my best friend is meagunn. i say best friend because she is, but she's more than that and i doubt anyone is ever going to understand exactly what she means to me unless they find that one person that just makes everything click and fit. she is the most beautiful and talented and inspiring wonderful creature i've ever met and i think sometimes that maybe someday i'll be able to catch a little bit of her specialness and figure out just what it is. i worry about her sometimes...quite a lot actually but that's probably pointless. nothing i can do will change her. i don't know if i'd want it to, but i'll still worry about her. i don't want the world to crush her. she's my other half.

i like a lot of things, and probably dislike just as many but eventually we'll get around to that. i'm telling you about me, now. so i live in ireland for the moment, and i go to school (yes, yes, i'm one of those little young ones, not even eighteen yet, and already ingrained in the habit of staying up way past my bedtime, tsk tsk.). i also tend to go to this funny little cold theatre a few nights a week and run around with other equally strange and silly people doing fun little theatre-stuffs. the city i live in is filled with swans. i love swans. magpies and ravens and rooks are nice, too. though i have trouble keeping a straight face around those grumpy old rooks. and i always remember to salute the magpie (one for sorrow two for joy three for girls and four for boys five for silver six for gold seven for a secret never to be told...) a little while ago meagunn was living with me. she's not anymore. she had to go home. you go can to her place here though i warn you she doesn't update often. it's still nice. i go there sometimes still even though i've seen everything a million times over. anyway. she's at home now. where i used to live. i have a home-like place there with a room and pets and everything. i have a home-like place here with a room and pets and everything too. i think that's strange. it makes me feel funny sometimes, y'know, to have things like that. just about everyone i love is in another country. hmph. go figure.

anyway... so where was i? oh, yes, i was telling you about me. i was born in september, in nineteen-hundred eighty-three on the sixth. makes me a virgo by the astrological bookthings and a boar by the chinese astrology. great huh? i run this thing. sort of. i really co-run it. it's an online writing group meagunn and i started just about a year ago. called the fallen angels society. careful if you go there. i've heard there're a few potholes. we have a webring too. it's called behind the mask. i like doing stuff like that. i still have my teddy bear from being a little kid. his name's ricky. i don't remember why i called him that...

i like colours; i think in pictures and colours are feelings. words i don't have much use for, except written words and even those i don't get along well with. all little people-things are made of glass. some are made of that smoky glass, and some that warped stuff that throws everything out of perspective, some perfectly clear, all different kinds of glass and all perfectly solid and stable. then there are those who are little stain-glass butterfly-angels. those are the ones who break rather very easily because they're hollow inside. i'm one of them i think because i get broken rather very easily and often, too. i stopped trying to glue my little wing back though because it's just going to break again so now i carrying around my wing-fragment and sometimes when i just can't look at everyone anymore i take it and look at the world through my multi-coloured stainglass wingpiece.

i read a lot. mostly just anything i can get my hands on, though i do search out particular people. neil gaiman, william s burroughs, allen ginsberg, harlan ellison, poppy z brite. any other neat looking person. music i disappear into. i'm not a musician but i pretend to be. i pretend to be a writer, too. neither one i'm very good at, nor do i really like them, but i need an outlet somewhere and they serve their purposes. i have to have music to escape. my tastes in that are as about as varied as my tastes in everything else. mozart. counting crows. tori amos. ben folds five. beatles. cure. louis armstrong. billie holiday. some others too i can't remember. names don't stick very well. numbers don't either.

so i guess now we do stuff i like (in no particular order really): coffee, books, candles, moon, stars, night, clouds, rain, trees, autumn, winter, snow, tea, lilacs, mint, parchment, fountain pens, antique shops, pretty shiny silvery things, art galleries, museums, live theatre, old & new films, my computer, cool smoky little cafés, soup, the ocean, boats, pretty rocks, looking through other people's stuff, pictures, fires, sandman comics, html (yeah i know i'm sick), dictionaries, colours (blue, burgundy, black, green, purple, red), ice cream, cats, lizards, top hats and long black coats, velvet, the way words sound going over peoples lips and coming out their mouths...i just love words.

the things i do: read (too much probably), walk (my main mode of transport), listen (more than i talk), write (when it occurs to me to do so, tho it happens much less than it used to. maybe that's good. says something about the quality of what comes out. i don't know), play the saxophone (oh and i just love the poor bugger to death so i do), torture the guitar (alas, poor bela), concoct great and wonderful plans for my future life. i tried to set up a literary club at school (once again with my all-time fellow co-conspirator) but it didn't work so. we don't have one. i think that's kind of sad, but hey.

i used to have a whole page full of just vague allusions to me but i got tired of that. this is me. hello world. how are you.

there's not much more to me than what's here that i can actually tell you. i guess the rest you just have to sort of discover on your own. so go see breath live feel touch read learn. have fun. that's the important one. come back & see me soon. i'll leave the light on, and the backdoor's always open.

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