*Mon Seulement Amour (My Only Love)* - [Chapter 10]

“Are you getting tired?” Camille asked as she ran her left hand through Brian’s curls before allowing the hand to come to rest on the base of his neck. Brian stifled a yawn as he shook his head back and forth.

“Nah,” he muttered. “It’s not much longer until we get to the hotel.”

“I promised your Dad that I wouldn’t let you drive if you were tired,” Camille stated.

“And I’m telling you that I’m not tired,” Brian insisted lightly. “What about you, you look more tired then I do.”

“I was asleep until we got out of Kentucky,” Camille commented. “It’s like my body knew that I was leaving the place I’ve called home for so long and woke me up because it wanted my mind to realize the significance of us over crossing the state border. I’m scared, afraid that Eric will find me…take Braden.”

“He won’t,” Brian assured. “I won’t let him come near you or Braden, even if it’s the last thing I ever do.”

“God, why am I so afraid to get away from Kentucky, from Eric?” Camille whispered as she covered her eyes with the palms of her hands. “This is eating me up inside, every time I turn around I think he’s going to be there, every time I close my eyes I see him hurting me…I feel him hurting me, every time I hear Braden cry it’s because I’m getting hurt and I’m crying. When did my life become like this, when did I allow it to be this way?”

“You didn’t have anywhere else to go Camille, you were afraid for your life and for the life of your son,” Brian explained. “You’re going to be okay.”

“How do you know Brian?” Camille questioned as she held her head in her right hand.

“Because I’m going to help you,” Brian responded. “Once we’re settled in I’m going to treat you like you should be treated, how you should have been treated all these years. You’re going to be who you were, I know it, I see it in your eyes.”

“I don’t see it Brian,” Camille confessed as tears spilled from the corners of her eyes. “I don’t ever see myself being normal again, I don’t see myself being who I was. I want to be how I was before Eric, I want to look at myself in the mirror and know that I’m okay the way I am. I don’t like the way I feel and I’m so angry because I know I didn’t do anything to deserve to feel this way. I feel so worthless and it’s because of Eric.”

“If I could take all of your pain away I would,” Brian whispered as he pulled to the side of the road and turned off the car.

“I don’t want my son to grow up thinking that his Mother is weak,” Camille continued. “Thinking that I let his Father beat me down, run me into the ground and take away the very essence of who I am. I don’t want to be this person anymore, I want to be happy, I want my son to be happy, I want to feel loved, I want it all but I don’t see it happening! I don’t see it happening and that scares me because if I don’t see it happening how is it going to happen at all.” Brian reached out and cupped Camille’s face in his right hand so he was able to force her to look into his eyes.

“You are not weak,” he argued. “You are the exact opposite of weak Camille. You did the bravest thing anybody could ever do, you ran away while you still could. You aren’t letting Eric hurt you anymore and Braden will know that when he gets older, he’ll know that you ran away so he could be safe…that you ran away for him.”

“Why don’t I know that now?” Camille questioned. “Why don’t I feel like I’m doing the right thing? I feel like I should turn back right now, I think that if I go back right now everything will be okay.” “Okay is not having to wait for your husband to think up a reason to hit you every night, okay is not having to run away just so you can assure that you and your son are safe, okay is not being thrown down the stairs,” Brian insisted. “None of that is okay baby. Okay is knowing that your husband will keep anybody from hurting you, okay is knowing that your home is the safest place there is, okay is waking up every morning and knowing that the person who is beside you will never ever intentionally hurt you…that’s okay Camille not the way you have been living.”

“I don’t know any other way,” Camille choked out.

“You’re going to,” Brian guaranteed. “You and Braden are going to know what a family is supposed to be like. Braden is not going to grow up thinking that it is okay to see his Mother cry at the hands of his Father. We’re going to be a family Camille, you could sit here and beg me to let you go back but I wouldn’t let you run away from me again because I refuse to let you succumb to the hands of a person who is supposed to love you.”

“I’m just afraid of not knowing what the rest of my life is going to be like,” Camille admitted as she eased into Brian’s open arms and wrapped her arms around his neck. “All I know is that the only time I ever loved who I was, the only time I ever loved my life, was when I was with you.”

“Well you’re with me again,” Brian whispered as he pressed his lips to Camille’s left temple. “And you’ll love your life again, I promise.”

“Well I’m glad that you three got to Pennsylvania in one piece,” Jackie commented into the receiver of her cordless phone. “I’ve been worried sick since you pulled away earlier.”

“Oh Mom you worry too much,” Brian stated. “Everything is fine, Braden virtually slept the whole way and Camille and I just talked. She’s really petrified about the whole idea of not knowing where Eric is, whether or not he’s looking for her.”

“Do you want me to talk to her?” Jackie questioned.

“She’s actually feeding Braden,” Brian replied. “That’s the only time she’s really happy, when she’s with Braden.”

“Of course,” Jackie agreed. “Braden’s her heart and soul, she made that much clear when she left him with us.”

“I’m going to take care of her,” Brian guaranteed as pushed himself away from the king sized bed and walked toward the living room area, his cell phone attached to his left ear. “And Braden.” Camille looked up from Braden and smiled at Brian as he eased himself down onto the arm of the couch.

“I know you will Brian,” Jackie sighed.

“Mom says hi,” Brian told Camille, her smile instantly widening.

“You and your Mom,” she laughed as Brian leaned down and kissed her softly. “I love how you are with her,” she whispered as Brian set a light kiss on Braden’s head.

“I’m going to let you go Brian,” Jackie stated. “You call me when you get to the city,” she demanded.

“We will,” Brian assured. “Mom, I love you.”

“I love you too,” Jackie replied instantly. Brian held the phone to Camille’s left ear and allowed her to say goodbye.

“I’ll call you as soon as we get there,” she promised.

“I know,” Jackie agreed. “Get some rest.”

“Are you kidding?” Camille laughed. “I’m going to capitalize on the fact that I have Brian, who wants to wake up and tend to Braden in the middle of this night,” she finished as Brian handed the phone to Camille before easing Braden out her lap and into his arms.

“Oh he’ll get over that soon,” Jackie stated.

“Don’t jinx it,” Camille insisted as she looked up at Brian who was rocking from foot to foot, Braden over his shoulder as he stood before her. “I better get going.” Jackie responded with a quick goodnight before allowing Camille to hang up the phone.

“What are you looking at?” Brian questioned.

“You,” Camille responded simply as she stood up. “You are so amazing with him.”

“Well then, while I’m amazing with Braden why don’t you go take a nice long bath,” Brian suggested.

“Are you sure?” Camille asked wearily as she patted Braden’s back softly in an attempt to get him to burp.

“Go take a bath,” Brian demanded softly. “I’m sure.” Camille nodded as she pulled her hands away from her sons back and clasped them together.

“I won’t be long, if…” she stated. Brian leaned in and set a kiss on Camille’s lips before she had the chance to continue.

“Go take a bath,” he repeated. Camille nodded before pressing one last kiss to Brian’s mouth.

“Okay,” she agreed lightly before turning and making her way out of the living room and toward the hotels lavish bathroom.