VJ: Welcome everyone to the sold out Orlando Arena for the last PPV of the 2000! Welcome to Apocalypse Now!!!!!!!! Vince Johnson is here alongside Delaware Dave and isn’t it great to be back in the lovely state of Florida?!

DD: Vince I wish you were a little smarter so you could see what kind of an idiot you are now. I can think of at least 35 things wrong with this pisshole of a state: 1, it's not Delaware, 2, it's filled with nothing but retarded, handicapped, retired, donut-eating, golf-playing, election-ruining redneck bastards, but it's also the home of that idiot Downcast!!!! Florida is definitely the Canada of the USA!

VJ: What's wrong with Florida?! I happen to like it here!!!!!

DD: I didn't think it was possible Vince but you actually made Florida look worse by saying that.

VJ: Ladies and gentlemen, how about it?! Our special guest commentator for tonight is the home state boy, Downcast, who made an incredible return last night on FNS by ruining Kurt Angle's marriage to Jevona.

Downcast: No, what I did was keep Jevona from ruining her life by marrying that freak. But I'm not out here to talk about the Olympic Jackass, I'm here to see the biggest of PPV of the year!

VJ: That's right, check out this main event: the 2 time World Champion Killa defends his title against the Winner of the Overkill Royal Rumble, Lightning!!! That is gonna be an incredible battle.

DD: Yeah, but don't forget the Kamikaze match for the control of the NFWA! It's gonna be Sniper and Prez Firestorm!!! That's gonna be great!!!

VJ: We've also got a Dream Tag Match between arguably the 2 greatest Tag Teams in the history of the NFWA, the Elites do battle with the Side Show Freaks! The I-C, Toughman, X-Treme and Women's championships will be on the line tonight, Anarchy Vs Scarlet KV in a towering inferno match, Big Foot has promised us a surprise for the World Title!!

Downcast: And don't forget what the Professional said last week. He's gonna be here and he's gonna get a piece of somebody's ass!

DD: Not my ass!

Downcast: Of course not!

VJ: Ladies and gentlemen let's not wait any longer! Let's get down to business!

DD: Who gives a damn what he thinks! Look at Shyanne! Man! I'd drink her bath water!!!!!!

VJ: There's the lockup…Shyanne with a side headlock on Stacey. Stacey is trying to break this hold…she tried shoving Shy to the ropes but she holds on!!!!

Downcast: Shyanne's got spunk. I should know, I brought her to the NFWA!

DD: You lying snake!

Downcast: Can I kick his ass?

VJ: No, we need him for entertainment. Stacey tries running Shyanne into the corner but Shyanne counters…side headlock takeover by Shyanne into a pinning combo…1…2…kickout! Shy drives Stacey's shoulders to the mat…1…2…Stacey manages to get the left shoulder up. Shyanne with some brilliant mat wrestling and Stacey is getting frustrated! Stacey is trying to fight her way out of this headlock…she's back to her knees…

DD: She knows that position well!

Downcast: And you wonder why you don't have a girlfriend!

VJ: Stacey is hammering Shyanne with elbows to the midsection and the hold is broken! Stacey hits off the ropes and misses with a clothesline…Shyanne caught her with an elbow to the throat followed up by a swinging neckbreaker!! Cover by Shy…1…2…kickout by Stacey!!! Stacey back to her feet and catches a right to the jaw from Shy!! Shy tries for another one that's blocked…Stacey catches her with a big chop to the chest!

DD: WHOOO!!!!!!!!

VJ: Shyanne with a chop of her own!!! Stacey fires back…we've got a chopfest between the Champion and the challenger!!! Stacey catches Shyanne with a boot to the stomach…Irish whip sends her to the ropes…Shyanne ducks a Stacey clothesline and runs right into the Lou Thez Press!!! Stacey is hammering away with big rights to the side of the head of Shyanne! She picks Shy up…small package…1…2…kickout by Shyanne! This crowd is split between these 2 magnificent women!

DD: Vince, they're not men so get that goofy looking grin off of your face!

VJ: What are you trying to say? Stacey has the upper hand now…hard Irish whip sends Shyanne back to the buckle…Stacey turns her over into a powerslam!!! The leg is hooked…1…2…Shyanne kicks out and Stacey locks her in a reverse chinlock!!! The Champion is in trouble right here and Downcast, what are your opinions on this one?

