Head: …

KT: That's true. Nobody likes him. Jaguar is hammering the Rock to the back of the head…the Undertaker grabs him by the throat and tosses him to the buckle…OH GOD!!!! Rights and lefts right to the midsection of Jaguar! Undertaker with a thrust chop to the throat! That had to hurt!

DD: Let me thrust you and the throat and you'll see exactly how it feels!

KT: Undertaker is climbing to the top rope…he signals for the end. Jaguar is back up…Oh! He pulled the Rock in the way of an Undertaker flying clothesline from the top! Jag clips the knee of the Undertaker! He's stomping away on the knee of the Undertaker and…wait a minute…look in the aisle. That's Trish Stratus!!!

Head:…

DD: Yeah, you damn right Head. She looks real good!

KT: Well no matter how she looks she's obviously up to no good! Jaguar picks the Phenom up…oh! He just slapped the goozle around the throat of Jag…Trish is on the ring apron and Jaguar hits a low blow! That dirty bitch! He just threw the Undertaker down and now what's he doing? He's going for that duffel bag that he brought to the ring…what's in there?! The Rock attacks Jaguar from behind! The Rock backs him to the corner where he is laying the Smacketh Down on his Candy Ass!!!!!

DD: Look out Trish!

KT: The Rock hit Trish!!!! The Rock just caught Trish Stratus right in the mouth with a right hand! Jaguar didn't like that at all and he charges at the Rock…Rock with a spinebuster!

DD: Oh no! You know what's coming up now!!!

KT: This whole crowd knows what's coming up now! It's the most electrifying move in Sports Entertainment…the People's Elbow! The Rock hits off one side…he's going--OH MY GOD!!!!! What in the World?! Trish Stratus just shot the Rock in the face with that flamethrower! The Rock has been burned to a crisp by Trish!

DD: Ha! She just burned the Brahma Bull! Hey, we might as well just call the Rock a big steak cuz he is well done!

KT: That bitch! Low blow by Jaguar. He picks up the Rock but he's asking Trish for something…oh she's pulling a table out from underneath the ring…she's setting it up and now Jaguar has the Rock! No…he wouldn't?! Don't do it Jaguar!!!! NOOO!!! Jackknife over the top rope through that table! He may have broken him in half! The Rock isn't moving but the Undertaker is back into the ring…Trish just pulled the ref to the floor. The Undertaker has Jaguar by the throat…he picks him up for a chokeslam…wow! What a move! Jaguar managed to escape and he dropkicks the Undertaker's knee. He's going for that bag again…my God he's got a sledgehammer! Oh!!!! He hit the Undertaker right in the knee! The ref just turned around and Jag makes the cover…1…2…3!!! Damn it!

KT: And Trish is in the ring and she just gave Jaguar a big hug. The mysterious masked man gets a big win here tonight and he may have put the Rock and the Taker on the injured list as well. Wait…Jaguar has that sledgehammer again…he's gonna bash the knee again! No…Trish was able to talk him out of it. Well she may be a bitch, but at least she has a heart. Trish Stratus is…looking for something underneath the ring?

DD: Maybe Head should help her look. Stop smiling you goof, she doesn't like you!

KT: Stop talking to the mannequin head jackass! What the…Trish has a jackhammer!!!! She just pulled out a jackhammer from underneath the ring?! What the hell is that doing under there?! She just handed it to Jaguar and he's putting it on the Undertaker's knee…no!!! No!!!! No!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! He just took that Jackhammer to the Undertaker's knee!!! That lousy son of a bitch! Officials are coming out here to get Jaguar out of here.

DD: Well that answers any questions about the Dynasty, they're still alive and well!

KT: Oh I'm not so sure about that. Where is Sniper? Why didn't he arrive with Panther or why didn't Panther arrive with Jaguar? Hopefully we will get some answers tonight on FNS!

KT: Welcome back to FNS and during the break, the Rock and the Undertaker were carried out of the arena after taking a tremendous beating at the hands of Jaguar. The Rock was burned by Trish Stratus and then may have had his neck snapped with a powerbomb through a table. And as for the Undertaker…his knee may have been shattered completely. This is horrible.

Head:…

DD: Yeah, Rocky Sucks. That was gay what he said about you on SmackDown last night.

KT: SmackDown?!!!!!

Kurt: Look, I don't care what happened at the PPV, cuz we don't need that title to tell us we're great. I have 2 gold medals!

Downcast: Yeah…and I've got three ladies.

Shyanne: Sorry.

Sniper: Watch where you're going! Stupid slut.

Downcast: (Getting in Sniper's face) Hey, don't talk about my woman like that!

Sniper: F*ck you Downcast!

Downcast: Hey, you remember all those times when you and the Dynasty used to outnumber me and attack me? Well I've got backup now! And where is the Dynasty?

Sniper: Look, I don't give a damn about your gold medals, your 3 skanks or any other kind of crap you wanna talk about, but you had better just stay the hell out of the Dynasty's way cuz we're not the strongest group in the NFWA or nothing!

DD: See. I told you that the Dynasty was still together. You hear what Sniper said…what the? Why is crap falling from the ceiling?!

KT: Oh no. It's Harley Hart and Vince Johnson with their glorified gang. Come on…what are they doing out here?

VJ: Hey Taylor, you didn't forget about our match, did you?!

Harley Hart: Where's your partner Kevin?! Huh? Where's the proud American who's gonna stand up and defend his country against the evil Canadians? Where's…Shark?

