The scene opens backstage of the EWC arena where the VP, "The F'n Boss" TJ Hicks and "Bad Ass" Matt Covey are standing next to a soda machine. The duo had decided to get to the arena early this morning and get their work out in before Rage, (though neither has a match). The two have been discussing the reaction they got recently from their "terrorist" dress-up act when The Boss suddenly glances down at his watch.
The Boss: Hey! It's time for Friday morning "Beat Down".
Bad Ass: Come on, we live the shows, do we really need to re-watch them?
The Boss: Hey, come on; you never know what might've happened when you was lounging around thinking everything was hunky-dory.
Bad Ass: What the hell are you talking about? Nobody, besides Crusher, has the guts to say sh*t about the Bad Ass. Besides, I just want to get ready for a beatdown or something...
The Boss: Too bad.
The Boss and Bad Ass walk down the hallway and into the VIP room of the arena. They enter the room and then seat themselves on a large vinyl sofa where Kaly happens to be waiting...watching Law & Order. The Boss walks up half cocky and flips the channel over to the Xtreme Network. And thus Kaly leaps out of her seat, spearing him to the floor.
Kaly: What do you think you're doing?
The Boss: Hey! We came in here to watch Friday morning "Beat Down"!
Kaly: Why? You live the damned show!
Bad Ass: That's what I said...
TJ looks over them both and rolls Kaly aside, straightening his tie.
The Boss: I'm the Boss, it doesn't have to make sense! Besides, this is my office, and my tv!
Kaly stares wickedly over her husband, watching him as he glances back...shivering. He then walks up to her, embracing her tightly and taking her back for a dip.
The Boss: I'm sorry. I did not mean to be so rough with you, my love.
Kaly: What's wrong with you?
The Boss: I'm The Boss, it doesn't have to make sense!
The Boss drops Kaly back onto the floor and takes his seat before the TV just as "Beat Down" hits the air waves to "School of Harknocks" by POD. The Boss begins shaking his head to the opening intro and Bad Ass stares at the screen in a stupor; watching as endless footage from the past re-plays before him in two second intervals. And it all ends abruptly with footage of Allen Smith, Jay Cee, and Crusher back in the Sudden Impact days, holding their hands high before fading to the letters EWC.
The Boss: Ha, ha. This is a great show!
Bad Ass: What the f*ck was that? WHAT THE F*CK WAS THAT?
The Boss: Here we go...
Bad Ass: First off, they steal my original entrance music. Next I happen to count three scenes where I'm getting my ass kicked! And last but not least, the intro is so whack-ass and so not-updated, that they're still showing Sudden Impact as they were!
The Boss: Well obviously they're not going to just change it every time...
Bad Ass: And then they have the fortitude to go and show all of this good crap about everyone else, but when it comes to myself, or Jay Cee, or Nick Lopez; they show us getting our asses kicked. Watch! I tell you they paint us as the biggest protagonists since the begining of time!
The Boss: Well we are kind of the heels...
Bad Ass: Whatever.
The two begin watching when it immediately begins to breakdown the most current in EWC events. The show being hoste by Ryan Cole of course.
Ryan Cole: Welcome once again to "Beat Down" folks. Ryan Cole here bringing to you what has been a great week in sports entertainment for the EWC. Beginning with what appears to be a new shocker for wrestling fans... A new stable to replace the J.O.B Squad. You heard me right. It seems former no-bodies, "Jigga Man" Al Covey, Da Playa, and Stryfe have come together to form what critics are calling, "Hells Union". Already we have seen them make their targets...The Corporation!
The scene changes two days back where The Boss and the Bad Ass are dressed as the foreign terrorists, Sadam Hussein and Osama Bin-Laden. Bad Ass is talking about Crusher...
Bad Ass: But my thought is this... If...When You change again; will you still have that edge? Will you still be the best there is when it comes to the trash talking? The victim beating? The rule breaking? Or will you be reduced to the villianous ranks of Da Playa, the Jigga Man, and Stryfe? Those guys are trying to be evil, but they're more like annoying ass clowns. Will you be doomed to follow them Crusher? I think so, but I guess we'll have to wait and see, won't we?
Matt hands off the microphone again and begins posing before the fans as they boo him. He taunts them still as The Boss starts up again.
The Boss: And still we're on top! It looks like ol' Smitty didn't have what it took to stay on top after all. And Royal was easily dealt with as told by myself and the Bad Ass. Now Crusher is left to find his "inner being" and take it my suicidal friend here. And you know what? That leaves me with an open slate and no one to fight. So let's get some fresh meat and why not have some challengers, eh? Let's "Keep It Real"...
The Boss laughs and pounds fists with the Bad Ass. But they're suddenly interupted by the music "You Know You Ghetto" as Da Playa and Stryfe start running for the ring, led by the Bad Ass' younger brother, the "Jigga Man" Al Covey! The Boss and the Bad Ass stand their ground, the Boss holding his title belt as a weapon. They stand before the ring and bide their time, shouting insults through the air. TheBoss suddenly turns and his eyes go wide as he ducks out under another side of the ring. Matt turns around and finds that Crusher has come from the crowd and slid into the ring with him. Crusher then clotheslines Matt over the top rope to which the Boss quickly grabs him. The two bail over the guardrail and into the crowd as Da Playa, Stryfe, and Jigga Man give chase. The scene fades.
