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02.05.02
Ichabod-The Evil Redneck

~Amnesty, absolution, rivalry, vengeance, respect. Fuck it, just leave me alone.~

The alarm at the local Blockbuster video sounds endlessly into the night. The squadcars slide into the parking lot and hurry into the store. A large employee is holding a customer by the arms.

Officer #1:What is going on here?

Employee: Caught this guy pilfiring videos in his bookbag. Saw the bulk and decided to check it out.

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The squadcar races toward downtown. The guilty customer is in the back, looking out the window in dissappointment. The officers decide to talk to him to pass the boring night. The passenger officer cuts the scanner down.

Officer #2: So what gave you the bright idea to take videos out of the store?

Customer: You wouldn't believe me, but I saw six other dudes walk out with videos they stole, and the alarm didn't go off. Figured I'd cash in big.

No alarm? Better call Blockbuster and let 'em know their alarm is broken.

Scanner: Unit 1700 please respond to attempted shoplifting at 357 and Wade Hampton.

Isn't that a Blockbuster video?

Yeah . . . hmmm.

The officers in the car turn on the siren after exchanging confused glances. The perp just laughs his ass off in the back seat.

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Half alcohol-induced laughter cuts through the night air over the Savannah Suites Hotel in Taylors, SC. Ichabod and Lopez stand on the roof, leaning on the wall and drinking beer and smoking cigarettes. There is a chill in the air from the impending winter storm that only the poison of alcohol could warm. The two friends continue laughing as they talk.

So how'd ya do it man?

Got this little machine from a friend in Spartanburg. It demagnetizes those little strips on stuff that makes the alarms go off. I just had Steve break into a few Blockbusters and run it over the front of the videos.

Exactly how many Blockbusters did he hit?

Hmm, how many Blockbusters are there from Cowpens to Anderson.

Holy shit dude! Let me guess, no point right?

Yeah, there was a point, I needed a good laugh.

So tell me about this wrestling thing your in? Who you plannin on fuckin up next?

Honestly Lopez, I don't care, I'm just gonna wait for that idiot Thomas to put me in a match, then I'm going to go out there and do what I do best, and that's embarass the hell out of the other guy, and slowly move up.

To the world title right?

Whatever...

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Deidre walks through the airport with only one bag of carry-on to her name. She wears big dark sunglasses and a shawl over her head. She's bundled up tight, not because of the weather, but hoping that no one is going to notice her. She has a tight schedule to keep, and she doesn't need fans going crazy for autographs and interviews.

Random Person: Look, Paul, its Deidre! Hey Deidre!

Shit!

Deidre breaks into a run. She gets to full speed, thankfully only knocking down three people on the way to the gate. She steps through the metal detector and hands the personnel her ticket, then boards the plane. As she sits she, pulls out her headphones and sets the seat back a little. Its going to be a long flight to Texas.