Harley: Oh wait, I forgot. I ran Shark out of the NFWA! I know…how about…Prez Panther? He put on a good match at the PPV, he can wrestle me tonight. Oh wait. We're gonna meet him in court when we take the NFWA and there will be nothing that he can do about it. So I guess I'll save him until then. Is there anybody here to help you Kevin.

KT: look, I have a job to do. I really don't wanna fight.

VJ: Well it's too late for that your jerk!

DD: Whoa!!! Vince Johnson just slapped the taste out of Kevin's mouth!

VJ: Come on! Hit me back!!!! I dare you to hit me!

DD: Whoa!!! Kevin Taylor just hit him right in the face!! Oh!!! Harley Hart just hit him with a chair! That's not right. You wanna fight somebody then why don't you fight me you big faggot!

Head: …

Sniper: Look, I gotta call you back. I have to do this promo thing. You know how it is. Later! What’s up Rosie?

RS: Well, Sniper, you left Hell on Earth Saturday immediately following your match with Mad Dreams. I tried to get a…

Sniper: You know what babe, stop right there! First let me tell you something Kevin Taylor, I didn’t leave anyone "high and dry". That’s not my style! But P-Diddy had that match in the bag, and once again let that two-timing, stank country heifer Tina screw it up for us. When a female starts to get in the way of business, it’s time for me to wash my hands of the situation. The Bomb Squad is the best damn tag team in the biz, and we proved that last Saturday! We took Dreams to school, and put on a clinic of picture-perfect, tandem tag team offense!!! The world has never seen moves like we executed out there. And we lose because of that bitch???! No, I didn’t leave them high and dry, I simply left in disgust! When I go out there and prove I’m the better man, or that we’re the better team, just to loose it like that, I feel it’s only right that I separate myself from the entire scene in order to prevent myself from doing things I would probably later regret. We’ve all seen what I’m capable of in the past Rosie! I almost eliminated Shark from the map twice, and I’ve done countless other sadistic things in my career that you idiots here in the NFWA don’t know about, but will when the time is right!

RS: Sniper, what is the relationship between Kurt Angle and Downcast?

Sniper: How in the hell would I know? I left the arena before all of the crap went down. Whatever those two have going on, I’m sure we’ll find out right here on the mothership, Friday Night Slam. If we don’t the only thing you can do is tune in every week, and find out!

RS: Alright, what is the status of the Dynasty, Sniper? It seems you guys really haven’t been doing much?

Sniper: WHAT???!!! How dare you, Rose! I don’t know how many times Prez Panther and I have to tell you people, that the Dynasty is alive and well!!! We aren’t going anywhere for a long time! For as long as there is a Panther & Sniper in this fed, there will be a Dynasty. You people must have sh*t for brains. You all ask and ask, just like a bunch of jackasses!!!

RS: Well…

Sniper: No, shut up!!!!! Damnit, I’m sick of this, and I’m going to end it right here. Panther has fired a lot of people here, and stabbed a lot of people in the back. Hey, I even stuck it to Downcast! But feel me on this one. There is a bond almost as great, if not greater, than blood between Panther and I. The Bomb Squad will live until our dying days!!! That’s right! I can’t say the same for whoever decides to ride with us in the Dynasty. Our road doggs decide their own fate in the Dynasty. But as for Prez Panther & the Sniper as a duo, we will always be that, and we’ll always be tight… NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS!!! Remember that NFWA.

I would like to end this with an address to all of our enemies out there. Calgary Hitmen, Natural Born Playaz and anyone else with a problem for the Dynasty, prepare for a grade A, Philly-style ass whoopin’ every time you step through the ropes with the Bomb Squad. We will bring it to the table and deliver every single time. Panther will prove to all of you why he is the Champion of Champions, the Heavy Hitter, and the Personification of Greatness. And me? I will prove why I’m not the game, but that I AM this game! That I am the greatness, and the Main Event. The Bomb Squad is the greatest tag team to ever grace this biz, and the Dynasty is the greatest supergroup ever formed. Don’t worry all of you naïve simpletons in the NFWA… soon you will all see it the Dynasty’s way! And you know what Rosie, THERE CAN’T BE ANY OTHER WAY!!!!!!! Now get the hell out of my office!

Panther and Chyna: Thanks.

Panther: What was that all about?

Sniper: Oh, nothing, just the usual from those interviewers. Trying to stir corporate crazy crap in the Dynasty! You know!!!

Panther: Well check this out.

DD: Haha! Did you see Taylor get his ass whooped by Canadians? I feel sorry for his mother. I would never show my face on TV again if I got beat up by Canadians. That's like getting your ass kicked by a pack of wild cockroaches. And speaking of cockroaches…that overgrown cockroach Kaos will go 1 on 1 with my new hero, Downcast for the X-Treme Title. Hahaha! Taylor got his ass whooped!

Harley: What you just saw right here was typical American Justice. Always thinking that they're better than somebody else! You people think that you're the greatest country in the world. Well like my friend Adolph Castro Rocker would say, tonight you Americans proved that you're good for only one thing, keeping Canada from falling into the ocean. And if you wanna know why that is, it's because the US sucks it!!!!

DD: This geographical jackass. Rosie is out here with me, and what the hell is his problem? And where's Head?!

RS: I really don't know.

DD: You see Rosie, by you not being a lesbian you don’t know what it's like to keep a woman happy. You see, women like men who win, like me. When was the last time you saw me lose? It's why I get all of the girls.

