"Ichabod" sits watching the seemingly endless promotions on WOW 24/7 television. He has saved three of them, Justin Payne's, one of Wafer's, and the one Wicked D posted earlier that he missed. He hits rewind on the tape and goes back over Wafer's promotion.
Wafer pulls up to a Wendy's before he gets back on the freeway. He walks in and smiles at a cashier as he orders his food. After he's done he walks to a Pilot gas stationed that is an add-on to the Wendy's. He purchases a Snaple Rain and a pack of Newports before heading to his car. As he backs out of his parking place, he's nearly hit by an idiot driving a nasty, beat, up looking, red Ford LTD. The LTD breaks down behind him. Wafer (Sgt. Lawrence out of uniform) gets out to help the teenagers in the Ford LTD. As he closes his door he takes a look at the car. Both headlights are broken. The back seat window on the passenger side is gone. trash is all over the inside. The car is dirty and basically, needs to be scrapped and replaced. The teenagers get out of the car, one smoking the other not, and look under the hood. Smoke comes climbing out as the hood is opened. Wafer has to wave the smoke out of his face. Wafer offers his assistance to the teenager that was driving. He looks him over. Shaggy hair, a bad attempt to grow a goatee. Looks like the boy hasn't slept in days. The boy tries despratley to convince Wafer that he knows exactally what's wrong. The other teenager is crashed out in the font seat without a care in the world. After finally figuring out that the car will need to be towed, they go insde and order drinks. Wafer notices the driver is broke and the passenger gladly pays for the drink. They sit with Wafer and start small talking. They are both still in high school. One is older than the other. The driver seems constantly down about some incident with a boogy board and his ex-girlfriend. Wafer shakes his head as he starts to feel the Deja Vu. The passenger rolls his eyes as the driver bitches and moans about every detail the driver says. He can't do this now. He can't go here. He's going to lose this. Fianally the subject gets changed. They start talking abut thier plans after high school. The driver says he wants to go to college, but doesnt know if he's going to lose his scholarships because of what happened with the girl. The other has no clue and looks like he could care less.
The tow truck arrives and Wafer gives the boys a ride back to thier house. He drives off and can't help but to compare. Ichabod and Wafer. Wafer goes down the freeway. Ichabod is the only thing he can think about.
"Ichabod" raises an eyebrow at the screen, then stops the tape. He leans back and looks up then rolls his eyes. A small smirk plays across his face as he begins to speak.
Wafer, what the hell was that crap? Were you trying to show me that one of those guys reminded you of Ichabod? One of them remind you of yourself? Which one, Wafer? Ichabod went to college on a scholarship for wrestling with no problems. You went into the marines. Which one of those teenage losers was supposed to be one of us?
Wafer you are an idiot. I don't know exactly what that whole thrity minute pointless pass of time was supposed to mean to anything important, but I'm sure in your militarily deflicted mind, it made some kind of sense. You lean on your military like it is your ticket to get through every problem and challenge in life. You think that because you WERE a Marine, that that makes everything all better. Nothing makes everything all better,Wafer. Even what I'm doing isn't going to make my situation all better. But I know damn well its going to improve it. Better to go out as someone hated just to go out.
And all this shit about a funeral. Guess what, Wafer, I'm not dead. Many have tried to commit me to that eternity, but I stubbornly won't go. After I do finally give up and let go of life, I'm obviously not going to care about a flag and three idiots firing guns off over me while I'm trying to start my eternal sleep. And why the hell do I want that piece of trash banner of a nation of bullying, aggressive, hypocritical, antagonistic assholes who think they run God and everything he's created?
"Ichabod" thinks for a moment and then smiles sarcastically.
On second thought, maybe you are a great representative of this country. Great job protecting those ideals, jarhead.
"Ichabod" looks around his hotel room at the meager surroundings. He may have a body once again, but the "necessities" of living that so many enjoy just have no appeal to him. He doesn't eat or drink much, and he knows enough of his own functions now to never worry about illness again. The processes of healing from any injury are greatly accelerated, he is in the prime of life where he is.
