"A mild answer calms wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger."

As with many other passions, anger (or wrath) may be an emotion or an attitude. Read the Gospel: Jesus was angry. If Jesus got angry, it must be right, because he never sinned. So we can get angry?

Some say we can't control our emotions, but we "choose" our emotions from our "emotional toolbox." If anger is in our heart already, events will bring it out. Our reaction to events will reflect this: we may respond to offenses or accidents with humor, kindness and patience, because that is what is in our heart.

But if we still have anger in our heart, what do we do in the meantime? Once the anger wells up and starts to spill out, we have an ongoing decision: let it out or refuse to participate. This is not a matter of holding it in. It is a matter of starving it but refusing to feed it. Anger always dissipates eventually, so we can just let it happen sooner by not holding on to it and refusing to enjoy it.

"Whoever is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment"

People enjoy their anger. Think about it; you will find it is true. Even though we may feel terrible later, we enjoy the power of anger while we are giving ourselves to it. We get an adrenaline rush and forget all the bad things about ourselves.

Every angry person feels righteous. When we are angry we concentrate on the object of it and forget everything else.

Many times, our anger over situations is not due to the situations' actual morality, but is because they conflict with our own ideas about what is good. A good deal of self-examination is required: why am I really angry?