RS: There was so much wrong with what you just said that I'm not even gonna comment on it. And I do remember you getting beat up by the Hitmen tonight and Shyanne at the PPV but who's counting. Downcast has that X-Treme Title belt…he swings Kaos…Kaos ducks and hits him with a clothesline that sends him to the floor. There are a lot of Professional fans in the house tonight, which could explain the boos for Downcast because of his actions after losing the World Title! And watch Kaos…OH!!! Baseball slide almost knocked his teeth out! He sent Downcast mouth first right into the guardrail Dave!

DD: Jevona's over there to help him out, maybe she can give him mouth to mouth.

RS: Oh please. Kaos just gave Downcast fist to mouth! Boot to stomach! DDT…no! Downcast rammed Kaos into the guardrail and he clotheslined him into the crowd! Downcast is looking underneath the ring…uh oh, he's got a ladder! Look out Kaos…OH! That ladder rammed right into Kaos' face! Downcast swings the ladder around and not only does he hit Kaos in the back of the head and knock him over the railing, but he did the same to a couple of fans! Kaos back to his feet and drills Downcast with a right hand to the stomach! Irish whip…Downcast with a reversal and--OH!!!! Kaos crashed knee first into the stairs and then flipped over and landed on his head! This is over Dave!

DD: Yeah! Downcast always was the greatest Extreme Champ of all time!

RS: Why'd you spell it like that? Downcast with a cover on the floor…1…2…kickout by Kaos! Downcast looks a little frustrated and he told Leena to get him a glass of water. She just took Dave's water and she handed it to Downcast and he's sipping…oh my gosh! Kaos just got up and Downcast shattered that glass over his head! He may have cut Kaos to shreds! And now he has a steel chair…he bashes Kaos right in the skul! Cover…1…2…kickout! Downcast has to be impressed by the guts and intestinal fortitude of Kaos. Downcast walks over to the Australian announce table now…why did he do that? He just hit one of our announcers from Down Under and he's pulling Kaos onto the table. What is he doing?

DD:He's going for Total Dispear!

RS: I think you're right! No! Back body drop by Kaos and Downcast landed on top of our table! Kaos is back to his feet…elbow drop through the table on Downcast!!! You ok Dave?

DD: That was so ignorant! Kaos deserves to be shot!

RS: Don't say that. Downcast is hurt and now Kaos walks over to Shyanne…what the hell is he doing with her?! Downcast gets back up and sees what's going on…he charges at Kaos and…OH NO!!! Downcast accidentally speared Shyanne! Leena from behind bashes Kaos with a chair! Kaos has Leena by the hair…he just kissed Leena! Low blow by Jevona on Kaos and he goes down! Kurt Angle is out here and he's attending to Shyanne. Downcast grabs Kaos and throws him into the ring. He looks mad!

DD: Yeah. The true code of the Delaware is to always protect your womens! I hope she's OK for the swimsuit contest though.

RS: Pig. Downcast backs Kaos into a corner and he's stomping a mudhole in him. Kurt is carrying Shyanne back to the dressing room and Downcast is hot about the fact that she's been hurt. He just asked Jevona for a baseball bat! Kaos is back up and Downcast just hit one right out of the park! Cover…1…2…foot on the ropes for Kaos! Neither of these men will stay down!

DD: Of course not. Especially with…

RS: Shut up Dave!!! Don’t even say it, just shut up! Downcast Irish whips Kaos into the buckle and drills him with a powerslam! He hooks the leg…1…2…kickout by Kaos again! Downcast looks like he's ready for the kill…right hand sends Kaos back to the corner. Downcast signals for the spear…oh!!! He hit shoulder first off the ringpost!

DD: Maybe he shouldn't try that anymore.

RS: I know what you mean. DDT by Kaos and Downcast's head bounced on top of that baseball bat! 1…2…kickout by Downcast! Kaos has turned the tide and he looks ready for the Ticking Time bomb…

DD: It's the British Bulldog.

DD: It's a little thing called revenge, Rosie! Kaos attacked him earlier!

RS: Well Kaos is gonna get robbed by these damn Calgary Hitmen…

DD: What's that?

RS: It's not what, it's who! Who is that coming down…that's Ricky Bruiser from the GFW!!!!! What's he doing here, he doesn't work here! He's got brass knuckles and he just cold cocked the Bulldog from behind! He runs into the ring…OH!!!! Downcast caught him with a low blow and shoves him back to the floor! Kaos tries for a right hand but got speared! Downcast just signaled for the end! He hooks up Kaos…Total Dispear! We have a brand new X-Treme Cham--OH MY GOD! Bruiser from behind just cold cocked Downcast with the knux! He pulls Kaos on top…1…2…3!!!

DD: That sucked! Who the hell does this Ricky Bruiser think he is??? He doesn't even work here. Arrest his ass! Put him under the jail!

RS: Ricky is celebrating with Kaos…uh oh! Here comes Kurt Angle with a 4X4! OH! He just shattered it over Bruiser's head!!! Jevona has 2 chairs and she tosses them into Kurt and Downcast. Downcast is dazed and so is Kaos…OH! Kurt just took Kaos' head off! And now they're stomping away on them and hammering them with chairs! Here comes Viper from the locker room…OH! He just caught a chairshot! Angle with the Olympic Slam on Viper and now he jumps up in Kaos' face with the Olympic Medals.

DD: It's the Professional!!!

