Chapter 1

Now I will tell you what I've done for you
50 thousand tears I've cried
Screaming, deceiving and bleeding for you
And you still won't hear me

Going under

Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself
Maybe I'll wake up for once
Not tormented daily defeated by you
Just when I thought I'd reached…the bottom


I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through
I'm…going under


Mark stood at the bar of the club the younger guys had picked to go have a drink at...Looking through the crowd of people...he’d seen a few ladies he wouldn’t mind seeing on more of a personal level...but they were all probably way too young for him...


After he finished his beer he’d decided it was time to head back to the hotel...he gathered them all up and shoved them all in taxis, and then he climbed on his Harley and fired it up...the roar rumbled through the night. 


Mark was just about to pull out of the parking lot when he saw a figure walking out of the club.  He walked over and as he got closer, he saw it was a young girl...she couldn’t have been any older then 16...maybe 17.


He walked up to her and she turned around and he noticed there was droplets of blood on the ground...He caught the girl before she fell into a heap on the concrete...both of her wrists were slashed...she had blood all through her long dirty blonde hair...she had the most amazing blue eyes that could pierce any ones soul.



Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies
So I don't know what's real and what's not
Always confusing the thoughts in my head
So I can't trust myself anymore


I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through



Mark carried the girl over and placed her on the bike in front of him and he took off to the nearest ER hospital...he took her inside and let the ER doctors and nurses take the small girl from him...He stuck around and asked that the hospital send him the bill with her charges on it.


Mark stuck around to find out what had happened...


The doctor came out and said, “It’s a good think you brought her in...She’s lucky to even be alive...” 


Mark said, “What the hell happened?” 


The doctor said, “Obviously she slashed her own wrists, we couldn’t tell why until we started examining her...she has a drivers license on her...she’s on 16...she had an abortion earlier today...and I’d say it was a pretty fuckin’ sloppy job...Most girls who get abortions this young tend to feel so guilty afterwards that they take their owns lives...she’ll be observed for the next week and then probably taken to a high therapeutic hospital to help her deal with it.  I don’t know if she’s got any family...”


So go on and scream
Scream at me
I’m so far away
I won't be broken again
I've got to breathe
I can't keep going under


I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through
I’m...going under

Going under


I’m going under



Mark left the hospital that night not being able to shake the fact that the girl couldn’t even tell her family...and she choose death over life...but then again what made him an expert on women...when he wasn’t even one.  He looked up to the sky as he road to the hotel, and prayed that God would look over her forever.


Chapter 2


- -5 Years Later- -


Jillian Ballard was 5’10” and 125 lbs...Tall for a female...she had crystal clear blue eyes and waist length raven colored hair...


Jillian woke up with the sun shining in her face...today was going to be a great day...she moved around in bed and felt a huge pair of arms tighten around her waist...She smirked as she remember her and her fiancée’s love making session from the night before.  She moved around a little more and the ache between her thighs reminded her of the wonderful night they had the night before.


I rolled over and came face to face with the most beautiful blue eyes...Glenn smiled and said, “Morning baby.”  I smiled back and said, “Morning big guy.”  Glenn said, “I have the best idea, why don’t we lay here in bed for the rest of the day?”  I said, “It’s a great idea but you’ve got a flight to Birmingham, and I’ve got a gig tonight.” 


Glenn said, “So here’s a better idea...I’ll cancel my match tonight come watch your gig and then you come on the road with me...what do you say?”  I smiled and stretched in his arms a little and said, “I think that’s a fabulous idea...I’ve never been on the road with you...and I would love to meet some of the guys.”


We got up and started our day...


Later that night Glenn sat at the bar and watched his fiancée she had on black leather pants, steel toed boots, and a red leather tank top that laced up the front like a corset...her long raven hair was pulled into a ponytail with tons of spiral curls flowing from it.  She was on her last song and Glenn watched as she totally killed the kids in the front rows with her music.



Oh, make me over.

I'm all I wanna be,

A walking study

In demonology.


Hey, so glad you could make it.

Yeah, now you really made it.

Hey, so glad you could make it now.


Oh, look at my face.

My name is 'might have been',

My name is 'never was',

My name's forgotten.


Hey, so glad you could make it.

Yeah, now you really made it.

Hey, there's only us left now.


When I wake up in my makeup.

It's too early for that dress

Wilted and faded –

Somewhere in Hollywood.

I'm glad I came here

With your pound of flesh.


No second billing,

Cause you're a star now!

Oh Cinderella,

They aren't sluts like you.

Beautiful garbage,

Beautiful dresses.

Can you stand up,

Or will you just fall down?


You better watch out

What you wish for.

It better be worth it.

So much to die for.


Hey, so glad you could make it.

Yeah, now you really made it.

Hey, there’s only us left now.


When I wake up in my makeup.

Have you ever felt so used up as this?

It's all so sugarless.



Oh, just go nameless.


She's full of poison.

She obliterated

Everything she kissed.

Now she's fading 

Somewhere in Hollywood.

I'm so glad I came here

With your pound of flesh.


You want a part of me?

Well, I'm not selling cheap,

No, I'm not selling cheap......



When the gig was over Jillian changed clothes and her and Glenn got on a plane to Houston, Texas...where Glenn’s next show would be.  Glenn was a professional wrestler for the WWE.  He was 6’10” and 300 lbs.  His ring name was Kane.  He’d recently shaved his head and his Neo-Nazi look was definitely going good for him. 


Jillian couldn’t wait to meet his friends and co-workers as she drifted off to sleep on the plane.


Chapter 3

**SMUT Warning**


Glenn and Jillian walked off the plane hand in hand.


We grabbed our bags and Glenn’s rental and took off...we would be staying at his best friends house until the next Monday Night Raw.  We pulled up and Glenn punched in a gate code and we drove through to the house...it was beautiful.  We stopped and Glenn opened the door for me and took my hand in his.


We walked over to the open garage and Glenn said, “Mark, where is your dead ass?”  Silence and then a deep southern accent voice said, “I’m over here ya big dumby.”  This huge figure the same size as Glenn walked out of the shadows wiping his hands off on a small hand towel and then stuffed it in his back pocket...Glenn and the other man shook hands and patted each other on the backs. 


Mark looked down at the raven haired beauty in front of him...and was suddenly jealous of his best friend...


Mark said, “This couldn’t be Jillian could it.”  I smiled and said, “Jill please.”  As I held my hand out and we shook hands.


Mark went back to working on his bikes as Glenn showed me around the huge ranch.  We had dinner and later that night I was half asleep on Glenn’s lap with my head on his shoulder...snuggling into his chest and arms, while he and Mark talked a little...


Mark saw her cuddled so close to Glenn and though it was great...he looked down and saw her hands had some sort of fingerless gloves on...they were flesh colored and a strap that wrapped around her wrists.  Mark looked a little closer and said, “What is she wearing those for?”


Glenn lifted Jill’s hand and said, “It’s called a Energizing support glove, it relieves hand and wrist pain...I guess when Jilli was younger she was in a car accident and she put her hands on the dash board to keep from going through the window...and since they she’s had wrist and hand problems...she’s got a black pair for when she’s on stage.”


Mark chuckled a little and said, “Jilli?”  Glenn gushed with a smile and said, “Yea...I love her name Jillian, but I don’t like calling her Jill...so I go in between, so Jilli.”


Mark said, “Damn is she sleeping?”  Glenn looked down and said, “Yea...she can sleep anywhere...I should probably get her to bed and turn in myself I’m beat man...”  Mark said, “Okay see ya in the morning.”  Glenn nodded and said, “Night.”  “Night.”


Glenn stood up with Jillian in his arms and she instantly snuggled down into his embrace...he loved that.  Glenn walked up the stairs with her...and she woke slightly as soon as Glenn pushed the door closed with his foot.


