DD: I can't wait for this one, Vince! You saw last night on the Slam it exploded between those 2! That egotistical bastard Lightning has been trying to hold Big Foot in his shadow for years, and tonight the Champion will step out of his shadow once and for all!

VJ: Wait…what makes you think Lightning's been holding Big Foot in his shadow!

DD: It's obvious! He knows that Big Foot is better than him, he could beat his ass any day of the week. Bottom line: Lightning fears Big Foot, and we're gonna see why tonight when Big Foot powerbombs him through the ring! I can't wait!

VJ: You're trying to cause more trouble between the cousins. Well I think we should leave that to the special guest referee in that match, Ice Cube! We saw him try to take both Lightning and Big Foot out on FNS last night, what kinda referee will he be tonight?

DD: The best damn referee there ever was!

VJ: Well also tonight we've got that big battle for control as Firestorm, Triple H and Sniper go up against Panther, Chyna and Shawn Michaels! If Panther, Michaels and Chyna aren't successful tonight…they're gone. They're out of the NFWA for good!

DD: Yeah, and the NFWA will be a better place! I mean, Panther must realize it too! He chose a woman to be his tag team partner??? What an idiot, Vince!

VJ: Well I don't know about that, but Trish Stratus named Krazed the special guest ref for that one!!!! It's gonna be interesting to see if he calls it down the middle!

DD: Yeah, I know he's mad at Firestorm for what he did to him last night, but what about Krazed and Panther! Krazed stole Tina from Panther last year and a couple of months ago Panther broke Krazed and Tina up the night he was about to propose to her! He can't call it down the middle either way! He's gonna try and ruin the match!

VJ: We've also got that crazy ass title match between Scarlet KV and Rage, the co-TV Champions. They're gonna try and kill one another tonight, and that match has the Extremist as the special enforcer to make sure that this one doesn't get too out of hand. Folks, it's gonna be an unbelievable night…

Joey: Tonight…is gonna be a good night!

Squirrel: (In the background) Hey Joey!!!!

Joey: What the…oh sh*t!

DD: VINCE!!!!! What is his malfunction?????!

Squirrel: Open the door, damn it! I know he's in there! Where's the Man???! Where is he???!

Joey: Get the hell outta here! You're crazy!!!

Squirrel: (Bashes the roof of the car with the sledgehammer) I know he's in there! I'm gonna get his ass, I'm gonna get your ass! Nobody f*cks with Squirrel and lives!!!

DD: That idiot has lost his mind! Do something, Vince!!!!

VJ: Squirrel is battering that limo with that sledgehammer…look!!! Merlino is climbing out of the sun roof!!!!

DD: Get away, Joey!!!!!

VJ: Squirrel just swung that sledgehammer at Merlino and missed!!!! Joey Merlino is hightailing it out of there!!!!!!! Squirrel is out of his mind…OH!!!!! Squirrel just hit one of those thugs with that sledgehammer and now he's chasing Merlino into the arena!!!!!! Squirrel is after Joey Merlino!!!!!

DD: Look out Joey!!! He's coming!!!!!!!!!!

VJ: Souljah has just knocked the Candian Career Killer outside of the cage and now he's headed out after him!!!!! Havok is back to his feet…he walks right into a dropkick from Murder Souljah!!!!!! Souljah picks up Havok by the hair…he catches him up under the chin with a hard uppercut!!!! Havok is being taken to school in the early…uh oh!!!!

DD: I don't like this, Vince!

VJ: Souljah has Havok set up for…OH!!!!!!! Slingshot sends Havok facefirst into the Cell!!!!!!! Facefirst!!!!! Havok may have been opened up by the impact of that blow…watch Souljah now!!!!

DD: Referee, get this idiot back into the ring!!!!!

VJ: That's exactly what referee Dale Peterson is trying to do! Souljah has Havok by the hair and they're headed back in. Man! There's sure been a lot of animosity between these 2 newcomers as of late!

DD: Murder Souljah is just jealous of Havok!!!!!

VJ: Souljah just tossed Johnny Havok into the ring…and he's got that chair!!!

DD: Oh no! Look out, Johnny!!!! That chair has your name on it…LITERALLY!!!!!

VJ: Souljah is measuring Johnny Havok with that chair…here it comes…NO!!! He misses with the chairshot and catches a boot to the midsection…HAVOK IMPULSE…NO!!!!! Souljah grabs him by the hair and tosses him back into the ropes…HURACAN--NO!!!!! Havok caught him! Havok caught…OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DD: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! Welcome to SlamFest, Souljah!!!!!!!!!

VJ: HAVOK BOMB THROUGH THE TABLE!!!!!!!!!!!! Murder Souljah has received a Havok Bomb through a table for the 2^nd time!!!!!!!

DD: And did ya notice that he bounced his head off of that Cell, too?

VJ: My God he may have killed him!

DD: He knocked his hair off Vince! Look!

VJ: Stop it! Souljah…how in the hell is he getting back up?? He damn near got killed and havok has that chair! That same chair that has his name written on it! He's climbing to the top rope now!!!

DD: If Souljah wasn't killed by that last shot, he's gonna get killed now…here it comes…

VJ: OOOHHHHHHH GEEEZ!!!!! FLYING CHAIRSHOT!!!! Right to the head…it sounded like a cannon just went off!!!!!! Murder Souljah is down and he is busted wide open! And look at Havok!!!

DD: He's getting more WOOD, Vince! WOOOOD!

VJ: Johnny Havok just pulled out a table from underneath the ring…he's setting it up in the ring now! Murder Souljah is out of it on the floor…Havok is coming out to get him now!

DD: Ya know, I just figured out why they call him the Canadian Career Killer, cuz after this match Souljah is gonna be dead!

VJ: Havok has the much smaller Murder Souljah by the throat…he rams the back of his head into the ringpost!!!!!!! And again!!!!! He has him now…he slams him into the cage now…WHOA!!!!! Souljah is fighting back!

DD: That little idiot!

VJ: He just grabbed ahold of the Cell and kicked Havok right back into the steel stairs!!!! Havok…I think he's hurt…Souljah charges in…he catches a huge boot to the face!

DD: he's out for good! I know it!

VJ: What a way to kick off SlamFest! Johnny Havok…no the hell he isn't! He's gonna powerbomb him on the floor!!!!!!

DD: Heh! Well…nice knowing ya, Souljah!

VJ: Johnny Havok has Murder Souljah and here it comes…powerbomb on the---SON OF A BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!

DD: DID YOU SEE THAT VINCE??????!!!!!!!!

VJ: JOHNNY HAVOK JUST POWERBOMBED MURDER SOULJAH RIGHT THROUGH THE CELL DOOR!!!!!!! RIGHT THROUGH THE DOOR!!!!!!

DD: Tonight isn't this Souljah's lucky night!

VJ: Souljah is out of it in the aisle and look at Johnny Havok! He's got a sadistic smile on his face! Souljah is drenched in blood…oh no.

DD: We've got more WOOOD Vince!

VJ: Havok just picked up another table and now he's carrying it out of the Cell! He's setting it up in the aisle!!!!! Johnny Havok…he's trying to destroy…why's he going back into the Cell!!

DD: He's got another one, Vince!!!!

VJ: My God! Johnny Havok is taking another table out of the Cell…he's stacking it on top of the other one!!! Havok…he's going back to get another one!!!!! He's….he's insane!

DD: He's gonna knock this Souljah guy's brains out! That's what he's gonna do!!!!!!

VJ: He's stacking a 3^rd table now!!!! Johnny Havok…watch Murder Souljah!!!!!!! Souljah is back up and give this young man credit! After everything that's happened this man still has a lot of fight left in him!!!! Havok hammers him with a big overhand right…SOULJAH RETALIATES!!!!! Havok tries another right hand that's blocked…Souljah with another one! And another!!!! And another one has Havok reeling!!!!! Souljah with a sidekick catches Havok square on the jaw and sends him staggering back into the Cell!!!!!! Johnny Havok is in some trouble…

DD: He's got a ladder!!!

VJ: Havok is headed back at Souljah with a…DAAAAMN!!!!!!

DD: Oh my God!!!!!

VJ: Running ladder shot just knocked Souljah into orbit!!!!! He caught him right on the jaw and sent him flying back into the front row!!!

DD: Just give it up, Souljah! You can’t win! Oh…look at this Vince!!!!!!!

VJ: Havok just grabbed the chain that was used to lock the Cell and now he has it wrapped around the throat of Murder Souljah!!! Souljah…he has Havok by the hair…OH MY!!!!!!! He just dropped Johnny Havok throat first on the guardrail did Souljah!!!! Havok…Havok is hurt and watch Souljah…he climbs up on the guardrail and floors Havok with a huge flying clothesline!!!! Havok is down and now where's Souljah going?!

DD: He's scared, Vince! He's running!

VJ: I don't know about that! He's got some evil intentions as he climbs that 30 ft Cell!!! Johnny Havok is back up…Souljah is atop the Cell!!!! Havok…look at that look on his face! He's got a steel chair…look out!!!!! WHOA!!!!! He just missed Souljah's head with that chair!!!!! Havok has another one…he tosses it up and again he misses Souljah!!!!

DD: He's trying to take his--LOOK AT THAT VINCE!!!!!

VJ: My God!!!! Havok just grabbed that ladder and tossed it up at Murder Souljah!!!!! Both of these guys are insane!!!!! Havok is climbing the Cell to try and get at Murder Souljah!

DD: HA! Look at the fear on Souljah's face! You are so gonna get it!

VJ: You sure do seem to like this Johnny Havok! I thought you hated Canada!

DD: Well that's only cuz that slut of a momma of yours gave birth to 90% of the Canadian population! This guy is an exception so he's cool!

VJ: You son of a bitch! Havok is almost atop the Cell…Souljah has that ladder…OH!!!!!!! He just skateboarded that ladder into the fa…

DD: TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMBEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!

VJ: OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH GOOOOOOOOOOODDDDD!!!!!!

VJ: I have never seen anything like that in my life!!!! Murder Souljah just skateboarded the ladder into the face of Havok, sending him tumbling 30 feet through those 3 tables!!!!!! HAVOK IS DEAD!!!!!!!!

DD: No he's not! He's just taking a little cat nap! Get up, Johnny!!!!!!!

VJ: Souljah…now what???! He's setting that ladder up on the roof of the Cell…he's climbing it now!

DD: this little fool has a death wish!!!!

VJ: He may indeed! Souljah is climbing…that's a 15 ft ladder on top of a 30 ft Cell!!!! My God! He's climbed to the very top rung of that ladder…

DD: He's gonna jump, Vince!!!!

VJ: Oh my God…look out!!! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! SENTON BOMB OFF THE LADDER RIGHT INTO THE HEART OF JOHNNY HAVOK!!!!!!!!! That had to be at least a 45 ft jump and listen to this crowd!!!!!

DD: You pissants shut the hell up!!!! Vince, tell em to shut the hell up!!!

VJ: NO!

DD: Ahhh…you're just mad cuz you're momma's a slut!

VJ: I'm gonna ignore that. Both Havok and Souljah are down in the aisle…we've got EMTs and officials out here to look after both men…geez Louise! This match may have to be stopped!

DD: They're both dead, Vince! I feel so sorry for Johnny's mother! Not that little jackoff Souljah, though! He can go screw himself!

VJ: You're…nevermind. Souljah is moving somehow. What a pay-per-view debut for these men! What an opening contest for SlamFest!!!!! Souljah is picking up Johnny Havok and dragging him back into the Cell!!!!!! How are either of these men walking?!

DD: Well Johnny's not really walking voluntarily!

VJ: Both men are back in the Cell…Souljah just brought another ladder into the ring…he's setting it up in the corner!

DD: this guy won't rest until both he and havok never wrestle again!

VJ: Souljah back out to the floor and he has Johnny Havok…he tosses him back into the ring. Souljah's whole body has to be aching! He tosses Havok into the ring…

DD: Pin him, you jackass!

VJ: Oh no! Souljah just pulled that table that Havok brought into the ring earlier into place! Souljah…he's climbing that ladder now!!!!! What is Murder Souljah doing…Havok is back to his feet…OH!!!!!!! He just tossed that chair right at the head of Souljah! He caught him right in the face!!!!!!

DD: He knocked him out, Vince!

VJ: Souljah fell back onto the top rope…and look at Havok! He climbs up to the ropes with Souljah…SUPERPLEX THROUGH THE TABLE!!!!!!!!! Souljah is down!!!!!!!!!! Havok…he's pulling hiself back to his feet…he looks like he's ready to end this! He has Souljah by the hair…

DD: Nice try, bitch!

VJ: OH!!!!!! Havok Impulse onto that steel chair!!!!!! This one…is over! He hooks the leg…1…2…3!!!!!

DD: Wow! Who would've thought we'd open up with one like that!

VJ: TLC/Hell in a Cell…it is the PPV debut for these 2 men and what a match it was!!!!!! We won't forget this one anytime soon! Congrats to Johnny Havok and give credit to Murder Souljah! He went down fighting in this one! Let's take you backstage to Kevin Taylor! Kevin…

KT: Thanks Vince. What an unbelievable match that was to start off SlamFest, and I can tell ya that this crowd is jacked here tonight! Hey…I wanna ask you people, who do you think is gonna win tonight when Rage takes on Scarlet KV???? (Fans begin shouting a mixture of "Rage" and "Scarlet") They're split down the middle! What about the Toughman Title! Who's gonna be the new Toughman Champ?? (Fans yell "Rodney" loudly, a few say "Blade") We have a lot of Demp fans! What about the battle for control??? Will Chyna be enough to help the team of Panther and Shawn Michaels get the win?! Will Panther be back in control after tonight??? (Crowd says "Yeah". Slight "Panther" chants in the background) And what about the Main Event?! Lightning and Big Foot…

KT: Wait a minute…what the…

Kenney: (Shoves Taylor down the stairs as the crowd cheers) Ya know what, I don't care about Big Foot and Lightning, I don't care about Panther and Chyna and all of that other BS over the ownership. All I know is that this is SlamFest, this is supposed to be the biggest PPV of the year! Well if it is, why the hell am I not on the card??? (Crowd boos) It's ok. Cuz I'm here right now to make a challenge! If any of you punks in the back have the balls, I have an open contract right here!!! (Pulls out the contract) Yeah! And what I'm gonna do is put this contract on the wall in the back, and anybody man enough I want you to sign it, and come down to the ring and face me tonight at SlamFest!!!!!! I'll be waiting! (Tosses the mic at Taylor's head and walks away as the crowd cheers)

DD: Can you believe that, Vince?!

VJ: Get some help for Kevin Taylor! He looks hurt! Anarchy has an open contract for tonight! Will anybody accept the challenge???

Rage: (Sighs) Damn it! Where the hell is he?

DD: What the hell is that idiot doing, Vince???!

VJ: Awww….c'mon!!!!! This is disgusting! It's Fredo, Angel and Maria!!!!! Jovan is there too!!!!! The 9^th Street Posse is attacking the Women's Champ in the aisle!!!

DD: Serves her right! Did you hear what Diamond said about Angel's mother last night? Terrible! Simply terrible!

