Title: Being you

Rating: pg for mild language

Disclaimers: matt and Jeff own themselves and are owned by the wwf. 

“It’s not so bad being me you know!!!” Jeff exclaimed to his brother Matt as he lay on the bed in the physiotherapist’s room.

“It must be, look at you, you’re banged up and you’re the one laying there not me.”

“The crowd like what I do. They get bored with you and your twist of fate. You need to do more high flying stuff, more extreme things like me.” Jeff said as he winced from the pain in his ankle.

“Are you saying Matt Hardy isn’t extreme?”

“Your extreme but just not 2 extreme like me. If you get what I mean.”

“I get it.”

“Good then you know what I mean.”

“I think I do some thing that are, well, what you call ‘high flying’.”

“Like what!!??” Jeff said laughing as he pulled on his bright purple socks.

“I do moonsaults and stuff.”

“But anyone can do moonsaults, why don’t you try something new?”

“Like what?” Matt said as he put his hands on his hips.

“Like the Swanton,”

“You’re kidding right?”

“No, why not try it?”

“Because it’s your thing.”

“So, the Twist of Fate was yours but Amy does that.”

“That’s different.”

“No it isn’t, she nicked your move so you nick mine.”

“I don’t want to nick your move. I want one of my own.”
”Look, why don’t we go down to the pool and try out some stuff?”

“Ok.”

“But the first thing you have to do is the Swanton, it’s the easiest.”

“Fine. Whatever.” Matt said as he helped Jeff of the bed and helped him walk out of the room and down the stairs to Matt’s car.

“Matt, I would come and show you but my ankle is killing me.” Jeff whined to his brother who was standing on the bottom diving board.

“I feel stupid doing this.”

“Stop being a chicken and get on with it. It’s water, it won’t kill you.”

“It might.”

“Jesus Matt.” Jeff said as he got to his feet and hobbled over to his brother and got onto the low diving board. “Look, just stand there.” He said as he pushed Matt towards the edge of the board. “Show the crowd your guns.” He said lifting his arms out to the side.

“Jeff, I know this bit.”

“Shut up and do as I say. Now bend your knees and jump.”

“Jeff, this isn’t my sort of thing. I’m not like you, I can’t do this sort of stuff.”

“Look, just pretend you’re me.”

“Yeh right. I would have to go jump the volcano in your front garden or something.”

“Hey, be fair, I’m trying here ok?”

“Your very trying Jeff.”

“Look, just shut it ok? Lets try this, just try acting like me.”

“What do you mean?” Matt said as he followed Jeff of the diving board.

“I mean think like me, act like me. Actually, this is even better.”

“What?”

“BE ME!!!” Jeff said as he clapped his hands in excitement.

“Now you’ve gone mad.”

“I’m serious, you be me and I’ll be you.”

“Where do you get these ideas?”

“My natural intelligence.” Jeff smirked as he and Matt sat down on two sun beds. “It would be the perfect way for you to become a true high flyer.”

“What?? Me act like a total idiot and dye my hair all colours, become a fashion victim and wear heels? I don’t think so Jeff.”

“I do, it will be perfect. Come on, do it for your favourite brother.”

“You’re my only brother Jeff.”

“So you’ll do it?” Jeff asked as he moved over and sat beside Matt.

“I never said that.”

“But you will won’t you? PLEASSSSSEEE MATTY! You know you want to.”

“No.”

“OK, then I’ll make you.” Jeff said as he began to think what he could do.

“And how will you do that exactly?”

After Jeff sat there for a minute thinking. He suddenly sat up and began to sing. “I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves. I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves. I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves. I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves…”

As Jeff continued to sing Matt slapped his hand to his forehead and sighed. He knew Jeff would never shut up unless he did this. So reluctantly he turned to his brother who was still singing and was now being starred at by a few people around them. “JEFF!!” Matt shouted as Jeff turned to face him. But was still singing. “Ok. I’ll do it.”

“I knew you would!!!” Jeff said as he stopped singing and slapped his brother on the back. “You won’t regret it I promise.” He said grinning.

“Oh, I think I will.”

“Jeff. I’m not going out there looking like this.” Matt shouted at his brother who was busy painting his nails black. “I look like a freak.”

“Now Matty, this is all part of the deal. You said you would go out there and be me for the night. The crowd will love it.”

“I don’t think so Jeff. They will think I have had one to many knocks on the head.”

“No they won’t. Anyway, you’re the lucky one, I have to go out there and look like you!!”

“Yeh, dressing like a normal person must be really embarrassing for you Jeff.”

