Raw Rant for March 25th, 2002
Last weeks Raw was really LAME so hopefully this one makes up for it, there is the draft being held as well as the HHH vs Steph vs Y2J for the Undisputed Championship tonight so we should be in for an entertaining Raw.
Raw opens with the always energetic Linda McMahon explaining there is going to be the draft tonight. Austin is ineligible for the draft because of something in his contract, what the hell is that? I guess there are more problems between him and the WWF than they are letting on.
Raw is live from Penn State University.
Tazz's music hits and out comes Tazz as well as his opponent Mr. Perfect.
Tazz vs Mr. Perfect
Back elbow by Perfect and a dropkick. Tazz kicks away in the corner. Lame cartwheel by Perfect and Tazz hits a clothesline and a suplex. Perfectplex is broken up by the ropes. Chops by Perfect and Tazz fights back with punches. Tazzmission by Tazz and Perfect tries to get to the ropes but can't and he taps out for Tazz to get the victory. Wow Tazz actually got a Raw victory. There were some sloppy exchanges at the end of this match but still kind of entertaining. 1 1/2 *.
Vince makes his way out to make the first pick in the draft. His first selection is The Rock. Why in the hell are they putting up the stats for? Out comes the Rock and explains his history on Raw. I hope every draft pick doesn't take this long because we will be here all night.
Ric Flair makes his first pick and it is the Undertaker. Taker throws a fit backstage in the locker room. Hey I wonder if they will allow trades in this draft.
Edge & DDP vs Christian & Booker T
Nice thrown together match boys! Edge and Booker trade blows. Sidekick by Booker. Tag to Christian. Powerslam on Edge. Spinebuster by Edge and both hit the tag. Spinning clothesline to Booker by DDP. Attempted Diamond cutter, attempted Axer kick and a Diamond cutter is hit on Booker for a 2 count. Christian with the unprettier and Booker nails the axe kick on Page for the win. Why do these matches always have to end with everyone hitting their finishers? 1 *
Vince makes his second selection backstage. He selects Kurt Angle.
Flair chooses the NwO as a unit. Yup all three of them. This is the gayest draft of all time. Only 10 picks per person and the rest get selected in a lottery that will be shown on WWF.com, that is kind of smart because that will give them so many hits!
Again we are backstage and Vince selects Chris Benoit. Wow so far Smackdown is all workrate and Raw looks very sloppy. Come on Ric, you know workrate, pick someone better!
Apparently Flair chose Kane during the break but TSN didn't think it was important to show that. Flair selects Booker, Vince selects Edge, Flair selects Big Show, Vince selects Rikishi. That is 5 each I guess. I am lost right now, is this how a draft works???
Jeff Hardy vs Billy
Damn that music has to go. Billy looks tired already. The ticker goes across the bottom of the screen to let us know who has been chosen. Hey we missed Hogan, RVD, and Billy and Chuck, what the hell is going on here? This match is boring. Litacurana on Rico and Jeff Rolls up Billy for the win. 1 *.
Hey maybe after commercials all 10 will be drafted. Apparently we are up to 7 right now but we have only seen 5. I can't say it enough, this is the sloppiest draft ever.
Who the hell is running the tapes for TSN? They are totally butchering this show. Three times the parental warning came up and they went straight to commercial.
Flair is out to select RVD. What the hell, now it's like they rewound the tape.....ahhh this is so confusing.
Rock and Hogan vs NwO, didn't we see that last week??? Oh wait a minute X-Pac wasn't there, now there is a new element.
Vince selects Billy and Chucky.
Ok the Handicapped match is next I guess. Maybe TSN skipped that earlier as well.
