Veren zol fun dir a blintsa.

(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
And all the goyim say I'm pretty fly for a rabbi.

Meccha leccha hi, meccha hiney hiney ho.

Our temple's had a fair share of rabbis in the past,
but most of 'em were nudniks and none of 'em would last.
But our new guy's real kosher, I think he'll do the trick.
I tell ya, he's to die for- he really knows his shtick.

So how's by you? Have you seen this Jew?
Reads the Torah, does his own accounting too.
Workin' like a dog at the synagogue.
He's there all day, he's there all day.
Just say "Vay iz mir!" and he'll kick into gear.
He'll bring you lots of cheer and maybe bagels with some shmeer.
Just grab your yarmulka and
Hey! Hey! Do that Hebrew thing!

(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
And all the goyim say I'm pretty fly (for a rabbi).

He shops at discount stores, not just any will suffice.
He has to find a bargain 'cause he won't pay retail price.
He never acts meshugga and he's hardly a schlemiel.
But if you wanna haggle, oy, he'll make you such a deal!

People used to scoff, now they say "Mazel tov!"
He's such a macher 'cause he works his tuchis off.
Yeah, he keeps his cool and teached shul.
What's not to like? What's not to like?
On high holy days, you know he prays and prays.
And he never eats pastrami on white bread with mayonnaise.
Put on your yarmulka and
Hey! Hey! Do that Hebrew thing!

When he's doing a Bar Mitzvah, now that you shouldn't miss.
He'll always shlep on down for a wedding or a briss.
They say he's got a lot of chutzpah, he's really quite hhhhhip.
The parents pay the moyl and he gets to keep the tip!

(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!
(How ya doin', Bernie?) Oy vey, oy vey!

Meccha leccha hi, meccha meccha cholly ho.

He's doin' well, I gotta kvell.
The yentas love him, even shicksas think he's swell.
Show up at his home, he says, "Shalom!"
And "Have some cake- You want some cake?"
Yeah, he calls the shots, we really love him lots.
Oy gevalt, I'm so ferklempt that I could plotz!
So grab your yarmulka-
The one you got for Chanukuh-
Let's put on our yarmulkas and-
Hey! Hey! Do that Hebrew thing!