All she could do was stare out into the night sky as memories washed over her, wrapping her arms around her body as the loneliness seeped in. 


It’d been six months since she left him, six months since she’d finally walked away with her broken heart, needing to mend it back together.  She knew what she’d gotten herself into when she first met him and started getting involved, but couldn’t stop herself from doing so.  The way his dimples shined whenever he smiled took her breath away; Ashley didn’t stand a chance against resisting him.


When she took the job as John Cena’s publicist for everything he did, Ashley had no idea what she’d gotten herself into.  It wasn’t just working for the wrestling aspect of his career, but also the movies and music he produced.  It was her job to generate and manage publicity for him along with making all of his travel plans and appearances, basically taking care of all his headaches. 


She wasn’t his personal assistant, Ashley did have other clients she worked for in Hollywood, but did most of those via laptop and cell phone.  Because of how clean-cut and responsible she was at her job, her other clients didn’t mind her traveling with the WWE, which was one of the stipulations in taking on John Cena as one of her clients.  It generated a lot of money for the company she worked for, which was located in Los Angeles, her boss basically tossing her into this because it was once in a lifetime opportunity.  John Cena was a mega-superstar that surprisingly generated more money for the company than any of her other clients, so therefore he was on top of her list.


The fact Ashley didn’t know a thing about the sports-entertainment business only further cemented her professionalism and Vince McMahon immediately hired her on.  He liked the fact she wasn’t a wrestling fan because that meant she wouldn’t be all doe-eyed over his WWE Superstar and would be able to do her job without getting distracted.  Ashley was John’s fourth publicist Vince hired, the other three too doe-eyed and distracted to do the job properly, not to mention trying to have sex with John.


So when Ashley walked into WWE headquarters in Stamford, Connecticut to meet her new client, she was not prepared for the amount of attraction she’d instantly feel toward John Cena.  He was gorgeous from head to toe, wearing one of his patent WWE t-shirts with a pair of black cargo shorts that hung low on his hips, a hat on his head backwards with black and white sneakers on his feet.  Ashley literally had to teach herself how to breathe again, especially when his hand swallowed hers whole when they were introduced by Vince McMahon.  Instantly, electricity shot up her arm and Ashley was almost certain John felt it too, her jade green eyes locking with his, both of them thankful Vince hadn’t noticed it.


Ashley’s cheeks burned the more she thought about her first encounter with John, smiling at the memory.  It took every ounce of energy inside of her not to completely breakdown every time John popped into her head.  Though Ashley did give herself some credit for not automatically jumping into bed with him because that’s all she wanted to really do from the moment they met.


Those thoughts were severed when Ashley’s cell phone began ringing, knowing it was probably one of her clients needing something.  Being a publicist was beginning to be a pain in the ass, but it did pay well so Ashley couldn’t complain too much.  She needed a job and had the opportunity to work with some pretty big names in the Hollywood business.




“Hey Ash.”


Ashley nearly dropped her cell phone at the sound of John’s voice in her ear, eyes widening.



Well it’s good to hear your voice

I hope you’re doing fine

And if you ever wondered

I’m lonely here tonight


I’m lost here in this moment

And time keeps slipping by

And if I could have just one wish

I’d have you by my side



“Please don’t hang up.”


Ashley sighed, he knew her too well sometimes because she was ready to snap her cell phone shut. “What do you want, John?” She asked with great reluctance, closing her eyes to keep the budding tears in.


She hadn’t heard from him in six months, why was he suddenly calling her out of the blue like this?  Did he have some kind of radar that told him whenever she was thinking of him?  What could he possibly have to say to her after all this time?


Running a hand through his short dark brown hair, John honestly had no answer for her, wondering that himself. “Just wanted to hear your voice.” That was the only thing he could really say, waiting for the dial tone to sound in his ear.


Now Ashley was really confused. “My voice?” She echoed, scratching her head as she walked away from her balcony, chewing her bottom lip. “You’re being serious aren’t you?  Because, if memory serves me correctly, you didn’t want me around anymore, which is why I left.  So you calling to hear my voice really throws me for a loop, what the hell do you want?”


“I never told you to leave.” John stated, refusing to get upset because it’d taken him this long to get up the nerve to call her. “I told you to leave if you couldn’t handle how things were, Ash.”


The tears began flowing and Ashley had to stop herself from chucking the phone across the living room, trembling slightly. “You act as if I wanted to leave.  All I wanted was to be with you and you told me if I couldn’t handle how things were that I had to leave.  It was very hard for me to leave you and the company, John!  You act as if it was the easiest thing in the world!”


He remembered their argument the night Ashley decided to leave because she couldn’t handle how things were between them anymore.  The professionalism had gone out the window when John started pursuing her.  At first, he thought Ashley would be like all the other publicists and try jumping his bones, floored when she didn’t.  She remained completely professional in every way, never once giving any indication that she wanted him, so John took things into his own hands to test the waters so to speak.