NwO vs Hogan & Rock
Nash is walking like he is hurt, oh wait a minute, it's probably all that weight he is carrying. Hogan and X Pac start off and X Pac gets thrown over the ropes, he tags in Hall and Hogan throws Hall to the floor. Hall tags in Nash and Nash throws Hogan to the floor. Nice in ring psychology. Nash gives all his offence in his punches but Hogan shakes it off. Club to the back by Nash and X Pac is tagged in. Quick leg drop by X Pac and a tag to Hall. Double clothesline by Hall and Hogan. Hogan tags Rock and Hall tags Nash. Flying clothesline by Rock and a DDT to Hall, and a slap to X Pac. Rock Bottom on Nash and a leg drop by Hogan but X Pac breaks up the count, and the NwO lays the beat down but out comes KANE????????? and singlehandedly destroys the NwO. What is with these matches? I am not rating this garbage. Another unexplained interference.
Hey TSN's great tape job comes into effect again. In the middle of a segment the tape rewinds and goes to commercial. They are really slaughtering this show.
I think they have finally caught up now with the draft. Flair selects Buh Buh Ray Dudley and Vince selects D-Von. Are they supposed to sell tickets as singles wrestlers?? Look at the rest of the locker room, and the trash that is in it, you guys won't get selected.
Rikishi vs Regal
Lesnar comes out and totally destroys Rikishi. Jesus Christ this guy is huge. I haven't seen anyone manhandle Rikishi the way he did. Somebody take that man in the draft.
Vince comes out and selects Lesnar, but wait a minute it isn't his turn so Flair comes out and selects Lesnar. Vince selects Mark Henry. Flair selects Regal, Vince selects Maven and the last pick to Ric Flair is Lita. So now the draft is over, and the rest of them get selected in a lottery. I will post full lottery results later on.
RVD vs Angle
Should be an entertaining match. German suplex by Angle to start off. Punches and kicks in the corner. Nice flip out of the corner by RVD and a side kick by RVD. Belly to Belly suplex by Angle. Rolling German suplexes but the 3rd one is blocked and RVD nails Angle with a kick. Rolling Thunder but Angle has his foot on the ropes. Irish whip reversal by RVD and a spin heel kick and RVD goes for the 5 star frog splash but Angle rolls out of the ring. Angle is back in and pulls the ref in front of him as RVD tries a top rope Van Terminator. Angle gets DQ'd. Edge makes a run in and Spears and punches Angle. Decent match with a stupid screwjob ending. 2 1/2 *.
Ok it is 11:30 and the main event is starting. Hmmm I wonder how many commercials there will be. Ah speaking of commercials, here is one right now.
Triple H vs Stephanie vs Chris Jericho
If Steph loses she has to leave the WWF. I am sure if she leaves there will be some loophole that allows her to come back. Punches on Y2J followed by a backdrop. Jericho with chops and a clothesline. HHH tries to Pedigree Steph but Y2J pulls her out of the ring. HHH throws Jericho into the stairs and Steph into the ring. Jericho back in and tries to drop kick Triple H but gets catapulted into Steph. She lands in his crotch. Jericho back up and chop blocks the quad muscle that goes all the way around HHH's leg. Steph and Y2J work on the leg. Steph slaps Jericho and Y2J pie faces Steph. Bulldog on HHH and Jericho misses the Lionsault and Steph tries to pin Y2J. Y2J with the Walls of Jericho on Steph, but HHH breaks it up. HHH throws Jericho out of the ring and tries to Pedigree Steph for a second time but Jericho hits a top rope drop kick. Y2J throws the belts and a chair into the ring and Y2J and HHH both nail each other with a belt, and Steph tries to cover both men but only gets a 2 count. Clothesline on Steph by HHH and The walls of Jericho on HHH but Steph breaks the hold. Pedigree on Jericho but Steph once again breaks the pin attempt. Spinebuster on Steph by HHH and he gets the pin. Steph is gone from the WWF! I don't know why the WWF feels these matches are good for the Championship. It takes away the credibility of the championship. 1 * for some of the psychology by Jericho.
What is going to happen to the titles now? Are they going to have to create more seeing that the IC title and the Euro title are in one brand and the Tag titles and Hardcore title are in the other brand? Hmmm interesting question!
Until next time....this is The Net Detective