RS: The Professional is out to the ring with a chair…Angle swings at him and misses..Pro doesn't miss with his!!! Jevona and Leena tried to attack The Professional from behind but he saw them coming. Oh! He hit Leena with that chair! Oh!!! He just hit Jevona with the same chair! Both women are down…Downcast misses with a chairshot and hits off of the ropes…Three 6!!!! Three 6 just came from the crowd and nearly decapitated him with that pipe shot!

DD: No!!! That's the same pipe shot that killed X-Pac, and now he killed Downcast! This is the darkest day in the history of our sport!

RS: Angle is down, Downcast is down, the ladies are down and The Natural Born Playas stand side by side with Badd Blood and…Ricky Bruiser???!

RS: What in the world? Why did Jaguar just attack Bad Influence?

Pro: You see how easy that sh*t was? I took down Angle in less than 3 seconds. If he can't last 3 seconds there, what makes him think he can beat me in a match?

Three 6: Tru dat!

Double C: Oh, it's Sniper! You finally realize that Philly is a big pile of sh*t compared to New York?

Sniper: Look…I could go upside your head for saying something dumb like that but I'm gonna let that go this time.

Three 6: What, you came here to ask us to be your partner or sumptin?

Sniper: Hey, you've got the World Champ, the former I-C Champ…this jackass over here. And I know you want a piece of Panther, so why don't you team with me?

Pro: Alright. Tonight me and Double C will team with you.

Sniper: Why not Three 6?

Three 6: (Eating grapes) Cuz I'm busy, bitch!

Sniper: (trying to calm himself down) Alright. Alright. Double C, Pro and Sniper. We're kicking Panther's ass tonight.

Double C: Alright, now get out before we change our mind!

RS: I'm still trying to figure out why Bad Influence was attacked in the back. And here come he and Reckless Youth up to the stage and they attack Badd Blood! B.I. and Kaos going at it, Reckless and Viper going at it! Oh God it's Brad Patterson and his gang of referees! They're attacking Siege again!

DD: poor Siege. The fact that this many people in the NFWA are against him only proves to me that he still hasn't chosen to discover a little invention called mouthwash! I guarantee they'll leave him alone after he uses some Listy!

RS: Please try and be nice, Dave. Rodney Demp has a fire extinguisher…he just sprayed the referees and now he and Siege are fighting off the refs! Oh! Siege just hiplocked a ref off of the stage! Demp sends another one off of the stage! Demp clotheslines another and they all turn to Brad Patterson, the head referee! He's trying to escape but they have him trap! Oh my goodness he's climbing the Panthertron!

DD: He's like 59 years old! Somebody stop Siege!

RS: Siege is climbing up 1 of those ladders to try and reach Patterson…oh!!! Viper just dropkicked the ladder…it's teetering and it fell off the stage and Siege is hurt! Demp with a forearm shot from behind Viper. There's a punch to the back of the head. A kick to the back. He goes for an Irish whip…reversal by Viper into a drop toe hold that sends Demp crashing headfirst into the ladders! Those ladders fell off of the stage and right on top of B.I. and Kaos! They're lying underneath those 3 ladders that way 25 lbs. each that fell from a 10-ft stage! You know that has to hurt. Back up on the stage Viper just booted Demp in the back of the head. Reckless Youth catches Viper with a right hand that sends him staggering to the edge of the stage. He springboards off of Demps back and caught Viper with a dropkick that knocked him right off of the stage and he landed right on top of those ladders that are on top of B.I. and Kaos! And now Youth picks up Demp…he's about to hiptoss Demp off of the stage…Demp counters into a DDT off of the stage and hard onto the concrete floor!!! I think that everyone in this match has been killed and it hasn't even been going on for 5 minutes yet!

DD: Can you hear these fans chanting for B.I.?!

RS: I think they're chanting for everyone. Demp is starting to move. He climbs back up to the stage and he's going for 1 of those ladders. He's got it and he's dragging it down the ramp towards the ring…uh oh. Kaos and B.I. are back up and they're fighting over by the entranceway! Demp is setting up the ladder in the ring…he's making that climb…rung by rung…he's reaching for the tag belts…

DD: Look out! It's Viper!

RS: Viper runs to the ring and he has a steel chair…BOOM! Hard shot to the back of Demp!!! Demp is still on the ladder and he's still climbing…Viper hits off the ropes and dropkicks that ladder…wait a minute! OH!!!!!! Demp took a hard spill from the top of the ladder and he landed hard on top of the Saskatchewan Hardcore International Table…that's the last time I say that tonight. I promise. Viper climbs to the top rung of that ladder and he's gonna get those title belts…NO!!!! Moonsault off the top of the ladder onto the table that Demp is on and it still didn't break! B.I. is out to the ring now and he climbs upon the ring apron…Mick Foley type elbow drop and this time the table splinters into pieces! Back in the aisle we've got Kaos brawling away with Reckless Youth, who's 1/2 dead after that leaping DDT off of the stage. Irish whip by Kaos sends him sailing into the barricade! Kaos has that ladder and he just skateboarded it into the face of Reckless! He may have a concussion! Kaos is looking under the ring now…he's pulling out tables?! He just set up a table over by the ramp and now what the hell? He just stacked another table on top of it…he just put another table on top of that! We've got 3 tables stacked on the floor and he's pulling out a 4^th…Siege is back and he tosses another ladder into the table and they bounce back at Kaos and the X-Treme/Tag Champ is hurt.

DD: We've got tables…we've got ladders…we're only missing 1 thing and I think we're about to see it…FIRE!!!!!!!