VJ: She didn't…Maria is strangling the life out of Stephanie…look at Triple H and Rebecca in the ring! They're laughing! This was a setup!! It had to be!!!!

DD: Nah! It's just the kind of random violence you'd expect when you come to an 2 bit pisshole like New Jersey!

VJ: Angel has Billy…ANGEL DUST!!!!!

DD: Where!!

VJ: On the concrete! Angel Dust on Billy Gunn!!!! Billy Gunn is down!!!! Stephanie's face is turning blue!!!!! Diamond just caught Maria with a right hand and knocks her off of Stephanie! Atta girl Diamond! Oh no! Fredo has Diamond…ONLEY HIGH SLAM!!!!!!!!! Onley High Slam on the concrete…The Women's Champion has been destroyed! Billy Gunn has been destroyed! Stephanie McMahon has been destroyed!

DD: HA! I bet her new boyfriend Panther isn't happy about that!

VJ: New boyfriend? No Dave, that was just…forget it. The Posse is walking away and look at the smiles on their faces! Look at that smile on the Game's face--what the hell is he doing?!

DD: He's gonna put that slut Diamond out for good! Just like he's gonna do to Panther and Michaels later on!

VJ: Triple H has Diamond by the hair…he tosses her into the ring to Rebecca! Diamond is out like a light…

VJ: Oh no!

DD: Ooooooh yeah, Vince! We've got a new Women's Champion!!!!

VJ: Rebecca…this isn't right! 1 foot across the chest of Diamond…1…2…Diamond got her foot on the bottom rope!!! She got her foot on the rope!!!

DD: That is so cheap!!! Just like a slut!

VJ: Will you stop it??! Rebecca…she's pissed! He's strangling Diamond on the ground…and she's ramming the back of her head against the mat!!!!! Rebecca…she's snapped!

DD: Yeah, and I hope she snaps that bitch Diamond's neck!

VJ: Rebecca drags Diamond out to the center of the ring now…there's another cover! Diamond doesn't have the power to kickout! 1…2…DAMN IT!!!! She kicked out!!!! How did she do it!!!!

DD: She had the tights!!!

VJ: She…shut up! Rebecca is irate!! She's arguing with Stephanie Jenkins about the count…

DD: Look out! She's getting back up!!!!

VJ: Diamond is getting back to her feet…OH NO!!!! Rebecca with a hard dropkick to the face of Diamond!!!!!!!! Diamond is down…where's Rebecca going?!

DD: To the top, Vince!

VJ: Rebecca is climbing on the top rope…OH!!!! SHE FELL!!!!!

DD: YOU CLUMSY BITCH…I mean get up Rebecca!!!!

VJ: Rebecca is not a trained pro wrestler and she just took a helluva fall from the top! And this is the chance that Diamond needs! Both women trying to get back to their feet…here comes Rebecca…OH!!!!! Diamond with a spinebuster!!!!! Diamond just drilled Rebecca and she's going crazy!!! Diamond is right after right after right after right to the face of Rebecca!!

DD: Damn it! Do something about this Vince!

VJ: Triple H…he's up on the apron! Get down from there…WHOA!!!! Diamond just slingshot the Game into the ring!

DD: Beat her ass Hunter…NO!!!!!

VJ: Hunter missed with a right hand and Diamond got herself a handful of…testicles!

DD: You disgust me!!!!!

VJ: The Game is in pain!!!!! Diamond lifts him up into the air! What unbelievable strength!!! Rebecca is back to her feet…OH!!!!!!!! She tossed him right into Rebecca!!!! Rebecca and Hunter are down…Diamond with the cover on Rebecca…1…2…oh! Rebecca somehow got her foot on the rope!!!!!

DD: It's a miracle!!! What courage by the lovely Rebecca!!! That damn Diamond…she has got to be disqualfied! That was illegal use of a foreign object!!!!

VJ: Foreign object…she threw Triple H at him!! He's a human being!

DD: Yeah, well his nose hit Rebecca in the face, and since part of his nose is in Canada right now it counts as a foreign object! DQ the bitch!

VJ: You suck! Diamond has Rebecca back up…Irish whip sends her into the buckle! Here comes the Diamond Elbow…OH NO!!!! Rebecca just pulled the ref into the way!!!!!! Referee Jenkins is down…Diamond has Rebecca…DIAMOND DROP!!!!!!!

DD: NOOOOO!!

VJ: This one is over!!! Jenkins is still down!!!! Referee…Triple H is in the ring!!! Look out Diamond…PEDIGREE ON DIAMOND!!!!!!! What a no good, lousy son of a bitch!!!!

DD: You momma! LOOK OUT!!!

VJ: OH! Billy Gunn with a spear on the Game!!!! Billy Gunn is hammering away with hard right hands to the head of Triple H! He picks him up by the hair…THE ONE AND ONLY!!!! Triple H is out!!! OH!!!!!

DD: HAHA! Now that's the way ya do it!

VJ: Rebecca from behind! Low blow on Billy Gunn sends him tumbling to the floor.

DD: She is without a shadow of a doubt the toughest woman there ever was…uh oh! Look out Rebecca!

VJ: Stephanie is in the ring! Stephanie…SPEAR!!!!!!! Stephanie McMahon is all over Rebecca!!!!!!!! Stephanie has lost it!!!!!

VJ: We've got a cat fight in the ring…here come security in the ring trying to get Stephanie out of there…Rebecca with a spear on Steph! My God this one is out of control!!!!!!

DD: Vince…this is the best catfight I've ever seen! I can see a bra strap!!!!!! HAHA!

VJ: Security is dragging Stephanie out of the ring…he shirt has been ripped…DAVE PUT THAT CAMERA DOWN!!!!!! Stephanie is being dragged back to the locker room…she's a wildcat!

DD: Man…what does she see in Panther?!

VJ: Dave…idiot. Wait…Stephanie lost her boot in that fight and now Rebecca has it…Diamond is back up…BOOT TO THE FACE!!!!!!! Rebecca just KO'D Diamond with that spiked boot!

DD: I didn't see that! Clean off your glasses!

VJ: Rebecca with the cover on Diamond! She's gonna steal this one…look in the aisle! It's Shawn Michaels!!!!

DD: What is that Texas hick doing out here???!

VJ: Shawn Michaels is on his way to the ring…and Rebecca just spotted him!!!! Rebecca…we've got some heated words between Mr. and Mrs. Michaels!!!!!

DD: Rebecca, forget about that idiot! You have the Women's Title won!!!

VJ: Michaels has a water bottle…OHHHHH!!!! He just spit that water into the eyes of his wife!!!! Diamond is back up…DIAMOND DROP!!!! DIAMOND DROP!!!! There's the cover!!!!

DD: Hunter!!!!!!!!

VJ: 1…2…3!!!!!!!!!!

DD: Damn it!!!!!!

DD: No!!! That damn Michaels!!! Damn STUPID Michaels!!!!! Damn him!!!!!

VJ: Despite interference from the Posse, despite a Pedigree from Triple H, despite a boot to the face by Rebecca, Diamond is still the NFWA Women's Champ!!! What about it, Dave???!

DD: What about it??? She cheated!!! This isn't over Diamond! Rebecca is gonna get you, and if she can't I'll get you…and your little dog too!!!!!

VJ: (Looks at Dave like he's a fool)

DD: What?

VJ: Anyway…up next…

VJ: Wait a minute!!!!! It's Tina!!!

DD: What the hell is wrong with these bitches tonight?!

VJ: Tina just knocked Merlino out of his boots with that clothesline…she's gone nuts on Joey Merlino!!! Oh no! Merlino just turned the tide on Tina!

DD: Yeah! Show that skank what for…HA!!!

VJ: OH NO! Merlino just slapped Tina right in the face!! And again!!!! Tina has been busted…IT'S CHYNA!!!!

DD: Run Joey! Run!!!

Joey: (Laughing) Who the f*ck do you think you are? Do you know who the hell you're dealin with?

Panther: (Slaps Joey in the mouth, drawing blood) Yeah, you're damn right I know who I'm dealing with, but obviously you don't know who the hell you're f*ckin with! You and "the Man" right? You think you're big shots, think you can come up into the NFWA and start sh*t with P-Diddy and get away with it. Is that right?!

Joey: (Breathing heavily) I'll kill you!

Panther: HAHAHAHA! Ya hear that Chyna! "I'll kill you!!!!" You…damn you're a funny dude! (Slaps him across the face again) But I'm not in the mood for jokes! Look, as far as I'm concerned Merlino, you're sh*t! You're the dirt on the bottom of my boot! I've got more important things to worry about than you, but I'll tell ya what! You wanna start trouble with me? "The Man" wants to start trouble with me? Well you find his bitch ass and you tell him to watch that 6 man tag later on, cuz after I beat Firestorm's ass, after I beat Sniper's ass, after I beat Hunter's ass, tell him to come on down to the ring and get some of P-Diddy, cuz there's enough ass whoopins to go around! (Pinches his cheek) K pally?!

Joey: You're dead pal!!!!

Panther: Chyna, Tina…let's go!

Chyna: If you EVER put your hands on my sis again, you're gonna get 10 times worse than that!

Tina: Yeah! (kicks Joey in the ribs and walks away)

DD: Oh my God! Vince…that's Joey Merlino they did that to!!!! One of the most powerful men in Philadelphia!!

VJ: I've got a gut feeling that something crazy is gonna go down tonight!

Rage: Where the hell were you, man?

Ice Cube: My plane was late.

Rage: Well we have a tag team title match in a little bit! You've gotta ref the main event!

Ice Cube: Didn't I say my f*cking plane was late????! I wouldn't turn my back on my partner like that. I'm not you!

Rage: What the hell is that supposed to mean???! Forget it, let's just get ready for the match!

Rage: Hey Ice Cube!

Ice Cube: (with his back turned) What?

Rage: FIRE!!!!!!!!

Ice Cube: WHAT????!

Ice Cube: What the…Rage!!! Speak to me buddy!!!! What happened??! Damn you Extremist!!!! DAMN YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Grabs Rage and hugs him…appears to be laughing)

DD: You know they're breaking up tonight, don't you?

VJ: Yup. It's just a matter of who turns on who first!

DD: Yeah…when pigs fly! HAHAHA!!! LOOk!

VJ: Wait a minute!! It's that masked man again! That same masked man who attacked Rodney last week on FNS!!!!! He just hit him in the back of the head with that club!!!!

DD: HAHAHAHA! Who is that masked man, Vince?

VJ: I don't know…he's trying to destroy Rodney! We've got officials back there to try and get this lunatic out of there!

DD: You have the nerve to call him a lunatic? What about that idiot Demp?!

VJ: Rodney is hurt…look in the ring! Freak just pulled out a shovel from underneath the ring!

DD: Look out Insane!!!

VJ: Freak is stalking Insane with that shovel…BOOOM!!! Right in the face!

VJ: This battle is underway!! To win this match you must put KO both of your opponents…

DD: I think Insane may be out before the match even starts! And get a ref back there to count that bastard Demp out, cuz he's gone! Gone!

VJ: The ref is counting down Insane…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…te…NO!!!! He's up!!! Insane is moving! Freak can't believe it!

DD: I can't believe it either! It looked like he knocked his eyes out of the socket he hit him so hard!

VJ: Freak…he just rolled out to the floor and he's looking under the ring for more weapons! Uh oh!!!

DD: More WOOOOD!!! And STEEEEEEL!!!! And…what the hell is that???!

VJ: Freak just tossed a buoy into the…why the hell was that under the ring?!

DD: How much crap is under there?!

VJ: Freak is in the ring with…a buoy…he's waiting for Insane to get back to his feet…OH!!!!! Drop toe hold be Insane sends Freak crashing facefirst onto that steel chair!!!! The big man looks hurt after that one…look at that smile on Insane's face. He just grabbed that chair…

DD: Are you ready for some STEEEEEEEEEEEEEL????!

VJ: Insane…OH!!!! He just tatooed him with that chairshot!!!! That could be all for Freak and…look Dave!!! It's Rodney!!!!! Rodney is on his way out to the ring!

DD: Rodney…HA! That bitch! Look at him crawling on his knees!!!!

VJ: Rodney will do anything to get that Toughman belt! He's on his way out to the ring…Insane is laughing! Insane is laughing at Rodney! He's still out of it after the attack by that masked man in the back…WATCH FREAK!!!!!

DD: Look out Insane!!!

VJ: FREAK WITH A BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX!!!! Insane's head bounced right off of that table!!!!! Man!!!!! Freak has that chair now…OH!!!!!! He just knocked Rodney right off the apron with that shot!!!!! Rodney may be done!!!!! Insane is back up…OH!!!!!!!!! He catches one of his own!! Both Rodney Demp and Insane have been put down with chairshots and the ref is counting down…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8..Rodney's moving on 8!!!! Rodney is still in this one! 9 count…Insane just beats the count!! Freak can't believe it!!!

DD: C'mon you big idiot! Put Demp out now!!!

VJ: Freak just grabbed Insane by the hair…uh oh! What's he gonna do right here???! He just positioned that chair…OH!!!!! Running bulldog right into the seat of that chair by Freak!!! Freak looks like he's…what is he doing???!

DD: He's putting that chair onto Insane's head!!!!

VJ: He's gonna try and break Insane's neck!!!! C'mon!!! Winning the title is one this, but this is going too far!!!!!

DD: I love this Vince! I always knew there was something I liked about this Freak character!

VJ: Freak just wrapped that chair around the neck and head of Insane and now he's headed to the top rope!!!!! Freak is headed to the top rope…

DD: HAHA! Insane…bye bye!!!! What the???!

VJ: Demp is in the --OH GOD WHAT A SHOT!!!!!!!!!! SINGAPORE CANE RIGHT TO THE HEAD OF FREAK!!!!! Freak just dropped like a ton of bricks and look at Rodney go!!! Rodney…he's beating the hell out of Freak with that Singapore cane!!! The man has snapped!!!

DD: Call the white coats and get this idiot out of here!!!!

VJ: Insane is getting back to his feet…Rodney off the rope--OOOOOOH!!!!! HE JUST BROKE THE CANE OVER HIS HEAD!!!!!!

DD: He killed him, Vince!

VJ: Rodney has just laid out his oppenents…damn it he's back! That masked man is back…FROZEN LAMB LEG TO THE HEAD OF RODNEY!!!!!!!!!! Damn it…who the hell is that guy????!

DD: I don't know…Ice Cube's the only guy I know who uses a lamb leg.

VJ: This bastard is beating Demp in the head with that frozen lamb leg…this isn't right damn it! Somebody get him out of there! We've got security out here…that man finally hops to the floor! Who the hell is that?!

DD: I bet it's that jackass Lightning!

VJ: It is not! Thank God they're able to remove this man…IT'S KILLA!!!!

DD: Get away!!!!!

VJ: Killa just came to ringside with a chair…the masked man is running!!!! He's running!!!!!

DD: Killa has no business out here Vince! Get him back to the locker room.

VJ: The masked man just leaped through the crowd and Killa is hot on his trail! We're left with 3 men lying unconscious in the ring…oh!

DD: Insane's not unconscious!

VJ: this isn't right…c'mon! Insane has Rodney by the hair…he's getting ready to plant Demp with Total Insanity…

DD: Put the Children to bed…and while you're at it take that skankhole Rodney with em…uh oh!