Glenn planted me on my feet in front of him…and sat down on the bed…I moved over and sat straddled on his lap…Glenn captured my lips with his…I reached out and caught his bottom lip between my teeth and bit down a little and then ran my tongue across it to soothe it…


Glenn’s hands were on my butt pulling me closer to him…and his hands started sliding up my shirt and he cupped my naked breasts in his hands…as soon as the flesh on his hand touched me, my nipples hardened…he tweaked my nipples a little and applied a little pressure, making me arch my back and push his hands against my breasts harder…a moan escaped my mouth…as Glenn deepened the kiss…his tongue plundered my mouth caressing every inch of the warm recesses of my tongue and mouth.


Glenn laid back taking my body with him…he rolled me off and laid half on me kissing my neck, throat, collar bone, shoulders…Glenn’s warm hand started on my stomach and then slowly went down and un buttoned my jeans and unzipped them…I could feel his erection pressing against the side of my thigh.  Glenn’s hand slid into my jeans, under the elastic of my panties and he brushed against my clit with his long finger…Glenn slowly slid his finger into my soaking wet core.


Glenn said, “God you’re so warm, wet, and tight baby…”  I kissed Glenn’s neck up to his ear and said, “Glenn, make love to me…please.”  Glenn pulled away and looked deep into my eyes and said, “Are you sure?”  I was chewing on my bottom lip and nodded yes.  Glenn smirked and said, “How would you like it?” 


Chapter 4

**SMUT Warning**


I quirked an eye brow at Glenn and pulled his hand from inside my jeans and said, “I want you to make love to me with your fingers.”  I sucked his finger into my mouth tasting myself on him… “And I want you to make love to me with your tongue.”  I sucked his tongue into my mouth…letting him taste my own essence on my tongue…Glenn groaned…MY hand slid down and stroked his cock through his jeans and I said, “And I want you to make love to me with your cock.”


Glenn got up and as Jilli sat up Glenn pulled her shirt from my body…and then slowly eased her jeans over her hips, down her long legs and off…Glenn hooked his fingers into her panties and slowly slide them down her legs and threw them off to the side. 


Glenn knelt down on the floor and ran his hands up my legs and said, “Spread your legs baby, I wanna see that pretty pussy of yours.”  I swallowed hard…


Mmmmm…Gotta love the pillow talk.


Jilli slowly spread her legs…Glenn started at the bottom and ran his tongue and lips up both legs…and nipped the insides of her thighs…Glenn ran his tongue up the length of her slit…Groaning at the taste of her…she smell was intoxication and the taste was better then anything in the world…Glenn started running his tongue around her clit and she started squirming around on the bed…


Glenn brought his hand up and put it on my hips to steady me…and he slowly started sliding 2 fingers in and out of my core as his tongue was circling my clit…I could feel my body absolutely responding to EVERYTHING he did to me…His ministrations were making my senses reel…my whole body was tingling from head to toe…I knew it wouldn’t be long…


In between licks Glenn said, “C’mon Jilli…Cum for me baby…I need to taste you girl…I need you to cum for me…please…you’re pussy tastes so good…but I wanna taste your cum baby…c’mon.” 


I felt him add a 3rd finger…and I slowly started breathing heavier and started out moaning and ended screaming out Glenn’s name as my orgasm wash over my body…Glenn licked me completely dry…he licked up every ounce my body gave to him.


Glenn crawled up my body and I pulled him down to me and kissed him with a fevered pitch…Glenn pulled away and stood up…he slowly got rid of shoes, socks, shirt…and his jeans…


I said, “Commando…”  Glenn smirked and said, “The only way to go.”  I giggled a little and Glenn got back on the bed and slipped between my thighs…Glenn pulled my knees up a little, and slowly entered me…I moaned from the pleasure filling my body.


Glenn said, “I’m not hurting you am I?”  I said, “No…it feels wonderful…Please don’t stop.”  Glenn set a pace and was going nice and slow…Making sure my whole body felt every move he made inside of me…Glenn grabbed my hips and rolled us over…he said, “Ride me…” 


I started rolling my hips slowly and moving up and down…My hands slid down his arms to his hands and we laced our fingers together…and Glenn just let me go at my own pace…he wasn’t going to rush me.


I arched my back forward and my head back and my hair went down and covered his thighs…My hands on his 6-pak, helping myself move up and down his shaft inside of me…I could feel him clenching his ab muscles…I leaned over and kissed his lips so softly…and Glenn slid his arms around to my back and said, “You ready to go a little faster baby.”


I moaned a little and said, “Yes…please.”  Glenn grabbed my hips and we rolled over again as Glenn pushed my knees nearly into my chest and started stroking deeper into me…his thumb went down and started rubbing my clit…Glenn said, “God Baby you look so sexy with my cock buried deep inside of your pussy…You’re so tight baby…”  Glenn picked up the pace and started going faster and harder…I felt like I couldn’t catch my breath…


Glenn was literally pounding into me…my hips were thrusting up to meet his as Glenn pistoned into me like a drill…I almost couldn’t get enough…I started moaning out my orgasm…


‘Mmmmm Mmmmm Mmm God GLENN!” 


Glenn thrusted into me a few more times before burying himself to the hilt and growling out my name as I felt him explode deep inside of my core…


Glenn pulled out and collapsed on the bed next to me…he gathered me into his arms and kissed my lips gentle and we slowly fell asleep.


Mark laid awake in bed...after hearing Jillian and Glenn making out and her moaning and screaming...he looked down and groaned...damn it had been a long time since Mark had been with a woman...not that he couldn’t get some if he needed it...but he just wasn’t big on sleeping around with women he knew nothing about...


Mark got up and decided now was as good a time as any for a nice cold shower.


Chapter 5

**More SMUT Alert**


The next morning I woke up with Glenn’s arms around me…I looked down and couldn’t help but absent mindedly trace his well tones muscles and vein patterns with my finger tips on his forearms…My back still tight against his chest…


Glenn started coming to life…


Glenn’s hands started running across my stomach…smoothing my skin…his thumbs ran under my breasts and I felt my nipples instantly harden…the delicious ache between my thighs was still there…but I could feel my pussy coming to life as it tingled and started getting wet…Glenn hands slid up and cupped my breasts letting my nipples slide between his fingers and applying enough pressure to make me moan and make me rub my ass back against his ever presently growing hard on.


I felt his cock twitch against the bottom of my ass and backs of the tops of my thighs…My hand slid back and I started stroke Glenn…being pretty gentle at first and then making it a little harder…I could feel his cock pulsing and throbbing in my hand…


Glenn’s hand slid down my body and his finger slipped inside my wet slit and he started stroking my clit to the same rhythm as I was stroking his cock…Glenn finally had enough , and pushed me forward a little and then lifted my leg ever so slightly as he pushed his erection into my soaking core…


Glenn kept me on my side as he lifted my leg and moved over to hold himself above my side and slowly started thrusting into me…at that angle he was trying to get into me as deep as he could…I felt like a pretzel…but a pretzel who was getting the best fuck ever…


Glenn started taking the pace faster and harder…I couldn’t help but reach up and hold on to him…Glenn slid his hand down and started rubbing my clit…I was near insanity…Glenn said, “Tell me you want to cum…tell me…if you just tell me right now I’ll make you cum.”


It felt so good…Glenn kissed my neck and ear and whispered in my ear, “C’mon baby, tell me you want to cum…don’t make me make you insane…just ell me to make you cum and I will.” I couldn’t take it anymore and finally said, “Glenn…Please…make me cum.”  He said, “That’s all I needed to hear baby.”


His lips ravaged mine…as his cock ravaged my pussy…before long I was cumming in waves…Glenn rode out my orgasm…as soon as he felt my walls milking him, Glenn thrusted into me a few more time and started emptying himself into me…


Glenn laid down in front of me…and kissed my lips so softly…he said, “I love you Jilli.”  I looked in his eyes and knew he was telling the truth and I said, “I love you too Glenn.”


We laid in bed for a little while longer and then Glenn watched as my naked form retreated to the bathroom and I said, “What are you waiting for…C’mon…we both need to get a shower…might as well have one together.”


Glenn got in the shower and  I slipped into the shower behind him…I ran my hands from the top of his expansive back, down his lumbar and cupped his beautifully sculpted bottom…

Glenn’s husky voice said, “See anything you like?”


I said, “There’s potential there for all of it.”


