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Title: My wrestler's too big for his box
Author: Rakie
Disclaimer: Not only do i not own any names, i don't even own this idea!
Copyright of Wrestlers-In-Boxes belongs to Tasha and Jami, as does writing big pointless stories about them - I'm just bored and trying to kill some time here!
You have no idea how difficult life can be until you try to smuggle a 7 foot 2,500 pound wrestler into your house without your parents noticing. Rakie sighed and tried once again to get the door to her closet closed.
'Breath in will you?' she complained, leaning against the door. 'I am breathing in!' came the muffled reply. 'It's not my fault your closet is too damn small!' 'Come on! My parents will be home soon! Now squeeeeeze!'
With one final push Rakie managed to get the door closed, although it still bulged alarmingly in places. From inside she could still hear her pet Big
Show grumbling to himself as he tried to get comfortable. It was at times like this that she really envied whoever had got Spike Dudley-in-a-box.
'Ow! What do you keep in here, Rakie? I just stood on something really sharp!' 'Shh! Don't make me put you back in your box!'
When the huge box had arrived the week before, Rakie had thought it was a dream come true. Her very own Big Show-In-A-Box, to do *whatever* she wanted with. The problems had started almost straight away though - when his first pair of pants got ripped (oops, how did that happen?) there was nowhere at all for Rakie to buy him some new ones, because the shops of her small home town didn't seem to cater for the XXXXXXL. And then he'd eaten all the food in the fridge and broken her bed (by sitting on it - what the hell did you think i meant? *L*). Maybe it was time to call Jami and Tasha and try to trade him in, Rakie thought sadly. Even Rhyno couldn't be this boisterous, could he?
The next morning when she let him out of the cupboard he looked so sad and cute that Rakie decided to take him to work with her rather than leave him all on his own for another day. 'Are you sure the people at work won't mind?' he asked. 'Of course not,' laughed Rakie. 'I'll just tell them you're my new bodyguard. You were planning to guard my body, weren't you?' She gave him an *evil grin*. 'Besides, if anyone objects, you can squish them for me.'
It took some effort to get him into her car. Eventually, Rakie opened the sunroof so that he could sit comfortably in the front seat. 'This is silly,' he complained. 'Why do you have such a small car?' 'Y'know, strangely enough, i never foresaw having to fit a seven foot tall bloke into it. Obviously, if i'd been thinking ahead...'
They set off for Rakie's work with the suspension creaking and the car leaning to one side on the corners.
When they got to the carpark there were no spaces left. 'Dammit!' said Rakie. 'Hang on,' said the Big Show. 'There's one over there in the far corner!'
Hmm, thought Rakie, maybe there are advantages to being able to see over the roofs of cars.
She drove round to the free space but just as she was about to park, some little b*stard in a red sports car zipped in in front of her. 'Hey!' she shouted out the window. The driver of the red car ignored her, getting out of his car. 'That's not fair!' Rakie sulked. The Big Show put his hand on her arm comfortingly. 'Let me sort it out,' he said in his big deep voice, before opening the door and pulling himself out of the car.
The driver of the red car suddenly looked very small as the seven foot tall man stomped over to him. Rakie heard him say, 'eep'. 'Excuse me,' said the Big Show, glaring down at the man. 'I think you're in my space.' 'Chokeslam him, Show!' Rakie yelled out the window. The man with the red car, however, was already getting back into his car and unparking at high speed. He screeched off out of the carpark without glancing back. The Big Show gave Rakie a grin, then waved her into the parking space. 'Yay!' Rakie bounced out and they high-fived (well, Rakie high-fived, Big Show kinda middle-fived). 'That was so sweet!' 'Anything for my Rakie,' said the Big Show, still grinning. Then he picked her up and carried her into work so that she wouldn't get her little feet wet in any puddles along the way.
Once they got into work Rakie found herself having the most blissful day imaginable. Not only did her Supervisor seem so incredibly intimidated that he left her alone and didn't give her any extra work to do, but the Big Show spent all his time making her cups of coffee and rubbing her shoulders whenever she 'looked tense'. It was better than the day she had brought her Austin-On-A-String to work and bounced him all over the office.
'Aw, bless,' Rakie said as she checked her emails. 'My sister's sent me an email to say that her Christian-In-A-Box tried out an Unprettier on her boyfriend. Mind you, he wasn't very pretty to start with. She's still
waiting for Jami to bring out her range of accessories-in-boxes though, because he's run out of pants again.'
'Those damn pants rip so easily,' grinned the Big Show. 'Tee hee, that's such a shame, isn't it?'
That evening, when they were at home again, the Big Show looked a bit pouty. 'Aw, what's wrong?' asked Rakie. 'You look like a seven foot tall sulking
teddy bear.' 'I suppose i'll have to go back in the closet, won't i?'
Rakie thought about it for about half a millisecond. 'It's not really fair to lock my bestest Big Show in the closet every night, is it? If you want, you can sleep in my bed tonight.' He grinned at her. 'Weeeell, if that's what you reeeeeally want....' 'Of course i do!' She gave him a big hug, her arms just about reaching around him. 'I wouldn't swap you for any other wrestler in the world!'