VJ: Freak is back up!

DD: Turn around, Insane!!!!

VJ: Insane…TOTAL INSANITY ON RODNEY!!!! Rodney is out…Insane…just walked into the huge right hand of Freak!!!

DD: Nooo!!! Fight it! Fight it…Yes!!!!

VJ: Low blow by Insane!!! He picks that chair up off the canvas…OH!!!!! Freak booted it right back into his face…wait a minute! Look…THE LAST ACT!!!!!!!!!!

DD: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Get up!!!! Get up!!!!!

VJ: Insane is down…Freak just told the ref to put the count down…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10!!!!!!!!!

DD: AHHHHHH!!!!!

DD: This is highway robbery!!!! Insane was up! He was moving! I saw him!

VJ: He wasn't moving! He was out thanks to the Last Act!

DD: No…I he was just resting! Restart the match, Insane was robbed!

VJ: And now Freak turns to Rodney! Rodney is trying to pull himself back to his feet…Freak does it for him! Irish whip sends Demp into the ropes…POWERSLAM!!!!!

DD: Damn!! Did you see his back?!

VJ: Demp's back…he just banged it off of that metal buoy! Demp is writhing in pain on the mat…uh oh!

DD: Nothing a little wood won't cure! HAHAHAHA!

VJ: Freak is setting up that table!!!! Freak is getting ready to go on to face Blade in the finals!

DD: Here we go, Vince!

VJ: Freak has Rodney set up…here it comes..Powerb--Demp countered…OH MY!!!!!!! SPINEBUSTER THROUGH THE TABLE!!!!!

DD: Damn it! You idiot! Get the hell up!!!!!

VJ: Rodney just drove the back of Freak's head through that table! What unbelievable strength! The ref is putting the count down…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10!!! This one is o…

DD: NO NO! Shut your fool mouth, hussy! He's moving!

VJ: Incredible!!! How in the hell…Freak is still in this one!! Rodney can't believe it!

DD: HAHAHA! Look at the sweat running down his face, Vince! He's scared to death! You're gonna die, Demp!

VJ: Freak is getting back up…OH! Low blow to Rodney sends him down to his knees! Freak has turned the tide…he has Rodney by the hair…here comes a suplex…Rodney with a go behind! He shoves Freak into the ropes…boot…FLOWING DDT!!!!!!!

DD: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN IIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!!!!

VJ: He just dropped Freak right on his head! It's over!!!! The ref is putting the count down…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10!!!!!!!!

DD: You idiots!!!!!! You could've had him!!!!!

VJ: Rodney…despite the attack from that unknown man somehow moves on to the finals! It'll be Demp and Blade for the title tonight!

DD: How in the hell…Vince! They had the win in their hands! They had Rodney…damn it!!!!! You may have won this round Rodney, but next time…ahh!!!! I needs me a smoke!

VJ: Calm down! Tonight we will crown a brand new Toughman Champion! Up next, Blade and Slammer will team up to face the Natural Disasters. If Blade and Slammer can win, they get 5 minutes alone with Jim Cornette.

DD: Who the hell made that stipulation?! You remember what those 2 idiots did to Jimmy last time! They'll try and kill him!

VJ: Well I hope that isn’t the case here tonight.

DD: Oh no! Why is that skankhole still here?!

VJ: Squirrel…he is still on a mission to find Joey Merlino and whoever "The Man" is!

VJ: Wait a minute!!! Look at the sign on that door!

Squirrel: (Laughs) Big mistake! (Bashes the door with the sledgehammer)

DD: AAAH! Somebody's gotta do something about him!!!!!

VJ: Squirrel is going nuts on that door with the sledgehammer!!! Squirrel is bashing the door in…IT FELL!!!!!!

DD: Look out Joey!!!!

VJ: OH!!! What was that one the wall???! What did that note say?!

DD: Damn the note! This bastard Squirrel is gonna kill somebody tonight!

VJ: Whoever "The Man" is, he is a marked man here tonight!

DD: Yeah! Cornette picked the baddest tag team he could find to defend his honor against these hooligans Blade and Slammer, and tonight they're gonna get the job done.

VJ: There's the bell and this matchup is underway! Blade is up on the top rope…he's pointing at Cornette!!!!!

DD: Didn't you're momma ever teach your it's not polite to point! Geez, Vince! This guy…

VJ: OH!!! Glacier from behind is hammering away top the back of Blade!! Blade…oh no!! he just landed chest first on the barbwire!!!! That's not good considering he has a Toughman Title match later on…OH! There's Iceberg now! The Natural Disasters…they're doing a number on…OH!!!!!! Look at Slammer!!!!!!!

DD: Get up guys!!!!

VJ: Slammer with a tremendous double clothesline just floored both men!!!! Slammer has the big man Glacier backed into the buckle…right hand to the head! There's another! And another!!!! Slammer is hammering away upon the 600-lb. Iceberg…he's stomping away now…Iceberg is down!!!!! Iceberg is down!!!!

DD: Damn it! Don't let Jimmy down!!!!!!

VJ: Blade has Glacier back in the opposite buckle now…

DD: WHOOOOO!

VJ: Hard knife edge! And another one!!! Blade is motioning to the huge Slammer now…Irish whip…

DD: Look out Glacier!!!!!!!! OH!!!!!!!!

VJ: OHHHH! All 600-lbs. of Iceberg crashing right into the chest of Glacier!!!!!! He may have crushed his chest cavity…what's this!!!!

DD: There's no way they can do this! No way!

VJ: We're about to see what looks like a double belly to back su…OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

DD: (Crying) AHHHH! Vince…how can they…oh my God..his babies Vince! His babies!

VJ: Double atomic drop on the barbwire for Iceberg!!!! The big man…OH MY GOD THE ROPES JUST SNAPPED!!!!!! I have never seen anything like that in my life!!!!

DD: I think Jimmy's having a heart attack on the outside!

VJ: Blade and Slammer are taking it to the Natural Disasters, and there's nothing the Legion of Destruction can do because of the Cell…and they're going to get some toys!!!!

DD: What kinda toys?!

VJ: Not the kind you like…freak! Slammer and Blade are looking under the ring…we've got weapons!!!!

DD: Did you just insu…

VJ: Slammer is back in the ring and he's hammering away to the head…OH!!!!!!!

DD: Did you see that????! He knocked his neck off!!!

VJ: Glacier with a dropkick just knocked a cookie sheet right into the face of Blade! The back of his head just bounced off of the Cell and there's another shot! Glacier…

DD: He straight up molly-wopped Blade with that shot!

VJ: He did what?! OH!!!!! Stiff kick right to the nose by Glacier…he just wrapped the barbwire around the throat of Blade! This is uncalled for!!!!

DD: This is great!

VJ: Back in the ring, Iceberg isn't faring as well as his partner…he may never fare well again! Slammer has him by the head…Irish whip sends him crashing hard off of the buckle!!! Iceberg is in trouble…Slammer has a bottle!

DD: See Vince! This guys nothing but a drunk! OH!!!!!!!

VJ: He just shattered that bottle over the head of Iceberg!!!

DD: Disqualify him!!!!!!! That was soooooo illegal!

VJ: He just sliced Iceberg open and we have a cover…1…2…kickout! Over by the Cell door…that thing still hasn’t been repaired from earlier, Cornette is talking smack to Blade! If he's not careful Blade will…OH GOD!!!!!! Glacier just slammed the steel stairs into the back of Blade!!!!! That's not right! Cornette…c'mon ref! Get him away from there!!!!!!

DD: The LOD can do whatever they damn well please!

VJ: Cornette just handed Glacier a tennis racket…Slammer has Iceberg by the throat in the ring…SLAMDOWN!!!!!! Slammer just nailed the Slamdown and it looks like we're fixing to see the end!

DD: Glacier…help your buddy!

VJ: Slammer..he's trying to get the huge Iceberg up for the Last Slam…uh oh! He can't life Iceberg! He's too heavy!

DD: AWWWW! Too bad! Look at this…

VJ: Glacier!!!!!!!! Glacier just nailed Slammer right in the head with that sledgehammer!!!!

DD: That's a tennis racket, nutbrain! Have you Yankee ass Canadian bastards ever heard of a dictionary?!

VJ: Why I oughta… cover by Glacier on Slammer…1…2…kickout!!!!! Slammer kicked out!!!!!!!

DD: Damn it! Hit him again!!!!! Knock his damn brains in!

VJ: Iceberg…he's moving gingerly…he picks Slammer back up and he's holding him for something…THERE'S THE MELT DOWN!!!!!!

DD: Ring the bell! This one's over!

VJ: Cover by Glacier…1…2…SLAMMER KICKED OUT AGAIN!!!!!!

DD: Damn it! I DEMAND A STEROID TEST!!!! This guy is hopped up on something! I know it!

VJ: Slammer can't be put down! The Natural Disasters have to be wondering what you have to do to beat Slammer…

DD: I bet if pull out my 9 and bust a cap in that fool's ass he won't be getting…what the hell?!

VJ: Iceberg is climbing what's left of the ropes!

DD: How's he walking?!

VJ: He's not walking he's climbing, idiot! Don't you bastards in Delaware have dictionaries? Or maybe you're just too busy molesting little boys to read one! Jerk!

DD: (Wipes a tear from his eye) Damn Vince…I was just playing with ya man. You took it too far.

VJ: Yeah…that was pretty mean. Iceberg…he just climbed to the top turnbuckle…what in the world?! Dave…can you believe what we're seeing?!

DD: (Sniffles)

VJ: Dave?! Dave?! F*ck you! Glacier just tossed Iceberg a chair…he's over 600…OH MY GOD!!!!!!! ATOMIC ARABIAN FACEBUSTER TO SLAMMER!!!!!! His face has to be crushed!!! My God…he dented the ring!!!!!!! He dented the ring!!!!! There's the cover…1…2…OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

DD: NOOOO!!!!!!!

VJ: Blade…he just pulled out a flamethrower from underneath the ring…he's shooting it at the Natural Disasters…listen to this crowd!!!

DD: These sick ass bastards are cheering this!!! Blade is Psychotic!!!!!

VJ: He just grabbed a piece of that barbwire…OHHH!!!!! He wrapped it around the throat of Iceberg!!!

DD: He's trying to kill him!!

VJ: This is brutal!!!! Blade is trying to choke out Iceberg…watch Glacier…

DD: Get that little…NO!!!!

VJ: OH!!! Glacier went for the meltdown but he hit the wrong man!!!!! Iceberg has just been KO'D…boot to the stomach of Glacier by Blade…WOOD CUTTER!!!!!!! Into the barbwire!!!!! Glacier is done…1…2…3!!!!!

DD: NOOOO!!!!!

VJ: The Disasters have gone down!!!! Blade now gets 5 minutes alone with Cornette!!

DD: Nah nah! This isn't right! You cannot bring a

VJ: Look at that look of fear on Cornette's face! He makes me sick!

DD: Vince, you're so damn rude! The man is about to die and you're making fu… NO!!!!!!!

VJ: Oh!!! Blade just nailed Cornette with a clothesline!

DD: You little idiot! Get outta here, Jimmy!!!

VJ: Blade has just snapped on Cornette…OH!!!!! He rammed him headfirst into the Cell! Again!!!! Cornette…he's trying to hightail it out of here…

DD: Jimmy! Don't go up there! You dumb ass son of a bitch! Don’t climb…

VJ: Cornette is climbing the Cell to escape Blade!

DD: He's gonna die!!!!! He's gonna die!!!!!

VJ: Blade has chased Cornette to the roof of the Cell!!! Cornette…

DD: get out of there…OH NO!!!!

VJ: Blade just caught him with a hard right hand that sent him flying across the roof of the Cell!!!

DD: Damn it…would you 2 get uo there and help him!!!! Blade's gonna kill him!!!!

VJ: Iceberg and Glacier are rushing to try and save Cornette…Blade has him by the throat….

DD: No..don't do it!! Don't…I'll give you money if you don't do it!!!!! Do…

VJ: Look out Dave!!!

DD; AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

VJ: BLADE JUST CHOKESLAMMED CORNETTE OFF OF THE CELL AND THROUGH OUR ANNOUNCE TABLE!!!!!!!! CORNETTE HAS BEEN DESTROYED!!!! CORNETTE HAS BEEN DESTROYED!!!!!

DD: AAAAHHH…damn it Blade!!!! He just broke my good liquor!!!!

VJ: Blade just climbed down from the Cell as soon as Glacier gets up there…he's headed back to the locker room and look at the smile on his face!

DD: Yeah, I hope you and Demp destroy each other!!!! Punk ass! And get Cornette's head outta my lap!!!!!

VJ: I thought you liked that sorta thing?!

DD: (Pulls out his gun)…

VJ: Um…folks…

Rage: Damn it…where the hell were you????!

Ice Cube: I was trying to save our damn locker room! All of my good shit was in there!!

Rage: Damn it…(clutches his shoulder) ow!

EMT: I'll get you some ice for that…

Ice Cube: I'll get it, doc!

VJ: Oh my God…Ice Cube has a…

DD: Shut up! Damn snitch!

VJ: Ice Cube…he's sneaking up behind Rage with that lamb of leg…I mean that leg of lamb….why don't I just shut up?!

DD: That's what I've been saying all night long!!

BF: YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!!

Official: C'mon Big Foot! Calm down!

Ice Cube: What the f…

BF: You wanna try and take me out???! Huh?! You gotta problem with me, let's settle it right now! C'mon!!!

Ice Cube: Bring it, bitch!!

BF: YOU CALL THAT MATCH DOWN THE MIDDLE OR YOU'RE A DEADMAN! YOU HEAR ME???!

Ice Cube: F*CK YOU!!!! Pussy ass motherf*cker!

VJ: My God Dave! It's chaos back there!!!!!

DD: What was Ice Cube gonna do with that lamb leg???!

VJ: I don't know but I have a good idea! But look at the animosity between Ice Cube and the Champion! I don't think he can call the Main Event down the middle! Ice Cube is gonna try and screw somebody tonight!

DD: Stop causing trouble! The only person that Ice Cube's gonna be screwing tonight is your mother! Besides that, he's all screwed out!

VJ: You…you're too much!

VJ: Well ladies and gents, up next is the big Tag Team Title Battle royal! I don't know if the Riot MakerZ are ready after that attaaaaaaaaack!

DD: Johnson, get off your fat ass and show some respect for J Kenney!!!!

VJ: (Getting off the the ground) J Kenney is in the ring…

Kenney: Now earlier tonight…I posted an open contract in the back, whoever had the balls to sign it would face me here tonight!!! Well I've been told that somebody back there actually signed my little contract! I wonder who! Was it…RAGE?! (Crowd boos) Yeah, you're right! He's too much of a pussy to fight me tonight!

DD: HAHA!

Kenney: Or what about…Lightning?! (Crowd cheers) No! Not on the same night as his precious World Title match! What about…I don't know…Panther?!

DD: What's he doing here??!?

VJ: The Rock…the People's Champion has arrived! But why?!

