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魂游心神狀態......how's wy?

 

  每天在文字裡打轉,紛紜議論。從前我真想,真理越辯清。然而凡人也要作真理,各有議題,我又迷迷糊糊……,昏眩其中,奄奄一息。
 
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  或許太久沒寫作,按著鍵盤生硬的砌拆文字,竟是多麼的陌生。喋喋不休,執筆忘字,語焉不詳……。
 
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  濡染混濁裡,我卻愈難清醒抽離。其實我只想好好的安頓著,反正在紛擾裡好像只能糊塗作罷。但我醒悟不了,卻也沉沒不來。重讀過從前寫下的文章,我竟疑問那是怎麼的一個我。現在我又感到前路茫茫……。
 
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  看了 Sånger från andra våningen (Songs from the Second Floor),在茫濛世態的洪流裡,那盤結在生命的流落和沉鬱,總教我屏息不來。而後我騎上腳踏車,飛快竄過寒夜的街道,回到家裡吃頓飯。還好,午夜裡為一切不盡如意的慟哭一場。‘Beloved be the one who sits down.’──那哀號的魑魅與影子仍隨腦海。
 
  有時候,我真想,既是如此一個在俗世裡長大的人,怎麼得如此痛苦的責難周圍。我抵禦不了寒涼,也只能破費的吃一頓中國外賣以慰藉自己。我不知道實在我可以作甚麼,至少,如今,我還存在著……。
 
魂游 wy
30.03.2001
 

'...the artists of the present day will no longer be able to invent new styles and worlds – they've already be invented; only a limited number of combinations are possible; the most unique ones have been thought of already.  So the weight of the whole modernist aesthetic tradition – now dead – also "weighs like a nightmare on the brains of the living," as Marx said in another context.'
 
Fredric Jameson: 'Postmodernism & Consumer Society', (ed) Hal Foster, Postmodern Culture, Pluto Press, 1983:115.



魂游上期心神狀態......how was wy?

從從從前的心神狀態......how's wy long time ago?

Email: wenyau@excite.com