RS: That wasn't what I had in mind! Viper just threw gasoline on Demp and threw a match at him!!!!! This isn't Hardcore, it's insane!!!!

DD: He's burning Demp…you crispy bastard! Don't run over here!

RS: Viper sprays him with the fire extinguisher…then hits him in the head with it! Superkick by B.I.!!!! B.I. picks up a ladder and he climbs into the ring…what the hell is Siege doing?! He just put broken glass on the 1^st table and thumbtacks on the 2^nd and now he's lighting all 3 on fire! B.I. has set up that ladder in the ring and he's starting to climb and Siege just saw him…he threw the gas can at B.I. and he takes a huge fall that straddles the top rope! Now Siege is making the climb…Reckless Youth has that table set on the top rope and he climbs on top of that table and shoves Siege off of the ladder with a flying clothesline! Viper went for a chairshot but missed…Reckless Dropkicks the chair back into his face! Reckless picks up the ladder now and it looks like he's gonna make the climb…no he's setting it on top of that table!

DD: We've seen this before!

RS: Now Kaos is setting a ladder on top of that table. Both Kaos and Reckless Youth are on top of that table and they're climbing those ladders…I think Reckless is going for the Guillotine Leg Drop onto Viper but he's blocked by Kaos! They're both on ladders that are set on the top rope. I've got a bad feeling about this! Kaos is hammering away on Reckless and now Viper is climbing that table and he's starting to head up onto Reckless Youth's ladder!

DD: Are they nuts?! They're gonna get killed! Get down you idiots!

RS: Now Demp is climbing up onto the table and he's up on Kaos' ladder! I've never seen anything like this in my entire life! Never! Reckless Youth has Viper and…he's going for a huracan--OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! Viper with a powerbomb from almost 30 ft in the air right through the ring!!!!

DD: Oh my God they're dead!!!!! They're dead and buried and…not alive! Damn it call the Undertaker back here!

RS: We've still got Demp and Kaos on that ladder up there…B.I. has the steel stairs…he just threw them at that ladder and they…OH!!!!!! They went through the 3 flaming tables!!!!!

DD: Now Demp and Kaos are dead!!!! Death never takes a vacation! He's working overtime tonight. When you guys get to the after life kick Mad Dog's ass for me…please?

RS: You jackoff. And you wonder why women don't like you. Siege used that chair to bash the steel stairs back into B.I.'s face. I'm really worried about Reckless Youth after that powerbomb! I've never seen anything like that. Siege pulls that table down off the top rope and he sets it up in the ring. He's signaling for the Takeover…here…no…Jackknife by B.I. takes Siege right through the table!!! Every man in this match is out except B.I.! No…Viper is climbing out of that hole in the ring and he's crawling over to the ladder as is B.I. and they're both making the climb at the same time! It's a race to see who gets those tag team title belts!

DD: It looks like B.I. cuz Viper is getting blood all in his eyes. I can't believe they set Demp on fire.

RS: I can't believe much in this match. B.I. has his hand on the belts…Viper with a thrust to the throat…B.I. with a right hand…these men are battling it out to see who can reach those belts…B.I. with a headbutt and Viper falls off of the ladder! That's it! Team Hardcore have won the tag…low blow by Siege on B.I.!!! He has Siege in a crucifix position…OK!!!!! There's the Takeover from the ladder!!!! He may have snapped B.I. in half and now Siege is making the climb!!! Siege is climbing up the ladder…can he reach it??? Can he…YES! He got the tag belts!!!! This one is over!!!

DD: Wow! I thought they were dead!

RS: That was one of the best matches in the history of FNS I think…maybe ever!

DD: I said it would be! I told you I never lose!

RS: Wow, congrats to the Tag Champs but that match literally came down to the wire. Up next it's the swimsuit contest…

DD: Yeah!!!!!!

RS: Yes Dave. You'll be refereeing that one, and that match is followed by Professional and Angle. Plus, sometime tonight we're gonna see in 6 man action, Sniper in his partners Double C and the World Champion Professional Vs Panther and 2 partners that haven't been chosen yet.

Shyanne: Get out!!!! We're still getting dressed!!!

Kurt: Hey, this is Prez Panther! The Greatest Guy alive. If he can’t see you without your clothes on then nobody should see you with your clothes off. It's true! It's true!

Downcast: Shut up Kurt!

Prez: Relax ladies. Just keep doing what you're doing cuz I promise that I won't look at you.

Downcast: Ok, but what do you want?

Prez: Downcast I'm gonna give you the opportunity of a lifetime! You see, things didn't exactly go your way in the X-Treme Title match cuz of Trick Bruiser and that lowlife coward Professional. Well how would you like to get revenge on them? I know you want a piece of the Pro, don't you?

Downcast: Yeah.

Prez: So how about you and Kurt by my partners tonight against Sniper, Pro and Double C?

Kurt: We'd love…

Downcast: Hold up Kurt. Why should we trust you? I mean…everytime I trust you or I trust Sniper or anybody from Philadelphia, PA it seems like something bad happens to me. Now you would have to think that I'm pretty dumb to fall for your tricks again.

Prez: Actually…I do think you're pretty dum…(Chyna punches him in the arm) I mean no! You were a World Champion. You're not dumb! You're Downcast. But if you don't trust me then how about I add a special ingredient. If either of you get the win over the Professional then you have a guaranteed contract against the World Champion for the September PPV. How's that? You trust me now?