Rock: (In that weird voice again) Insolent fool…(normal voice) damn! The Rock's voice just ain't what it used to be! Now jabroni, you wanna know who filled out your little contract?! Well let the Rock answer your question! No…it wasn't Rage! No! It wasn't Lightning, and the Rock can guaran-damn-tee that it wasn't that bonifide ROOODY POO CANDY ASS Panther! The man who signed that contract is without a shadow of a doubt THEE MOST ELECTRIFYING MAN IN SPORTS ENTERTAINMENT…Period! The man who signed that contract is the People's Champion! And jabroni, if you haven't figured it out by now, listen up, listen close, and listen good…cuz the MILLIONS…(AND MILLIONS) AND…MILLIONS of the Rock's fans are ch…

Kenney: Would you shut the hell up???! (CLOTHESLINE)

DD: OH!!!!! HAHAHA!

VJ: The Rock is down!!!!!

DD: Get him Kenney!! Yeah!!!

VJ: Kenney fires away with right hands......Rock is down in the corner and J Kenney is stomping a mudhole in him.

DD: Kenney's really on top of his game.

VJ: Ladies and gentlemen Delaware Dave has just said something that actually made sence.

DD: You damn right I did....(pauses) Are you making fun of me because if you are I'll bust a cap in your ass so fast you....you....When I think of something it'll be real good.

VJ: Sure Dave.....Rock with an irish whip.......Somoan drop and J Kenney is down....Cover....1....2....Kenney gets the shoulder up.

DD: Aww screw it. You're not worth thinking that hard over.

VJ: Looks like Rock is doing pretty good since he came back from being kidnapped  by Shredder and the Foot Clan. Nobody knows why they kidnapped Rock.

DD: I do. Shredder is really the illegitamate father of Scarlet KV and he was worried Rock was going to beat KV for one of his titles so he kidnapped him.

VJ: (shaking his head) Where do you get this crap?!

DD: Where else, the Psychic Freinds Network.

VJ: Oh my!.......Back to the action in the ring, Rock is still in control of this one......OH!!!!!! Rock planted Kenney with a hellacios DDT.....Rocks picking him up.....Kenney catches him with a low blow....He should be disqualified right now....Irish whip by Kenney....Oh he's got Rock tied up in the ropes.....He's hammering away now......the ref is pulling Kenney back

DD: What the hell?!?!?!

VJ: Some guy in an Anarchy mask just nailed J Kenney with a lead pipe....Rock is free and makes the cover......1....2......3

DD: NOOOOO!!!

VJ: J Kenney just lost to Rock because some guy in an Anarchy mask hit him with a lead pipe......The ref didn't see it because he was getting  Rock untangled from the ropes.

DD: But I thought that J Kenney was Anar…who the hell was that, Vince?!

VJ: I wish I knew!!!! Anarchy…well J Kenney is down. This guy in the Anarchy mask is headed to the back…what the hell is going on here?!

HBK: Hey, you got a problem boy?!

Squirrel: My problem ain't with you! Panther…I heard you seen Merlino.

Panther: Maybe.

Squirrel: Tell me where he is!

Panther: (looks Squirrel in the face) You really wanna know?!

Squirrel: Yeah!

Panther: Well…(scratches his head) It's kinda hard to say. Last I heard he was giving free BJ's on the corner of "Like I" and "Really give a sh*t"! Why don't you head over there and get one cuz I heard you like that kinda stuff…

Squirrel: Aight smart-ass. Let me tell you something, when I find that punk ass Merlino and his Man, I'm gonna bury this sledgehammer in the back of his head. But me and you…it's not over! Now excuse me…I gotta match right now!

Sniper: Hey Trish! You think you really pulled something last night, huh?!

Krazed: Sniper, go f*ck yourself!

Sniper: Oh! OK big shot. You're hot sh*t now that you have the Booker on your side…oh damn wait a minute! Didn't…she's not the Booker anymore is she?!

Trish: What the hell are you talking about?! You and Firestorm made me the Booker again when we the Posse joined up…

Sniper: You got a contract?!

Trish: Uh…well…

Sniper: Didn't think so!

Krazed: So what?!

Sniper: So what that means is just like Panther and his little buddies here tonight…you're done!

VJ: OH!!!!! The Posse from behind on Krazed!!!!!!!! Did you hear what he just said Dave?!

DD: HAHA! He's a genius! I knew he'd come through!

VJ: My goodness! The 9^th Street Posse is assaulting Krazed…Angel and Fredo have him by the hair…OH NO!!!!! They just rammed him headfirst into the wall! For the 2^nd time in 24 hrs Krazed is being assaulted…and look at that no good bitch Maria! She's making Trish watch this!

DD: Be thankful she's not making Trish eat the concrete cuz…OOOH! Did you see that, Vince?!

VJ: Maria just DDT'd Trish! Trish and Krazed…they've been mugged in the parking lot!!!!!! The Posse…damn them! Damn them to hell!!!!!

JC: Let's do this!

VJ: Wait just a minute! Look out Rodney…OH!!!! That masked man just took another swing at Demp…Killa with a huge clothesline just took him down!!!!

DD: C'mon!!!!! this is assault!!!

VJ: The Elites…the Elites are assaulting whoever this masked man is in the aisle! He just tried to get another attack in on Killa and look at this! They're gonna try and unmask him!!

DD: Go on! Get away!!!

VJ: They're gonna try…OH!!!! The masked man with a low blow on Killa and once again he makes an escape! Who the hell is that Dave????! I demand to know!

DD: Why ya yellin at me?! It wasn't me!

VJ: Ok Shaggy.

VJ: Here we go!!! Tonight the vacant Tag Team Titles will finally be decided!!!!!

DD: Look at Rage! Go Rage go!!!!

VJ: Rage…my God! He's all over Rodney in the corner! To win this match you must fight through those lumberjacks on the floor, get the ladder, bring it back to the ring and grab the Tag Title belts…OOOOOH!

DD: SWEET JEEEEEEEEEEEESUS!

VJ: Demp with a hard cane shot to the head…Geez! He knocked the skin off of his back…and another! Demp is beating the hell out of Rage with that cane!!! Here comes Insane…OH!!! He catches a shot and is knocked out to the fl…

DD: What in the living damn ass hell kinda crap is that????!

VJ: Zydrex!! Zydrex and Justin Credible are putting the boots to Insane! Insane is being mugged on the outside…OH!!!!!!

DD: Extremist don't play that, Vince!

VJ: Extremist is in there and now he's helping out his tag partner! Total Eclipse is trying to fight off both Zydrex and and Justin Credible…WATCH OUT FOR RAGE!!!!

DD: Look ohhh!!!!!!!

VJ: Plancha!!!! Rage up and over the top rope comes right down onto the head of The Extremist! Rage and the Extremist! Rage and the Extremist!!

DD: Watch it, you idiot! He is the guy that's gonna referee you're title match later on, ya know!

VJ: Rage just said damn the title match! He's getting a piece of his ass right here!

DD: I don't think he said that, Vince!

VJ: Well…Ice Cube is over here now…he just nailed The Extremist…Killa from behind with an axehandle blow…

DD: Would you look at that treacherous bastard Demp???!

VJ: Huh…oh! Demp…the lumberjacks are all busy!!! Demp is getting the ladder! Demp is gonna get the ladder!!!

DD: Oh no, Vince! I think the Elites may be the new tag team champions! That'd be worse than Canada…

VJ Wait a minute! Squirrel is headed out to the floor…

DD: That's right! He forgot about…OOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!! YEAH!!!! IT'S SLAMFEST BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

VJ: Squirrel with a HARD sledgehammer shot right to the ribs of Rodney!!!!!! Rodney Demp…he may have just broke his ribs!!!!!!

DD: I'm diggin it, baby!!!! Get him again! Get him again!

VJ: Squirrel has Demp by the hair…OHHHHH!!!!!!!! He just dropped Rodney rib first across the steel stairs!!!!!! Squirrel has just laid out Rodney and now he's headed back into the ring with the ladder!!!!!

DD: Here we go! Right here, Total Domination for the 3^rd time the NFWA Tag Team champs!!!!

VJ: Squirrel has the ladder set up in the ring and now he's making the climb!!!!!!!! There's no one in the ring! Squirrel has a clear path to the…

DD: Here comes Rage!!!!!!!

VJ: Uh oh!!! Rage is back in the ring and he has Squirrel's ankle…OH!!!!!!! Squirrel catches him right in the face with a boot!!!

DD: He almost knocked his face off!!!!!!!!

VJ: Squirrel…he just staggered back to the buckle…OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!

DD: HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! Did you see that!!!! Ride em!!!!!!

VJ: Squirrel just hopped off he ladder and caught Rage with a Nutt Buster!!!! My God!!!! That was from 10 ft up in the air!!!!!!!! Nutt Buster…Insane is back in the ring with that ladder!!! Insane is gonna make the climb…wait a minute! No he's not…no he's--OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

DD: OH MY GOD!!!!!!

VJ: Insane…he just skateboarded that ladder into the back of the head of Squirrel while he was doing the Nutt Buster! That hurt both he and Rage!!!!!!

DD: It may be over! He's got a clear path to the gold now!!!

VJ: Insane…he's setting up the ladder…what the hell did Ice Cube just do?! What the…he just pulled a ladder from underneath the ring!!!!! What in the hell is he doing?!

DD: I don't know, Vince!!! What…he's going in the ring!

VJ: Ice Cube is in the ring…he just Insane is making the climb up the ladd…OH NO!!!!!!! Ice Cube just tossed that ladder right into the face of Insane!!!!! Insane…my God he's out of it!!!!

DD: Yeah! No one can stop the almighty Ice Cube…except the guy standing behind him!!! Look out!!!!

VJ: Uh oh!!!! The Extremist is in the ring…Ice Cube doesn't see him!!!!

DD: Ice Cube…turn around!

VJ: OH!!!! Forearm shot to the back of the head!!!

DD: Ring the damn bell! This idiot is a lumberjack! He's not involved…

VJ: They're both lumberjacks. Nutbrain!!!!! And the Extremist has Ice Cube…X-STREAMLINER!!!!!!!!! THE EXTREMIST HAS JUST FLOORED ICE CUBE…Rage is has that cane…WHAM!!!!!!! He just knocked the hell out of The Extremist!

DD: Yeah! Get the f*ck outta the ring, bitch!!!!!! I spit on you!!!!!

VJ: Rage has just floored the Extremist and now he's setting up that ladder! Rage is setting up the ladder and now he's making the climb! The Riot MakerZ may be inches away from re-claiming the World Tag Team Belts!!!!

DD: Watch out for that Idiot Kill…HAHAHAAA!!!!! Did you see that fool fly????!

VJ: ICE BREAKER TO KILLA!!!!!! Killa just got put down!!!! Zydrex is up on the apron…OH!!!!!!! Ice Cube just nailed him with the Singapore Cane!!!! OH!!!! Squirrel catches a shot! Storm catches one too! Rodney…he catches…ICE CUBE IS GOING CRAZY! HE'S BEATING EVERYONE IN SIGHT WITH THAT CANE!!!!!

DD: Go on Rage!!!!! You've almost got the belts!! Vince, put those filthy hands of yours to good use and pour me a glass of fine wine! I think we've got brand new champs, Rage, Ice Cube…THE RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

VJ: ICE CUBE TIPPED THE LADDER OVER!!! RAGE JUST CLOTHESLINED HIMSELF ON THE TOP ROPE!!!!! MY GOD…

DD: IT FINALLY HAPPENED! IT FINALLY HAPPENED!!!! ICE CUBE JUST TURNED ON RAGE!!!!!!!!!

VJ: Don't say that! I think it was an accident! Ice Cube is trying to help Rage back up to his feet…OH MY GOD!!!!! ICE BREAKER ON RAGE!!!! ICE BREAKER ON RAGE!!!!!!

DD: I TOLD YA VINCE!! NEVER DOUBT THE DAVENESS!!!!!

VJ: Ice Cube is stomping the hell out of his partner!!! There's been speculation for weeks! It has finally happened!!!! Singapor cane shot after shot after shot…Squirrel is headed over to…OH!!!! He catches a shot to the ribs…RODNEY WITH A FLOWING DDT ON ICE CUBE!!!!!!

DD: Man…I can't believe I just saw that, Vince!

VJ: Ice Cube…he is down after the flowing DDT…Rage is down after the Ice Breaker…the Riot Makerz are dead I presume…Demp is setting up the ladder and he's making the climb!!! Demp is on his way to get the tag team gold!!!!! Demp…

DD: Wait a minute! This idiot Storm…he's setting up a ladder too!

VJ: That same ladder that that Ice Cube brought into the ring…Lance Storm is climbing that ladder!!!! Rodney…he has a hand on the belt…OH NO!!!!!! Lance Storm with a low blow and Rodney goes down!

DD: HAHA! I think Lance just went down on Rodney!

VJ: EWWWWWW! THAT'S DISGUSTING!!!! YOU PER…

DD: I meant a low blow, damn it!!! Geez!!!

VJ: Oh! You can never tell with you!

DD: Hey, he may be Canadian but his name ain't Vince Johnson! Call the match, skankhole!

VJ: What's that supposed to mean?!?! Storm is headed up that ladder…Squirrel is climbing the other side! Rodney is trying to get his wits back about him so that he can continue his climb!!! Squirrel and Storm…they're both atop the ladder…OH!!!!! They're trading blows!!!!! They're going back and forth with right hands…wait a damn minute!!! Justin Credible is in the ring and he's got Squirrel's ankle…c'mon! Get him outta there!

DD: This is flagrantly illegal! Vince, I demand that he be shot!!!!!!

VJ: You're the one with the gun…forget I said that! Storm…he has his hand on the Title…OH!!!!!!! Insane!!!! Insane is on top of the other ladder and he just nailed Lance Storm!!!!

DD: He knocked his head off with that…wait a minute!!!!

VJ: Zydrex just pulled Credible to the floor…OH!!!!! He just nailed him with a hard clothesline!!!! Zydrex is doing a number on Credible on the floor…Zydrex has a steel chair now…Credible with a double leg takedown…we've got a brawl on the arena floor! Back in the ring, Insane and Lance Storm are on dueling ladders! They're trading blows…

DD: Watch Squirrel, you idiots!

VJ: Squirrel is up in the top rung…he's got the be…OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH!!!!!!

DD: SWWWWEEEEET MERCIFUL CRAP!!!!!!! DID YOU HEAR THAT??!

VJ Rodney with a singapore cane shot to the head of Squirrel from the top of the other ladder…OH!!!!!!! There's one for Insane…there's one for Storm!!!!! Demp is beating the hell out of all 3 participants…Squirrel with a thumb to the eye…Rodney just dropped the cane…

DD: Now throw him off the ladder!! Break his bones! Break his…

VJ: Lance Storm just raked the face of Squirrel! He steps a rung higher…he's gonna get the…low blow by Squirrel!!!!!!!!! Storm…HE GOES ALLL THE WAY DOWN!!!!!!!!!

DD: C' Mon Squirrel! Now! Do it for them bitches back in B-ham!!!!!

VJ: We apologize for that ladies and gentlemen. Squirrel is up on the top rung of….OOOOOOOOOOOOH GOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!! OH GOD!!!!!!!!!!

DD: He's dead, Vince!!!!!!!