Downcast: Well I think that these women are both great wrestlers. I know Shyanne is good, we have a little bit of a past together so I know she's damn tough! The winner of this match should give a title shot to Leena though!

VJ: This crowd is trying to rally behind Shyanne now. She's fading in this reverse chinlock…the ref checks the arm once…it drops once! It drops twice…if it drops one more time then we'll have a new Champion…Shyanne keeps the shoulder up!!!!!!!

DD: Come on Stacey!!!

VJ: Shyanne is trying to fight to get back to her feet…much like Stacey did earlier in the match! Shyanne is back up to her feet but Stacey has the hold locked on…Shyanne with a belly to back bridge suplex…1…2…Stacey got the shoulder up!!!

Downcast: I could've sworn that was a 3!!!!!!!!

VJ: Both Stacey and Shyanne are down! This match has taken a lot out of the both of them.

DD: Well maybe I need to go in there and p…

VJ: Shyanne is getting back to her feet and Stacey is moving slowly! Shy picks Stacey up…Stacey caught Shy with a right hand to the gut and now…Stacey's going to the ropes!!! Stacey is climbing the top…OH!!!!! Shyanne just shoved Stacey ribfirst into the ringpost and she's writhing in pain!!!! Shyanne is climbing up to top with Stacey and she picks her up…OH MY!!!! Fallaway Slam from the top into a bridge by Shyanne…1…2…kickout by the challenger!!! Shyanne picks Stacey back up…Irish whip sends Stacey to the ropes and Shy hits off as well…OH MY!!! Shyanne went for a bulldog but Stacey countered by slamming her facefirst into the mat!!! Stacey looks like she's ready for the kill now! She picks Shyanne back up…leaping piledriver!!!!!!! It’s over…1…2…3!!!!!!!!

DD: Man!!! Did you see that, Vince?!

VJ: That's a big win by Stacey Blitch over Shyanne and now Stacey is the brand new Women's Champion!!! Is that an omen for later on tonight here at Apocalypse Now?! Man!

Prez: Are you sure you're ok, Trish?

Trish: Yeah…I'm just a little sore! I'm gonna make Diamond pay for that!

Prez: Don't even worry about Diamond cuz I'm gonna make her and her worthless brother wish they never crossed the L.o.D.! Tonight all I'm worried about is destroying Sniper and his worthless Posse, and I'm gonna show the whole world what FIRESTORM'S WAY is about!!!!!!!

Prez: Where are you going?

Trish: I'm going with you.

Prez: no you're not! You're gonna stay here! After what happened to you last night I don't want you getting hurt again! Just stay with the L.o.D. and I'll handle Sniper myself!

Trish: But…

Prez: Just stay!!!!!!!!

Trish: OK. (Gives Firestorm a kiss) Good luck!

Downcast: Maybe it's just me, but Firestorm looked kinda worried about that Kamikaze match!

VJ: That is gonna be a war later on tonight! The entire shape of the NFWA could be turned upside down once again and…OH MY GOD!!!

DD: What the hell…that's Tina!!!!!!

VJ: Tina is attacking Trish Stratus in the parking lot!!!!!! Tina is doing a number on Trish!

DD: Didn't she get enough last night?! Leave her alone!!!!!

VJ: Tina has Trish by the hair and slams her right into the hood of that car!!!!!! Tina nails Trish in the face with a right hand!!!!!!

DD: Run Trish!!!!!! Run!!!!!

VJ: Tina just opened the trunk of that car…she threw Trish inside!!!!! Tina just threw Trish Stratus in the trunk of that car and it just pulled off with Trish inside!!!!! Oh my God, why did Tina do that!!!!

DD: What the hell is going on with everybody these days????! Trish never hurt anybody!!!!!!! Downcast, I demand that you go out there and beat the living sh*t out of that bitch Tina!!!!!!!

Downcast: HAHAHAH! Trish got what she deserved!!!

DD: Your momma!

VJ: Both of you stop!

DD: Wouldn't you be pissed if some idiot ruined the greatest night of your life?

Downcast: I don't know, maybe I should've bought him a wedding present or something!

VJ: Kurt is headed over here!!!!

Downcast: Wait…(laughs) Kurt, if you're smart you'll get your Olympic ass in the ring and wrestle your match before I have to hurt your ass!

DD: Beat his ass, Kurt!!!

