This Is Me You’re Talking Too

This was bound to happen

It was just a matter of time

This is just too small

For us to really say goodbye

Chaise knew she should have taken herself as far away from Texas as possible. But she hadn’t. She’d come to love her adopted home state far more then she’d have thought possible. Factor in her divorce was just recently finished, it hadn’t seemed prudent to move without seeing the affair through.

She should have left the second the judge decreed her and Mark no longer husband and wife.

Now it was several months later and she was standing next to a fruit stall at the town’s outdoor market, staring at her now ex-husband.

Mark.

He towered over the people that surrounded them, the many going about their lives unaware of the angst between the two standing stationary. His green eyes quickly took Chaise in, everything from the tips of her worn out boots to the sunglasses resting precariously on her forehead.

Finally, she cleared her throat, offering him an awkward smile. Honestly, this was ridiculous. They’d been married for three years, surely something as easy as an accidental public meeting wasn’t going to intimidate her.

Much.

“Hello.” He offered softly, his voice carrying across the few feet that separated them easily.

“Hi.”

You’re smiling that smile

That you get when you’re nervous

Like you don’t quite know what to do

But this is me you’re talking to

This is me you’re talking to

A somewhat bemused smile graced Mark’s thin, sensual lips. It was a smile most weren’t familiar with though Chaise recognized it. It was his I’m-not-sure-what-I’m-supposed-to-do smile. The last time she seen it was when one of the girls had asked him where babies came from.

“So, um…” She folded her arms over her chest, her hands unconsciously rubbing her arms.

“Let’s get a drink.” Mark suggested, gesturing to the small café across the street. He didn’t wait for her to agree, just gently took Chaise by the arm and lead the way.

Once seated in a booth, staring anywhere but at each other, and their drinks in front of them, they fell into uneasy silence.

“How- how are the girls?” Chaise finally ventured, sipping her soda just for something to do.

“Fine, adjusting. Took them awhile but they understand. Or at least they say they do. You know how they are.”

“School should take their minds off of… things.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.”

I’ve heard you met somebody

It didn’t take you very long

And I’ll admit it isn’t easy

Knowing you’ve moved on

Mark finally said something that had been nagging him since he’d lain eyes on her. “Heard a rumor you and Steve were datin’.”

Chaise looked surprised for a moment before slowly nodding. “Yeah, for a few weeks now. How’d you hear?”

“Darlin’, please…”

She smiled slightly, look both apologetic and somewhat shy. “He’s nice.” She whispered.

“I’d imagine.” Mark didn’t expound on his current thoughts. Suddenly, every bad thing he had ever heard about Steve Austin came rushing to the forefront of his mind, pushing aside the fact that he had known this man for over a decade.

Chaise fell silent again.

He watched her drum her fingers on the Formica tabletop, wondering if maybe he had gone down the wrong track. Common sense told him her current relationship wasn’t a community topic between them, that kind of intimacy was long gone between the pair.

Not that it didn’t bother him she was dating already. Especially one of his coworkers. How ironic was that? His marriage had been destroyed by him and his own infidelities with one of his coworkers, now he was irked by the fact that she was dating one.

Life was a bitch.

But I can see

How you could make any woman

Fall deep in love with you

This is me you’re talking to

“Are you still seeing Michelle?” Chaise asked, turning the tables on him.

Mark shook his head. “No, not for some time. She uh,” He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “After we separated, she got some notions in her head bout me marryin’ her and all that.”

“You made the poor girl fall in love with you.” Current ex-wife teased, though the humor didn’t reach her eyes.

“Not intentionally.”

“It happens. You’re easy to fall in love with.”

“And easy to fall out of love with.” Was his bitter response.

Chaise felt her heart give a painful twinge.

Me, the one who really knows you

Me, the one whose heart you’ve broken

Me, the one who was still hopin’

You might be missing me

This was stupidity at it’s finest. Mark felt like putting his head straight through the window he was sitting next too. What in the name of all that was holy had made him say that? He hadn’t wanted Chaise to think anything but he was living the perfect life.

He snorted into his beer.

Uncomfortable. That was the only word that came to mind and it probably wasn’t even the most accurate. Sighing inwardly, Chaise traced a finger along the tabletop, not even sure what to say at this point. Mark had revealed so much with that one sentence.

We don’t have to do this

We don’t have to act like friends

As much as I would love to

I really just don’t think I can

Finally unable to deal with the tension anymore, Chaise stood up. She reached into her pocket and pulled out some loose ones, tossing them down onto the table. “Here, for the drinks.” She said, not looking at Mark.

He instantly got to his feet, catching her by the arm before she could take off. “Chaise, what’s the rush?” He asked softly, knowing damn well what it was but unable to help himself.

“Mark, this is stupid.” She whispered, not wanting to draw any attention to them. Not that he wasn’t doing it by himself with his sheer size alone. “We’re sitting here pretending we’re friends when we’re not.”

Mark raked a hand over his head and down the plait holding his hair in place. “I know things will never be the same but that don’t mean we can’t try for some sort of middle ground.”

“To be honest, I just don’t think I can.”

You don’t have to tell me

That you really love me

After all we have been through

‘Cause this is me you’re talking to

Mark stepped aside to give her passing room. The scent of her vanilla body spray permeated his sense and he almost closed his eyes. He followed her out into the bright sunlight, wondering how anything could be right in the world when he was so miserable.

So this is how she felt during the majority of their marriage.

Chaise walked across the road, aware he had fallen into step with her and stuffed her hands into her pockets. “We know each other well enough to not try insulting ourselves by pretending, Mark.” She said finally. “We can’t sit and have a normal conversation because all we do is ask each other personal questions and wonder about things we have no reason to be wondering about.”

“Does the fact that I still have feelin’s for you change any of what you just said?”

She almost hesitated. “No.”

“Or the fact that you still have feelin’s for me?”

“Definitely not, I divorced you now didn’t I?”

Me, the one who really knows you

Me, the one who heart you’ve broken

Me, the one who was still hopin’

You might be missing me

“Yeah, you divorced me.”

“Mark, I’m sorry but this is how it is. You fooled around on me, I divorced you.” Chaise said firmly, apparently steeling herself against him. “I’m glad you’ve realized what I knew all along, but it’s just too late.”

“And what’s that I’ve realized?” He demanded, anger lacing his tone.

“That you love me.” She said simply, staring up at him.

He opened his mouth to deny it but Chaise just shook her head, smiling sadly.

“This is me you’re talking to.” She whispered. “Me.”

Oh, and you don’t have to say that you do

This is me you’re talking to

This is me you’re talking to