VJ: KILLA JUST RUSHED THE RING AND SHOVED THE LADDER DOWN!!! SQUIRREL WENT CRASHING TO THE ARENA FLOOR!!!!

DD: What a damn cheater!!! Somebody get that little…yeah!

VJ: The Extremist is in the ring and now he and Killa are trading blows! Meanwhile, Rodney and Insane are still battling it out atop the remaining ladder…Insane…he's up on the very top rung of the ladder and…he's trying to pull Demp up with him!

DD: Look up!!! The belts are right there! Just reach up there and you'll have them…

VJ: He may try a piledriver off the ladder!!!! A piledriver or powerbomb or something…I've never ever seen this before! That'll kill Demp!!!!

DD: Huh?! Well I've been waiting for this since the day this idiot walked into the NFWA!!!!! Insane…this is gonna be gr…

VJ: He's trying to lift Demp up…OH!!!!!! Rodney with a nut shot…ROOOOOOO---OHHHHHH! OH GOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!

DD; NOOOOOOOOO!

VJ: RODNEY DEMP WITH A BACK BODY DROP OFF THE TOP OF THE LADDER SENDS INSANE FLYING OVER THE TOP ROPE AND TO THE FLOOR!!!!! INSANE IS DOWN…RODNEY…RODNEY…HE'S GOT THE GOLD!!!!!!!!

DD: No good BASTARD!!!!!!!

DD: This is the darkest moment in the NFWA!!!!!!

VJ: Rodney and Killa are champions again!!!!!!! Rodney and Killa have done it!!!!!!! Give credit to ever…well Ice Cube is headed to the back…Rage…Rage look pissed! I can't believe that we just had the Riot MakerZ explode in this match!!!!!

DD: Vince…this is gay! This is gay and lesbian!!!! I can't believe the stinking Elites have the belts!!

VJ: Folks…wow what a match that was and what a match this is gonna be!!!!! It’s Scarlet KV Vs Rage!!!!!! Let's show you how this one came about!!!!

VJ: Uh huh!

VJ: Rage is getting revenge!!! Rage is getting payback from the tag team match when Ice Cube turned his back on him and look at Rage…MY GOD HE'S LOST IT!!!!!

DD: Somebody get this idiot out of there! He's assaulting an official!!!!

VJ: Rage has Ice Cube by the hair..OH!!!!!! He slammed him into a mirror!!!! Rage has those knux now and he's beating the living hell out of his former tag team partner!!!! Officials…they're trying to pull Rage out of there!

DD: What those skankholes need to do is get a tazor and shock his ass!! Rage had no right doing what he did to Ice Cube!!!

Rage: Looks like you WON'T be refing the world title match tonight.. will ya? Oh, and just in case you didn't know.. the Riot MakerZ... are OVER!

VJ: Rage has…oh my goodness. What the hell?! Scarlet KV is climbing the Scaffold!!!!!! The match hasn't even started yet and he's climbing the scaffold! Is he crazy!

DD: Obviously! Whoever said that a mind is a terrible thing to waste obviously forgot to tell this guy! He's nuts!

VJ: That has to be the single worst line in the history of Color Commentary. KV is atop the Scaffold…he's waiting for his opponent and…

DD: That idiot…

VJ: Rage is headed to ringside…whoa!!!!!!! He just nailed the Extremist with a right hand and the Extremist goes down!!!!!!!

DD: I told ya he's an idiot! He beat up 2 officials already, fine and suspend his punk ass!

VJ: Rage is climbing the scaffold…Scarlet KV is saying bring it! As JR would say…

DD: Screw that faggot! Here we go!!!!

VJ: KV has the handblade!!!! Look out Rage!!!

DD: WHOA!!!!!

VJ: Scarlet KV just tried to stab Rage in the back of the head!!!! Rage just happened to roll out of the way!! KV…once again he just tried to chop his head off!!!!!! Rage…he rolls out of the way…OH NO!!!!!!!

DD: HAHA!!!!! PAYBACK TIME!!!!!!!!!!!

VJ: Rage just rolled right off of the edge of the Scaffold! He just grabbed onto the edge….Rage is hanging!!!! Rage's life is literally hanging by a thread!

DD: Yeah! And Scarlet KV is about to cut that thread!! This will be the end of Rage!

VJ: Rage is pulling himself back up to the Scaffold…NO!!!! Don't do that!!!

DD: DO IT!!! DO IT!!!!! MAKE HIM BLEEEEEED!!!!!!

VJ: Scarlet KV is standing over Rage with that hand blade…he would…Rage…he just grabbed KV's ankle and he goes down!!!! Rage…

DD: Get up!!!!

VJ: Rage is back up on the scaffold now and…oh my! Look at him go!!!! Rage is hammering away with right hands to the side of the head of Scarlet KV!!!!! The I-C Champion has been rocked!!!!! Rage has him by the hair now…he picks up Scarlet KV…he just might toss him over the side, Dave!

DD: That would be a tragedy…LOOK OUT!!!!!!

VJ: Rage with a clothesline sends Scarlet KV staggering to the edge of the scaffold…

DD: Watch it!! There's not too much room up there!!!!!

VJ: Rage grabs Scarlet by the hair…he's got him up for a belly to back…OH!!!!! He just sliced Rage in the face with that hand…OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

DD: OH MY GOD!!!!!

VJ: Rage and Scarlet KV just tumbled off the scaffold, through the Cell and just went crashing into the ring!!!!!!!!! My God…they're both out!!!!

DD: Extremist, get your ass in the ring and help poor Scarlet KV!!!

VJ: Scarlet…neither man is moving!!!!! The Extremist just went into the Cell and you know he'd like to get back at Rage for what he did before the match…wait! He is!!!

DD: I always knew I like this Extremist guy!!!

VJ: Extremist is gonna attack…no! He just checked on him to see if Rage was conscious!

DD: Awww…what a pussy!

VJ: Please watch your language!

DD: Why don't you lick my ass, skankhole?!

VJ: (Sighs) Both KV and Rage are out…wait! Extremist is gonna count them down!!!!! I guess if they can't answer the count…I guess this match will end in a draw!

DD: A draw?! That's like kissing Vince Johnson's sister, and believe me that's not a good thing.

VJ: Why don't you leave me alone tonight?! There's the count…1…2…3…4…5…6…Scarlet KV is moving! The Extremist said let's wrestle!!

DD: Alright!!!! Vince, when will you realize that Scarlet KV is invincible?! He can't be stopped!

VJ: Invincible! He's lying on the mat holding his elbow…it may be broken!!!!

DD: It is not! He has bones of steel!

VJ: The Extremist is checking the arm to see if it's broken…Rage has been sliced wide open by that hand blade! He's bleeding like a horse…uh oh! Scarlet just shoved the Extremist aside and now he's headed over to Rage with that hand blade!!!!!!! Rage is already cut and he's gonna do it again!! NO!!!!!

DD: Ye…oh. What's wrong Scarlet?!

VJ: Huh?! Scarlet KV is trying to lift his arm….he can't lift it! It has to be broken!!! It has to be!!!!

DD: No it's not…he just banged it up a little…NO!!!!!!!!

VJ: RAGE WITH A SINGLE ARM DDT!!!!! SCARLET KV…HE'S SCREAMING IN PAIN!! If his arm wasn't broken before, it has to be now! It has to be!!!!

DD: That damn heathen Rage!!!!

VJ: Scarlet KV's arm is broken…and Rage just snatched the hand blade!!!

DD: Theif!!!!!! That doesn't belong to you! Put it down!

VJ: Rage is putting it on!! Rage…how he's even standing I don't know but he's fixing to stab Scarlet KV…NO!!!!! Scarlet just low blowed Rage with his good arm! What a cheap shot!

DD: You do anything to survive in a brutal match like this! Anything!

VJ: Scarlet KV, broken…aww man! His arm is just hanging out of the socket! Extremist may have to stop this one here! OH!!!

DD: His arm may be broke, but so is Rage's face after that shot!

VJ: Scarlet KV just kicked Rage right in the face! And again!!! Rage…he's getting the proverbial mudhole stomped…

DD: In his ASSS!!!!!

VJ: You ok?! Scarlet KV…he's climbing the ropes!

DD: With a broken arm!!! There's a real man for ya, Vince! Stop winking at him! Fruit!

VJ: I was not…I'm not even gonna respond to you! Scarlet KV has managed to mount the ropes…Rage is getting back to his feet…BULLDOG FROM THE TOP!!!!!!!!

DD: WITH A BROKEN ARM!!!!!! Amazing isn't it!

VJ: Gutsy indeed!

DD: You heartless bastard! You need to show some damn respect for Scarlet KV! I've seen people die from arm injuries that severe! Look at it!

VJ: His arm is…he's going back up to the top!!! Rage is in the center of the ring…the Extremist is asking Scarlet if he's sure! Scarlet KV is trying to fight off the pain…what's he doing here?! OHHHHH…

DD: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

VJ: OH MY!!!!!! Scarlet just went airborne and Rage raised the hand blade!!! Scarlet KV just dove rib first onto that hand blade!!!! He…

DD; MURDERER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Damn that idiot Rage to hell!! Damn him!!!!

VJ: KV has been sliced and now…Rage just rolled out to the floor! He just pulled out a chair from underneath the ring…and a table!!!!! Rage just threw a chair and…and now he just threw a gas can!!!

DD: OK, this Rage is murderer, he's obviously a pedophile, and to top it off he's gonna add arson to the list! Give him the chair!!!!

VJ: Rage has that steel chair…

DD: Not that chair!!!

VJ: Rage…he's dousing the chair in gasoline!!!! Rage…tell me he's not! Tell me…he's got matches…oh boy!!! The chair has been set on fire!!!! Rage has that flaming chair in hand…will you listen to this crowd!

DD: NO!

VJ: Well they're about to blow the roof off of this arena!

DD: Oh my God…Scarlet…stay down…stay down…OH NO!!!!!!!

VJ; FLAMING CHAIRSHOT TO THE HEAD!!!!!!! Rage has just nailed Scarlet KV who was actually trying to get back up…it's all academic now! All Rage has to do is put Scarlet KV through a flaming table and it's over…and that's what he's about to do!!!!

DD: Oh no! That's all we need! Flaming WOOOOOOOOOD!

VJ: What do you have some kind of speech impediment or something?! Rage is dousing the table in gasoline! Rage…the Extremist isn't doing anything to stop this! Despite the attack on Rage earlier tonight he has been calling this thing down the middle! Rage has matches…the table has been set ablaze!!!!

DD: Somebody call the fire department!!!!

VJ: Rage has Scarlet KV by the hair! Blood is all over the ring and this is the end…Rage is gonna go for a powerbomb…here we go…KV COUNTERS…DDT THROUGH THE FLAMING TABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! UNBELIEVABLE!!!!! I don't like KV but you've gotta give him credit!!!! He's got spunk!

DD: Yup! That's one spunky mother…

VJ: Shut yo mouth!!!!

DD: (Punches Johnson in the nose) Ignant bastard!

VJ: That was just uncalled for. Rage has been put down…Scarlet KV…Extremist is asking him if he wants to stop it but Scarlet KV is continuing on! He just rolled out to the arena floor…what in the hell?! He's lifting the stairs!!!! Scarlet KV is putting the stairs in the ring! This guy's nuts!

DD: Extremist, you inconsiderate fool! Get out there and help the man! You see he has a broken arm!

VJ: Extremist is calling it down the middle. The Stairs have been shoved into the ring and now what…he's got more wood!

DD: Yeah! This is the end of Rage right here!

VJ: I doubt Rage has any broken bones, but he looks like he's out of it after the…Scarlet just fell!!! The blood loss must be taking it's toll on both men!!! Scarlet..he somehow finds the strength to get back into the ring…he's setting the table up now!!!!!

DD: Bye bye Rage!!!! Hope he snaps your damn neck!

VJ: Scarlet…he just lit the table on fire!!! This is it!!! Scarlet KV is picking up what's left of Rage…

DD: OH! Finish him with his own move!

VJ: He wouldn't!!!! Scarlet KV looks to be going for Total Annihilation through the flaming table!!

DD: This is the end of Rage Vince! I can't wait to the burial! I'll piss on his grave!

VJ: Here it comes…OH!!!!! Rage just bit KV's armpit…ewww!

DD: I sure hope that KV is Sure!

VJ: Huh?! Rage with a low blow on Scarlet KV!!!!! He turns it around now! Rage just climbed atop those steel stairs and he has Scarlet hooked!

DD: Oh my God! No!!!!!

VJ: TOTAL ANNIHILATION THROUGH THE TABLE!!!!!!!!!! He's done!!!!! He's done!! Rage is down! KV is down!!!!! Blood is everywhere…I think KV is out of it! Extremist is putting the count down…1…2…3…4….5…6…7…8…9…10!!!!! Rage has done it!!!

VJ: Rage has done it, Dave! Rage has done it!

DD: Rage has cheated!!! Since when has throwing your opponent through a table and stabbing him been legal in a match?!

VJ: It was in the rules! Both men agree…

DD: Bullsh*t! I say that this freak Rage just violated the 1^st amendment, and he needs to be disposed of!!!!

VJ: Well I say congrats to Rage, and to the Extremist, who despite his hatred towards Rage called it down the--son of a bitch!!!!!!!

DD: He called it down the son of a bitch!? You been smoking my sh*t or something?!

VJ: Extremist just hit Rage with that steel chair! He picks him back up…X-STREAMLINER!!!!!!!!! C'mon!!!!!!! This is horrible!!!! This is dispicable!

DD: This is great!

VJ: After this great athletic contest, this no good Extremist has assaulted Rage and we've got officials on their way out to the ring! They're trying to get the Extremist out of here…man! Anything can happen here tonight on pay-per-view!

Joey: (On the phone) Hey…yeah it's me! Listen…some of these guys around here been giving me sh*t tonight…you heard?! (Pause) Good! I think maybe you're gonna have to…(spots the camera man) Get outta here!!!!! Get…I SAID GET OUTTA HERE!!!!!!

DD: Man! I like this Merlino guy! If he had a mustache he'd be cooler than me!

VJ: Uh….sure. Who was that Joey was talking to?! Was it the Man?!

DD: Why do you ask so many damn questions?! You've gotta be the nosiest sumbitch on the face of the planet!

Kurt Angle: Now I bet everyone is wondering why I am back after I said about alittle more than a month ago that I couldnt come back to the NFWA ever again. Well I did say I couldnt ever wrestle ever again in the NFWA because of my injury at the last PPV. By one of the staff members of the NFWA asked me to come back about 2 weeks ago and I told him or her that I couldn’t because of my injury. But then I was told by him or her that I wouldnt come back as a wrestle but come back as a NFWA Booker!

DD and VJ: WHAT????!!!!!

DD: This…this is the greatest thing I've ever heard!!! Did ya hear that, Vince?!

VJ: How…who appointed Kurt Angle…he's gotta be lying!

DD: Shut up and let THE BOOKER speak!

Kurt: I couldnt turn down a job like that so I snached it when it was up in the air. I am planning on being the best booker that the NFWA will ever have. So I already started planning. I was so impressed seeing the last match between Rage and Scarlet KV and now since Rage won the match, I say that he will go on to face the NFWA Champion of the World winner tonight at FNS for the Title! Also The Elites!!!! I have a match for you and that will be revealed at FNS! IM Finally Back, and I will, see all of the superstars in the back and greet them,

if you want a match come ask me and tell me why you want one and your wish will be granted, and that my friends is TRUE! DAMN TRUE!