He chuckled a little…I stepped up closer and pushed my breasts into his back as I slid my hands around to the front of his body…and started with his well muscled chest and ran my fingers and hands down his chest, letting his pebble nipples slide between my fingers…to his 6-pak…

I felt him suck in a breath as my hands started at the front of his hips and ran down his beautiful thighs…while my thumbs slid down his now huge erection…his cock was twitching and pulsating…

Glenn finally had to brace himself against the shower wall in front of him…with my ear against his back I could hear how erratic his breathing was getting.

Glenn grabbed Jillian and switched positions, putting her under the water, facing away from him…He watched as the water slid and splashed all down her body…

As his hands followed the same pattern as hers did on his body…From the top of her back, down her lumbar…as he cupped her sweet ass...Then he pulled her back away from the water, as his arms wrapped around her and his hands followed the same pattern as hers again…he cupped her breasts letting her nipples slide between his fingers and watched as they hardened even more then they were before…then his hands went down across her very tight stomach and then down to the front of her hips, to the insides of her thighs as he let his hand cover her hairless mound.

Glenn got closer to her ear and in a low voice said, “Spread your legs for me a little baby.”

Jillian complied and Glenn slid one long finger into her slit and then inside of her…she whimpered a little…as Glenn pulled his finger from her body and sucked it into his mouth.

Glenn said, “Damn…I think it’s time to get out of the shower.”  I giggled and said, “I couldn’t agree more.” 


Chapter 6

**Just a little more smut**


We got out and dried off…we walked back into the bedroom and Glenn pulled me into his arms, and gave me a long lingering kiss…I was feeling pretty mischievous so I pushed Glenn back into a sitting position on the bed I smiled and slowly let my body slide down his as I went to my knees and pushed Glenn back a little as I removed the towel from his body.  I took it in my hands and slowly licked around the tip…


Glenn let out a little groan…I smiled up at him and said, “Feel good baby?”  Glenn said, “God yes…”  I said, “Relax…I ain’t done yet.”  I ran my tongue up the length of his erection and slowly slid the head in my mouth…coating it with my warm saliva…I began to slowly slide the rest of him into my mouth…all I could think was… ‘Thank God I don’t have gag reflex.’…


As soon as he was all the way in my mouth I sucked just a little and emitted a deep groan from the back of Glenn’s throat.  I started picking up the pace while I sucked and slid him in and out of my mouth…


Glenn said, “Jesus Christ, Jillian…It feels so good.”  I said, “Good…as long as my baby is happy.”  Glenn growled a little and said, “I’m not the only one whose gonna be happy tonight.”  I smirked as I started pumping and sucking Glenn harder…


Glenn was writhing…he was trying to hold on to the tingly sensation that was jetting through his body…I could feel Glenn’s boys tighten…he was so close to release…to top it all off…I slowly ran my teeth up the length of him…and it was pretty much his undoing…


Glenn said, “Oh God…Jillian…you’re gonna make me cum.”  I said, “So do it.”  I plunged him all the way back in my mouth and Felt his seed explode into my VERY willing mouth…I swallowed every drop as Glenn fell back against the bed spread out…


Glenn sat up, as I stood up…he looked over at me and I smirked as I wiped the corners of my mouth…Glenn couldn’t say a thing but laugh.  He grabbed me and pulled me on top of him as he laid back against the bed again…He kissed my lips so softly and said, “I think…it’s your turn.” 


Glenn moved down my body and disposed of my towel.  Then he grabbed my thighs and pulled my down until my ass was on the edge of the bed…and he hung my legs over his huge shoulders…wow haven’t found myself in this predicament since the last time me and Glenn made love…which was about what 3 seconds ago. 


It felt weird to be like this with him…but in the same sense if felt wonderful.  Glenn pulled my slit open and saw exactly what kind of effect he was having on my body, he started blowing his warm breath on my throbbing clit…


I was not above begging…


I said, “Glenn…please…”  I did a full body shiver as Glenn’s finger light brushed against my clit and VERY present wet center.  Glenn knew it wouldn’t take him long to get me to cum…and now that he knew that…he couldn’t wait…he dove in tongue first lapping at my sensitive clit…as he thrusted not 1, not 2, but 3…of his huge fingers inside of me…to keep my hips from bucking he held my hips down with his free arm. 


I had my fist clenched onto the sheets of the bed…and he grabbed my other hand and laced our fingers together…as he picked up the pace…he was coming at me fast and furiously…just like the movie…I finally couldn’t hold on anymore…I let my orgasm rip through my body…as I moan out, “Oh god Mmmmm Mmmmm Glenn.”  Glenn let his fingers ride me all the way through my orgasm… 


As Glenn helped clean me up…he sat on the bed licking his fingers like he just ate some BQ chicken…LORD…my senses were reeling…but I loved every minute of it.  We laid in the bed stealing kisses for the rest of the day…


Chapter 7


A few days later, and Glenn took me to Monday Night Raw…his big bald beautiful self was jumping around back stage getting ready for his on camera meanness self…


I knew a few of the divas and I looked over and saw the one who’d been an absolute jewel of a friend her name was Amelia, but every one called her Mia…


I walked over and we hugged for the longest time…Mia was fairly new to the company…


While Glenn was stretching and warming up his body…


I couldn’t help shake the feeling that Mia was attracted to him…she was staring at him and was practically watching every move his big muscled body made.


While Glenn walked over and kissed my lips and said he’d see me after his match, I sat next to Mia on one of the equipment trunks and we watched his match…


Out of no where during the match…Mia said, “I can’t help but feel I know Glenn from some where other than wrestling for this company.”


I said, “Well, he owns his own gym in Knoxville Tennessee where his home is…have you ever been to Curves?  He has a chain of gyms around the states.” 


Mia said, “I have like a lifetime account there…it’s the only place I go to work out…I used to live in Tennessee…I was born and raised in Nashville…I moved to Knoxville when I was 19 and never left…I didn’t know you guys were living there.”


I smiled and said, “Well Glenn does, I visit when I have off days I don’t get nearly enough time off that I want with him...but it’s ok...We’ve managed to make it through the last 2 years through all the shit...we can handle this too.” 


Mia said, “Just by chance what’s Glenn’s last name?” 


I looked at her oddly and said, “Jacobs why?”


Mia started to get this really far off hyper look in her eyes and said, “Was he born in Madrid Spain?  His middle name is Thomas, his dad died years ago, but his mom is still alive...his favorite thing to do on down time is spend it with you.” 


I looked at her and said, “Yea...but how would you know all this?”  Mia smiled and said, “Because I used to date him when we were in high school...We never really broke up, we just graduated and went our separate ways.”


Glenn finished up his match and walked back behind the curtains...and came over and gave me a quick kiss and said, “I’m gonna go shower real fast and we can get oughta here...”  I smiled and said, “Okay, I want you to meet Amelia Michaels...I believe you know each other.”


Glenn looked at the diva and then looked closer and he said, “Holy Shit Mia.”  He scoped the girl up in his arms and nearly squeezed the life out of her...


I watched as my fiancée hugged his ex-girlfriend with all he had...he was practically squeezing the breath out of her...he was hugging her tighter then he hugged me when he came off the road...something about this situation was about to go very bad...and I could feel it in every bone in my body.


Oh yea...something VERY bad was about to happen.  As I watched the ex-couple walk down the hall towards Glenn’s dressing room.


Chapter 8



Where did she touch you,
How did if feel,
Why did you let it begin
What did she whisper and
What did it mean, and
Where do you think it will end?
How long did it last
Do you think it will stop
Did you get to try anything...new
How good was she - honestly
Where did you go and
Who made the very first move,
Who made the very first move,
Who made the very first move...


A few weeks later, Glenn started coming in later and later from Monday Night Raw shows...


I didn’t think anything of it until He walked into the hotel room around 3 am one night...he pulled his clothes off and crawled into bed, and pulled me to his body...



