Von looked at me, adjusted his shades, and ran. He dropped the shovel and it fell with a loud clatter. I looked down at Prototype, who looked as unconscious to me as I’d probably looked to him. I decided to act move before he could try anything in case it was all just an act.

I walked around him, giving him a wide berth, still holding the apple. I approached the door to Conference Room B, swung the door wide open, and tossed the Golden Apple of Discord into the EC meeting. Then I took a step back to watch the madness.

“So we all agree to use this page as it is?” Maverick asked.

“Yes,” said Martini.

“Y-,” said Defcon.

“Yes,” said Burnt, interrupting.

“Hang on a second,” said Icehawg.

The other members turned to look at the Chief Technical Officer.

“Why does Burnt’s pic and bio go at the top?” he asked.

“Umm, because I created this corporation, and I am your employer”, he replied.

“Employer, my ass,” said Icehawg. “Everyone knows I do all the work around here. You don’t do ****.

“Is that a fact, old man?” asked Burnt, rising from his chair.

“That’s a fact,” said Icehawg, rising as well.

Trying to calm the situation, Maverick stood up as well. He tried to reach out and grab each man’s shoulder to restrain him. Icehawg and Burnt were locked in a deadly stare.

“Just relax,” said Maverick. “We can talk this over.”

“**** talking,” said Martini. “That’s all you ever want to do, Mav. You never want to get anything done.”

“Why don’t you say that once you’ve been on the EC for longer than it takes me to piss in the morning?” said Maverick, glaring across the table at the CFO. “Cheers, Martini!” he added.

That was the last straw. Martini jumped up from his chair, climbed on to the table, and dove across it to tackle Maverick to the ground. Taking their cue from this, Burnt and Icehawg began pummeling away at one another. Soon, the four men were in an out-and-out brawl in the center of Conference Room B. Defcon just watched.

Half-disturbed and half-amused, I turned away. To my surprise, Prototype was gone. Perhaps he was waiting to jump me. I’d have to be careful but that didn’t matter now. I was the winner. I had defeated my husband and the reigning champion to become the November 2003 Bar Room Brawl Champion.

And it feels ****ing awesome.