DD: What a great night to be a wrestling fan! The Olympic Bad Ass is back baby!

VJ: I can't believe it!

DD: You love it don't you?! C'mon…now normally I would never associate myself with a moose-licking piece of Yak sh*t such as you, Johnson, but out of celebration of the return of Kurt Angle, why don't we engage in a little toast?! (Pulls out 2 blunts and hands one to Johnson. He lights up) To Kurt!!!!!

VJ: (Snaps his blunt in half and tosses it on the ground) You've got some serious problems!

DD: (Puffing) Whaa?! My sh*t ain't good enough for ya?!

VJ: (Sighs) Ladies and gentlemen…up next we've got the Toughman Finals, Rodney Demp battles Blade to crowd a new Toughman Champion! Let's show you the road these 2 men took to get to the Finals!

DD: Need to free your mind!

VJ: You need to shut up!!!!

DD: Vince, next time I hear Britney Spears on an NFWA show I swear I'll bust a cap in somebody's ass!

clue what his burns are he is definitely hurt….Rodney Demp has finally been

put out….what a freaking match……

VJ: Yes! And how about our next match! This match…the final battle for control! Right here…Panther, Chyna and Shawn Michaels take on Prez Firestorm, Commish Sniper and Triple H! If Panther and his team are successful, he will once again be in control of the NFWA! If not…

DD: They're outta here!!!!!!

VJ: Let's give you a little background on this one!

VJ: What's going on out there?!

VJ: The music has stopped in the middle…wait! That's Trish! Trish Stratus!!!

DD: Oh great! THE REFEREE is here!

Trish: Ok…Sniper, Firestorm…I see how it is! Kurt Angle's the other booker now, right?! Kurt Angle has my job…(laughs) and Krazed is fired. Krazed…he can't referee this match cuz I'm not the booker and I don't have the power to appoint him! Is that right?! (laughs) Well…this referee does not have the power to appoint Krazed the official for this match!

DD: Go Posse! WHOOOO!

Trish: But…this referee does!!!!!!! (Points back to the entrance where Head Referee Jim Jonathan steps out through the curtains)

DD: Uh oh! Vince…I don't like this!

JJ: Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you the special guest referee for this match…KRAZED!!!!!!!

DD: NOOOOOOO!!!!

VJ: OH MY!!! TRISH HAS JUST STUCK IT TO THE LOD AND THE POSSE!!!!

DD: She has got to be assassinated!!!!!

DD: This guy is an idiot! He…can't referee this match!

VJ: Why not?!

DD: Well for one, he doesn't know how to count to 3. And 2^nd, he's gonna try and screw the Posse and Firestorm! Look at that hungry look in his eyes! I can see it!

VJ: Krazed is refereeing this one, whether Sniper, Firestorm or the Game like it or not!

VJ: Dave…can you feel the electricity????!

DD: Yeah! I can't wait until the end of this match when we never ever have to see Panther's ugly face again!!!! They'll never win with a woman as their partner!

VJ: It looks like it's gonna be Triple H starting off for the LOD/Posse coalition and Panther starting off…watch Panther. Chyna just handed him a bottle of water…

DD: Look at him! He's so jealous of Hunter it's unreal…HEY!!!!

VJ: OH! Panther just spit water all over Triple H!!!!!! Triple H is furious!!!!

DD: That damn…look at him!

VJ: Panther, Chyna and Michaels are laughing…uh oh!!! The Game from behind just knocked Panther to the floor with an axehandle…aww come on!!!!!

DD: HAHA! She wanted to be in there so bad!

VJ: Triple H is all over Chyna in the corner!! OH! Michaels takes a right hand to the head!!! Hunter is mauling Chyna…c'mon! This isn't right!

DD: She looks like a man, might as well treat her like one too! HA!

VJ: Panther's gonna kill you! Triple H has Chyna…Irish whip…Chyna reverses and sends the Game into the ropes…WHOA!!!! Hunter almost scored with a clothesline but Chyna ducked it…OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!

DD: Cheater!!!!!

VJ: Chyna with a drop toe hold and Panther…out of nowhere with a dropkick to the face of Triple H on the way down!!! My God what a tandem move…he almost knocked the Game's head off!

DD: I think they broke his nose! That's fatal cuz it takes up about 80% of his body…look out!!!

VJ: Sniper charges the ring and misses Panther with a clothesline..CHYNA DOWNSTAIRS!!!! PANTHER WITH A SPINEBUSTER!!!!! Sniper has been drilled and here comes the Prez…OH!!!!!! HBK out of nowhere with a flying forearm!!!! Look at Shawn go! Rapid-fire punches right to the noggin of Prez Firestorm!!!

DD: Damn it Krazed!! What kind of a worthless son of a …OHH HOO HOO!!!!! Did you see that?!

VJ: What power by Prez Firestorm! With 1 hand he just tossed Shawn Michaels across the ring!!!!

DD: What about it now, Vince! That's proof Firestorm and the Posse can't be stopped!

VJ: Firestorm has Michaels by the hair now…headbutt and the Heartbreak Kid goes down! Chyna charges in..she catches a big boot! Panther just floored with a backhand shot by this monster of a Prez!! Firestorm has Michaels now…

DD: Break him in half!!!

VJ: Firestorm with an Irish whip sends Shawn crashing hard into the buckle…Firestorm follows in…OH!!!!!! Nobody home!!!

DD: Damn it!! Look out Prez!

VJ: Shawn with a dropkick sends Firestorm back into the buckle! Triple H charges at Shawn…Shawn with a back body drop sends the Game right over the top! He lands right on Sniper, who was on the floor to get a rest!!!!

DD: Damn it, Vincent! How much of this blue collar bullsh*t is Krazed gonna let Panther and the gang get away with?!

VJ: Firestorm…he's out of it in the corner…watch Chyna! Handspring elbow!!!!!! Right on the jaw of Firestorm!!!!! The Prez is getting rocked in there…

DD: Where the hell is the DQ?!

VJ: Chyna…she and Michaels are having a conversation with Krazed…

DD: Watch that idiot Panther!

VJ: Huh…Panther just signalled for something…

DD: Wait a damn…OH NO! TURN AROUND KRAZED!! LOOOOK! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

VJ: SWEET BABY JESUS!!!!!!!!! RAPID-FIRE…OW!!!! RAPID-FIRE LOW BLOWS TO PREZ FIRESTORM!!!! (Cringes) Geez…he had to hit him with about 20 kicks straigh south…here comes Shawn Michaels with a clothesline…both men over the top…NO! Shawn holds on!! Delaware, what about it?!

DD: Krazed is without a shadow of a doubt the most biased referee in the history of Canada!

VJ: Krazed is from New York!

DD: Well I saw we deport his ass anyway! Have him picking coffee beans for Juan Valdez or something! I dunno!

VJ: That's Columbia, jackass!!!!! The LOD/Posse are having a meeting of the minds on the floor. Things aren't starting off the way they planned.

DD: Well how can their plan work when we've got Panther and Michaels breaking every rule in the book! And Krazed is letting it go! That damn Trish! That damn Krazed! That damn Bob Costas!

VJ: Sniper…Sniper looks to be trying to calm Firestorm and Triple H down…watch Shawn Michaels…HBK is on the top!

DD: Move gang!! NO!!!!

VJ: High cross body!!!! Shawn just took out the entire trio!!!!!!! OH!!! Jovan!!!! Jovan is hammering away with right hands to the head…

DD: Look in the ring!!

VJ: Uh oh!!! Chyna…Chyna has Panther up for a Gorilla Press slam!!!! What in the world…OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!!

DD: She's not human!!!!!!

VJ: Chyna just launched Panther over the top rope and he landed right on top of Jovan!!!! Panther and Michaels have Triple H by the hair now…they send him back into the ring where Chyna is waiting…DDT!!!!! Cover…1…2…OH!!!! Kickout by Triple H!

DD: What a fast count!!!

VJ: Triple H is on Dream Street!

DD: They have one of those in Jersey?!

VJ: Every town has a Drean Street! Chyna backs Hunter into the buckle…hard kick to the midsection!!!! There's another!!!! Chyna…she makes the tag into Panther now! Double Irish whip into the ropes…double elbow sends the Game to the mat! Panther with the cover…1…2…kickout by Triple H!

DD: Those counts just get faster and faster!

VJ: Panther winds up on the arm of Triple H…OH! Leg drop into a modified armbar! There's the tag to Shawn Michaels and…he wouldn't! Shawn is headed up to the top rope…Panther still has that armbar locked in…OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! FLYING ELBOW DROP INTO THE ARM OF TRIPLE H!!!

DD: That may be out 2^nd broken arm of the night!

VJ: Helmsley is writhing in pain! HBK with the cover…1…2…kickout!!!! Michaels…going right back to work on the arm! The team of Panther, Chyna and Michaels are not trying to brawl! They're trying to wrestle this one and they're winning thus far!

DD: They're cheating thus far if you ask me!

VJ: Well I didn't! Triple H trying to roll out of that armbar…he's back to his knees and he's got a handful of hair!

DD: Bite him!

VJ: Shut up! Krazed trying to get Hunter off of Shawn's hair!

DD: Bite him! Krazed!

VJ: Will you stop?! Krazed is trying to pull Hunter…Panther is headed into the ring and Krazed holds him back…OH! Low blow!!!!! Damn it!

DD: HA! I don't see how that hurt him! I didn't think Shawn had balls!

VJ: Shawn Michaels…aww he's hurt! Triple H hits off the ropes…facebuster!!!!! DDT!!!!!! He just drilled Michaels and look at Sniper! Sniper is begging to be tagged in…and the Game obliges!

DD: HAHA! Pay attention, Rodney! This is how you really break some neck!

VJ: What the hell are you talking about?! Sniper…he just slapped Chyna! Panther is trying to get at Sniper but Krazed is holding him back…

DD: OLD SCHOOL!!!!!!

VJ: We've got triple teaming on HBK!!!!!!! Triple H, Firestorm and Sniper are mugging Michaels behind Krazed's back!

DD: Jackass! Forget what I said about Krazed! Bitch is too stupid to be biased!

VJ: Shawn is getting mugged…Panther and Chyna have Krazed distracted inadvertendly…c'mon guys! Get outta there!

DD: They're all idiots!

VJ: Krazed finally turns around…he missed the whole thing! Sniper picks Michaels up…SNIPER DRIVER!!!! 1…2…HBK gets the shoulder up!!!! You've gotta hand it to Michaels for kicking out of that one! OH! Sniper with a hard boot to the face! There's another one! Sniper is headed to the top rope…

DD: Here we go, Vinny! Are you ready, baby???!

VJ: SENECAN BOMB!!!!!! Dead center!!! He hooks him…1…2…Chyna in there to break the count up!!! Krazed…Krazed trying to get her outt…Turn around!!!!! Krazed!

DD: Shut up before I have to silence your ass!

VJ: Firestorm just ran into the ring and once again Shawn Michaels is being mugged!! Damn it!!!!

DD: HAHA! This is better than Syracuse!

VJ: Krazed turns around and sees Firestorm in the ring…there was no tag Krazed!

DD: Damn this match is old school!

VJ: (Laughs) Actually now that ya mention it…Krazed is asking the fans whether or not there was a tag!

DD: Don't listen to those piss drinking punks! Half the fans in the crowd are drunk, the other half are too busy screwing Momma Johnson to pay attention to the match!

VJ: You…would you leave my momma out of this?!

DD: Only if you can leave those guys out of your momma!

VJ: (Sighs) Firestorm…he picks up HBK…he drives him back to the buckle hard!!! He has that big boot of his…he just drove it right up under the throat of Shawn! We've…wait a minute! Look in the aisle!!!

DD: huh…hey!! It's Joey's thugs!!!!

VJ: Wait a damn minute! Joey Merlino's cronies are headed out here…those are the same guys we saw last night…they just yanked Panther and Chyna off the apron…DAMN IT!!!!

DD: HEHEHEHEHE!!!!! PAYBACKS…ARE…A…BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAATCH!!!!

VJ: Panther and Chyna…damn it!!! These thugs are beating the hell out of them on the floor! 1 of those guys has Panther…OH NO!!!!! he just darted him headfirst into the ringpost!!!!! Chyna hard into the ring stairs!!! This…damn it!!

DD: Can you feel it, Vinny?! It's just a matter of time now before Panther and Shawn Michaels are history!!

VJ: Thanks to that damn Merlino!

DD: Nah, bitch! Thanks to the strongest force in the history of the world today, Sniper and Firestorm! And Hunter!!!

VJ: This is disgusting! Panther and Chyna have been knocked out cold on the floor…Krazed just saw what went down on the outside and he's checking on the pair…look in the ring! Michaels just ran right into the big hand of Firestorm…BIG TIME!!! BIG TIME ON SHAWN! Cover…

DD: Krazed, get back in the ring and count, crackdome!!!!

VJ: Kraze.."crackdome"?! Krazed is out there to get Merlino's damn thugs away from Panther and Chyna…oh! Oh no!!

DD: Yes!! Get him!

VJ: Firestorm just dragged Krazed into the ring by his hair…KRAZED JUST SHOVED THE PREZ!!!!

DD: OH! Big mistake, jerkface!

VJ: Prez just shoved Krazed back! The tension…it's in the air! It's gonna explode…OH!!!!! KRAZED AND FIRESTORM!!! KRAZED AND FIRESTORM!!! THEY ARE GOING AT IT!!!!

DD: What the hell is wrong with this guy?! Somebody get that…YEAH!!!

VJ: OH!!!! Triple H just ran into the ring and decked Krazed with a clothesline…Sniper has him now…oh no! Look out…SNIPER BOMB!!!!!!!! Krazed has been drilled with the Sniper Bomb!

DD: That's what I'm talking bout hooooooo!

VJ: (Looking at Dave like he's a fool) Damn it! You really need to leave that stuff alone! The referee has just been…oh! Firestorm that's enough!

DD: Nah! Krazed wanted to start a fight! He started one with the wrong person!!!

VJ: Firestorm just dragged Krazed to the floor! He just shoved our Mexican commentator Pablo away from the Portuguese Announce table! Firestorm has Krazed now…this isn't right! This isn't…c'mon no!! BIG TIME THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE ON KRAZED!!!!!!!!

DD: TESTIFY!!!!!!!!

VJ: Krazed…the special guest referee for this match has bee--SWEET CHIN MUSIC!!!! Michaels hit it on Helmsley!!! He hit it…He makes the cover…Sniper into the ring with a hard elbow to the back of the head of Michaels!!! Oh! Sniper…Sniper has lost it! He's hammering away with hard right hands to the head of Michaels! He just got up and told Hunter to finish him!

DD: And that's exactly what’s gonna happen…OH!!! Sniper got Panther!

VJ: Aww c'mon! Sniper just went to the floor…he slams Panther's head into the steel stairs! Chyna…she's desparately trying to help Panther, Sniper just kicked her in the head!

DD: This is it! This is the end! The end of Michaels! The end of Chyna! The end of Panther! Long live the Firestorm era!