You don't have to sneak in the door
Just come on into the room
I've been lying in our bed in the dark all alone
And I've been waiting, I've been waiting for you

There's been no reason to move
It's been as still as a tomb
I needed you oh so badly tonight
But I guess you had better things to do

I should have known that it was coming to this
But I must have been blind
I bet you still got a trace of her love in your eyes
and you've still got her eyes on your mind

You swore you'd be with me at 7 o'clock
Now it's a quarter to 3
And whatever you got and whoever it was
I guess you couldn't get it from me
Whatever you got and whoever it was
I guess you couldn't get it from me


And that’s when I smelled it...


The scent just seemed to linger in the air...It was all over him...there wasn’t a place I couldn’t smell it.


The smell was almost enough to make me wanna throw up all over him.


It was the smell of sweat, and sex and worse off...Mia’s perfume.


They had had sex...that much was evident...


And the Rotten bastard didn’t have enough fuckin’ brains to even shower before he came and got in bed with his FINACEE...


I know that you love me
There's no need to talk
I see the look in your eyes and I got the proof
And there are no lies on your body
As I see you undress Oooooh
I just want to get at the truth

I know that you love me
There's no need to talk
I see the look in your eyes and I got the proof
And there are no lies on your body
As I watch you undress
I just want to get at the truth

There are so many thing that I've just gotta know
You tell me who! You tell me where! You tell me when!
But don't tell me now , I don't need any answers tonight
I just need some love so turn out the lights and
I'll be left in the dark again
I'll be left in the dark again
I'll be left in the dark again
Left in the dark again

The next day, I sat there looking at him sleeping so peacefully...


I just want to reach over and smack his cheating ass in the head with a baseball bat.


He woke a few minutes later, pulled his lazy behind out of bed and took off to shower...and then headed to the arena a few hours later for the house show.  He swore he’d be back after the taping unless fans stopped for autographs.


After he left, I went down and had a rental car waiting for me...



I should have known that it was coming to this
But I must have been blind
I bet you still got a trace of her love in you eyes
And you still got her eyes on your mind

You swore you'd be with me at 7 o'clock
Now it's a quarter to 3
And whatever you got and whoever it was
I guess you couldn't get it from me
I guess you couldn't get it from me
But down in my soul, down in my soul

I know-
I know that you love me
There's no need to talk
I see the look in your eyes and I got the proof
And there are no lies on your body
As I watch you undress Oooooh
I just want to get at the truth


I packed all my bags up and didn’t even bother leaving a note...I figured my being gone, would help him realize something was wrong...it was a reach...but more like wishful thinking.


I drove to the arena...and watched as the wrestlers, walked out of the back doors going to their rental cars.  Then I saw Glenn and Mia walking out...he had his arms around her and she was walking along like they’d never missed a beat in their relationship...


I felt the tears slide down my cheeks as I pulled away from the arena, and got on the long dark road of the highway...I looked at my cell phone an hour later as it was ringing...I noticed the caller ID...but I shut it off and threw it in the seat next to me.


I didn’t bat an eyelash as I continued driving through the dark of the night.



And there are so many things
That I've just got to know
You tell me who! You tell me where!
You tell me when! But don't tell me now
I don't need any answers tonight....
I just need some love so turn out the lights and
I'll be left in the dark again

I just need some love
So turn out the lights and I'll be left in the dark again
I just need some love
so turn out the lights and I'll be left in the dark again
I just need some love
so turn out the lights and I'll be left in the dark again
I just need some love
so turn out the light and I'll be left in the dark again
I just need some love
so turn out the lights and I'll be left in the dark again......
Left in the dark again


Chapter 9


- -2 Years Later- -


After traveling with the band for 2 years on the road...I’d decided I’d had enough traveling around, so one night while we were all drunk we threw darts at a map and decided the next town we hit with one, that we’d just go there and not even think about it.


We landed ourselves in Texas...we drove through a few towns before we noticed we’d gotten the best reception in Houston, so we got part time jobs around Houston, and got apartments, and decided performing would be during the nights and weekends.


I was working in a doctor’s office as a reception making fairly good money...and one night for my 23rd birthday...my best friend took me out drinking...


I was fairly intoxicated...but I was still coherent enough to flirt with anyone who walked by.


I had been saying how much I wanted a tattoo...so she decided to drag my intoxicated butt to a tattoo parlor in downtown Houston...we walked in and I started looking around...


We heard thudding of big boots on the concrete floors of the shop...the wooden doors that were hung between the front of the shop to the tattoo rooms in the back creaked as a deep southern accented voice said, “Something I can help you ladies with?”


Annabelle looked over at the guy standing in the door way...he was huge...probably around 6’10” maybe 7 feet tall...around 300 lbs.  deep emerald green eyes and long auburn hair to the middle of his back pulled back into a low tail...his arms were covered in tattoos from wrist to shoulders on both arms.


Annabelle walked over and nudge me with her elbow and said, “Get a look at that huge guy...he’s the tattoo artist?” 


I glanced towards the door way where the man was standing...he was standing there like a Greek God. 


For a split second I thought I recognized him...but then pushed it from my head and said, “Well, be right with you sir...were just deciding.”


The man nodded and said, “Take your time...you’ll be my last clients for the night.” 


Annabelle said, “Not me...Just Jill...she’s been saying she was going to get a tattoo, but since she was too chicken shit...I decided to help her out, so she’s got some alcohol in her and she’s going to pick it out.”


I said, “Belle, you know something you’re right...I am a chicken shit...but I don’t care...I want a tattoo and now I’m going to get one.” 


The man standing in the door way swore up and down that the little raven hair beauty in front of him, used to be his best friends fiancée...but it couldn’t be could it...he couldn’t tell, he’d only met her that one time...he looked down her arms and then noticed the wrist wraps she had on...it was Jillian...


But should he say something to her?  Nah.


Chapter 10


I looked around and picked out a double heart tattoo and pointed to it and said, “I like this one.”  The huge tattoo guy walked over and looked at it and he smelled so fuckin’ great...he smelled like cologne and leather.


If he would of let me and wasn’t some type of sexual crime...I was dying to rip the t-shirt from his body and lick his chest and nipples until they fell off...but I didn’t see that happening without some type of charges filed and spending a few months in jail for sexual assault.


He looked at the tattoo I’d picked out and said, “We can do that one darlin’...What color and how big?”  I said, “About an inch big and red...a deep red.”  He looked down at me and said, “Follow me to the back.”  I smiled weakly and said, “Is it okay if Belle comes with me?”  The giant smirked and said, “Lemme guess your first tattoo?”  I smiled and said, “Does it really show that much?”  He chuckled and continued walking to the back and said, “Sure, you both c’mon back here.”  I grabbed Belle’s hand and drug her behind me.


I sat in the chair and he said, “So where do you want it?”  I said, “Can you put it on my hip please?”  He smirked and said, “Undo your pants and pull them down a little.”  I did as he said as he leaned the chair back in a laying down position to make me more comfortable.  Belle leaned against the wall and looked like she was about to fall asleep…


I said, “Damn girl, go sit down, I think the alcohol has gotten to you.”  Belle said, “I’ll be in the front stretched out on his couch…it looks comfortable.”  He looked up from preparing the ink and said, “It’s quite comfy actually.”  I watched as she left…the next thing I felt was two warm hands on my right hip…I nearly came unglued.


I looked down and said, “What are you doing?”  He said, “Trying to find the right spot for your tattoo…if I put it over your hip bone, it will be painful…so I’m putting it in a softer place for you…I don’t want your first tattoo experience to be a painful reminder to never get another one.” 


I said, “Well, I hate to disappoint you but I probably won’t get another one…I’m petrified of needles, I don’t care if it hurts or not…if it involves a needle, then it doesn’t involve me.”  The guy smirked and said, “That’s a shame you’ve got the type of body that I could ink for hours.”  I said, “Well take your time then, I’m in no hurry…besides Belle will be out from the alcohol for a few hours.”


The guy started working on my tattoo...I finally decided to say something and said, “I’m sorry, but do I know you?”  He looked up and said, “I was wondering if I should say something or not...weren’t you engaged to be married to my best friend Glenn...I’m Mark Callaway remember?” 


I cringed at the name and said, “Yea, I thought you looked familiar, but I had only met you that one time...and yes I was engaged...was being the operative word.”  Mark said, “What happened?”  I said, “Pain staking bullshit, which should have never happened...Let’s just say we didn’t part ways on friendly terms.”