Downcast: No but I'm gonna get my Title back if it's the last thing I do. You've got a deal Panther.

Prez: (smiling) OK…but before I leave can you do me a favor? Tell Jevona she's got a nice ass! Later!

RS: So Downcast and Angle will team with Panther!!! What a big match!!!!

DD: And Jevona has a nice ass!!! That's the best news…

RS: Go to a commercial!

DD: OK, so 1^st we're gonna start off with the Champion of Women's wrestling! Let's see if she's the Champion of bikinis too! Jevona…show it!!!

RS: It's a sad day in the NFWA when we're actually doing all this for cheap T & A. Dave doesn't surprise me, but I'm actually shocked at Head.

DD: (Wiping the sweat off of his forehead) Wow…you do have a great ass. Now…Shyanne…Head says that you should show it!!!!

DD: Can I have a kiss?

Shyanne: No!

DD: Damn! Lousy Head.

RS: If anybody wants me I'll be watching the Simpsons.

DD: OK Crowd…who won this match? Is it…Shyanne? (Loud cheers and howls. Some one actually throws a beach ball into the ring) Or was it…Jevona? (Loud cheers again. About a tie with Shyanne's cheers) Well it's too close to say…

ADC: Filthy American scum, you should be ashamed of yourselves! Especially you, Head! My Country expected better from you than to be participating in this…smutfest with these 2…tramps! Shame on you! Shame on all of you! You wonder why the rest of the World dispises America, and the answer comes from trash like this! You Americans have no respect for morals! You have no respect for values! You have no ethics! Your children run the streets 24 hrs a defacing your property and breaking the law. And why? Because of tramps like these women here! I demand that these 2 trollops be banned from TV or I shall be forced to get physical!!!!!!!

DD: OH! Low blow by Shyanne on Adolph Rocker! That physical enough for you? You jerk! Let me hit him.

RS: Well Shyanne and Jevona are holding Rocker and he's getting hammered by Delaware Dave! That's embarrassing! That's like getting beat up by Hulk Hogan. Uh oh! Rocker broke free…run Dave!!! Dave is running away from the ring and Jevona smashes him in the head with that Women's belt!!! Jevona and Shyanne just got physical with Adolph Rocker and Shyanne has a mic!

Shyanne: Hey Jevona, speaking of physical, when are you gonna give me my title shot? I want that belt more than anything in the world and I'm gonna get it sooner or later! So when do I get my shot?!

Jevona: Look Shy, I wanna be your friend so if it means that much to you I'll lie down and let you win the title! I don't want anything to ruin our friendship. OK?

RS: Jevona just laid down just like at Hell on Earth…and we've got a ref out here. He just signaled for the bell…

DD: This is a match?!

RS: Guess so!

DD: Aww!

RS: Shut up. Shyanne put a foot…no. She puts 1 finger on the chest of Jevona…1…2…3/4 nelson!!! Jevona has Shyanne hooked…1…2…no! She almost did it again! Shyanne is back up and she's hot at Jevona! Right hand to the jaw! Again! We' ve got these 2 women slugging it out in a fistfight! Irish whip by Jevona…she ducked the head too soon and got a DDT for her troubles! Cover…1…2…kickout by Jevona! Shyanne drags Jevona back to the buckle…tornado DDT! The leg is hooked…1…2…kickout by Jevona! Shyanne came prepared to fight it looks like!

DD: In a bikini!

RS: Shut up fool! Shyanne has Jevona set for a bulldog…OH! Jevona counters with a bridge suplex! Pin…1…2…kickout by Shyanne! Shy's a tough girl!

DD: I'm sure that Kevin Taylor is rooting for her in his hospital bed!

RS: (Laughing) Yeah Kevin does like her. But he's not here so screw him. Jevona is setting up for a…spear and it's perfectly executed! And now Jevona is looking to finish her "friend" Shyanne off.

DD: "Friend"?! What are you trying to say?

RS: That Jevona…I'm not gonna explain myself to you. Jevona is setting up for Total Dispear…double leg takedown Shyanne…she slingshots her into the ringpost…Jevona comes out but catches a boot to the midsection…butterfly suplex! Shyanne hooks the leg…1…2…3!!!!!!

DD: In a bikini!!!!!!

RS: Congrats to Shyanne. Jevona is gonna be the sportsman…sportschick and actually hand the title over to her. Here comes Downcast out to the ring to congratulate…it's the Professional!!!! He just nailed Downcast with the bat to the back of the head! Oh he hit Jevona again!!! And now look at the Pro! He's stalking the new Champion with that baseball bat!

DD: These sadistic fans want him to hurt poor Shyanne! Don't do it you heathen!

RS: Here comes Kurt Angle and he clips the knee of the Pro as Shyanne runs to the back! Angle is stomping away on the Professional! They are scheduled to meet next in a non-title match but Kurt doesn't wanna wait! He's going for the Olympic Slam…Pro with an amazing counter into a float over bulldog! Now Pro is hammering Kurt Angle with right hands! Downcast is down on the floor! I don’t have much to say but stay tuned because this brawl will continue when we return with more FNS!

DD: Oh no! I was gonna eat that! Kurt, put it down!

RS: Kurt Angle just hit the Professional in the head with a giant salami. That really hurts. I can tell you from experience!

DD: You got hit in the head with lunch meat?

