Rose’s POV
I sat in front of my vanity, staring unseeing at my reflection. Slowly, I came back to myself—only to see Cal's silhouette in my mirror.
"I know you've been melancholy. I don't pretend to know why," he said, his voice unexpectedly tender. He strode towards me, pulling a black velvet box out from behind his back. I stared at it, wondering what was inside. "I intended to save this until the engagement gala next week. But I thought…tonight, perhaps as a reminder of my feelings for you…" His voice trailed off.
Slowly, hesitantly, I opened the velvet box. Nestled inside it was an enormous blue diamond, glinting icily off of my suspended hand.
"My God…Cal…is it a—"
"Diamond? Yes, it is. Fifty-six carats, to be exact." He took it reverently out of its case and placed it around my neck. I stared at it, engrossed by its beauty, but loathing it at the same time. If he thought that he could buy my love for him with a blue diamond, he was wrong. "It was once worn by Louis the Sixteenth. They call it Le Coeur de la Mer, the..."
"The Heart of the Ocean," I translated, interrupting him. "Cal, it's…it's overwhelming," I continued truthfully.
Cal was behind me, his hands on my shoulders. "It's for royalty. And we are royalty, Rose," he told me. "There's nothing I couldn't give you. There's nothing I'd deny you, if you would deny me. Open your heart to me, Rose."
I remained silent, as still and cold as his heart, knowing that he was lying to me.
*****
The next morning was Saturday, the thirteenth. I wandered around first class for a while, gathering up the courage to go to find Jack. I had to thank him for saving my life. Frustrated beyond belief at how much I was acting like a coward, I ran to the bow of the ship, hoping that Jack would be there. I had seen him there a couple of times, his arms outstretched, like he was flying.
To my intense disappointment, he wasn't there. But Satine was. She was standing on the bars, looking out into the distance. She was singing softly and didn't notice me. I watched her, marveling at her angelic voice.
I follow the night
Can't stand the light
When will I begin
To live again
One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
What more could your love do for me
When will love be through with me
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day when dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
Why live life from dream to dream
And dread the day when dreaming ends
One day I'll fly away
Fly fly away.
She finished her song and bowed her head, smiling softly to herself. I started to walk towards her, to thank her, but was stopped by another heart-stoppingly beautiful voice. I whirled around, meeting Christian's love-filled gaze. He smiled at me, but didn't stop walking towards Satine, who had a mammoth smile on her face.
Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Every day I love you more and more
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time.
I smiled and backed away slowly, deciding that I would thank them later today. If only I could find such love, I thought sadly. I shook that thought away, turning my back on the happy couple. Time to find Jack.
I found Jack in one of the third class rooms. Seeing many curious eyes, I decided that it would be best to have our conversation up on the first class deck, away from prying eyes.
"Mr. Dawson," I began, once we were up in first class.
"Jack," he interrupted, smiling at me.
"Jack, then. Jack…I feel like such an idiot. It took me all morning to get up the nerve to face you."
"Well, here you are," he said, gesturing towards us.
"Here I am," I agreed. "I…I want to thank you for what you did. Not just for…for pulling me back, but for your discretion," I told him, feeling awkward.
"You're welcome, Rose."
"Look, I know what you must be thinking," I said, wanting to defend my unsaid reasons for wanting to jump. "Poor little rich girl. What does she know about misery?"
Jack surprised me.
"That's not what I was thinking. What I was thinking was, what could have happened to hurt this girl so much that she thought she had no way out?"
Suddenly, I had to let my thoughts be known to this stranger. I just had to.
"I don't...it wasn't just one thing. It was everything. It was them. It was their whole world. And I was trapped in it, like an insect in amber. I just had to get away...just run and run and run...and then I was at the back rail and there was no more ship...even the Titanic wasn't big enough. Not enough to get away from them. And before I'd really thought about it, I was over the rail. I was so furious. I'll show them. They'll be sorry!"
"Uh-huh. They'll be sorry. 'Course, you'll be dead," he said sagely.
I bowed my head in shame. "Oh, God, I am such an utter fool."
"That penguin last night—is he one of them?" Jack asked suddenly.
"Penguin?" I asked, confused. "Oh, Cal! He is one of them."
"Is he your boyfriend?" he probed.
"Worse, I'm afraid." I held up my hand, and Jack took it, shock widening his blue eyes when he saw the large engagement ring.
"Would you look at that thing! You would have gone straight to the bottom!" he exclaimed.
I laughed, and he joined me, eliciting glares from a passing steward who had clearly noticed that Jack wasn't first class. I glared him away, hating how judgmental people could be. Jack was better than every first class passenger on board, excluding Satine and Christian.
"So, you feel like you're stuck on a train you can't get off 'cause you're marrying this fellow," Jack summarized once his chortles had died off.
"Yes, exactly!"
"So, don't marry him," Jack stated simply.
"If only it were that simple," I said bitterly.
"It is that simple," Jack countered.
"Oh, Jack, please don't judge me until you've seen my world." I sighed.