Mark said, “Maybe it’s just me, but it wouldn’t have anything to do with Amelia would it?”  I jerked my head around and looked at Mark as a few stray tears slid down my cheeks...and I angrily whipped them away.


I said, “How did you know about her?”


Chapter 11


Mark rubbed cream on my fresh tattoo...and said, “Cause Mia is my ex-wife.” 


I sat up and winched a little from the soreness of the tattoo...Mark said, “You’ll be sore for a day or two.”  I said, “Wait...What do you mean she’s your ex-wife?  I thought she was some ex-girlfriend of Glenn’s?” 


Mark sighed heavy and looked down a little and said, “I meet Mia a few years ago...and after 4 short weeks of dating we got married.  Half way through the marriage...She met Glenn...Well their friendship seemed to hit it off pretty good...and when I was taken to Smackdown and she was taken to Raw...I didn’t think anything of it...but I started hearing rumors...and before I knew it, everyone from Raw was calling me and telling me, that Glenn and Mia were too close, if you know what I mean.”


I said, “Oh yea, I know exactly what you mean.”


Mark scoffed and said, “I finally found Glenn back stage at a joint pay per-view...and I pulled him into a dressing room...I knew by the totally guilty look he had on his face, the rumors I’d heard were true...So I finally told him ‘What ever you’ve got going on with my wife, that I keep hearing about...I expect to stop after tonight is over.’...” 


Mark exhaled and continued, “I left the dressing room and ran into Mia...she didn’t hug me or anything, so I knew something was fishy...she didn’t even act like she was excited to see me.  The next thing I know she’s handing me divorce papers in an envelope...telling me she doesn’t want the burden of being married.”


I said, “So what happened with her and Glenn?”  Mark said, “Well...Glenn stopped seeing her, I haven’t seen her since...When I met you, all I could think was...Wow Glenn is settling down...he’s actually taking a step in the direction to having a great future with someone who loved him.  So what happened with you guys?”


Mark laid me back down again and put a bandage over the tattoo and taped it and I said, “Mia sat there and lead me to believe they used to be high school sweet hearts that’d separated ways after high school or college or what ever...”  Mark said, “She wasn’t lying about that...they used to date, but I didn’t find out about it until after the divorce was final...Glenn sat me down and started pouring his heart out to me and telling me all about it...and what have you.”


I said, “Great, so their not a pair of liars, just cheaters...Glenn started coming back to the hotel later and later, and I was just trying to play dumb, but the whole time I knew what was really going on...I knew he was with her...and then the last night I was with Glenn...he came in at 3 am...and reeked of her perfume...he smelled like sweat, perfume and her scent...The bastard had sex with her, and didn’t even had enough brain to shower before he came to our room and crawled his cheatin’ ass into bed with me...”


I scoffed and said, “I should of known when I meet Glenn 4 years ago it was too good to be true...I had such a bad childhood, and hated every thing about my past...And when I meet Glenn, I couldn’t get over how wonderful he was...Everything I’d gone through for the past 19 years all disappeared when he made me laugh...I loved it...I loved him.”


We stood there for a minute...and I finally said, “Wait a minute...what are you doing working in a tattoo parlor?  I thought you was a wrestler?” 


Mark leaned against the door frame and said, “Well...I bought this place a few months back and decided if and when I got ready to retire in a couple of years I’d do tattoos...I love ‘em...and since, I can draw like everyone else...I went to a few tattoo classes...and I’ve got a certificate now...plus right now I’m on injury leave...I tour 3 different muscles in my thigh...I’ve got 3 more months before I can get back in the ring...and well...Let’s face it, sitting at home will give me cabin fever and riding my bike all the time will get old...so what the hell, I figured I might as well earn some extra cash for a rainy day.”


I said, “That’s actually a really great idea.”


Chapter 12


Mark looked down and said, “I’m beat...you look like you could use some sleep to darlin’...I’ve got a bed in the back here if you’d like to stay here.” 


I smiled and said, “That would be great...I don’t want to wake Belle anyways...she’s a bit of a grouch if you wake her from a sound sleep.”  Mark said, “If y’all leave before 11 tomorrow go out the back door and lock it...but if not...I’ll wake you up at 11.”  I said, “Okay thanks.” 


Mark showed me to the extra room in the back of the parlor, after throwing a blanket over Belle, and I carefully put a pillow under her head.  Mark handed me a t-shirt and said, “Don’t sleep in your jeans; it will irritate your tattoo.”  


I held the shirt up to me and said, “Damn, this is obviously one of your shirts...because dayum it’s like 14 sizes too big for me.”  Mark said, “I keep an extra shirt handy incase I get ink on me...it’s clean.”  I said, “Thanks, I really appreciate this.”


Mark started to leave but he couldn’t shake the feeling he had for this beautiful girl.  He walked back over and touched her shoulder...when she looked up at him; he pulled her to his big body and gave her a loving hug.


I almost couldn’t believe he was hugging me...He said, “I’m sorry you was the next victim of them...If I would of known what was going on, I would have warned you.”  I patted his arm and said, “Its okay...it’s no ones fault but Glenn’s...he’s the one who cheated...Thanks for listening though.”  Mark said, “Anytime.”


Mark pulled away and as he closed the door he said, “Night.”  I smiled and said, “Night.” As I shed my jeans and shirt, and pulled his t-shirt on...


Oh God even a clean shirt smelled like him...I couldn’t help but lay in the bed in the dark and smell his shirt as I drifted off to sleep.


The next day Mark pulled up to the back of his shop and noticed the girls were still sleeping soundly...he walked in and started making some coffee...and walked into the back room and found Jillian tiring her boots and she looked up at him through her raven mane and smiled and said, “I’m sorry we over slept...Is Belle still sleeping?  I tried waking her up once and she said she was going to kick fat as if I didn’t leave her alone.”


I stood up and said, “Thanks for the use of the bed...I really appreciate it...and also for the shirt.”  I handed Mark the shirt and he said, “No problem...How’s the tat?”  I said, “It’s a little sore, but not too bad...you wanna take a look at it before I get Belle and leave?”


Mark said, “No, but I would like to take you to dinner tonight if your free.”


My head snapped up and I said, “Are you serious?”  Mark chuckled a little...Lord but he was gorgeous when he smiled....He said, “Yes...if that’s okay with you.”


What girl in her right mind would say no it’s not okay...I mean say it without being thrown into an insane asylum for the next 40 years for passing up the chance to have dinner with a God...


I finally said, “Okay...you’re on.”  I wrote my address down and cell phone number and handed him the paper...and said, “You call me in a while and let me know when, where and what to wear.”  Mark said, “Okay.”


I smiled and grabbed my purse and keys and said, “Bye.”  Mark said, “Bye.”


I walked up front and practically drug Belle out the door and shoved her ass into her car as we left.


Chapter 13


- -3 Months Later- -


I woke up in bed feeling so damn lazy...I’d slept in bed for the last 2 days...of course it wasn’t without company...but it was totally Mark’s fault.  I guess y’all want some kind of explanation...


Well to be perfectly honest...the first date with Mark...I guess you could say we got hooked on each other...Because 2 months later we moved in together...Mark had decided on taking 3 more extra months on his leg...just as a precautionary measure...which the trainer said was a great idea. 


I rolled around in bed and noticed the huge bed was empty, with only me in it.  I moved around a little more and then heard some moving around in the room...My feet happen to brush against something solid...and my eyes flew open and I looked down and there was Mark lacing up his steel toed boots.


I crawled up the bed and wrapped my arm around his neck and he said, “Morning beautiful.” 


I looked in the mirror across from us and said, “Beautiful...with this bed head are you insane?” 


Mark said, “I must be.” 


I pulled Mark back until he was laying back with his legs dangling off the foot of the bed...I threw my leg over him and sat straddled on his lap...I said, “So, what’s on the agenda for today?” 


Mark said, “Well...I need to work on one of my bikes and then work out in the gym a little.”


I laid down so my body was parallel to his and pushed a piece of stray red hair out of his face and ran my thumb over his soft red lips, and said, “When you get ready to go in the gym, lemme know...I’ll come with and give you a work out you’ll never forget.” 