First, he began pulling her into dark dressing rooms, whether it was in an arena to wrestle that night or on a movie set, and would ravage her body from head to toe in pure darkness.  He didn’t want her to know it was him and Ashley fought him off at first, but John had overpowered her in every way.  Somehow, Ashley knew it was John because of his scent and how muscular he was.  There was nobody, to her knowledge, that had muscle mass quite like him. 


Instead of telling him flat out she knew who he was, Ashley just continued with the game…that was until John tried having sex with her in the dressing room during one of their encounters.  Up until that time, all John did was caress her body and even made her orgasm with his huge fingers, but never moved to the next step and never let her return the favor.  She stopped him by using his name and told him bluntly if he wanted to have sex with her, he would take her to his hotel room and do it right.


John did not hesitate and carted her off for a night of unforgettable unbridled hot sex that still made Ashley shiver whenever she thought about it…



Oh, oh I miss you

Oh, oh I need you


And I love you more than I did before

And if today I don’t see your face

Nothing’s changed, no one can take your place

It gets harder every day




“Leave if you can’t handle it, Ashley!!”


Tears streamed down her cheeks, green eyes wide with so much heartbreak swirling through them, wondering if she’d heard him correctly. “John…” She reached out to touch his arm, only for him to shrug her off. “This is just as hard for me, if not more, than it is for you!!”


John scoffed, rolling his eyes. “You knew who I was from the beginning.  You knew I couldn’t fully commit to you and you kept coming back!  So don’t stand there now acting all hurt and broken hearted!” He growled, watching as she shoved clothes into her bag and stopped her because his own heart was breaking.


“Let go of me!!” Ashley cried out, struggling against him as more tears fell. “You don’t want me here!  You said it yourself!”


Gritting his teeth, John yanked her against his muscular bare chest, forcing the breath out of her for a second, his blue eyes blazing with so many emotions. “I never fuckin’ said that.” He practically snarled in her face and saw the fear swimming through her eyes, releasing her with a grunt. “Leave if you want then, not like I can’t find another piece of easy ass to fuck.”


Those words were nearly Ashley’s ending, her heart splitting open with so much pain, she wasn’t sure if it would ever go away.  She hastily packed the rest of her things and rushed out the door, tears flying behind her, not seeing John watching her retreat.  John was right as much as she hated admitting it while riding the elevator down to the lobby; he could find another woman to have in his bed.  Women threw themselves at him on a daily basis, but John denied them simply because he already had an easy lay with Ashley.


Easy lay.


That’s all he ever thought of her and nothing would change as long as she stayed with him.  Ashley turned her key card in to the receptionist with tears still falling down her face before heading out into the cool night, her cab waiting for her.  She requested the driver to take her to the airport and closed her eyes as the cab pulled away from the hotel.  Home back to Los Angeles is where she was going, far away from John Cena, to mend her broken heart.


Ashley never saw John rush out of the hotel building doors and chased after her cab, but he was too late to stop her.



Say you love me more than you did before

And I’m sorry it’s this way

But I’m coming home, I’ll be coming home

And if you ask me, I will stay, I will stay


Well I tried to live without you

The tears fall from my eyes

I’m alone and I feel empty

God I’m torn apart inside


I look up at the stars

Hoping you’re doing the same

And somehow I feel closer

And I can hear you say




John hated thinking about the night Ashley left and what he said to her, regretting it every single day she wasn’t beside him as his publicist.  Now he was stuck with a snob bleach blonde bimbo that didn’t know her head from her ass and tried getting into his bed on a nightly basis.  Ashley never did such a thing, John had to pursue her -he didn’t regret doing it- and ended up falling in love with her in the process.


Love was definitely not in his pursuing plan, but after Ashley left, John realized he didn’t want anyone else except her.


“I don’t wanna argue with you, Ash.” John murmured, not meaning to upset her with this phone call. “What happened, happened and we can’t change it.  All we can do is move forward.”


“You’re right.” Ashley sniffled, trying not to show her emotions, but John always managed to push them out of her. “I am moving forward and that’s why I left…in order to move forward away from you.”


That hurt. 



Oh, oh I miss you

Oh, oh I need you


I love you more than I did before

And if today I don’t see your face

Nothing’s changed, no one can take your place

It gets harder every day


Say you love me more than you did before

And I’m sorry it’s this way

But I’m coming home, I’ll be coming home

And if you ask me, I will stay, I will stay, always stay



John didn’t blame her for feeling the way she did and he deserved exactly what she said, but that still didn’t make it any easier to hear those poisonous words. “I came after you that night.” He had nothing else to lose and John figured if he had the slightest chance at getting her back, he would have to be brutally honest. “I chased your cab three blocks and even went to the airport, but I was too late.  I wanted to stop you, but you were too fast for me…”


“Why would you come after me?” This was new to Ashley and she could feel her heart skip a beat, breathing a little heavier. “I thought you wanted me to leave?”


“That’s not what I wanted, Ash.  Not for a second.” John stated, truly meaning what he said, even after six long months of no contact with her. “I’ve always wanted you to stay with me.  I want you back.”