VJ: The referee is over here to try and get Kurt Angle away from…OH!!! Kurt just slapped Downcast and Downcast spears him into the guardrail!!!!!!!

DD: Get him out of here!!!! Security!!!!!!!

VJ: Get Kurt Angle away from here!!!! Nightmare is headed over here to break this up…Jevona just nailed Nightmare with a lowblow…Darkness just speared Jevona!!!!!!!! Darkness and Jev…

VJ: It's all broken loose out here!!!! Here comes Reaper and Wolverine…they're out here and we've got a triple team assault on Downcast!!!!

DD: Catfight!!!!!! Catfight!!!!!!!!

VJ: I see it!!!!!!! We've lost control of this match before it even started!!!!! Angle just threw Downcast on top of our table…what's he gonna do here?!

DD: He's gonna give him the Olympic…Jevona is coming out of her shirt!!!!!! Look!!!!!!!

VJ: Kurt get down!!! Kurt Angle has Downcast up on our table…I think he's gonna give Downcast Total Dispear!!!!!! Don't do it, Kurt…OH!!!! Nightmare with a broomstick right to the small of the back of Angle!!!!!! Reaper and Wolverine are hammering on Nightmare now…OH!!!!!!!! Downcast with a double spear just put Wolverine and Reaper down!!!!!!

DD: That idiot!!! Just like a Floridian!!!!!!!

VJ: Reaper and Wolverine are headed back to the locker room and Downcast is chasing them both with a steel chair!!!!! Nightmare picks up Angle and throws him into the ring!

VJ: This match has officially started!!! Nightmare is on a mission to bring gold to Total Devastation and I think he will do anything to win the X-Treme Title here tonight! Nightmare rolls to the floor…he's getting something from underneath the ring…

DD: It's WOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!

VJ: That's not good for the Olympic Bad Ass!!! Nightmare slides the table into the ring and he's setting it up now!!! Kurt catches him from behind with a right hand! And another one!!! Kurt backs Nightmare into the buckle and he's burying those boots right into the midsection of the challenger!!! Angle with a hard Irish whip…DAMN IT!!! Did you head Nightmare bounce off the buckle?! It looked like the ring moved!!!!! And now Angle runs down the challenger with a clothesline!!!

DD: Here's some of that World Famous Olympic Whoop Ass, Vince! Don't blink cuz you might miss it!

VJ: Angle is setting up for an Olympic Slam through that table…no!!!!! Nightmare counters and throws Angle into the buckle…Nightmare tucks him in and Angle goes down!!!!!! Kurt Angle is down and now Nightmare has him by the leg…

DD AND VJ: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

VJ: Reverse powerbomb through the table by Nightmare!!! Angle just went facefirst through the table!!!!!!! Kurt Angle may be dead!!!!!!!!

DD: That would be horrible! Last night he got married, and tonight he's having a funeral!

VJ: This match can only end by bleeding your opponent until he's unconscious! Darkness just tossed Nightmare her purse!

DD: Idiot! It clashes with his ring attire!

VJ: Would you shut up?! Nightmare just pulled something out of…oh God that's a brick!!! Angle is trying to get back to his feet…look out!!!!!! OH MY!!!!!!!!!! Nightmare just threw that brick right at the head of Kurt Angle and the Olympic Bad Ass is down!!!!!

DD: What kind of person carries a brick around in her purse? Vince, she deserves to die!!!!!!

VJ: Be nice! Angle is trying to escape Nightmare. I'm amazed that Angle isn't bleeding. He's crawling up the aisle to escape but Nightmare isn't far behind! Uh oh!!! He's got a crowbar!!! Nightmare is running after Angle with a crowbar…Angle just saw him and he's trying to hightail it out of here!!! Angle is headed backstage and he runs right into a clothesline from Downcast!!!!!!!!! Downcast is back out here and he's beating the living hell out of Angle once again!!!! Oh my God…damn it to Hell! Reaper and Wolverine are back and they're attacking Downcast again!!! Downcast is being double teamed by the L.o.D.!!!

DD: Watch out for Nightmare, guys!!!!

VJ: Nightmare just nailed Reaper with that crowbar!!!!!! Boot to the midsection of Wolverine and he nails him with a modified version of the Light's Out!!!!!! Kurt Angle is climbing the Apocalypse Now set!!! What a damn coward!

