drifting into sleep.

*****

The next morning, Rose awakened to the feeling of warm sunlight flowing in through the window. The light danced on the walls as it was reflected from the pitcher of water setting on the dresser. She smiled. It was such a beautiful day, how could anything possibly be wrong? She was sure that all of the passed day was nothing more than a bad dream. It had to have been, for how could she ever possibly live without her father?

Rose sat up and looked down at the floor beside her. She remembered then that Trudy had stayed the night before, but she was gone now. That somehow comforted Rose. Perhaps then, the passed day was nothing more than a terrible nightmare her mind had created. A small smile played on her lips as she grabbed her robe and left her room, heading down the hall toward her father's room.

Then she stopped.

He was gone.

She felt as if the world was crumbling around her. The floor seemed to fall from under her feet. Rose was suddenly submerged in despair. The entire world swirled about her.

And then, everything went black.

*****

"Rose? Rose, dear, wake up," she heard Betsy cooing softly. She tried to force her eyes open, but could not. "Rose?"

"Is she awake yet?" she heard her mother's shrill voice ring out.

"Not yet, miss--"

"Oh, goodness!" Ruth exclaimed, cutting Trudy off. "It can't possibly be that bad. Rose, wake up." Rose stirred, then her eyes slowly fluttered open. "See there? She's fine. Now, come dear. We've got to get you dressed."

"I'm so dizzy," Rose mumbled, pressing her hand against her forehead. "Where are we going?" Rose sat up and looked at the faces of those gathered about her.

"The funeral, Rose. Really, dear, do sit up and start getting ready. People will be arriving soon. We have to be looking presentable by then. So, come! Come! Get up," Ruth said, a disgusting smile on her face.

Rose stared at her mother.

"You are unbelievable, Mother! You dared to defy my father's dying wish and now, you are not even in mourning! You are a heartless person! You don't know what it is to love, and you never will! You are cold and--and--"

"Trudy, come with me. Betsy, you dress Rose," Ruth said, cutting her daughter off. She would not listen to another word like this from her daughter. She did not need this from Rose.

Because it made her feel terribly guilty. It was not her fault she had never loved him. She had suffered from an arranged marriage herself.

But that didn't matter now. And none of them needed to know that.

She swung around and left the room.

Trudy looked sympathetically back at Rose for a moment, then hurried after Ruth. Rose stood and looked silently at herself in the mirror.

Presentable. No amount of makeup could hide the bags under her eyes and bloodshot eyes. She looked away and turned to Betsy who was gazing at her with much the same expression she'd seen on Trudy's face. "The funeral? But it--"

"You spent all of yesterday in your bed, Rose, love," Betsy told her quietly. Rose inhaled deeply as she let her sleeping gown fall away from her body. Betsy helped Rose into the slip, then they went about the tedious task of tightening the corset. Betsy then slid the simple black dress over Rose's head and fastened it.

"He truly is gone, isn't he?" Rose said softly, looking at the picture of him pushing her on the swing they had hung in the tree at the back of their property. The question required no response from the maid. She simply turned Rose around and kissed her cheek.

"This is going to be hard for us all, and you most of all. But we're here for you, Rose. And we love you."

Rose gazed at Betsy for a moment more, then threw her arms around her and wept onto her shoulder.

*****

Rose stared at the coffin.

It was like being in a nightmare.

It was a nightmare.

She turned and walked away quickly as the pallbearers came to carry the coffin away.

Rose found that she could not cry. Not even as the priest had given his sermon and all the women gathered around had wept, Rose had not shed a single tear. And she could not cry now, as Cal helped her into the carriage that would take him, Ruth, and her to the graveyard. She had not cried since those few moments in her room with Betsy.

Time passed her in a blur.

Everything passed her in a blur.

Suddenly, she found herself standing over an empty hole in the ground. The coffin was slowly, carefully lowered into the hole. Women threw in flowers. Her mother, a black rose. And she, a red rose.

Rose turned, tears now stinging her eyes, and made her way back to the carriage. She stopped and leaned against it.

Life would never be the same. Never.

Her mother would never love her the way she longed to be loved.

The one person that had always protected her from her mother was gone.

Rose would have to learn to live all over.

But she felt as if she could as a warm breeze swept past her and she heard his voice float through the air. You will always be my sweet rose. I love you. Let my love give you strength.

"It will Daddy," she whispered quietly, gazing up through the light drizzle that was beginning to fall. "It does."

Chapter Four
Stories