Ashley wiped the tears from her eyes, wishing he would’ve said these words six months ago to avoid all the pain and suffering she’d gone through. “I wanted to stay with you, but you made it sound like you never wanted anything more from me than just sex.  You even told me if I couldn’t handle it, that I should leave and that’s why I did.”


John knew she was crying and it ripped him apart to know it was because of him.  He absolutely hated seeing her cry, it was one of the things he couldn’t stand to watch.  Whenever Ashley cried, which wasn’t often, John had to either step away to give her space or pull her into his arms to get her mind off of whatever bothered her.  He didn’t realize that most of the tears she had shed was because of him while being his publicist.


“Please don’t cry, Ashley.”


“I can’t help it and you know it.” She shot back through sniffles, hating herself for being so weak. “I have to go, John.”


Before John could utter another word, Ashley had closed her cell phone after shutting it off because she knew he’d call back.  She had to remain strong against him or else he would pull her right back into his clutches and Ashley wasn’t sure her heart could withstand much more pain.  Just as she headed toward her bedroom to get some sleep, a knock sounded at her front door, a frown crossing her face.


Who could be at her door this late at night?



I never wanna lose you

And if I had to, I would choose you

So always stay, please, always stay

You’re the one that I hold on to

‘Cause my heart would stop without you



When Ashley opened the door, she froze at the sight of John standing before her in all his gorgeous glory.  Those blue eyes were still captivating as ever and Ashley found herself completely speechless.  What was he doing here and, more importantly, how did he find out where she lived?  All she could do was stand there frozen, feeling as though her feet were cemented to the carpet below, unable to move or form any words to come out of her mouth.


John had been on her front porch during the whole conversation they had, having it planned to tell her to open her door to surprise her.  But he hadn’t counted on them arguing and her crying, that wasn’t why he came to see her.  It took quite a bit for John to find out where she lived, finally having to call the office she worked out of in Los Angeles and pretended to be someone important who had to get a hold of her immediately.  That was after he got his head out of his rear, stopped being stubborn and realized that he was completely in love and couldn’t live without her.


“Gonna invite me in?” He asked almost hesitantly, standing in there in a pair of baggy dark green cargo shorts and one of his t-shirts from the WWE that said ‘Rise Against Hate’ on it. “It’s chilly out here, babe.”


All Ashley could do was step aside and let him in, even though what she really wanted to do was slam the door in his face.  She watched as he slipped his sneakers off and that somehow snapped her out of her shock, feeling her eyes narrow at him.  Who the hell did he think he was just showing up out of the blue like this?


“You’re not staying here.” Ashley sternly stated, stalking past him toward the kitchen, needing some water since her mouth was incredibly dry. “What the hell are you doing here, John?”


He didn’t say anything at first and simply followed her into the kitchen, standing right behind her while she filled a glass of water. “I’m coming home to you, Ash.” He wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder, feeling her tense against him. “I wanna stay with you.  I don’t care about anything else, none of it matters anymore.  I’ve been miserable without you for the past six months and I know you’ve been the same way.  So stop fighting me, accept my apology and turn around so I can show you how much you mean to me.”


Ashley snorted, wondering if he was talking out of his ass or actually meant what he said, setting her glass of water aside. “How do I know you’re not full of shit and just saying these things to get in my panties one last time?” She demanded, trying to keep the sternness in her voice, but it all came out softly. “How do I know you’re not gonna break my heart again, John?”



I love you more than I did before

And if today I don’t see your face

Nothing’s changed, no one can take your place

It gets harder every day


Say you love me more than you did before

And I’m sorry that it’s this way

But I’m coming home, I’ll be coming home

And if you ask me, I will stay, I will stay, I’ll always stay



Slowly turning her around, John locked his blue eyes with tear-filled jade and immediately wiped away the stray tears that fell with the pads of his thumbs. “Because I realized something after you left, something that hasn’t changed and never will.” He wrapped one arm around her waist, pressing her body fully against his and bit back a groan at the contact.


“What is that?” Ashley whispered, not trusting her voice at the moment, his eyes and sound of his voice nearly taking her breath away like it always did.


“That I love you, I’m in love with you and if you give me another chance, I swear to you I won’t fuck it up.  I’ll stay with you as long as you want me and all you have to do is ask.  Just ask me to stay.”


More tears fell when Ashley heard his confession, searching his eyes for any indication that he was lying to her.  She found absolutely nothing except unconditional love and sorrow, feeling her heart already mending back into place.  She was back where she belonged in his arms and, instead of answering him, Ashley cupped his face with her soft hands, pulling his lips down to meet hers in a passionate soul-searing kiss that made both of their toes curl.


“I love you too, John.” She breathed as soon as the kiss broke, only when they needed air, his soft lips instantly capturing hers again. “Please stay with me.” Ashley mumbled against his lips, giggling when he growled softly against her.


John smiled against her mumbled request and swept her off her feet, carting her out of the kitchen toward the bedroom, ready to show her how much he really loved her and would stay with her for as long as she wanted.





And I love you more than I did before

And I’m sorry that it’s this way

But I’m coming home, I’ll be coming home

And if you ask, I will stay, I will stay, I will stay



The End.