"Ichabod" fast fowards the tape to Justin Payne's promo, and listens intently. He nods here and there as the man on the screen speaks about what he thinks. When the camera fades on Justin Payne, "Ichabod" pauses the tape once more. He leans back, resting his chin on his hand and his arm on his knee.
Well, Payne, it seems like you've finally got your head on straight. "Whether you go by Ichabod, JOHN JACOB JINGLE HEIMER SCHMIDT, or the artist formerly known as Ichabod, you are still scheduled to face me and Wafer in a three way dance. I look at you and Wafer as one thing, and one thing only.... opponants. Leave the past where it is, and let Malice write us all new beginings." Thats what it's all about, Payne, a new beginning. A place where people like me can be in main events, a place where people like Wafer have so much over their heads that the cocky words that constantly stream out of their mouths like Hershey Squirts are suffocated before they escape their throats, a place where people like you finally let go and step aside to make way, or where they at least are willing to count their wins and decide they've had plenty.
Payne, I'm not denying that you are a legend, that would be stupid of me. But when I talk of old guys, I'd like to compare you to Undertaker. You know what he does? He steps aside gracefully, respectfully, so that the newer fresher faces can start mixing it up with the old pros. Thats how people like me get better and better, by having the chances to get knocked around a little by the bigger names instead of just dancing week in and week out in this bullshit coreography that opens every show. And does anyone fault him for that?
No, you are no Undertaker, Payne. You are a Ric Flair and Hogan, maybe not in age, but in act. But every Flair meets his match, every Hogan meets his Lesnar. I'm that to you, Payne.
Both of you have a wake up call coming on Malice. I'm not what you expect, Payne seems to get that, but Wafer still can't get it through that thick skull of his. All the better for me to get that one up on him he thinks he has on me... You beat Ichabod, Wafer? When? I can only remember one important match the two of you had, two Waferbombs, that all powerful finisher, two Waferbombs through two flaming tables. And who won that match? That's right. Ichabod. But thats the past of course, I'm only pointing out the details that you seem to edit to your liking. Maybe after Monday you'll go around telling everyone you beat me. Won't they all have a laugh. Maybe you'll even go to Wal-Mart and get a WOW Official Brutality Belt made of plastic and rubber. What a.... dare I? Choad.
"Ichabod" laughs as he leans foward to play the tape through its last promo, that of Wicked D. He has a special reason for wanting to see this as he expected the painted fool to return around this time. For the life of him, "Ichabod" will never ever know why Serious Darius associated himself with that lunatic. Wicked D is a mere tool, the purpose belongs to people like "Ichabod." He'd proved that back in RDW when he'd first moved on the real Ichabod. As the promo plays, a look of worry comes over "Ichabod's" face. He sees Steve Parke in his hospital bed. He obviously survived the crash that "Ichabod" orchestrated a few days ago. "Ichabod" listens with growing rage as Wicked D and his own friend Serious Darius retell the story of SAM.
At the end of the interview, "Ichabod"--SAM really, stands up in a snarl of anger. He kicks the television so hard that it slams backward into the plaster wall. Static rips the screen as SAM tears out of the door of the hotel. He rushes through the parking lot as fire from somewhere bathes the entire area in a surreal reddish-orange glow. He puts his fist through the window of the first car he comes to, a blue '99 Pontiac Grand Am. The horn blares in alarm, but SAM has already unlocked the door and climbed inside. He hotwires the ride as the horn dies down, and speeds off in the direction of Spartanburg.
Back in the parking lot, the fire rages on. High on the roof of the hotel stands a ring of flags, burning brightly and dripping flaming melted bits of cloth onto the top of the building. Every other flag contains white stars on a blue field in the top left corner of a field of red and white stripes. The Star Spangled Banner. The rest of the flags have a red field, and emblazoned across the center of each one is a bald eagle of gold, a globe showing the western hemisphere, and an anchor with a rope wrapped around it. In the eagles' beaks are banners which read "Semper Fidelis."
|
