It happened twice more before they left for California. Once while AJ was there, and again when he wasn’t. Worst part was that no one noticed Regina’s moods anymore, because she didn’t have them. Whatever was going on with her she kept to herself. Marshall was getting annoyed. This wasn’t going the way he wanted.
The third time he thought would be a charm. He had gotten Regina to go out to another club, this time, leaving her at the table and not returning the entire time. When she finally found him, she just went back to the hotel, and again he found her in the tub, a glass of JD on the edge.
The forth time though, she didn’t drink, she was tired of puking, and tired of getting the looks from AJ every time she showed up with sunglasses on. So instead she settled with staying up all night. She never went to bed, instead, buried her head in a book and didn’t move when Marshall asked her to come to bed.
The sex had been tapering on and off. It took two to four days before Regina would return to bed and they would make love. In between the episodes they were fine, for a while. Regina acted content, but there was a nervous undertone. Not once did she confront him. Never did she say anything to him about any of the episodes. Now he was hurting. If only she would have yelled at him. Hit him, thrown something at him, he wouldn’t have felt so depressed, so guilty.
So he started to pull away from her.
They were spending one night in California. Marshall was staying at Dre’s house, but Regina was clear.
“I’m staying with my Abuela and Abuelo, I’ll see you in two days.” She kissed him goodbye and took off in a cab. That night he got a call from Ricky.
“Look, I got a call from AJ McLean, I heard what you’re doing, and slicing her heart open ain’t gonna make her admit she loves you. Fuck up again, and we’ll be serving chicken Marshall at the restaurant instead of chicken marsala.” The line had gone dead after the simple warning. The kid could go fuck himself, Marshall decided. It was starting to scare him. Regina was ignoring him, she wasn’t even sleeping with him much anymore. Though if she slept at all would have been news to him. Things were getting extremely fucked up, extremely fast. Marshall had to be careful otherwise things would get out of his control.
The next day Dre told him that Regina had called to tell him that Catalina’s tenth birthday had been a success. Marshall was surprised that Regina hadn’t told him that it was her little sister’s birthday.
“You didn’t know?” Dre asked confused.
“No, I didn’t,” Marshall replied annoyed.
“Yeah, she even got the Backstreet Boys over there to sing to her, it was a whole big huge party, she’s been planning it over the phone for the past three weeks or so. She didn’t tell you anything?” Dre was surprised.
“Maybe if you stopped trying to make her jealous, maybe you’d stand a better chance of not getting your dick cut off,” Dre replied. Marshall didn’t say anything, but opened his eyes wide in surprise.
“Believe it or not, but AJ McLean is genuinely worried about Regina so he came and spoke to me about it. He’s been keeping an eye on her, and I agree, stop fucking around, cause if the guys find out, especially Proof and Bizarre, you’ll be dead, and that ain’t no fucking joke.” Dre was serious, and Marshall knew it. But he had to know, and asking her would be too easy, and too easy a way to scare her off.
The next evening would be their first concert of the tour, right in Regina’s home territory. All of her friends, family, were all attending. Regina had a little more than just an attending status in the tour. Once Dre found out that she could sing Regina sang the choruses, and she’d even written a couple verses to add onto some of Marshall’s songs so that she would be performing, on average, almost every other song. Of the twenty two songs he would be performing, Regina would be out there for seventeen of them. Regina took on her responsibility like it was nothing and surprised them all when she showed up to the venue, pumped and well rested for the show.
“No nerves tonight?” Dre asked.
“First performance is out of the way, no more reason to be nervous, I’m ready Dre,” Regina replied with a grin on her face. Part of the reason might have been from the fact that half her family and even the Backstreet Boys had showed up for the big night. And they all seemed to be backstage until the curtain call.
She was literally bouncing as she heard the vamp being played out front. Her mood was contagious. It was the beginning of a new tour for Marshall and D-12, for her, it was the beginning of her new life. This moment was really cementing it for her. She was really here, her family was watching, and she was doing something she loved. That’s all there was to it.
“You ready Lyric?” Marshall asked her, it was the first time in weeks that he had actually addressed her.