Mark wrapped his arms around me and said, “You already gave me an unforgettable workout darlin’ last night, all day yesterday, night before last.”


I kissed his lips softly and said, “Yea, well I had a lot of encouragement...How is your leg feeling today anyways?” 


Mark said, “Not too bad...I’m glad I took the extra months off...”


I smiled and said, “Yea, me too.” 


Mark sat up with me still straddling his lap, then stood up and I wrapped my legs around his waist...he carried me in and deposited me in the bathroom and I said, “Thanks for the lift.” 


He gave me a kiss and said, “For you anytime...If you need anything I’ll be in the garage.” 


I said, “Okay.”


Chapter 14


I took a shower and then went down stairs...I hopped up on the counter and was reading the WWE inter-company paper...just something Vince liked doing to keep every one up on every one else’s lives...


There was a picture of Mia and Glenn...and apparently they were ENGAGED!!!!! 


I couldn’t help myself...I started drawing horns on them and blacking out there teeth...so they looked like rednecks who worshiped the devil.


I rolled my eyes and threw the paper to the side as I walked over and turned the radio on and a song came on.  As I listened to the song, I couldn’t believe how perfect it was as a description from me to Mia.


Artist: Lee Ann Womack

Song: I'll Think of a Reason Later



I heard he was gonna marry some girl from Denver
Then my sister came over, had the Sunday paper with her
There was the girl on the social page
Lookin' in love and all engaged
We decided she don't take a very good picture

It may be my family's redneck nature
Rubbin' off, bringin' out unlady-like behavior
It sure ain't Christian to judge a stranger
But I don't like her
She may be an angel who spends all winter
Bringin' the homeless blankets and dinner
A regular Nobel Peace Prize winner
But I really hate her
I'll think of a reason later

I drew horns and blacked out her tooth with a marker
Childish, yes, but she made such a thin little target
I couldn't be happier on my own
But I've got the slightest of a jealous bone
And seein' her with him tends to enlarge it

It may be my family's redneck nature
Rubbin' off, bringin' out unlady-like behavior
It sure ain't Christian to judge a stranger
But I don't like her
She may be an angel who spends all winter
Bringin' the homeless blankets and dinner
A regular Nobel Peace Prize winner
But I really hate her
I'll think of a reason later

Inside her head may lay all the answers
For curing' diseases from baldness to cancer
Salt of the earth and a real good dancer
But I really hate her
I'll think of a reason later


Well, it was just one tooth
Did I mention I don't particularly care for her?
She makes me sick...



So the demon couple had decided to get married...all the luck in their domestic life of creating demon spawns...I hope all their children grow up to eventually quit college on them.


Of course I’m not bitter...who would ever think that??


Chapter 15


A few weeks later, Mark was getting cabin fever so one night while at the bar in town the guys and I had a performance...Mark sat at the bar and watched me get ready...


Mark never noticed how cute her ass looked in her black leather pants before...she had on a black leather tank top too, that was showing off her navel and navel ring...her black steel toed boots thudded against the stage when she walked down and forth...and she had those damn black fingerless wrist gloves on again...he’d been trying to get her to come clean about why she had to wear them...but no such luck yet.


I had bent down and was checking the sound of my microphone and audio...when I stood up and flipped my hair back I saw Mark watching me...I smiled and blew a kiss to him...


A few hours later, and Mark was still sitting at the bar nursing a beer and watched as Jillian jumped around the stage singing and having a good time with the bands fans. 


A few minutes after her second to last song was over she stopped and said, “This next song is something I wrote a few years ago, I went through a rough patch in my life...and after I’d coped as best as I could, I started using writing as an outlet to get away from my life...But remember one thing...there’s always someone there who is willing to listen and help you as best as they can...even if they don’t have all the answers.”


I tried to kill the pain
But only brought more
So much more
I lay dying
And I'm pouring crimson
Regret and betrayal

I'm dying...praying
Bleeding...and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved
Am I too lost

My God...my Tourniquet
Return to me Salvation
My God...my Tourniquet
Return to me Salvation

Do you remember me
Lost for so long
Will you be on
The other side
Will you forget me

I'm dying...praying
Bleeding...and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved
Am I too lost

My God...my Tourniquet
Return to me Salvation
My God...my Tourniquet
Return to me Salvation

Oooh...Return to me Salvation



My God...my Tourniquet
Return to me Salvation
My God...my Tourniquet
Return to me Salvation

My wounds...cry for the grave
My soul...cries for Deliverance
Will I be...denied
My Suicide

Return to me Salvation

Return to us Salvation



Later that night once we were back at the house...and had gotten dinner over with...Mark was getting ready for his shower when he said, “I liked your last song...those were some pretty powerful words ya know...talking about bleeding and suicide...” 


I leaned against the door jam of the bedroom and said, “Yea, well when you’ve been through my life...then you have a reason for it.”  Mark walked over and touched my cheek and said, “I know you’re not ready to talk about it...but eventually you will be...and I’ll be ready to listen.”


I kissed the palm of his hand and said, “Thank you...Just knowing you’re here for me, makes me feel so much better.”  Mark leaned down and kissed me...


Chapter 16



What started off as a little kiss turned heated fast.  Mark pulled me into the bedroom and closed the door.


Mark pushed the raven haired beauty against the door and captured her lips with his...as he lifted her and she wrapped her legs around his waist...his big hands sliding across her ass....Mark walked over and laid on top of her on the bed...


Mark pulled back and pulled her shirt from her body, as she yanked his t-shirt off...Mark started trailing warm wet kisses down her neck and throat to her breasts and nipples...


His lips circled around her right rosy nipple and Jillian moaned out, “Mark.”  Mark’s hands came up and unbuttoned her pants and he pulled them down with her panties...he could already smell her arousal...she kicked her boots and socks off and he discarded her pants and panties...as he discarded his jeans. 


Jillian scooted towards the foot of the bed and took Mark’s massive erection into her tiny hands and stroked him slowly and methodically slid her tongue up his shaft.  Mark groaned out...as he wrapped his hands in her waist length raven hair.  She took his shaft into her warm wet mouth...he was in total heaven...but he was trying to keep himself from exploding in her mouth...he eased himself out of her mouth and laid her back onto the bed and crawled up her soft small framed body, careful not to crush her...


She wrapped her legs around his waist again and his erection brushed against her soaking wet center.  Making both of them groan at the friction...Mark slid two fingers into her to make sure she was ready enough for him...he didn’t want to hurt her...He looked up and she bit her bottom lip as her back arched and her center was pushed into his hand...oh yea...she was ready.


Mark moved around and slowly slid his painfully aching erection into her warm wet center...he could feel her stretching and accommodating his shaft...all of his shaft...once fully sheathed Mark sat there for a minute make sure she was fully used to his size...and then slowly started working his hips back and forth and working his erection in and out of her.


Every time he would push into her she would arch her back as though she wanted him deeper.  Mark grabbed her knees and pushed them up and apart and placed his hands on the back of her thighs and as he pushed into her...he felt himself go deeper...she must’ve felt it before cause she moaned low and hard.


Mark lifted her up and pushed her against the wall...and thrusting up...holding onto the wall...She gripped his forearms for leverage...as Mark kissed and licked down her neck and throat...nipping at her flesh with his teeth and then soothing it with hot kisses...


Mark pulled out of her and she went to the bed and beckoned him with her index finger...she got up on her hands and knees and Mark slid his erection onto her doggy style...this he could handle...he gripped her hips and started thrusting into her like some wild animal...


Her hands touched his as she stood on her knees and came back and traced his lips with her tongue and he pulled her tongue into his mouth with his lips...and she could instantly feel his erection swell to a larger size inside of her...it must’ve turned him on a little more...actually A LOT more...


Mark’s hands went to her breast rolling her nipples and watching them harden...his hand slid along her flat stomach, across her navel...and down to her mound...where he found her clit waiting for contact from him....he started rubbing circles around her clit with one hand and rolling her nipples and caressing her breasts with his other hand...