VJ: Triple H has Shawn hooked in the ring…here it comes! The Pedigree…OH!

DD: CHEATER!!!

VJ: Michaels with a low blow!!! Shawn…he's still got fight in him! Double leg takedown on Helmsley…slingshot sends him flying right into Firestorm!!!!!!! Firestorm and Triple H are down…here comes Sniper…HURACANRANA!!!!!! Michaels with a huracanran on Sniper!!!!! Michaels…he hooks the legs…

DD: No ref! Damn ass Texan…hey wait a minute!

VJ: It's Trish! Trish…she's in the ring…1…2…OH!!!! Rebecca just attacked Trish from behind!!!!

DD: What a woman!!!!!

VJ: Rebecca…she's assaulting Trish…

DD: Oh no! Look out for Steph!!

VJ: Stephanie McMahon is in the ring…she's got her boot off…Rebecca doesn't see her…OH!!!!!! Boot to the head of Rebecca!

DD: You backfighting hussies…STRIP HER!!!!!!!!!!! BRA AND PANTIES!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

VJ: Stephanie and Trish are stripping Rebecca!!!! This crowd is going--will you get off the table! Put your money away! OH!!!! Damn it!!!!

DD: Hunter, ya damn wifebeater…I mean good job!

VJ: Triple H just ran in and hit his wife with a right hand! He's got Trish now! No! Not the pedigree…no!!!! HBK just rolled him up!!

DD: TIGHTS!! HE HAS THE TIGHTS!!!!

VJ: Trish with the count…1…2…Sniper with a boot to the head of Michaels!! Aww my gosh!!!! This match is out of control!! Michaels is fighting to survive and now he's crawling over to his corner to make the tag…

DD: Umm…notice something missing Shawn?!

VJ: Oh no! Shawn just realized what happened to Panther and Chyna! Look at that look on his face…Sniper has HBK by the tights…belly to back…NO! Michaels counters and lands on his feet…he sends Sniper into the ropes…flying clothesline…HBK JUST NIPPED UP!!!!! How did he do it?!

DD: It's that damn Viagra!!!!!! I damn Bob Dole to hell!!!!

VJ: Shawn Michaels…sudden burst of energy…Sniper is back up and he walks into a right hand!!!! Triple H catches one as well! Firestorm is in the ring and now HBK hops to the top…quick as a cat…MOONSAULT!!! Trish with the count…

DD: He's not legal!!!!!

VJ: Actually yes he is…skankhole! 1…2…kickout by Firestorm! Michaels…he's having to fight a whole army! He picks up Sniper…SLAM!!!!! Shawn Michaels with a slam and now he's headed to the top rope…FLYING ELBOW RIGHT INTO THE HEART OF SNIPER!!!!! Michaels…I can feel it!!

DD: Damn it no!

VJ: Michaels is loading it up! Here comes Sweet Chin Music!

DD: No no no no no!!!!

VJ: Michaels to the corner…the band is tuning up!! It looks like Sniper or Firestorm is gonna be the target…

DD: HAHA! Look!

VJ: Oh no! Rebecca is back up and she's choking Trish! This isn't right…OHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! SWEET CHIN MUSIC ON REBECCA!!!!!!!

DD: WIFE KICKER!!!!!

VJ: Michaels just superkicked his own wife…OH!!!! Firestorm with a low blow…Triple H back up with a boot to the midsection…PEDIGREE!!!!!! HBK has been planted!!!!

DD: That's it!!! Vince, get out the trumpet and start playing "Taps", cuz Panther and the gang are gone!! They're done!!!

VJ: Trish is down after the chokehold…Firestorm, Triple H and Sniper are celebrating a bit prematurely…Krazed is in the ring!!!!! Krazed is in the ring with a chair…

DD: Look out gang…NOOOO!

VJ: He just bashed Firestorm's brains in with that chairshot!!!! Triple H and Sniper both turn to Krazed but they're caught…DOUBLE CHOKESLAM!!!!!!!!!!

DD: What the hell kinda ref is this man?!

VJ: He just took out Sniper and the Game…Firestorm is dazed from that chairshot…Krazed has him hooked…SUPERNOVA ON THE CHAIR!!!!! Krazed has just taken out Firestorm…OH! He's not done! Krazed is battering Firestorm all around the ring…he just kicked the Prez to the floor…Panther is climbing back up to the ring apron!

DD: Oh no!!!! Damn it!!!!!

VJ: Michaels is still out of it after the Pedigree…he's trying to crawl over to make the tag…

DD: Get Krazed off of the Prez!!!

VJ: Krazed and Prez Firestorm…they're brawling on the floor! Trish was choked out by Rebecca…wait! Here comes referee Al Gore!!!

DD: Oh no! We'd be better off with that Viagra consuming bastard Gore!

VJ: Gore just hit the ring…he's trying to straighten out the situation on the floor…Michaels is getting closer and closer to his corner! He's trying to make the tag to Panther! Will he make!

DD: Somebody get that idiot!!!! Yes!!!

VJ: Oh…Sniper and Triple H both grab HBK's leg to prevent the tag…OH!!!!!! HE MADE THE TAG!!! PANTHER IS BACK IN!!!!

DD: Damn IT!!!!!

VJ: Look at that look on Panther's face! He is pissed!!! Right hand sends Sniper down!! Helmsley tries for a clothesline but Panther caught him…T-BONE!!!!!!!! T-bone suplex dumped him right on his head!!!!!! Panther has Sniper back up…Irish whip sends Sniper into the ropes…Panther misses with a clothesline…Sniper tries for a superkick…it's caught!!!! Panther…he spins Sniper around--PANTHER CUTTER!!!!!!!!!

DD: NOOOOO!!!!!! Get up!!!!

VJ: Sniper has been KO'd with a Panther Cutter!!!! Panther is waiting on the Game…boot to the stomach…PANTHER CUTTER!!!!!!! Triple H has been floored too and Panther is headed to the top rope!

DD: this guy is an idiot Vince!! Look out!!!

VJ: CORKSCREW PLANCHA!!!!!!!! He just took out Krazed and Prez Firestorm on the floor!!!! Panther…geez!!!!!! He's all over Firestorm with right hands to the head! He has a chair now!!!! Wait Panther…calm down!!! If he uses that chair he'll be DQ'd! And that means that he, Chyna and Michaels will be gone for good!!!

DD: Well I never thought I'd say this but I'd love to see Panther bash Sniper's brains in with that chair!!

VJ: Panther is headed into the ring with that chair! Referee Gore is trying to get that chair away from Panther…Panther just tagged Michaels in!!!!

DD: HA! HBK was sitting out on the apron and Panther just tagged him on the shoulder.

VJ: Uh…I can't explain that. HBK…he just took a beating in there for damn near 10 minutes and Panther tags him back in. HBK is waiting for Sniper to get back up…we may be fixing to see…OHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! PANTHER!!!!!! PANTHER WITH A CHAIRSHOT ON MICHAELS!!!!!! PANTHER JUST BLASTED SHAWN MICHAELS WITH THAT STEEL CHAIR!!!!!! WHAT IN THE HELL WAS THAT????????!!!!!!

DD: HAHAHA!!!! Panther has FINALLY seen the light!!!

VJ: What the hell just happened in there?! Panther just bashed Michaels with that chairshot…I think he just got DQ'd! I think Panther just got DQ'd! That means that he, Chyna and Michaels are gone! What the hell…

DD and VJ: WHAT????!

DD: NOOO!

VJ: This…this doesn't make sense at all! Look at the look on Firestorm's face! What's the deal!

DD: I get it! Panther hit Michaels…so Michaels wins by DQ…and since Panther and Michaels are on the same team Panther wins by DQ…wait a minute! That's bullsh*t!! What the f*ck is going on???!

VJ: I don't think anybody in this arena knows what's going on! Panther has a mic!

Panther: (Laughing) HBK…(laughs) if I said it once…I've said it a thousand times! You should NEVER…EVER…ever ever ever ever ever ever ever…trust Panther. Now I know that all of my loving, caring and adoring fans out there are confused right?! Well what I want you all to do is listen up and listen good! What you just saw was P-Diddyt killing 2 birds with the same stone! Your winners, as a result of a DQ, HBK, Chyna and P-Diddy! Your losers, Firestorm, Triple H and Sniper…therefore…(clears throat) once again THE OWNER of the NFWA…P-Diddy!!!!!!!!! (Mixed reaction from the crowd)

DD: that is the biggest sack of Yak sh*t I've ever seen!

VJ: Firestorm is livid…Sniper is livid!!! I think even Chyna is mad about that one! Panther has apparently backstabbed his friend and mentor in order to regain control!!!

Panther: Now Snip, Firestorm, Trip…all of you are sitting in the ring with that dumb ass look on your faces cuz you just got played by Panther and…well… I've just got 2 words for each and every last one of you…F*CK YOU!!!!!!!! I'm out!

VJ: I…I can't believe it. I don't even know what to say…

DD: I think Firestorm and the gang know! They're gonna head back there and beat Panther's punk ass!!!!!

VJ: Panther has just screwed everybody in this match! I still can't understand this…oh well! The World Title match is next! It's Lightning and Big Foot! Demolition Death Match! Ice Cube is the special guest ref! Perhaps the most intense World Title Match in the history of the NFWA. Once again, lets' show you how this match came about!

RS: Folks I'm back here with…

Lightning: Hey Panther…what the hell was that???!

Panther: It's called payback!

Lightning: Panther…if you screw me out of the title tonight…

Panther: What?!

Lightning: I will kill you if you get involved in my match tonight! It's bad enough I have to deal with Ice Cube…

Panther: Is that any way to talk to your GX buddy?! Look, why don't you and Big Foot just go out there, wrestle your little match and leave me the hell alone? Ok!

Lightning: I'm warning you! (Walks towards the entrance)

Squirrel: Aight Joey! I know you're in there!

DD: Oh no!!!

VJ: We saw Merlino get into that hummer earlier tonight and now there's no place to run! Squirrel has Merlino trapped…wait!!!! Those thugs again!! Those thugs have just hopped out of the hummer and attacked Squirrel!!!

DD: HAHA! No good bastard! Get him!

VJ: OH!!!!! 1 of those thugs just hit Squirrel in the ribs with that sledgehammer!! Again!!!! They have Squirrel by the hair…

DD: Look at this…HAHA!

VJ: They just tossed him through the windshield of that other limo!!!! Squirrel has been taken apart by Merlino's henchmen!!!!!

DD: Finally some justice here tonight!

VJ: C'mon! Calm down! You've got…

Ice Cube: Rage gets a title shot on FNS?! It was supposed to be my shot! This is bullsh*t and you know it!!

VJ: Hey! I didn't sign the match damn it! If you've got a problem, you take it up with Kurt Angle or Maria! You leave me the hell alone!

Ice Cube: Watch your ass!

DD: He told you, didn't he?!

DD: Here we go!

VJ: This is gonna be big! It's 2 cousins…2 family member brought together here tonight by that World Title belt! Lightning's held it before…will he be able to hold it again!

DD: And look at Ice Cube! Doesn't he look great in stripes?!

VJ: Uh…whatever. I just hope he can call this down the middle…there you see on the floor weapons surrounding the ring…there's the tie up!!!! We've got Lightning and Big Foot in the center of…WHOA!!!!!! Did you see that Dave?!? What a display of power by Big Foot!!!!!

DD: HAHAHA! He just threw old Bolt Breath across the ring like he was nothing! HA…what the?!

VJ: Ice Cube is complaining of a hair pull…why he's doing that in a no DQ match is beyond me…HEY WAIT!!!!! He just grabbed Big Foot by the hair and shoved him to the mat!!!!! Big Foot is back up…

DD: Careful! He's the ref!!!

VJ: No DQ…OH!!!!! Lightning with a clothesline just floored the Champ! Lightning now…he's all over Big Foot with boots to the head…Cube has Lightning by the hair and he does the same thing!!!!! Damn it!

DD: HA! See…Krazed and Trish can learn from Ice Cube! He's great!

VJ: Lightning and Big Foot both look pissed…hey wait!

DD: Uh oh! You may have made a mistake Ice Cube!

VJ: Lightning and Big Foot…they're ganging up on Ice Cube!!! Oh my…

VJ: Oh no! Now what?!

DD: What's he doing out here?!

VJ: Panther…he is once again in control of the NFWA…what in the world is he gonna do now!

DD: You remember what he said earlier! Panther can't be trusted!

Panther: Now…(stong boos from one section of the crowd) I feel the love! Thank you! Now…Ice Cube!!! My buddy! Uh…I know you were watching the Control Match a little while ago and…well…I guess you know that I'm running this sh*t once again. That means that I can do what I want, I can hire who I want, fire who I want and…well, me and Chyna were sitting in the back watching the match and…well…something just wasn't right about this match! I mean…the biggest PPV of the year…one of the biggest World Title matches of all time…weapons...falls count anywhere. With everything that this match has, it's missing 1 thing…and that's 1 special stip.

DD: What's he getting at?!

Panther: Now…we've got No DQ already…this is already a Demolition Death Match…you're the special guest ref and you've got a guaranteed title shot…wait! I've got it! Ice Cube…if you do anything…ANYTHING…fast counts, Ice Breakers, ANYTHING to effect the outcome of this match then I guarantee that you will NEVER receive another Title Shot in the NFWA again!!! (Crowd goes crazy) Oh…and when I say title shot I don't mean the World Title, I mean any belt in the fed! I-C, Toughman, Women's, you interfere, you will never get a shot at a Title in the NFWA again!!!! Y'all have a nice match now!

VJ: OH!!!! That's a big ruling!

DD: That damn Panther!!!!!!! Where the hell is Firestorm?!

VJ: Ice Cube…Ice Cube is pissed off!!!! Big Foot is smiling…Lightning from behind…GERMAN SUPLEX!!!!!!! Ice Cube with the count…1…2…kickout by Big Foot! Ice Cube…you can see it in his eyes! He does not wanna call this match down the middle! He wanted to ruin the Title match, and now thanks to Panther he can't!

DD: Where is Sniper?! Somebody's gotta do something about this?! Panther needs to be hanged! Get me a damn noose!

VJ: Sit down! Big Foot is back up after the suplex…OH!!!!! He popped Lightning right in the mouth! Big Foot just nailed Lightning with a hard right hand…LIGHTNING FIRES BACK!!!

DD: Uh oh! It's gonna get dirty now!

VJ: Lightning and Big Foot…the intensity is picking up…WE'VE GOT A FIGHT ON OUR HANDS!!!! Lightning and Big Foot are slugging it out in the center of the ring…uh oh! Big Foot is gaining the upper hand!! He hits off the ropes…here comes a big boot…whoa!!!! Lightning ducked and Big Foot crotched himself on the top rope…

DD: OH!!! I guess we won't have any little foots walking around, huh?! OOOH!

VJ: Lightning off the ropes with a big boot of his own sends his cousin crashing over the top to the floor!!!! Lightning is in control of the bout, and he shoots a smile to Ice Cube! Ice Cube…I've never seen him this angry!

DD: Why is Panther still out here?!

VJ: I dunno! Lightning goes to the floor…he just pulled out a cookie sheet…

DD: OH! That's not a cookie sheet! That's a bed of nails!!!!!

