Raw Rant for April 1st, 2002
This is the first Raw that Ric Flair has 100% control of.
Raw is live from Albany, New York.
Flair introduces the new undisputed championship belt. Raw has a new opening and a new set that is going to take some getting used to. Apparently Steve Austin is in the house.
RVD vs Booker T
Once again the champ comes out first. This could be a decent match. Side headlock by Booker followed by a shoulder block. Huracurana by RVD and a showboat to the crowd. Chops by Booker. Stepover heel kick by RVD. Hotshot and a spin kick by Booker. Bodyslam followed by a sidewalk slam for a 2 count. Side kick by Booker that gets 2. Spin heel kick by RVD. Forearms and a monkey flip by RVD and a top rope kick. Booker goes for the scissor kick but misses. RVD misses rolling thunder and Booker hits the Harlem side kick but only gets 2. Chops in the corner by Booker. Savot kick by Booker and he hoists RVD up to the top rope to attempt a superplex but gets thrown up and RVD hits the 5 star frog splash for the win. Out comes Eddy Guerrero and hits a frog splash of his own on RVD. 1 1/2 * opener.
Vince McMahon is now in the ring. Why doesn't Flair have Vince arrested? This is trespassing isn't it? Flair cuts to commercial while Vince is in the middle of talking. That's just gold!
Vince is still in the ring following the commercial break. Security is now out there but Vince says he won't leave until Austin comes out. Out comes Flair. The two exchange words. Out comes the Big Show and carries Vince out of the building.
Regal vs Spike
Arm drag by Regal to start off. Headlock into a neckbreaker takeover (what the hell was that) Spike rolls up Regal for two. Elbow on Spike by Regal with repeated covers. Crucifix by Spike. Drop toe hold on Spike followed by a suplex. Half Nelson suplex that gets no reaction from the crowd. It is a decent move and could be used as his finisher. Spike delivers 3 headbuts to Regals mid section. Regal looks for his brass knucks in the turnbuckle but hahaha Nick Patrick removed them before the match started. Spike nails the Dudley Dawg on Regal for the surprise non-title win. DUD. Why are they fooling around with Regal. Regal drops the IC title at WM only to win the European title the next night on Raw, and he can only win matches with the use of brass knucks, and when he fights a non title match he loses to the likes of Spike Dudley, are they trying to bury the European title?
Backstage the nWo take over the APA office. Brashaw tries to take out the nWo but when will people learn 3 on 1 will never work out for you. Wait a minute, this is the WWF of course 1 person can take out 3, just not in this case because IT IS the nWo.
Bubba Ray Dudley vs Raven
Ok this is just weird. Bubba may be able to make it on his own but D-Von is dead. Is it just me or is Raven looking gayer every week? Elbow drops by Bubba and a clothesline that knocks Raven out of the ring. Bubba juggles oranges??? outside the ring and hits Raven with them......OH GOD that must have hurt, cover him Bubba! Back in the ring, low blow by Raven, I bet he'd like to low blow....anyway trash can lid shots to the head. Stop sign to the head by Raven. Sleeper Hold by Raven. Isn't this a hardcore match? Punches by Bubba followed by a Samoan drop. Bubba goes to the second rope but Raven sprays the fire extinguisher in his face. Bubba then nails the senton bomb. Man that is the first time I have ever seen him hit that. Raven hits a drop toe hold on the chair and attempts the Raven effect but Bubba counters it and turns it into a Bubba Bomb for the 1-2-3 and a new Hardcore champion. You all know I don't like garbage wrestling but for a hardcore match it was pretty enjoyable.
Out comes Flair to present the new title to HHH. Of course they had to make this title for HHH, god forbid they made one for Jericho when he was champion. Ok Flair enough with the life story and build up to HHH, if you haven't watched wrestling before that isn't my problem, us real fans don't care about everything that has happened in the past and we already know about. Out comes Taker. Apparently Taker doesn't like the idea of Flair presenting HHH with the title. Taker talks about how he beat HHH at last years WM. Come on Taker that was over a year ago. You don't hear HHH bragging about beating Henry Godwin anymore do you? Taker is getting tired of the "what" chants and asks the crowd to say "what" if they like to sleep with their sisters, and some morons still say it. Good one Taker. Taker is getting ready to beat up on Flair and out comes Triple H. Triple H explains that he is the champion because Undertaker had no clue. A match is set up between Taker and HHH for Backlash for the undisputed championship. Taker hands HHH the new title and leaves the ring.