DD: Vince, why don't you do something good with your life…like commit suicide. The Olympic Bad Ass fears no one!

VJ: You're full of it tonight. Angle is climbing the Apocalypse Now set and now Nightmare is climbing up after him! The chase is on!!!!! Angle is at the top of the set…that's about 50ft in the air!!! My God and Nightmare is up there with him!!!! Get some help out here!!!

DD: I've got a bad feeling about this, Vince.

VJ: Angle is crawling atop the set to escape his opponent…Nightmare caught him by the tights!!! Angle is trapped!!!! Nightmare picks him up and blasts him with a right hand!!! He nails Angle with another one…WHOA!!!!!!! Angle almost fell off the set!!! Angle is hanging for dear life!!!

DD: Hold on, Kurt!!! Don't fall!!!!

VJ: Nightmare is standing over Kurt Angle and he's laughing. Nightmare…don't do it!!!!! Don't do it…he's stepping on Angle's fingers!!!

DD: Oh Lord!!!!!!!!! (gasping) Oh my heart!!!!!! Hang on Kurt!!!!!!

VJ: Angle's hand slipped and he's hanging on by the other!!! This could be the end of Kurt Angle's X-Treme Title reign!!!!

DD: This could be the end of his life!!! Don't look Jevona!!!

VJ: It looks like Nightmare is having 2^nd thoughts. Oh thank God!!! What sportsmanship on the part of Nightmare to help Kurt Angle up!

DD: Thank you Lord! Thank you very much!

VJ: Nightmare is a class act! He may have just saved Kurt Angle's career by helping him back up there. And Angle is shaking his hand! Whoever said sportsmanship was dead is--SON OF A BITCH NO!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!! KURT ANGLE JUST SHOVED NIGHTMARE 50FT DOWN ONTO THE CONCRETE!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DD: HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! That was great!!!!!! Who is the Olympic Bad Ass????!!

VJ: That son of a bitch may have killed Nightmare!!! Kurt is climbing down from the set…Nightmare hit facefirst into the ground and he's busted wide open!!! Stop the damn match, ref! Stop the match!!!

DD: It's all over for Nightmare. And still your X-Treme Champion…

VJ: Will you shut up??!!! Nightmare is hurt…Darkness walks over to her man…she's crying…Jevona attacks her from behind!!! Jevona is doing a number on Darkness…Total Dispear on the floor!!!! And now here comes this bastard Kurt Angle! He picking up Nightmare…haven't you done enough, Kurt?!

DD: You can never do too much to Devastation.

VJ: Kurt and Jevona are cuffing Nightmare to the guardrail! This is disgusting! Kurt has…those are brass knuckles!!! Kurt has brass knuckles…OH!!! Right to the head of Nightmare!!!! And again!!! Kurt Angle has snapped! Kurt Angle is beating the hell out of Nightmare!!!! Angle is beating Nightmare to a bloody pulp!!!!! Stop the match, damn it!!! Stop the match!!!!!!!

DD: Beat his ass, Kurt!!! Beat his ass!!!!!

VJ: The ref finally gets in there to pull Kurt off of Nightmare. Nightmare is out and now the ref is counting him down…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10!!!!

DD: HAHAHAHA!!!!! Who's the man?!

VJ: Kurt Angle has stolen this match from Nightmare!!! I can't believe what he just did right here and he just hit the referee with those brass knuckles!!! Get some help out here, damn it!! Kurt Angle is attacking Nightmare again!!!! Somebody get him out of here!!!!!! We've got officials and security…Angle is attacking officials too!!!

DD: This is L.o.D. style baby!!!!!! L.o.D.!!!!!!! No Mercy!!!!!

VJ: Angle is attacking Nightmare once again…wait a minute!!! Here comes Total Devastation!!! Shark and Total Devastation is out here to help out their fallen teammate and look at Angle run away like a coward!!!! Kurt Angle is headed back to the locker room with his partners in crime Jevona, Reaper and Wolverine! Sweet Merciful Crap!!!!!

DD: HAHA! Is it safe to say that Nightmare is done for good?

VJ: That was absolutely horrible.

DD: Oh I see what you're saying! It's OK for that filthy, disgusting slut Tina to beat up Trish and kidnap Trish, but when Nightmare falls off of the set it's "absolutely horrible"! You're a damn hypocrite, Vince! A DAMN hypocrite!!!!