“You bet baby boy,” Regina said with a grin. She started what would become forever her pre-concert ritual. She got a hug from each one of the guys, even Dre, first Kon, then Kuniva, Swifty then Dre, Proof, Bizarre, and finally, one nice kiss for Marshall, the first one she’d even attempted to give to him in a long time.
The curtains opened, and they were on.
On was not the word for Regina however. On fire, not hot enough. Out there, she wouldn’t have been anywhere else. She had been made to perform. There was no other question about it. Dre had only ever seen one performance like hers before, and that was when he discovered Eminem. Though even this seemed to top Eminem.
To close out the show Regina brought Catalina out on the stage.
“Everybody, I’d like you to meet, my Mariposa, my little sister, and for her, and you, I’m gonna sing, her song.” The show closed to a roaring applause. So loud that they went out and did an encore of ‘Bangin’ to the screaming crowd, finally letting the curtains close.
The party didn’t stop until they finally got on their tour buses. Regina and Marshall to one, Proof and Bizarre on another, Dre and Ace on the next, Kon, Kuniva and Swifty, each to their own with their girlfriends.
Regina and Marshall were on the bus and alone for five seconds before they hit the bedroom. In a tumble of clothes and rushed caresses. It was not making love, not by a long shot. Adrenaline from the first concert, the party, the booze, collided together in a frenzy of bumping bodies.
After they were finished Regina got up and got dressed. Marshall watched her from the bed and finally asked her something that had been bothering him.
“How come you didn’t tell me it was your sister’s birthday?”
“Because, I wanted that to myself, I would not expect to you to invite me to Hailie’s birthday.” She said this simply.
“Catalina’s not your daughter,” Marshall replied.
“No, but close enough. Don’t shove me Marshall, you’re already in with the family, but take it easy. Catalina hasn’t had me to herself since I met you. She deserved a birthday with just me.” Regina replied. Okay, she made sense. And no, he wouldn’t have invited Regina to Hailie’s party, unless Hailie asked for her. He let the subject die, but Regina didn’t come back to bed. It would be the last time for a long time.
Touring went well. For two weeks Regina, Marshall and the guys put on a great show each night they performed. In fourteen days they played eleven shows in five different cites. Marshall’s CD dropped the day before the tour started and two weeks later the second single came out as well. Sales were record high, and the single shot straight to number one on the top one hundred charts.
Marshall didn’t try anything at all for two weeks. Not that he and Regina were even that close anymore. He’d stopped asking her for sex, though she never slept it seemed, at least not in his bed. When he went to bed she was usually up reading, and when he woke, she was up reading. He waited for the right moment but by the time he was ready to do something again, the Backstreet Boys caught up with them. It was going to be hard to get his girl to admit that she loved him while they, meaning AJ and his big nose, shared a floor at the hotel with Marshall, Regina and D-12.
Regina had taken a little more to AJ, much to Marshall’s displeasure, but he didn’t really get a chance to voice it since Regina was not really speaking to him, and truth be told he wasn’t speaking to her. Occasionally AJ and Regina went to lunch, but Marshall knew that she could be trusted, but he didn’t trust AJ. AJ had already tried to make a pass at her once. But knowing that Regina would push him off when he got too close, and always asked for one of her guys or one of married Backstreet’s to go with them whenever they went anywhere, put him a little more at ease.
Just the fact that he trusted Regina, was scary enough as it was. But he wasn’t going to let that pacify him. He wanted her to say that she loved him. He would not settle for anything less. So it was back to making her jealous. If he could get her to even sleep in the same bed as him.
Regina was too wary of clubs anymore. She refused to go, point blank, would not set foot in another one. So that would not work anymore. An industry party was coming up. One that required their attendance, so she went, because she had to, but wasn’t too upset about it.
She worked the room like it was her sport. She swung back and forth, talking and laughing with everyone from LL Cool J and in the next moment trading dance moves with Britney Spears and dodging a come on from her husband. She made quick friends with Snoop Dog and his crew, Pharell wasn’t far behind, and even Justin Timberlake made an appearance and asked her about collaborating. She politely declined, telling Bizarre and Proof that she wasn’t that desperate for a soprano on one of her tracks.