RS: Don't ask! Thumb to the eye by the Professional on Angle! And now he's got one of those big trays…oh!!! He just threw hot soap onto Kurt Angle!!!! He grabs him by the hair and throws him into a big bowl of spaghetti-o's! There's Jake "Iceman" Fox! He was coming to get something to eat but instead finds this battle! The Professional just lifted up that "NFWA" Ice sculpture!

DD: That thing cost $5,000! That idiot better not break that!

RS: It's melt anyway but he's about to destroy it over his head…Chyna with a low blow on the Professional!!! Where in the World did she come from?! It's Prez Panther and Chyna and Chyna is assaulting the Pro while Panther gives him the badmouth! And here comes Sniper to join the fight…OH!!! Sniper just blasted Chyna with a right hand!!! He just nail Prez Panther too!!! Sniper has an ice pick and he and Chyna are getting out of dodge. They were able to cause enough distraction for Kurt to turn the tide. Kurt picks up the Professional…OH! Belly to Belly suplex through the table by Kurt!!! And the Professional is covered in food!

DD: I tell you, that Professional is nothing but a slob! And not just a slob, but a greedy slob too! You know in Tacoma, WA you can get hanged for doing what the Professional just did!

RS: That's not true. Who told you that?

DD: My ex-wife Washington Wilma told me. She always tells the truth unless she's in court taking 1/2 of what I own! Well f*ck her, that fat, lying, trash eating, boot licking slut! I don't care if the bitch dies! I'll piss on her grave!!!!

RS: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK. I'm trying really hard to ignore that last thing you said. Kurt Angle has a chair and he whacks the Professional across the back with it! And again! Angle grabs him by the hair…he runs with the Professional and rams his face into the wall. He picks him up and hits an atomic drop on the Pro! Right hand by Angle and they're leaving the dining area. Clothesline by Angle knocks the World Champ into a laundry cart. He's pushing the cart out to the entrance it looks like...yes he is. Kurt Angle is out on the stage and he's about to push the Pro down to the ring…whoa! Pro just shot some kind of stain remover in Kurt's face! He gets out of the laundry cart and nails him with a right hand and now Angle is in the cart. The Professional is rolling it to the ramp…oh no! He shoved it down the ramp and it crashed into the steel stairs and Angle flew headfirst into the ringpost! The Professional runs down to ringside and connects with a right to the temple of Angle! He throws him back into the ring…the Pro climbs to the top rope and nails the twisting Huracanrana!!!! There's the 1^st pin of the match…1…2…kickout by Angle. The Professional backs him to the buckle…1…2…3…4…5…6 punches by the Pro until Angle countered with an inverted atomic drop…Angle Plex! 1…2…oh! How did he kick out of that????!!

DD: Here come Downcast and Shyanne out here now! They've been out here a lot tonight!

RS: Yeah, and Downcast seems really pissed off at the Professional! He's willing to do anything to get his hands the Professional! Shyanne climbs up on the ring apron and she has the referee…Downcast throws in a steel chair to Angle…Angle swings at the Pro…OH!!!! Angle hit the referee! The Professional went for a clothesline and missed…Olympic Slam!!!! It would be over if the ref wasn't out!

DD: Damn clumsy Angle!

RS: Angle had this match won with the Olympic Slam, but it's because of his cheating that has cost him a possible win! Downcast is in the ring and he's telling Angle to get the Professional back up…and Shyanne is in the ring with a chair too. Angle is holding up the Professional…Downcast swings but Pro ducks and he hits Angle! Shyanne swings at Pro but she hits Downcast!!! Downcast is down! Angle is out! Shyanne is checking on Downcast. The Professional wakes the referee and he's climbing to the top rope…Angle is out but he just felt the Maneuver! Cover…1…2…3!!!

DD: What a cheater!!!

RS: It was Downcast and Angle who did all of the cheating. The Professional got an incredible win against 2 opponents and Shyanne. But up next Downcast and Angle get a chance for revenge, because they team with the Panther to face Sniper, Double C and the Professional! We'll be back!

DD: That Foley gets beat up every card.

RS: Yeah, I noticed that to, but this time we don't know why Firestorm would attack Foley. Why did he do that?

RS: Sniper is chasing Prez Panther and Chyna around the ring with an ice pick!!!! This is crazy!

DD: Sniper is crazy! And he wonders why his crackhead ass goes to jail so many times! Somebody call the cops! I thought they were friends for life?!

RS: Panther is moving pretty fast but Sniper is gaining on him…oh!!! Panther tripped! Panther tripped and fell and Sniper's got his…Chyna with a right hand allows she and Panther to escape! Panther jumps into the crowd with Chyna following behind him and Sniper is chasing after her! This is nuts!

DD: This whole damn night is nuts!

DD: Where's Prez Panther?!

RS: I have no clue what's going on. The Dynasty has completely broken up thanks to the match made by Mick Foley here tonight! As soon as we get you word on what's going on with the Bomb Squad we'll get it to you. Right now Downcast is trying to tear the Professional apart! Irish whip by the Pro on Downcast….Professional with a leapfrog…Angle clotheslines him from behind and then Double C attacks Angle from behind…German Suplex…1…2…kickout!

DD: No fair! That ref needs to get some serious control over this crap!

RS: Downcast climbs to the top rope…he misses with the flying clothesline and crashes hard into the canvas! The Professional climbs to the top rope…twisting…powerbomb by Downcast!!! Cover…1…2…no!!! Downcast was a 1-count away from a World Title Shot in September! Double C has Angle set up on the top rope for a superplex…low blow by Angle…OH!!! Double C fell off of the top rope and hit facefirst on the steel! He may be out like a light and now it's 1 on 2 with Downcast and Angle against the Professional, at least until Cannon gets back into the fight. They're both stomping away on Angle! Double Irish whip by Angle and Downcast…double clothesline takes the Professional down! Angle goes for the cover…1…2…kickout by the Pro! Downcast drives an elbow into the throat…1…2…kickout by the Pro again!