Jeff ignored that comment and stood up; admiring the handy work he had done on Matt’s nails.

The sixty-second nail polish dried and Matt stood up and looked in the full-length mirror. He frowned as he looked at his reflection.

His previously normal hair was now dyed five different colours. Red on the front left, bright green on the front right, blue on the back left, pink on the back right and purple in the middle of the top of his head. He looked down at the bright green shirt Jeff had given him to wear. The gloves up his arms that Jeff had got especially for the occasion. He wore his own black Jeans and boots. His gaze moved back up and looked at his hair as Jeff put a multi coloured bandana on his head. Matt let out a heavy sigh before turning to Jeff. “Well?”

“You look great. How about me?” Jeff asked as he stepped in front of the mirror.

“You look ok. But that shirt looks way better on me.” Matt replied commenting on the red and black-striped shirt he had given Jeff to wear. He had the short gloves on with black elbow pads. His hair was wet and hung down by his face. It had turned from its previous green and purple locks to black.

“I think not big brother.” He said doing a girly twirl in the mirror.

“I’m not going out there like this.”

“YOU ARE!!!!”

“No Jeff, this has gone far enough.”

“I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves. I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves. I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves. I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, I know a song that will get on your nerves, get get get on your nerves…”

“OK OK OK!!!!!!” Matt yelled as he slapped Jeff upside the head. “Lets go if we are gunna do this.”

“What in God’s name is that?” J.R said on the commentary as the Hardyz music rocked the arena. “That’s…that’s Matt Hardy!!!!”

“I think the other hardy boy has finally flipped.” Paul Heyman replied as he laughed at the two Hardyz making the way down the ramp.

“Matt Hardy has multi coloured hair!! I don’t believe it! Jeff has black hair and Matt has a rainbow on his head. What is going on here?”

“I’ll tell you what is going on.” Paul began. “The wrestler’s in the WWF are mentally insecure. And it has finally caught the Hardy Boyz. You see Matt has completely lost his sanity and Jeff has quiet obviously lost his bottles of hair dye. Now, in the alliance we would not tolerate such behaviour. We would strip those boys down and make them into fine alliance members.”

“What ever you say Paul.” J.R replied as he rolled his eyes.

Matt’s face burned up as he got into the ring. He felt as if all eyes where on him. He went to the corner and flashed his guns at the audience and jumped down and stood with Jeff. Jeff just stood there smiling as if it was completely normal. But for Matt, this was hell and it was about to get worse a Palumbo and O’Haire made their way to the ring.

Jeff had taken a beating in the middle of the ring and Matt waited for the tag. He finally got it and held onto the top rope and flipped over it into the ring. The crowd cheered as he did and he met O’Haire with a clothesline that sent him to the mat. He stomped on to O’Haire’s spine. He then ran to the ropes and gave the swinging neck breaker to him before going to a corner and climbing to the top rope. He looked at Jeff who still lay in the corner, holding his knee. He turned back to O’Haire who had begun to stir. He finally got to his feet but matt hit him with a flying drop kick and sent him back down. Palumbo then got into the ring and knocked Matt down he went for a sleeper hold but Matt countered with a Jeff like Twist of Fate, none of the fancy stuff, he just grabbed his neck and pulled him down to the mat. He climbed to the top rope and stood up. He flashed his guns at the crowd and hit the ‘xtreme bomb’ on Palumbo. The crowd went wild as Matt completed the 1 ½ backwards summersault with a pin and the three count.

The crowd went wild and the music played as Jeff got up and left the arena with Matt.

“That was awesome Matt, you should be me more often.” Jeff said as he held his hair over the edge of the hotel room bath. He was rinsing out the spray in hair colour. Matt sat on the counter watching him.

“I’d rather be me.”

“Why? The crowd loved you like that. Your way more extreme.”

“But it hurts like hell.”   

“Yeh, I know but you get used to it.” He said as he wrapped a towel girly style around his hair. “Come here. I’ll wash yours out.”

“Nah, that’s ok.”

“What?” Jeff asked, his left eyebrow raised.

“I think I’ll keep it a while.” He said as he looked into mirror. He adjusted the bandana and walked out of the bathroom.

“Matt. Don’t take offence to this but you hate having coloured hair, so why the hell do you want to keep it? Have you gone nuts?”

“Like you said Jeff, I should be you more often and this hair dyes a ten washes so I’ll try it for a while and see what I think.”

“You’re mad do you know that?”

“I’m you Jeff.” He said with a soft laugh a he fell backwards on to his bed.

  The end!!!

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