Nick Lachey got smacked in the face when he grabbed her ass and even the retired Jay-Z claimed he’d stopped by the party just so that he could meet the, Regina Contini. She spent a large amount of time talking to Shakira and Ricky Martin in rapid Spanish, laughing at jokes only they would understand.
After Marshall made sure that Regina was fully engaged in the party guests, her customary double shot of JD in her hand, he left her alone. The drink in hand was untouched as per usual until AJ took it away from her and dumped it. She never made a comment. He tried to keep up with the conversation but his Puerto Rican was evident in his skin tone only, not in his ability to speak Spanish.
Once AJ had stood there for about ten minutes at her elbow, trying to put in a random Spanish word here and there, without feeling stupid, she politely excused herself.
“I guess I owe you a dance since you’ve been nice, and even tried to speak Spanish, just watch those hands,” Regina said with a smile as she went towards the dance floor.
AJ hadn’t denied his feelings for Regina. He knew that he wanted her, period. Marshall didn’t deserve her, and if it took all this to pull the girl away from him, he’d do it. Make her eventually see what she deserved. He’d only known her for a couple months, and he wondered if she knew she had the ability to make men fall for her in the shortest amount of time possible.
He followed her to the dance floor, a stupid grin in place as he got to dance with her. He stayed close to her body, but did not touch her. She kept her dancing chaste, no bump and grind, though AJ thought that whatever way she moved her body, it was going to be sexy.
But he had to keep an eye out. Marshall was bound to be around somewhere. It seemed that he waited until they were in a crowded setting where he could find some female to rub on, and usually ignored Regina until he was ready to reveal himself.
He didn’t have long to wait. The characteristic reaction took over Regina’s body when she saw him. It didn’t matter what they were doing, or saying specifically. It was that it was happening, again. AJ braced for Regina to dash, but she didn’t. She tore her eyes away from the site and leaned in close to AJ’s ear asking,
“Can we get out of here?” AJ nodded and took her by the hand, carefully extricating them from the crowd. Once outside, he kept a hold on her hand and asked,
“Where do you want to go?”
“Wherever you want to take me,” Regina replied, though she kept her head down and did not look at him. He had a feeling that she was going to do something she regretted. But he took her anyway, back to the hotel, back to his room, and sat next to her on the couch.
No one spoke, no one said anything. Both just sat and breathed, slow aching breaths. AJ couldn’t stand the tension. The unease.
“AJ, why are you being so nice to me? Why do you care what he does to me?” Regina asked finally.
“Because I think you must be some kind of, I don’t know, but you’re too good a person. I don’t know much about you, but I already know that I’m in love with you,” AJ replied steadily. Regina closed her eyes and grimaced, almost moaning in pain at his words.
“You can’t love me AJ,” Regina replied quietly.
“I can, and I do. I can’t lie about things like that anymore. Regina, I love you, and whether or not, you want to accept it, it’s the truth. I’m gonna do, whatever it takes to get you away from that man who doesn’t care about you enough to get over his own foolish pride and tell you that he loves you. That's what he’s trying to do,” AJ spoke, knowing that things could go one of two ways. Either she would run back to him and tell him she loved him, to get him to stop, or she’d leave it where it was. There was no third option. She wouldn’t leave unless Marshall left her.
“I don’t understand people, do you?” Regina asked as she looked over at him. No, of course he didn’t no one did.
“I’ve been wondering, you know, how long I was gonna be with him, before I realized, that I couldn’t be with him. I told him, no next step relationship talks, I pushed him away, and this is what I get in return.” She wasn’t blaming him, just stating the simple fact.
“Do you love him?” AJ asked.
“Yes, and no. When we’re together, it’s like nothing else in the world, I’m so happy to be with him,” when she said this, she was smiling.
“And when he does something like he’s been doing?”
“I feel like I’ve been tipped over, and everything good, just spills right out,” her face sunk at these words. She looked suddenly thinner to him, her face a bit thinner, more drawn.
“Did it ever feel like that to you, like you’ve felt everything just fall out, and you keep drinking, to try and fill it up again?” she asked looking back over at him.