When her hands touched the bed...Mark could feel her inner walls starting to clamp down around his shaft...Mark leaned over her, pulling her back tight against his chest and kissed along her ear and in a low deep voice said, “You gonna cum for my cock baby...huh...is that sweet little pussy of yours gonna cum for me.” 


Jillian started pushing back against him...the hot air of his breath brushed against her ear and him pumping into her relentlessly, was her undoing as she started cumming instantly...she started off moaning and ended up screaming, “MARRRRRRRRRRRRRRK!!!!!”


Mark felt her cum cover his shaft and as her warm juices coated his erection...he thrusted into her a few more times finally pushing himself all the way into her and throwing his head back with a loud growl he exploded deep inside of her.  For several minutes they could both feel him spurting inside of her still.


They collapsed onto the bed trying to regulate their breathing.


Mark wrapped me up tight into his arms and kissed the top of my head...he said, “You know something I love you Jillian...I don’t want you to decide right now...take a week or so...but I want you to marry me...I want us to have a family together and grow old together...”


I sat up and looked at Mark and said, “I love you too Mark.”  Mark watched as Jillian put his t-shirt on and stood in the door way looking at him...


It was silent for a few minutes, “...But I can’t marry you.”


Jillian disappeared out of the door.


Chapter 17

**Warning Content may offend some**


Mark couldn’t believe what he had just heard…


Mark got up out of bed and pulled his jeans on and walked out of the bedroom and into a dark hallway and started searching for Jillian.


Mark walked down stairs and saw a silhouette on the couch side ways looking out the huge bay window.  Mark walked over and sat on the couch next to Jillian, and touched her knee...she turned her face towards him and had a river of tears streaming down her cheeks.  She automatically wrapped her arms around his neck and started crying harder. 


Mark smoothed her hair over her neck and back while whispering soothing words in her ear.  A few minutes later she calmed down and backed away from him...she looked down as her hair fell in her face...


Mark watched as she looked at her restraint covered wrists...she looked back up into Mark’s eyes...her crystal blue eyes were kept familiar in his mind...but he couldn’t think why or how...he watched as she tried to speak a few times and finally let her tongue slip between her lips to moisten them and she said, “I’m ready for that talk now.” 


Mark nodded and said, “Okay...I’m listening.”


I turned completely around and was facing the back of the couch on my knees...looking out the window...


I said, “I never knew my biological father...I heard horror stories about him beating my mother while they were married and all through her pregnancy with me...and he took off some time after I was born and turned up dead one night...Obviously to a father I never knew it wasn’t really that big of a loss to me...I was 14 when my mother met Jack...he was this incredible guy who swooped down out of the heavens above and swept my mother off her feet.  He’s been the ONLY man I’ve ever considered a father...even if he was just a step-father.”


I swallowed hard and continued, “Jack had a son the same age as me...and we’d been friends growing up...my mom just never realize Brian’s dad was Jack.  Anyways, they married and we learn to become a big Brady bunch family fast...and it was fun...I finally felt I had a complete family I’d been missing all those years...I was 16, and Brian and I had gotten into an argument...I had told him the girl he was dating was nothing but a big slut...he got really mad...madder then anyone had ever seen him...madder then I’d ever seen him.”


Tears slid down my cheeks again and I said, “Suddenly, before I knew what was happening...He threw me down on the ground and ripped my clothes from my body and started raping me...he covered my mouth so no one could hear me screaming and crying...he belittled me, and called me harsh names...when he was finished he just left...A few days later, he came to me and cried...he apologized and said he was going to get help for it...he’d been using steroids, and didn’t realize how bad his temper was flaring until the night he went off on me.”


Mark watched her get quiet and said, “You want to continue Jillian?”


I nodded yes.


I had the sniffles trying to keep myself from crying again.


Chapter 18

**Warning Content may offend some**


I said, “3 Months later, I found out I was pregnant...I knew I couldn’t have a baby, I was only 16, and plus I was pregnant from my step-brother...I felt dirty and disgusting...I hadn’t told anyone what had happened...I didn’t dare.  Jack would of killed Brian...I had been working, so I had enough money saved up...I went and had an abortion done...but I felt so guilty about killing another life...I hated it...but...I hated myself more...”


Mark handed me a tissue and I whipped my eyes and continued, “My friends had noticed me change in attitude so one night they took me to a 16 and older club...my best friend Delia found me in the bathroom...nursing a bottle of Jack Daniels...I’d asked someone to buy it for me.  She made me tell her what was wrong...it all came out...She looked at me and told me it wasn’t my fault...I knew that...but I couldn’t help but think other wise.  She hadn’t been the one who killed a tiny baby who couldn’t defend it’s self in a world it would never see.”


I covered my mouth with my hand...and felt Mark’s huge hand in the middle of my back and he rubbed up and down...trying to soothe me...and comfort me.


I regained my composure and said, “I ended up slinging the bottle across the bathroom and smashing it into a bunch of pieces...I walked over and just looked at the pieces of glass on the floor...For some reason I picked a piece up and slid through the window in the ladies room...and I stood and leaned against the back wall behind the club...I looked down at my stomach and suddenly felt so nauseas I just wanted the pain to stop...I wanted the heart ache and the physical hurt to be over...”


I inhaled and exhaled deep and continued, “I cut my right wrist with the glass...and watched as the blood poured out of it...but it didn’t look like blood to me...just water flowing like a river that someone put red food coloring in.  And nothing was happening...so I cut my left wrist...I was waiting to die...I had heard if you cut your wrists good each that you’d die from it...I cut my right wrist again pushed the sharp glass into the cut deeper and deeper...but I couldn’t feel it...I was numb...I couldn’t feel the pain anymore...I cut my left wrist again just as deep as my right...I just stood there and watched the blood flow from me...it was like a never ending stream.”


Mark said, “Then what happened?”  I said, “I don’t know...I woke up the next morning in a hospital bed, my wrists had been surgically repaired and tapped up and they had hospital bed restraints on me, so I couldn’t harm myself again...The doctor said some guy found me in a parking lot and brought me in...I must’ve walked around to the front of the club and passed out...I was later taken to the psychiatric ward of the hospital...2 years later when I was released...I changed my name and started my life over...I’ve never been back...not even to see my mom...”


I looked at Mark and said, “I can’t marry you Mark because I can’t have kids...the doctor told me the abortionist did a choppy job...and fucked a lot of my insides up...I don’t want you to marry me because I can’t get pregnant...and I don’t want you to marry me out of pity.  I’ll never be able to give you a family of your own.”


Mark pulled me over and kissed my temple and said, “We’re going to get married, and it’s not out of pity, because you can’t get pregnant with my babies...We’re getting married, because I loved you before I knew what happened and I still love you and because some where in this country there are plenty of kids who could always use a good home...with two loving parents...who will love them as unconditional as they love each other.”


Mark picked up my hand and said, “Is that why you wear these straints?  Because you hadn’t told Glenn...and didn’t want him to see the scars.”  I nodded yes. 


Mark slowly pulled the Velcro side down and unwrapped my wrist and pulled the fingerless glove part off...and flipped my hand over and saw the scars on my left wrist...He ran his finger over it feeling it, touching it...then I watched as he leaned down and placed feather soft kisses along the scar...then repeated the same thing on my other wrist.


I couldn’t believe what Mark had said, and the physical things he’d done to me...I really loved him...and he really loved me.


A week later, we got married.


Chapter 19

**Smut Warning**


After we were married Mark looked at the wedding certificate and said, “Maybe we should put your real name on it...I don’t want people thinking we were never really married...besides if Jillian isn’t your real name...what is it?”


I looked up at Mark and said, “Loraina...but most people just called me Lori.  And actually my really name was already put on it and I signed it...look again.”  Mark said, “Wait a minute...where did that come from?”  I giggled and said, “Well...That’s why I had the reverend make us sign two...and I replaced the bad one with the legal one.”


Mark kissed the top of my head and said, “See another good reason to be married to you.”  I looked up and said, “You never needed a reason to marry me.  You had me from the first day with that voice and cologne...”