Ryan Cole: There you have it folks. Hells Union has made the Corporation their first...
Matt stops and looks over at TJ smacking him across the arm.
Bad Ass: What did I tell you, TJ? They'll only show the bad, none of the good...
The Boss: I thought the clip was pretty good myself. Couldn't wait to see what happened and all. And that was a surprise watching Crusher take us out. I didn't see it coming!
Bad Ass: ...YOU F*CKING LIVED IT! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!
Kaly: That's what I keep asking him.
The Boss: Hey...shhhh you guys. I haven't actually seen this part yet.
The scene changes to Sean Jericho in a recent promo he did with certain...little people.
Sean: well hell I think that’s another victory for me. (Crowd screams) many of you might have noticed that not only have I got one hell of a headache but also I’m missing one tittle that’s because at Eve Of Destruction I got cheated out of my tittle because of Matt and Nick’s little conspiracy What? Yeah their little conspiracy. So let me just show those nobody’s who missed Eve O’ Destruct what actually happened go-on puppets role the footage.
A footage is shown with Sean Jericho getting ready to climb the ladder after hitting Nick with a Silent Stunner when all of a sudden Matt Covey comes down the ramp and knock’s over the ladder then he gets a chair and smashes it over Jericho’s head. Jericho goes down straight away and Nick climbs the ladder to get both the television and hardcore tittle.
Bad Ass: You see that sh*t? That's some good footage there. That's what we need to see more of, you just gotta get off your ass and get it done, TJ.
The footage ends and all the camera’s go back onto jericho.
Sean: Well what do you know. As King said I was cheated outta both my tittle and the television all for what, Nick Lopez’s dream well it seems that my little nocturnal buddy (Get it “Knight”) got one over on me and indeed I was screwed. So just to show that there’s no hard feeling I want to meet Nick Lopez in person in the ring right now. (Jericho waits for ten seconds) Oh Come on Nick I just wanna talk.
Then all of a sudden “Enter Sandman” by metalica starts to play and the crowd goes wild with some boo’s and some cheers. Then a midget dressed up like Nick Lopez runs down to the ring and puts up his fists to Jericho. And during the duration of the promo, midgets of the "Bad Ass" Matt Covey, "Jigga Man" Al Covey, Nick Lopez, and Jay Cee come running to the ring... All of them getting their asses kicked. The Boss is thoroughly enjoying the show when Matt suddenly stands up and throws the television set against the wall, kicking the sh*t out of the busted pieces. Suddenly Jay Cee, and Nick Lopez burst into the room and stare at the enraged Bad Ass.
Nick Lopez: Yeah, we know how you feel.
Jay Cee: But we've got good news! Those midgest have comere here today and are hanging around with that son-of-a bitch!
Bad Ass: Well, what the f*ck are we waiting for?
The three run out the door, leaving Hicks and Kaly alone.
The Boss: Come to daddy, baby.
She climbs up in his lap and knees him in the nuts. The scene fades...It then reopens five minutes later where Bad Ass, Lopez, and Jay Cee are searching individual locker rooms for their culprits. Bad Ass and Lopez are ramsacking the locker room of the J.O.B Squad, throwing sh*t everywhere. Bad Ass even goes so far as to turn Wild Thing's locker over on it's side. Suddenly, a scream comes from down the hall.
Jay Cee: I got me one! Whoo! I bagged a midget!
Bad Ass and Jay Cee quickly rush to join him in the hall where he appears to be holding up mini-Bad Ass or as he was called, "Sad Ass". Matt looks at the miniature reincarnation and smirks. He then abruptly pulls back and slams his fist into the little man, knocking him back into a wall and out of Jay's hands. He then grabs the unconscious short-sh*t and stuffs him in a locker, closing it on the helpless wannabe.
Jay Cee: Well, I thought about asking him about Jericho's where-abouts, but I guess that ideas gone down the sh*tter.
Nick Lopez: Hey! There goes more of them!
The three corporate members storm down the hall chasing after the miniature terrors until they corner them just outside a locker room that reads, "Sean Jericho". Nick Lopez takes the lead and rushes into the room looking for a fight. But Jericho is no where to be found. Lopez screams and slams his fist into a locker, denting it in.
Jay Cee: Damn. First we can't find Jericho, and now we're losing the dwarfs.
Bad Ass: What?
Matt turns to find the midgets escaping down the hall. The three men immediately give chase towards the arena exit door. To their right is another hallway behind a series of lockers, but they don't worry about that as the midgets shoot straight out the door. Jay Cee is the first one through followed by Nick Lopez. Bad Ass starts for the door, but a lead pipe suddenly catches his face! He falls hard to the floor and looks up to find Crusher shutting the door and locking out Lopez and Jay. They constantly beat from the other side, but they can't get in. Crusher than leans over the Bad Ass.
Crusher: So you've got the balls to let ol' Crusher whoop your ass again do ya? Well here's a little gift from me to you!
Crusher weilds back the pipe and slams it across Matt's right knee. He then flips him off and flees out the back door, hitting Lopez and Jay Cee with it. A black car with Allen Smith and Sean Jericho in it, suddenly whirs by and grabs Crusher, the three men driving off as Jay Cee and Nick Lopez tend to the screaming Bad Ass, his knee begining to swell...