VJ: Ladies and gentlemen…get some help for Nightmare, he's hurt bad. (Sighs) On a lighter note, Lightning is gonna face Killa for the World Title here tonight and we've got him backstage right now.

(Lightning is shown taking off his Feel the bolt t-shirt..as the girls in the crowd cheer....Lightning looks up into the camera.)

Lightning: "What the hell is this a peep show, did you see that big wooden door before you came here..

Camera Man: Uh..Sorry Mr. Lightning, I just asumed I could.

Lightning: O, O, You assumed you could just open my door and walk in while im standing here with my shirt off right..

Camera Man: Well I wouldnt quite say that..

Lightning: Ok, Just shut up..Well since you are here..I do have a few things to say.

Camera Man: Ok perfect go ahead and talk..

Lightning: Well thanks for the initation jackass...Anyways FNS alot went down..Staks ran his mouth way to damn long about just about everyone and finally it backfired on him..if hed only learn when to shut his mouth...the Demolitionists reunited again and did what it is we were born to do and thats raise hell and cause a riot..all night we raised hell and then it came down for the Olympic Jackass's wedding, now dont get me wrong it was fun as hell, but I wasnt after Kurt I was after the rest of them jackass's..but Kurt Im sorry I reunied your wedding..Please dont cry. O wait...im not sorry but anyways...Rock...Welcome back..let me think when was the last time I seen you... (thinks)...O yeah thats right..you first got the Lightning Rod then I pinned you 1..2..3..and got back my Ic title..and then you being the jealous roody poo you are tried to give me the peoples elbow or Rock bottom whatever it was..and boom....out came my boy Stone Cold and dropped not 1 but 2 stunners on ya...and eversince no Rock..but welcome back..but did you say something about this being your IC title (Holds up the IC title)...No Rock..this isnt your Ic title...this is my title....as for Viper...its the Revolution's title now..Hell no this isnt noones title but mine and thats the way its going to stay...Tonight is the biggest oppurtunity in my NFWA career, after 5 months of hard work it finally gets to be payed off here tonight..as I for the World Title...Iv said enough about Killa so I dont have to talk anymore crap about him..But I know damn well..that someone is going to try and prevent me from winning that title...so I guess then theres only 1 way to prevent that from happening and thats Eliminate the problem's before it becomes a problem

VJ: Oh my goodness!!! Total Devastation and Downcast are going after the L.o.D.!!!!!!!!

DD: Wait a minute…do they know what happened to Trish?! Where's Trish?!

VJ: I have no idea!

VJ: When did he attack Trish?

VJ: Here he comes!!! Here comes the 1^st ever NFWA Toughman Champion and can you feel the intensity in the air?!?! Look at that cold stare he just gave to Ice Cube!!! Look out! Ice Cube isn't gonna wait for Demp to get into the ring! They're going at it in the aisle!!!!!!

VJ: Demp and Ice Cube are tearing into each other in the aisle! That's how deep the hatred is between these 2 superstars!!! Ice Cube with a knee to the midsection of the champ…right hand to the jaw!!! Ice Cube has Demp by the hair…he tried to slam him into the guardrail but Demp blocks it and connects with a side Russian Leg Sweep on the concrete!!!!

DD: Look at Posidin! He's just sitting back watching this! I think he's scared!

VJ: It's total warfare on the floor between Cube and Demp!!! Demp is waiting for Ice Cube with a cookie sheet…Cube catches him with a right hand to the stomach! Ice Cube battles back to his feet and he and Demp are slugging it out again…wait a minute!!! Posidin is climbing to the top rope…Demp and Ice Cube don't see him…OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!!! Posidin connects with a moonsault from the top rope to the floor on both Demp and Ice Cube!!! Demp and Cube are down and Posidin is going crazy now!!! Posidin picks up that cookie sheet…BOOM! Right to the head of Cube!!!! There's one for Demp!!!!! Posidin has both Demp and Ice Cube by the hair now…

DD: Uh oh!!!!!

VJ: What's he gonna do here…Demp and Ice Cube pick him up and gives him a double suplex into the trashcan!!!!!!!! Did you hear that sickening thud?! Demp nails Ice Cube now…he slams him right into the guardrail!!! Ice Cube charges in at Demp…whoa!!!!!! Back body drop sends Ice Cube flying into the crowd!!! Demp picks up Posidin by the hair…he throws him back into the ring!