Scenes from the Scorpion King are shown. Hey Rock is part of the Smackdown! brand now why are they promoting him on Raw?
Hardyz vs Perfect & Boss Man
Oh great, Boss man is back! Nice pigtails you got going there Jeff! Perfect and Boss man attack to start off. Neckbreaker by Perfect. Tag to Boss Man. Sloppy sidewalk slam by Boss Man. How does one screw that one up? Tag to Perfect. Matt tries to punch out of the corner with no luck. Boss Man misses a corner splash and drools for some reason. Matt tags in Jeff and he cleans house. Poetry in motion to Perfect. Bossman with a boot to Jeff followed by the Boss Man slam for a two count. Boss Man tries a superplex but Matt brings him down and tails the Twist of Fate and Jeff hits the Swanton Bomb for the three count. What a boring match, they could have come up with a better combination than Perfect and Boss Man, and they should have torn up the Hardyz instead of the Dudleyz. Wait a minute here comes Brock Lesnar. It looks like he came through the crowd, but isn't he a part of Raw now? He doesn't have to come through the crowd anymore. Lesnar absolutely destorys the Hardyz, I think he killed them both......oh well......No harm done. The match itself.....DUD
Terri vs Trish
Ok maybe they look good in their bikini's but I am still not reviewing this match. Trish wins by grabbing the paddle on the pole.
Vince is outside planning his way to get back in the arena.
Austin enters Flair's office and asks Flair to let Vince in the arena.
Kane vs X-Pac
or should I have said Kane vs nWo? There is no way X-Pac does this alone. Wow what good use they are getting out of Kevin Nash. X-Pac attacks to start off with kicks and chops. Tilt a whirl slam by Kane. Elbows and punches in the corner by Kane. Body Press by Kane followed by a throat thrust. Insuguri by X-Pac. Chops by X-Pac with no effect. Sidewalk slam by Kane. Kane goes to the top and X-Pac kicks him down. X-Pac tries a plancha but gets caught but Nash nails Kane with the Big Boot of Doom! Hall attacks Kane outside the ring. Spin heel kick by X-Pac and Kane kicks out after 2. X-Pac with a missile drop kick. Kane sits up and misses a corner clothesline. X-Pac hits the Bronco Buster. Kane sits up and nails a clothesline and a a powerslam. Kane tries to go towards the ropes but Hall grabs him so Kane goes to the outside and nails Hall. Top rope clothesline by Kane and the nWo attack, but wait here comes Bradshaw to get revenge for the earlier beatdown he took, and him and Kane clean house. Maybe they have big plans for Bradshaw now that he will be a singles wrestler. I also guess nWo will be main eventing until they retire now! The match = 1 1/2 *
Out comes Flair and he tries to introduce Austin but Vince makes his way to the ring and Vince acts like it is still his show. Technically it is his show but come on guys follow the story line, Flair has 100% control and Vince is laying down the law in there. Out comes Austin. Austin plays to the crowd with the WHAT chants. Austin says his piece to both Vince and Flair. He flips off Vince and tells Ric how much he respects him. Austin tells Vince that he will sign with Smackdown! and Vince is very happy and gives Austin the contract but Austin shouts out April Fools and hit Vince with a stunner. Flair is very happy and gloats about having Austin on Raw and Austin stalks Flair and hits him with a stunner and signs the Raw contract. Austin drinks about 57 more beers and hits Vince with one more stunner for good measure.
Overall, the new music and the new set have tried to change Raw but they were still up to their really crappy matches. Some trades are going to have to be made to keep people's interest in these shows. How are the IC and European title's ever going to change shows now? Are they going to do an invasion thing once again? This change of format has left too many questions to be answered still.
Until next time.....I am the Net Detective!