“Exactly like that,” AJ nodded in understanding. She swallowed hard.
“I haven’t drank anything since the third time he did it, I’ve been sick of it. Drinking, puking it up, just sick of getting sick.” Regina replied.
“It takes some people a lot longer to figure that out than you’d think,” AJ replied.
“I guess so.”
“Reggie?”
“Hm?”
“Are you gonna stay with him?” Regina looked over at him.
“Honestly, I don’t know.”
“You can walk away from him you know,” AJ replied.
“We got a lot going together AJ, the album, the single, seven months, five year contract,” Regina replied.
“Yeah, with the record label, not him,” AJ replied sternly.
“But he got me where I am,” Regina replied.
“Yeah, avoiding him because he’s fucking you over Regina, that’s where you are.” Regina couldn’t argue with that.
“I can’t promise anything AJ. Nothing at all. I like you, a lot, as a friend, and nothing more until I kill it with Marshall. Not that I’m going to. And I’m not gonna rub it in your face either. But if you want to be there for me, you can, but you can’t expect anything overnight, or even over a month or whatever from now,” Regina’s voice, was sorry and desperate and afraid.
“Look, I’m not gonna hide what I feel, and I’m gonna do whatever it takes, to get you away from him, if he hurts you, it’s not going to be pretty, I can promise you that. I told Dre what was going on, he gave me your brother’s phone number, and I called him, told him what Marshall’s been doing and I’m pretty sure that he called Marshall and told him the score. Everyone but your guys know,” AJ explained.
“I’m pretty sure that Ricky threatened him with serving him up as chicken Marshall at the restaurant,” Regina replied.
“Serves him right,” AJ replied.
“How did you fall in love with me?” Regina asked suddenly.
“Watching you write and listening to you singing. I love how much you love music,” AJ replied.
“You know nothing about me,” Regina replied shaking her head. She felt AJ’s hand on her chin and soon his lips had fit themselves to hers.
It was wrong that his lips felt so good, it was wrong that it felt so right. She shouldn’t have liked it so much. She should not have let him continue to kiss her. She should not have allowed his hand to press into the small of her back, or hold her face to his. She should not have liked how different he smelled, how his scruffy chin was soft against her skin. She should not have liked how good he tasted when he parted her lips with his own, slipping his tongue in her mouth, coaxing hers into his mouth.
His mouth was soft, much softer than Marshall’s and he was much gentler too. He smelt of cigarettes, and salty cologne, it was wonderful, it was amazing. What she loved about it the most was that he was so soft, so gentle, gentle was what was missing.
She wanted to know when Marshall had stopped being the man that would just look over at her and smile. When he had stopped being the man that would kiss her and hold her and touch her with meaning and caring. When had he stopped caring?
Before she could say no, or even figure out if she wanted to say no, he pushed her back, but gently, on the couch. Her hands slid around his waist and hugged him around his middle. He eased his body down onto hers, kissing her the entire time. After what seemed like only a few minutes, in actuality a couple of hours, AJ pulled up and cupped Regina’s face in his hands.
“Now I know, everything I need to know about you, Regina I love you, I love you, and it’s not gonna go away, I’ll wait for you, I’ll wait forever I will.” His words were beautiful. It was so nice to hear someone say it to her. Not try and drag it out of her. If Marshall loved her, why did he hurt her? She’d had enough of love through pain. It wasn’t worth it anymore, was it?
“I need some time AJ, okay?” Regina asked softly. Since when did her life become so complicated? Oh, that’s right, when Marshall showed up. Damn him. Two guys, in love with her? God dammit, it had turned into an all out soap opera. Shit, what was she going to do?
“Don’t worry about it Reggie, okay? I’m gonna love you, and I’m gonna keep loving you, no matter what, just remember that.” Regina nodded and AJ sensed that it was time for her to go, despite how much he wanted to wrap her up and keep her safe from harm. Safe from Marshall, from his hateful actions, his cold actions. How could he hurt Regina after all the pain she’d been through? Marshall should have understood.
They untangled themselves from the couch and stood up. AJ walked her to the door, giving her one last kiss before she walked down the hall to the room she shared with Marshall.