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 ||2:39 pm. An interview crew from LCW has transformed one of Weezle's guest rooms into an interview room. A backdrop, lighting, furniture, all brought by the LCW crew to give the interview that proper, 'professional' look. As Jill Smith sits in one of the white wicker chairs, talking to the crew, Weezle walks into the room, wearing an LCW t-shirt and khakis.|| You ready? ||Weezle sets his TXT belt onto a small table situated between the two chairs.|| Yep. ||The make-up crew goes over Weezle's face, to make sure he doesn't have a 'shine' on tv. Once everything is all set and the lighting angles are re-adjusted, the director gives the signal to start, and the cameras start to roll.|| I'm here with Weezle, at his home in Ottawa, Canada. Weezle, many things happened at Summer of Destruction that will affect both you and Destruction probably for a long, long time. Yea... It seems like this really will be the Summer of Destruction. Between Biohazard and the Blood Brothers, Destruction is not going to get a moment's rest. First off, I'd like to ask you about your TLC2 match. It was a pretty intense battle. Heh, Destruction wouldn't have it any other way! There was a little bit of wackyness between Judas and the rest of Biohazard, but Destruction won, and that's all I really cared about. Speaking of those titles, the Blood Brothers have been talking ill of them, saying that they are worthless. Weeeellll whoopdee-flipping doo! You see, it was like I already said! THEY try to control things. Isn't it ironic that they were not in LCW... and there were no title belts? And if these belts are so 'worthless', then how come LCW management sanctioned a match for them? They can't be that worthless if Brendan and Sovereign recognize them as the ONLY LCW tag belts, now can they? If these are so worthless, then what tag belts have any worth in the LCW? Eh? Well Rook? Well Ronin? Do you have a smart-ass answer for that? NO! Because there are NO other tag belts! These ARE the LCW's tag belts! So if you want to prove your tag-team's worth in the LCW, this is your only option! Geez... they really piss me off... ||Jill takes a quick glance over to the director, to make sure they are going to keep the cameras rolling after Weezle's 'choice of words.'|| Summer of Destruction saw the official return of Rook and Ronin. So f-- So far Ronin has continued to be the biggest asshole in the wrestling community. The man just... just... GAH! I HATE HIM!! He takes nonsense! He said that he wasn't in it for the money, because he gave all of his wages away to charity. Well, George Costanza gave a lot of donations to the 'Human Fund.' I would not be suprised if the 'Ronin Relief Fund' was really just his savings account. I mean... where did he get all this money? Being a soldier?! HA! If joining the military is such a money-maker... then why are there homeless veterean's shelters? If Ronin is worth more than the southern half of Africa put together, why isn't the 17th Airborne on the Forbes Top 100? Now, I am not too sure about the American military, but I know that in Canada, when you join the military, you make about $30,000 a year. Now let's say that you got a ten percent raise every year. If you join at 18 and stay until you are around 35, which is where I'd guess Ronin is, you would be making around $125,000 a year. Not bad, but also not enough to fuel up your helicopter, warplane, and to buy plutonium to fuel your fleet of nuclear subs. And that cummulative ten percent raise is unrealistic unless you become a General or Admiral. So where did Ronin get his money? The SEALs? It's probably safe to say that the pay would be much better than basic military service, but you're still not going to take on Bill Gates for Wealthiest Man in America. So how did Ronin get so filthy rich? Well, let's look into his past... Oh wait! IT'S CLASSIFIED!! Was Ronin working on top-secret projects for the United States government? Or was he smuggling cocaine and tequila in from Southern America, and is just trying to hide that? Honestly... my guess is on the drugs. Afterall... If Ronin knows all these top-level secrets, why is he allowed in the public eye? Why would the government allow him to expose himself so blatantly to the public eye? And more importantly... why would the Russians, Iraqis, Saudis, and whoever else not have sniped out Ronin? It wouldn't be that hard. Buy a ticket to a show, and when he comes down the ramp... BANG!! Drop the freak to the concrete! Of course... That all relies on Ronin having actually lived the life full of lies that he has been feeding us for a year. An insanely rich military man comes out of nowhere and wants to wrestle? Please. What a-- All that money... I still don't get where it comes from! I mean... look around! Most wrestlers have a nice house, a sports car, and maybe another car to do their errands or to do long-distance travelling in. Not Ronin! Nope, Ronin has a nuclear sub, a f***ing warship... three tanks... a shinook... a stealth bomber... two f-15 jet fighters... a mig 29... and a shit load of classified stuff! Now, that's going to take a lot of room to store! By golly, where are you going to store all that? Probably in his secret, classified, 17 story, 26 billion dollar house, visible from space, with a 185 car garage, 13 sub docking station, its own nuclear powerplant, three runways, a heliport, and 38 hangars. Actually... probably not. I think that's only his guest house that his visits once a year! ||Cameras still rolling, Jill tries to get Weezle back on track.|| Does this stem from the incident in the PCW with the car explosions? ---What? What the fuck did you just say?!? That was THE stupidest thing I think Ronin has ever done! He tried to teach us a lesson by blowing up our rental cars. RENTAL CARS!! THEY WEREN'T EVEN OUR OWN CARS!!! THEN, to REALLY stick it to 'us'... he buys the rental agency NEW cars! JESUS CHRIST!! How's that ever gonna piss anyone off? "Sorry bout your car... but here, take my new one... worth twice as much as the one i just blew the f*** up! Umm... AND I HOPE THAT TAUGHT YOU A LESSON!" Whoa... Hold back Ronin, you're totally scaring me silly! Seeing as the su-- Ah! I get it now!! At first I was thinking, "How'd you live!? HOW'D YOU FUEL UP YOU JET, MOTHERF***ER!! NUCLEAR POWERPLANTS AREN'T CHEAP YOU F***!" But now I get it... He's his OWN country! Roninahana! With enough gold reserves to keep the American economy afloat for 100 years, Ronin is able to make his own currency! That must be how he's able to throw around money like a stripper throws her panties! It's all making sense now! Why, I b-- ||Realizing that the interview is a complete failure, Jill ends it before Weezle burns out the bleeper.|| WELL, that's all from Weezle. I'm Jill Smith for LCW. What? No... I'm not done! DON'T STOP ME!! ||Weezle continues to scream out as the screen fades to black.|| ||End|| |