DD: These guys will do anything to get that title shot at the September event! Maybe I'll go in there and beat Pro to get the shot!

RS: In your dreams Dave. Shyanne is on her way back to ringside. She's been really busy tonight. Downcast sets the Pro on the top rope…now he's climbing the other corner while Angle goes up on the Pro…overhead belly to belly superplex…Downcast follows up with a flying elbow. These 2 men are ready to finish the Champion off…Angle's going for the Olympic Slam…Double C pulls him to the floor and those 2 are trading blows on the outside!!! We're left with Downcast and the Professional…Downcast hooks up the Pro…Total Dispear!!! He hooks the leg…1…2…the Professional got his foot on the rope! Downcast almost had him! He picks him back up…Irish whip…Pro reverses into a spinning heel kick! He's looking to finish this match off now. The Professional climbs to the top rope…he nails the Maneuver on Downcast! Light out! 1…2…NO!!!!! Downcast kicked out!!!

DD: Alright, you've gotta be kidding me!

RS: Downcast must really hate the Professional to kick out after that! I think he's the 1^st person to do that.

DD: Oh, you make it sound so negative just cuz Downcast is against your friend the Professional.

RS: My friend?!

DD: Yeah.

RS: Whatever.

Prez: (out of breathe) Delaware Dave and the lovely Rosie Sanchez. I hope you enjoyed this night, cuz it just got better.

RS: Where's Sniper?

Prez: We went out to the Parking lot, he needed that little ice pick to try and fight me but that didn't mean anything cuz I did what I do best and that's deliver a Champion of Champions style ass whooping to that punk bitch, and Chyna was there to see me do it!

RS: Where is Chyna?

Prez: Give the woman some space!

RS: OK, this is supposed to be your match but the Professional, Double C, Angle and Downcast have put on a good show. The Professional is back up…he tries for a superkick but Downcast ducks and Pro caught the referee! Look on the floor now! Angle is trying to hit the Olympic Slam on Double C….Cannon blocks it into an Olympic Slam of his own! Angle's head bounced off of the steel ramp. Here come Leena and Jevona to the ring and they climb inside with Shyanne. Leena charges in at the Professional but she catches a DVD!!! Jevona charges in but she catches a dropkick! Shyanne is challenging the Pro to fight her…it's a trick! Downcast just came from behind with a steel chair…the Pro saw it coming and dropkicked it back into his face. Shyanne tried to sneak up behind the Pro but he saw her coming!

DD: Don't you dare hit Shyanne! Leave her alone Pro!

RS: Shyanne is the only 1 of Downcast's women who the Pro hasn't KO'd tonight. He just grabbed her by the hair…they're kissing?!!

DD: No way!!!

RS: Shyanne is hugging the Professional! It was all a setup on Downcast. I can't believe it!

Prez: Oh look! Chyna's back! And she's with Trish Stratus and Jaguar. I think I had better go!

RS: Shyanne and the Professional have played Downcast for a fool. Double C is climbing into the ring when Chyna grabbed his ankle…Double C just decked her with a right hand…Jaguar just slammed Double C into the stairs again. The Professional just realized what was going on on the floor and he jumps out to help Double C! Jaguar is going at it with the Professional…Trish is in the ring and she bulldogs Shyanne from behind! Trish Stratus is attacking Shyanne in the ring…the Professional just saw what was going on their and he's back in the ring to help out Shyanne…Prez Panther just grabbed the Pro and nails him with a Panther Cutter! What the hell is the Dynasty doing? Chyna just took a pitcher of ice water and dumped it on over Downcast and Angle. Downcast and Angle are slowly getting back up while Prez Panther and Chyna put the boots to the Pro. Angle and Downcast are now joining in…uh oh! Sniper is back!

DD: And he's got a chair!

RS: Sniper looks kinda hurt. Who knows what the Dynasty did to him? He jumps over the barricade and he rushes into the ring and Jaguar attacks him on the floor! Three 6 is back out with that lead pipe…Angle caught him coming in…Olympic Slam!!!

DD: Yeah! Panther's Tag Team is working lock clockwork!

RS: The Natural Born Playas and Shyanne are in deep trouble in the ring…Sniper has that chair and he's headed into the ring to help his partners…NO!!!! Sniper just hit the Professional with that steel chair!!! Sniper just gave Panther a high five! And Angle…and Downcast!!! Were they in cahoots all along?! Sniper throws the chair on the ground…Downcast hooks up the Professional…Total Dispear on the steel chair! No!!! There's the pin by Downcast on the Professional…here comes that no good referee Brad Patterson out to the ring…1…2…3!!!!

RS: Why did the Dynasty do this to the Natural Born Playas? Why did they setup the Professional? I thought they hated Downcast and Downcast hated them!

DD: Rosie…I think I know exactly what's going on…Downcast and Angle are the 2 newest members of the Dynasty!!!

RS: It can't be! Prez Panther and Sniper just tossed them shirts that say Dynasty on them and they just put them on!!! I can't believe that Downcast and Angle have sold out to the Dynasty! Ladies and gentlemen we'll see you on Gear!!!!!