"Well, I guess I will tonight," Jack said, not seeming to care. I noticed a leather portfolio that he was carrying. I wondered what was inside it.
"What's this?" I asked.
"Just some sketches," he answered vaguely.
"May I?" I asked, taking the sketchbook from his hand. I sat down on the nearest deck chair and examined each picture, taking in the life visible on each face, the perfect detail on expressions, on the bodies, captured forever on paper. They were exquisite.
"Jack, these are quite good! Really, they are!"
"Well, they didn't think too much of them in Paris," he answered.
"Well, well…" I said, coming upon a series of nude pictures. I straightened my spine and tried to act like an adult, not like a seventeen-year-old. "And these were drawn from life?"
"Yup. That's one of the great things about Paris," he said casually. "Lots of girls willing to take their clothes off."
I tilted my head, half-listening, gazing at a picture of a girl. It was beautifully done, and I could recognize the girl from several other pictures.
"You liked this woman. You used her several times," I murmured.
"She had beautiful hands," he stated.
I smiled, sensing that he wasn't telling me the whole truth. "You had a love affair with her." His laughter filled the deck, and several people looked up curiously.
"No, no! Just with her hands!" he chortled. I looked up at him, appreciating how the sunlight tinted his blond hair and how alive and carefree he looked.
"You have a gift, Jack. You do. You see people," I told him, summarizing his character. He turned to look at me, piercing me with his eyes. A sensation like I was being x-rayed swept through me, and I blushed.
"I see you," he said, still gazing at me.
"And…?" I asked.
"You wouldn't have jumped," he said matter-of-factly.
*****
It was late afternoon, and I was still strolling the deck with Jack. Satine and Christian had joined us a few minutes ago, interested in learning more about Jack.
I was excited, acting like a seventeen-year-old, and enjoying myself for once. "You know, my dream has always been to just chuck it all and become an artist…living in a garret, poor but free." Free. The word lingered in my mouth and I savored it. Free to be whoever I wanted to be, not bound by the rules of society.
Jack laughed. "You wouldn't last two days! There's no hot water, and hardly ever any caviar!" I was angry in a flash, my good mood dissipating.
"Listen, buster!" I began threateningly. "I hate caviar! And I'm tired of people dismissing my dreams with a chuckle and a pat on the head!" I snarled out.
Satine looked at me, sympathy in her gaze. "I'm sure he's sorry, Rose," she said, looking meaningfully at Jack, who looked abashed.
"I'm sorry. Really, I am," he said.
"Well, all right." I accepted it gracefully, my good mood rising again. "There's something in me…I feel it. I don't know what it is, whether I should be an artist, or, I don't know...a dancer. Like Isadora Duncan...a wild, pagan spirit..." My voice trailed off and I saw something ahead that made me grin broadly. Satine saw it, too, and her eyes lit up. Christian looked at her, smiling for her, understanding the desire she felt.
"Or a moving picture actress!" we said at the same time. Together, we dashed ahead towards Daniel and Mary Marvin, pulling Jack and Christian with us. Daniel was cranking a big wooden movie camera and telling Mary what to do.
"You're sad. Sad, sad, sad. You've left your lover on the shore. You may never see him again. Try to be sadder, darling." Daniel sounded truly annoyed, and I could see why, even without Satine's muttering. Mary was way too stiff, and her acting too fake. But none of that mattered.
Satine and I burst into the shot, striking theatrical poses and causing Mary to burst out laughing. Daniel was yelling at us, people were staring, but we didn't care. I pulled Jack into the frame and Satine pulled Christian in. We posed, each one more absurd than the next. Something changed in Daniel's eyes, and he grinned widely, giving us instructions. I glanced over and looked at Satine. She was in her element, following the directions with fluidity and grace. She was a perfect actress, and where she was happiest when she wasn't with Christian. I didn't need to be a mind reader to understand that.
While Jack and Christian lounged on deck chairs, Satine and I pretended to fan them with giant feathers that Daniel had found.
Satine and I had a western shoot-out, much to the men's amusement.
Jack fell to his knees and begged forgiveness while I looked away disdainfully.
Satine pretended to faint, while Christian looked shocked.
Jack and Christian made faces into the camera, while I cranked it.
Finally, the film ran out and there was nothing more we could do. Daniel handed us the roll of film, insisting that we keep it to remember the fun we had had on the Ship of Dreams. Satine looked delighted.
Satine’s POV
I had gotten my chance to be on camera. It had been a magical few hours, and insanely fun. I leaned on the railing with Christian beside me, gazing into the sunset.
"They seem happy together," Christian said, nodding his head towards Jack and Rose. They, too, were leaning across the railing, talking together, smiles gracing their faces.
"I sense a budding romance," I agreed, pecking Christian on the lips. I hesitated, looking out over the ocean again. I wanted to tell Christian something, but I wasn't sure what his reaction would be. My hand reached out to rub my still flat stomach, and I made my decision.
"Christian." I turned to face him, my face serious, but inwardly delighted.
"Yes, my love?" he asked, confused.
"Christian." I took a deep breath. "Christian, I'm pregnant."