xX ::Forward:: Xx [Wednesday Night Warning is on it's way and the Main Event heads Ian Kaufman, RaVaGe, and Assassin aka PiW who will face the 4 Man Crime Spree aka Sabotage, The Walk, and TraumA. Ian Kaufman is coming off a huge victory with fellow PiW teammate RaVaGe against BZ and TJ Powerhouse. The scene goes to Ian Kaufman in the PiW locker room with his manager, the Apocalypse] xX ::End Forward:: Xx [Ian] Damn, what a win! RaVaGe and I kicked their a$$es to the ground! [Apocalypse] You can say that again, bro. Congrats, I can smell your rise to the top of the company already upon us. Good thing you didn't walk out AGAIN last week.... [Ian] Meh...you can't really blame me, EHW was on hard times and I didn't want to waste my time around here. I mean, c'mon, I'm a stud. [Apocalypse] Haha, very true, very true... [Ian] And then that lame-brain TraumA has to add in his very-unneeded two cents in. Well, as far as I'm concerned...he can choke. [Apocalypse] You might wanna wait to take some of that aggression out on him this Wednesday night. [Ian] Ohhh you bet I'm gonna bust his a$$ open. Stupid a$$ is gonna wish he never talked about Ian Kaufman. In fact, he's gonna wish that I had quit, cause I'm gonna make him regret even mentioning my name. I mean, the only people in this world that should be able to say the veloptuious name..."Ian Kaufman" should be me, super models.....and maybe Alf but that's it. I swear. [Apocalypse] Haha bro, you gotta calm down. You have a day or two before you have to worry about taking him out, but I know you can do it. I used to see the way he would talk to you, you don't need that. Damnit your Ian Kaufman, you don't take crap from nobody. [Ian] NOBODY. :: Short Pause :: [Ian] You know, the funny thing is I'm almost a hall-o-famer here in EHW but I have never won a title. Well that's all gonna change, damnit! Ian's gonna get himself some of that there Stable Championship, some gold to go around my waist cause its been damn long enough. So I see I'm going against this "4 Man Crime Spree" well last time I heard of a 4 Man Crime Spree I was watching Ocean's 11 on DVD. I dunno who the hell this Sabotage guy is, sounds like a spinoff of an early 80's Beastie Boy's single, and none the more offensive. Sabotage, you puke faced S.O.B., you wanna go? Do you...want...to go?! Well gear up, cause tonite is gonna be a hell of a match for you. You wanna go the limit? You wanna go the limit with Ian "Goddamn I'm the Man" Kaufman?! Well here's your chance. Here's your shining light, your guiding breakthrough into superstardom. You must realize your just a silly little punk who I will dis-em-freakin-bowel when I face. You have no shot in hell of coming out of tonite with the Stable Championships seeing as how I'm gonna go all out, balls-to-the-walls to get that title, not just for me or Apocalypse, but for PiW as well. I'm hungry, man, and I'm not gonna let you or any of your other little chumps step in my way to glory, to.....the EHW World Title. It's mine, all mine! Now to The Walk. Walk, walk, walk. The deterrent to jogging/running. Walk you are the biggest, fattest, laziest a$$hole in EHW history. You think that you are gonna show up and wrestle half-a$$ed and win your team the title? Go to hell, Walk. It's people like you I despise. You better prepare yourself for one hell of a DoA Super-Powerbomb cause it's a-comin, baby, can ya feel it? Can you feel ME, Walk? Cause if I was you, I'd be shakin' in my little scrawny chicken-sh*t boots. YOU talk the talk, you CANT Walk "The Walk" but I sure as hell can sprint "The Walk" cause it's gonna be one hell of an easy road to victory. You might wanna put your money where your mouth is and show some goddamn respect for I, Ian Kaufman, the Greatest Wrestler in the History of the Universe if you want me to show any signs of mercy. Now to TraumA, the self-proclaimed "Franchise" of EHW. For all you people who don't know him, and I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't, TraumA is a guy who walks around with a chip on his shoulder, thinkin' he's some goddamn lord of the company cause he had a few big matches a decade ago. Again, you too, can burn in hell. Ian Kaufman is gonna beat you down like he beat you down last year. Remember that Pay Per View? Cause I sure as hell do. TraumA you go and kiss my a$$ cause I'm gonna beat the tar out of you so bad, I'll make your eyeballs bleed black and blue. Then....people will forget the name "TraumA" and remember the name of.......Ian Kaufman. What a catch, eh? What a catch....well Trauma, you wanna test me tonite? Cause I'm on a short-freakin' fuse and I'm ready to burst. I'm gonna use my power-technician skills to teach you that I am the one, the only, the unstoppable... Teach you or show you, both sound fine to me. Oh and ya, in the next few weeks, I'm gonna pull out a few big surprises for all you EHW fans, cause things are gonna get a little chaotic. The Ian Kaufman Era has set in, and it's time to take your seats, cause Ian Kaufman and PiW are gonna be walkin' home with those Stable Championship belts! And that, my friends is final.....it's your choice fellas, do you wanna be Dead or Alive?! FIN