VJ: Oh my! That's dangerous!!! Lightning has a bed of nails out on the floor and he's walking towards his cousin! Big Foot is down and out on the floor! He doesn't even see Lightning coming!

DD: Vince, we're about to have a new Champion…OH!!!!!!

VJ: Big Foot was playing possum!!! He just nailed Lightning right in the ribs with a 2X4 wrapped in barbwire!!!!! Big Foot…

DD: Well I'll be! He's not as dumb as he looks!

VJ: Big Foot has Lightning by the hair now…he scoops him up…OH!!!!!!! He just slammed Lightning down on the bed of nails!!!! Lightning…my God!!!! Big Foot…big legdrop on the bed!!! Lightning is down and he is hurt!!!! Big Foot…

DD: Aww that's uncalled for! You hear what he said about Ice Cube's momma?!

VJ: He told him to count! 1…2…kickout by Lightning! How in the hell…oh no! Look at the blood pouring out of the back of Lightning!!! Big Foot…he's smiling! He has Lightning by the hair…Irish whip sends the challenger hard into the guardrail!!! Backfirst! Lightning's back has to be killing him and look at Big Foot! He has that barbwire board again…OH!!!!!! He's tearing the skin off of Lightning's back! This is brutally violent!!!! Big Foot has Lightning by the hair again…this time he sends him facefirst into the stairs!!! Big Foot…

DD: I've never seen this side of Big Foot before…I like it!!

VJ: Uh oh!!! We've got tables coming into play now! Big Foot is getting a table from the aisle and he's setting it up!!

DD: Haha! Lightning is about to get…WOOOOOOOD!!!!!

VJ: We may see the end of Lightning very shortly!!!!!!! Big Foot has set up a table and now he's got a gas can!!!!

DD: Ohh! I'm loving this guy more and more!!

VJ: Big Foot is pouring gas all over the table…he's right in front of Panther…wait!!! Watch Lightning!

DD: Turn around Big Foot…NOOOO!!!!! Big Dummy!

VJ: Lightning with a hard clothesline just took Big Foot and the table down!!!!! Gasoline is everywhere!!! My God!!! Lightning just picked up a chair from the aisle!!!

DD: Well…Big Foot couldn't give wood, but he's gonna get STEEEEEL!!!! HAHAHA!

VJ: BOOOM!!! Lightning with the damndest chairshot to the head of the Champion!!!! He just caved his skull in! Lightning makes the cover…Ice Cube a little out of position…1…2…kickout!!!! Lightning…whoa! He's up in Ice Cube's face about the count!!!

DD: You see, this damn Lightning is a snake! I bet he wants to try and get Ice Cube to hit him just so that he can screw him out of his title shot!!!!

VJ: Lightning and Cube are exchanging heated words…Ice Cube's gonna hit him…NO! Panther's in there…

DD: That damn idiot!

VJ: Panther is in Ice Cube's face to remind him of the stip! Ice Cube…

DD: He needs to just haul off and kick Panther in the nuts! Hard too!

VJ: Lightning has Big Foot now…clothesline sends the big man right into the front row!!! Lightning and Big Foot are going at it in the crowd! They're trading blows back and forth…

DD: Nah! It looks like Lightning's the one doing all of the blowing…I mean punching! You know what the hell I meant!

VJ: I sure hope so! Lightning is firmly in control of the match…Irish whip…OH! Big Foot hard into the guardrail now! Lightning just…he's buying ice cream!

DD: See…he's provoking Cube again!

VJ: How!

DD: He won't share!

VJ: Lightning is buying…no! He just stole the entire tray of ice cream!

DD: Greedy bastard!

VJ: He's headed over to Big Foot now…OH!!!!!! He just tatooed him with the ice cream tray and sends the champion staggering back over the guardrail! He's over by the set now and here comes Lightning! Lightning has a wire…he's strangling Big Foot with it!!!! Lightning…he's choking out his own cousin! C'mon Ice Cube! Panther! One of you get in there!

DD: this is no DQ!

VJ: I know…but Big Foot's face is turning blue! Ice Cube is over there now and he's asking Big Foot whether or not he gives in…Big Foot has that ice cream carrier….OH!!!!! He hit Lightning right in the dome!!!!!! He may have just knocked Lightning out!!!!! Big Foot with a cover…1…2…Lightning got the shoulder up!!!!! Big Foot…man! What a fight!

DD: I knew it would be good! I didn't think it'd be this good!

VJ: Big Foot…he looks pissed off now! He has his cousin by the hair…what's he gonna…OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD!!!!!!!!

DD: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!

VJ: SWEET BABY JESUS!!!!! BIG FOOT JUST TOSSED LIGHTNING THROUGH THE FIRETRON!!!!!!!! Or is it the Panthertron now…well whatever you wanna call it, Big Foot just launched the challenger right through that big screen!!!!! There was glass covering that thing…Lightning may have been sliced to pieces!

DD: He's dead, Vince! That's it!! Finally we have something to be happy about at this no good PPV!

VJ: Lightnin…oh God! Big Foot just reached into what's left of the Panthertron…what the…

DD: NOO!

VJ: Lightning…he just sprayed Big Foot right in the eyes with a fire extinguisher!!!! Lightning…he's still in this one…

DD: But he's busted wide open!!!

VJ: Lightning steps out of the Tron now…he charges in at Big Foot but he's caught!! Big Foot is caught…OHHHHHHH!!!! CHOKESLAM THROUGH THE TECHNICIAN TABLE!!!!!!! Lightning could've been electricuted by that…he has to be done after that one…cover…Ice Cube with the count…1…2…kickout!!!!!! Damn it…Lightning will not quit!!!!!

DD: Well Big Foot is gonna beat him to death!!!

VJ: I don't think he can believe it! Big Foot just grabbed Lightning by the hair…they're headed back down here!

DD: If they come over here I'm gone!

VJ: Big Foot…he just tossed Lightning into the ring! This match finally back into the ring, Ice Cube's there too and…where's Big Foot going?!

DD: I don't know…oh my! He's got that table again!

VJ: The very same table he drenched in gasoline earlier in the match! Big Foot…he just grabbed a ladder from the aisle and he tosses that into the ring!!!! This match…this match is getting out of control fast!!!

DD: I can smell it! This is gonna be it for Lightning! Whatever he does!

VJ: Big Foot…he has the table set up in the ring…he's setting a ladder right next to that table and he's got those matches again!!!! Big Foot…he's got those matches…Lightning with a low blow!!!!

DD: What a cheap shot! Ice Cube…damn it! No DQ!

VJ: Lightning has those matches now…he just lit…WHOA!!!! I think he got burn…OH!!!! THE TABLE IS ON FIRE! THE LADDER IS TOO!!!! Big Foot has been burned as well! We've got flames everywhere!!!

DD: I'm about to get outta here, Vince!

VJ: Lightning everything just went up in flames…Big Foot is writhing in pain…Lightning scoops him up…WHAT STRENGTH…HE SLAMMED HIM THROUGH THE FLAMING TABLE!!!!!! Oh my God! That could be all…no! Lightning isn't going for the cover!!!!

DD: He's an idiot…he needs to get out of there before the ring explodes or something!

VJ: Lightning is hammering away with right hands to the head of Big Foot…now what the hell…?! Lightning is going to the top rope!

DD: He's gone crazy!

VJ: Lightning…he just climbed to the top…that ladder is on fire!!!!! Lightning just grabbed a hold of that flaming ladder…oh no!! OH!!!!

DD: Look out Cube!!!!!

VJ: Lightning just rode that flaming ladder down into the chest of Big Foot!!!! Lightning is crazy!!!!!! Lightning has lost it…he just told Panther to toss him that chair…and Panther gives it to him!

DD: Pussy!

VJ: Stop it…OH!!!! Lightning just pounded that ladder with the chair!! Big Foot is underneath that ladder…Lightning has snapped! Lightning is pounding him like a railroad spike!!!

DD: HAHA! This is brutal! I love this!

VJ: Lightning is trying to destroy his cousin it looks like!! He picks him up by the hair…Lightning off the ropes and drives him into the steel chair with a bulldog! Cover…1…2…kickout!! I must say Ice Cube is calling this one down the middle!

DD: Only cuz of that damn Panther!!

VJ: Panther still on the floor watching on…and Lightning's out there too. He's looking under the ring for…what the hell is that?! Lightning just pulled out a big black thing…

DD: Looks like an over grown roach motel…uh oh.

VJ: Oh no! Tell me that's not what I think it is!

DD: C4!!!!!!!!

VJ: Oh my God! This is out of hand!! Ice Cube may have to stop this one! Lightning is gonna try and kill Big Foot! Wait…Big Foot is back up!!!

DD: Look out Sparky…AHH!

VJ: Big Foot has Lightning by the hair…he's dragging him back into the ring…Lightning is hammering away with right hands to the head of Big Foot...rake at the eyes breaks his grip!!!! Lightning…he's headed to the top rope now!! Lightning is climbing to the top…OH NO!!!! Big Foot shakes the top rope and Lightning has a tender landing!!

DD: HAHA! C'Mon Big Foot! This is your time to silence the World! What the f*ck are you doing?!

VJ: Big Foot is climbing the ropes with Lightning…Ice Cube…he's leaning on the ropes to get a better look at this one…I don't think he's doing it purposely but he's making it harder for Big Foot to climb the ro..OH NO! Big Foot slipped…wait a minute…oh my…

DD and VJ: HOLY SH*T!!!!!!!!!!!!!

VJ: Both men just fell on top of that C4 explosive!!!! Both men are done!!!!! They're done!!!!!

DD: They've been blown to kingdome come, Vince!

VJ: Ice Cube…man…Lightning took the brunt of that! All 400 lbs. of Big Foot came crashing down onto him and they both landed on the bomb! Ice Cube is putting a count down now…1…2…3…4…5…6…Big Foot is moving at 6!!!! Big Foot…he's crawling over to Lightning! Can he make the cover…

DD: C'mon! You make the pin and you're a legend Big Foot! Let's go!

VJ: Big Foot throws his arm on top…1…2…LIGHTNING GOT THE SHOULDER UP!!!!!

DD; DAMN IT!!!!!

VJ: What a match!!!! This one is crazy!!!!!! Big Foot…he's slowly getting back to his feet..Lightning is covered in blood! I've never seen this much blood in my life!!! Big Foot is busted as well! He has Lightning by the hair and tosses him back into the ring! Here he comes now! Big Foot is signalling for the end of this one! He may be going for the Demolition Bomb!

DD: Say bye bye Lightning!

VJ: Galant effort on the part of Lightning…here it comes…there's the gut wrench…wait!!!! Big Foot couldn't lift him!!!

DD: huh?!

VJ: Big Foot just passed out…no!! Big Foot…he's dazed from the punishment that's been inflicted in this match…!

DD: C'mon! Just get up! Lightning is done!!! Get up!!!!

VJ: Dave has become a real Big Foot fan in this one!

DD: If he beats Lightning he's my hero!

VJ: Big Foot is getting up…he's trying to shake out the cobwebs! He has Lightning by the hair…OH! Lightning still has fight in him! A right hand tags the jaw of Big Foot…the Champion has been blinded!

DD: (Pulls out his gun) Here Big Foot! Use it if you need it…LOOK OUT!!!!

VJ: Lightning with a boot to the stomach…LIGHTNING BOLT!!!!!!! He just hit it!!! He drilled Big Foot!!!! There's the cover…Ice Cube with the count…1…2…3!!!!!!! We have a new Champion!!!

DD: NOOOOOO!!!!

VJ: Lightning…he has done it!!!!! Lightning is for the 2^nd time the NFWA World Champion!!!!! What a bloody encounter, and Ice Cube called it right down the middle!!!! But Dave, you've gotta hand it to Big Foot!

DD: I don't have to hand him sh*t! He blew it!!! He had the match in the palm of his hands! He sucks!!!!!

VJ: What…nevermind! Ice Cube has the World Title…he's gonna present it to Lightning?! I can't believe it! What a display of sportsmanship…WAIT A GODDAMN MINUTE!!!!!!!!! HE JUST HIT LIGHTNING WITH THE BELT!!!!!

DD: HAHA! How ya like him now, Panther! Match is over! He can do anything he wants!

VJ: Ice Cube is all over the World Champion…this is disgusting!!!!! Panther…watch him! Panther just grabbed a chair and he's headed into the ring…BOOOM!!!! PANTHER WITH A CHAIRSHOT JUST NAILED ICE CUBE!!!!!!! ICE CUBE IS DOWN!!!! Panther has him by the hair…he tosses him to the outside!!!!!! Panther has come to the aid of his GX…uh oh!

DD: Look Vinny! It's the REAL PREZ!!!

VJ: Firestorm…I don't know what he is now but he doesn't look happy! He's obviously out here to get Panther…Firestorm slides into the ring…OH!!!! Panther tried for a chairshot but Firestorm blocks it…Panther with a right hand to the head…Firestorm nails Panther with a right hand!!!! Panther and Firestorm are going at it…

DD: HAHA! Look!! Payback!

VJ: It's Merlino!! Merlino just grabbed Chyna and slams her into the wall!!!! Those thugs…they're holding Chyna now…where are they taking her?! What are they doing to Chyna?!

DD: Bitch had no reason being back there!

VJ: Back out here, we've got Firestorm and Panther brawling in the ring…Lightning is trying to pull himself back up…look out by the entrance!! It's Merlino and those guys with Chyna!!! Panther just looked up and sees what's going on…Firestorm has Panther in a full nelson now!!!

Joey: (With a mic) HAHAHAHA! GO GET EM!!!!!!!

DD: What the hell is he talking about?!

DD: Vince…it can't be!!!!!!

VJ: Is this….is The Man?! Is this who I think it is?!

VJ and DD: IT'S CRAZY LOU!!!!!!!! CRAZY LOU IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!! CRAZY LOU!!!!! OH MY GOD LISTEN TO THIS CROWD!!!!!!!!!!!

DD: The Man is back Vinny!!!!!

VJ: Lou slides into the ring with that ball bat…Firestorm is holding Panther…OH!!!!!! Lou with that bat right to the ribs of Panther!!!! Lou…Lou is all over Panther with that baseball bat!!!! Firestorm and Lou are double teaming Panther…this must be payback from what happened last summer!!!!!!

DD: And you know Paybacks are a bitch!!! HAHAHA! I love it!!!!

VJ: Lou has Panther now…PENN TOSS!!!!! PENN TOSS ON PANTHER!!!!! Firestorm has Lightning…BIG TIME ON LIGHTNING!!!!!! GX is being destroyed in the ring…it's Squirrel! Squirrel is on his way out…

DD: Get that idiot!!!!

VJ: Merlino has that mic…OH!!!!!! He runs down the aisle and nails him in the back of the head with that mic!!!! Squirrel is down…Merlino just tossed Lou that sledgehammer…Panther is trying to get back up….OH!!!!! Lou with a shot right to the head!!!!! And there's on to Lightning!!!!!!! Lou…Firestorm just raised Lou's hand!!! What is the meaning of this?! Is Crazy Lou in cahoots with Firestorm?! Ladies and gentlemen…so long from East Rutherford!!!!!