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Kramer Quotes

Kramer quotes:

"I'm useless Jerry!"
"Wrong Mujumbo"
"I'm Kramer"
"I'm like ice baby.... when I don't like you, you've got trouble!"
"You're on cowboy!" (This was on the episode when Kramer was betting on flights at the airport.)
"Hey Buddy"
"You're Sick"
"Kenny never hurt anybody"
When told the cadillac he was driving had the Northstar system he replied; "I don't use it."
"am I so sane that you just blew your mind?!"
"But what am I gonna do for fruit?"
"I'm out!"
"My boys need a house!"
"Look away, I'm hideous!"
"Kramer (Referring to the activities of his video bootlegging friend): "It's a legitimate business."
Jerry: "It's not legitimate!"
Kramer: "It's a business."
"Right now there are six-hundred Titleists that I got at the driving range in the trunk of my car. Why don't we drive out to Rock-a-Way and hit them [very over excited] into the ocean?! Now picture this: We find a nice sweet spot between the dunes, we take out our drivers, we tee up and [makes a golf stroke], that ball goes sailing up into the sky holds there for a moment and then . . . gueeleep!"
"I'm gonna surround myself with wood! Wood Jerry! Wood!"
"Job? I've never had a job," he *muses.*
"I coulda been a millionaire, Jerry! I coulda been a FRAGRANCE millionaire!"
"My boys need a home Jerry!" (Referring to his lost underpants)
"Ya, ya."
"I am Cosmo Kramer the Assman"
"Sweet justice!"
"lets go"
"Yo digity dog!"
"I'm out there, Jerry"
"These pretzels are making me thirsty"
"I'm a man among boys"
"I'm out there, Jerry...I'm really out there!"
"Hoochie Mama!"
"Ho Chee Mama"
"He's rippen me off!"
"She's got the jimmy legs!"
"My boys can swim!"
"Kenny?" Kenny?"
"why don't you just tell me the movie you want to see?"
Jerry: "Cockfighting? Thats illegal!"
Kramer: "Only in America."
"Yippie Yi Yeah"
"I got the jimmy arm!"
"I'm not a pimp!"
"I'm dangerous Jerry!"(when kramer has the lure of the animals)
"Serenity Now!"
"She needs a little Kramer." Jerry: "She'll need a little penicillen."
"TCB Jerry,yup I'm taking care of business"
"yo mama foo"
"I'm afraid of the Clowns!"
"That's not dancing Elaine, You suck!!!"
"Please Jerry, I need that chicken!"
"Jerry, they are not midgets, they are little people!"
"Look at me, am I beautiful?"
"They're very refreshing!"
"Jerry, I know myself. When I'm out there, and it starts to go down, I'm not gonna back down 'til it's over."
Kramer to George when George gets women's glasses: "May I have one of those, madam?"
"Ooch, it's like a sauna in here" (when he's in the sauna)
"it looked like milk Jerry"
When they found out his name was Cosmo, he replied " all right the cat is meeoooow out of the bag"
"I'm Cosmo Kramer, the Ass Man"
"i'm going through this stuff like water"(while he's drinking water)
"my rods and cones are all screwed up!"
"I'm burned out, Jerry... burned out!"
"Stick a fork in me Jerry!, I'm done!!"
"Eveningware, swimsuit, talent, POISE!!!"
"My little Jerry"
"God! us!"
"beef o' reno"
"I'm so keen o' - on Beef 'o Reno - what a delicious cuisine o - Fit for king and queen o - Yeah, eat up - Ive 34 more cans. "
"Without rules, Jerry, there's chaos."
"Wo, Wo Gingga"
"its no picnic !!"
"Ah c'mon, help a brother out". Trying to get Jerry to bring back some cubans from Florida
"Once those gorillas accept've got it made in the shade..ccc"
"I'm in love with Shaun Cordier"
"are you still afraid of clowns? ya.."
"Bad chicken... mess you up"
"It's was like a flabby-armed spanking machine" Kramer complaining to Jerry , referring to the geriatrics in the pool while trying to swim laps.
"I am telling you Jerry I saw a half-man, half pig!!!"
"I'm looking right at you, big daddy"
"You blew it , boy!!!!"
"Oh, I'm the real deal" when asked about his golf game.
"sweet Maria"
"It's not illegal" It's against the law, Jerry replies. "Well yeah." . Trying to convince Jerry to get illegal cable installed.
"My boys need a house."
"Understudies, now they're a shifty bunch. The substitute teachers of the theater world."
"When they pull out that needle, I let the expletives fly!"
Jerry says, "You look like a pirate." Kramer says,"I want to be a pirate"
(referring to George) "He's a sweet kid"
"Yeah...I'm Batman" to George- talking about driving bus
"Poor little Pinkus"
"I STINK!!!" (When admitted that he stinks in golf)
"It's pernounced thermometer "
"Poor Lily" - refering to Susan after she died
"Pam. Pam. Paaammmm." (talking to Jerry about Jerry's girlfriend, who Jerry doesn't like, but Kramer does.)
"Not Bloody Likely!" (in bad English accent)
"I've got to get my core temperature up" (after sleeping in the hot tub with the broken heater)
"I'm out there, Jerry.... and I'm lovin' every minute of it." (I know you have part of this already, but I think this is how it went)
Watch out, boy!
"Oh, I get by!"
"You better get to work"
"See you don't know how to act"
"it's fusilli Jerry"
"Stick a fork in me, I'm done"
"saddle up and ride"
"I sold him my clothes Jerry"
"Oh, I've gotta big problem Jerry!(addicted to Kenny's chicken)"
"they kept ringing the bell!!"
"You're a raaaaaaging anti-dendite!!! "
(To Darren, the intern) "Oh, that's Jerry. Don't worry about him."
"I like to stop at the duty free shop"
"I like to help the humans." (after Jerry accuses him of being a Pod)
"I punched Mickey Mantke!"
"Mother nature is a MAD scientist"
"Just because big Jerry is a has been doesn't make little Jerry a never was" "It's a write off Jerry, they just write it off." Jerry,"Do you even know what that means." Kramer,"Well no, but that's what they do." Jerry,"I wish I had the last twenty seconds of my life back"
Ohhhh Mama!
To Jerry "Would you like a Junior Mint?"
"Ohhh Yyyyyyyeeahhhh"
"He gives me the stink eye! So I give him the crook eye!"
"Now I'm drivin the bus"
"Then I scream out...I'm hit!!" (magic lugie episode)
"Can't you to see you're in love with eachother?" Talking to Jerry and Elaine
"I'm losing it Jerry"
"Up here, I'm already there!(When Kramer goes to California)"
"Do you have any cafe latays"
"oh I am Kramer" Referring to fake kramer on pilot
"That television you watch, the sake you drink, even that kinono you wear... where do you think all your dollars are going, Jerry? That's right!.. the Japanese."
"Now do you reeaally wanna have fun or are you just saying you wanna have fun?"
"Well... this is some 'risky business'!" (while girl kisses his neck)
"Oh I've been known to drink a beer or two. 'Course I've been known to do a lot more than that!"
(to coke addict at bar) "Oh I'm hip... to the whole scene man!"
"When you're on my set... you clean it up, mister!"
"That's Kooky Talk!!"
"You stupid, stubborn , silly man"
"my guys are flowing jerry."
"He's a resonible man Jerry, bu he's insane!"
"Ahh come on Jerry I'm begg'n ya!"
"Botros, Botros, Gally !"
"it's Macaroni Middler"

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