Later that night, I was in the tub soaking and Mark peeked his head in and said, “Hey I’ve got something to talk with you about...Meet me in the living room in 30 minutes.”  I said, “Okay...I’ll be there.”  I got out of the tub and dried off and pulled on my sleep shorts and tank top.  I walked down stairs and Mark was sitting on the couch watching TV...I walked over and turned the TV off and said, “So what’s up?”  I slowly crawled onto him and sat straddled on his lap. 


He grabbed my thighs and pulled me closer and we kissed a few hundred times and then he said, “I have to go back on the road in a couple of weeks...and I would really love for you to come with me...I hate the thought of leaving my beautiful wife here alone...So I want you to think about coming with me...I would love to have you with me.”


I said, “You don’t have to ask me...you want me to come with you then I will.”  I started slowly kissing up his neck and got to his ear and said, “Kind of like portable pussy huh?”  Mark groaned and said, “Oh yea baby...”


Mark felt Lori’s hands sliding down his chest to his belt and felt her unbuckle his belt and then unbutton his jeans, and unzip them...as her hand slowly slid into the front of his jeans...he was instantly aroused by the contact...and chuckled a little when she smiled and said, “Commando huh?  Now that’s how I like my man...”  Referring to him not wearing underwear.


Mark’s hands made their way under my tank top as he pulled it up and off my body...Mark’s hands found my lace sleep shorts covered ass and he said, “Talk about the way you like your man...you keep wearing those and you’ll be the death of me yet.” 


Mark watched as Lori giggled and got off his lap and with her ass facing him on the couch on her hands and knees, she looked back and said, “So you like these panties huh?”  Mark slid his hand up the leg of her panties and his hand went from her ass check and down as his fingers slid down her soaking slit...and he pushed a couple of fingers into her core and got a throaty moan from his wife.  He heard her fingernails scratch against the couch material as she balled her fists up.


Oh yea she wanted him...and they both knew it.


Mark said, “Don’t move baby.”  He got up and slowly leaned over Lori and took her wrists in his hands, and moved her around to face the back of the couch, as he cupped her pussy and pulled her pelvis back while letting his finger brush against her clit.  She groaned again and he said, “I know baby...I just love to hear you moan.”


Mark stood behind Lori and freed his cock all the way as he pushed her over a little and moved her panties and slid himself into her and she moaned low at the contact.  Mark let her get used to his size...as he gripped her hips and she stood on her knees and leaned back against his chest and looked up and he dipped his head down and she sucked his tongue into her mouth and caressed it with her own.


Mark could hear her pleas and moans to go faster...and he almost hesitated not too...he didn’t want to hurt her...but thought...’whatever she wants, she gets.’...


Mark gripped her hips and started to thrust into her faster and harder...her moans were music to his ears...she said, “Oh...Oh God Mark...you feel so good inside of me.”  Her hands covered his on her hips...and he bent over her back and kissed down her spine while still pumping inside of her hard and fast.  He pushed one of her legs out a little more and was able to thrust deeper into her....


I let out a deep moan as I felt my orgasm ripping through my body...




Mark gripped her hips a little tighter when he felt her cum on his shaft it was his undoing...she thrusted into her one last time and with a deep growl he exploded inside of her.


After our breathing was back under control...Mark turned me around pulled me into his arms and kissed me with a fevered pitch...and then lifted me into his arms and took me to bed for the night.


Chapter 20


A couple of weeks later, we were at the arena in New York...Madison Square Garden, MSG.  Mark had the writers put me in his script...it was a Monday Night Raw...and Mark wanted me to be on the back of his bike when he rode down for his come back to the ring.  I refused to say no.


So the wardrobe lady measured me and made me a Deadman Inc tank top...I pulled it on with my jeans and black steel toed boots...and pulled my hair up into a pony tail.  Mark had on his jeans, Deadman Inc T-shirt on, black boots and black fingerless gloves.


The pulled Mark’s huge titan up and He swung his leg over it and sat down and took my hand and helped me on...I snuggled in close behind him and wrapped my arms around his chest...He kissed my hands and we took off down the hallway and then his music started blaring through the speaker as it echoed in the arena...


The fans went completely crazy.  Glenn and Mia were sitting in the dressing room...when they heard Mark’s music come on they looked at the monitor...what they saw next nearly gave them both a heart attack...Jillian was riding on the back of Mark’s Bike.


I stood off to the side and clapped, bounced up and down and yelled my ass off for Mark as he demolished the guy in the ring.  We got back on and went back to the back...when we got to the dressing room; Glenn and Mia were standing there.  We walked in as they followed us...Glenn slammed the door so hard it shook the fake foam panel ceiling.


Glenn said, “Jillian what the fuck are you doing here...and what the fuck are you doing with Mark?”  I was looking at a magazine when Glenn growled my name again and I looked up and said, “Sorry was you speaking to me?”  Glenn said, “You know good and well I was speaking to you.”  I said, “Oh I’m sorry, I figured since I was married I didn’t have to answer to someone who wasn’t my husband...Do I Mark?” 


Mark looked out the bathroom door and said, “No you don’t baby.”  And then went back to take a shower.  Mia said, “If you’ll excuse me I have something to discuss with my ex-husband.”


I said, “Lady, and I use that term loosely...If you take another step in the direction of that shower room where my husband is...I’ll not only kick your ass down to your own dressing room, but once I get you there I’ll shave you bald so you can be the identical match to your husband.”


Glenn said, “What do you mean husband?  You and Mark are married?  Since when...What happened to us...You disappeared 2 years ago and now you reappear and you’re married to my best friend.”


I said, “What do you mean...you’re the one who hadn’t stopped dating yet...Glenn, there was no us...there was me...and then there was you and Mia...Do you really think I was that stupid...I will admit at first I was trying to pretend it really wasn’t happening...the love of my life wasn’t really fucking some ex-girlfriend from high school...some sloppy second from his best friend who...by the way was still married to Mark when you guys first started fucking around...”


Glenn looked at me shocked like ‘how did I find out’... I scoffed and said, “I wasn’t completely deluded to the fact that you was fucking her...That last night I was with you on the road...I smelled her all over you...When they were passing out brains you got skipped, because you fucked her and didn’t have enough brains in your fuckin’ head to shower before you crawled into bed with me...like I wouldn’t notice you smelled like another woman’s pussy.”


Glenn started to say something...but I said, “Just leave Glenn...and take your...... wife with you...Mark has been asked to be moved to Smackdown...So that’s where were going...I say we, because he’s my husband...he’s got more loyalty in his little finger, then you’ve got brains.  And I refuse to waste any more breath or time on this conversation...I said what I wanted to say to you...so now you two can make your exit...I’m going to go join my husband in the shower.”


“Oh...By the way...for future notice, my name is Lori not Jillian...and you’d know that if you would have stuck around long enough to get to know me better.”  I watched as Glenn and Mia left...I walked over and locked the door.  And joined Mark in the shower...


Laying in bed later that night, I said, “Mark...Guess what?”  Mark looked down at me and said, “What baby?”  I propped my elbow on his chest and my head on my hand and said, “The doctors were wrong...I can get pregnant.”  He said, “That’s great babe...When did you find that out?” 


I smiled and said, “Right after I took a home pregnancy test and it came back positive...So if you don’t mind...I would like to take back over the roll of having your babies.”  Mark said, “Did you go to the doctor?”  I nodded and said, “Yea...he confirmed it.  I’m pregnant.”  Mark smiled and pulled me up to him and kissed me deep...He said, “I can’t wait to see him.”  I smacked his arm and said, “Him? ...Her.”  Mark said, “Nope...I want a boy first.”  I said, “Well you can discuss it with my body.” 


Mark rolled us over and said, “I’ve got a better idea...let’s go ahead and make sure it’s a boy.”  I said, “Okay...What’ca got in mind?”  Mark chuckled and said, “A little of this and a little of that.”


Mark said, “God I love you.”  I smiled and said, “I love you too.”


As Mark kissed my lips he put his hand underneath me and slid his already hard erection into me…I groaned into his mouth at the feeling of his fullness being in me...Mark laid between my thighs…As we made slow passionate love.


Once you start falling...it’s always great to have someone there to fall with.


The End