DD: You see, Posidin is an idiot, Vince! That little guy has no business being in a grown man's match!

VJ: Stop it!!! Demp just tossed the steel stairs into the ring!!! He's headed in after Posidin…Demp floors him with a right hand!!! There's another one!!! Irish whip by Demp…reversal by Posidin sends Demp hard out of the buckle…OH!!!!! Drop-toe-hold by Posidin sent Demp crashing facefist into the steel stairs!!!!!! Demp is back up…Posidin tosses him a steel chair…he dropkicks the chair right into Demp's face!!!!!! Demp may be out and now Ice Cube is out of the crowd…OH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Posidin with an incredible plancha over the top rope landing right on top of Ice Cube and now he's tearing into him with furious punches!!!!

DD: Posidin has gone crazy!!!!!!

VJ: These 3 men all wanna leave Orlando with the Toughman title, but I think Posidin is being fueled by the attack on his good friend Nightmare just moments ago! Posidin picks up Ice Cube…Irish whip, reversal by Cube sends Posidin crashing into the steel ringpost!!!!!! Ice Cube is measuring Posidin now…BOOM! Big clothesline sends Posidin crashing hard to the floor!!! Ice Cube picks Posidin back up…another Irish whip sends him crashing into the guardrail this time! He has him by the hair…Posidin goes hard into the steel stairs!!

DD: They're getting too close too us, Vince!!! I'm not gonna have a repeat of last night!!!

VJ: Oh shut up! Ice Cube drags Posidin over here and he throws him on top of the North Korean Announce Table!!! Ice Cube is choking Posidin with wires now!!!! He's attempting to choke out the former Light Heavyweight Champ!!! Demp is back up now…he's headed over to Ice Cube and Posidin…no! Demp just picked up an ax from underneath the ring!!!! Come on, this is going too far!!!!

DD: Shut your damn mouth, skankhole!!!!!

VJ: Demp is coming up behind Ice Cube with that ax…no!!!!! Look out Cuhe…OH!!!!!!

DD: Vince, you damn snitch!!!!! Shut your mouth!!!!!

VJ: Thank God Ice Cube turned around at the last second and was able to stop Demp from using that ax!!!!!! Posidin is trying to get off of that table as Demp and Ice Cube wrestle over that ax…OH!! Demp with a low blow on Cube…he picks up Ice Cube and knocks him throat first across the guardrail!!!!! Posidin dives off the table and catches Demp with a huracan…NO!!!!!!!!!! Demp powerbombs him hard off the floor!!!!!!

DD: This match is turning into the Rodney Demp show!!!!! That's a real good way to put a crowd to sleep!

VJ: Why don't you go smoke a blunt or something?! Both Ice Cube and Posidin are down and now the ref is counting them down…1….2…3…4…5…6…7…8…Posidin is moving and so is Ice Cube so the count has stopped!!!!

DD: I don't like that look in Demp's eye!

VJ: Demp is headed over to us…how you doing Rod…(Demp throws Vince down)

DD: HAHHAHAHAHAHHA!!!! That was great!!!!! He shoved Vince right on his fat ass!!!!! You da man Rodney!!!!! You da …

VJ: Delaware Dave is down and now Demp has his chair!!! Posidin is back up…BOOM!!! Demp nails him with a shot that knocks him right back on top of the Korean Announce table and Demp is climbing up there with him!!!!!! What is Demp preparing to do right here…uh oh!!! He's going for the flowing DDT through the table!!!!! Demp is gonna put Posidin right through the table…Posidin is able to shove Demp off…he shoves Demp on top of our announce table…OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! Posidin with a swinging Huracanrana on Demp right on top of our table but the table didn't break!!!!!! The table didn't break…but it might break now!!!!! Ice Cube is on the top rope…OHHHHHHHH! Ice Cube just leapt 15 ft into the air and delivered an elbow drop to both men right through our table!!!!!!! All 3 men are down and they are hurt! I think the back of Cube's head hit off the floor and now the ref is putting the count down…1…2…3…4…Cube is getting back up…5…6…Posidin is moving now! Demp must now beat the count if he wants to retain that title…the ref is up to 7…8…9…Demp is moving!!!!!! The match is still on and Ice Cube is back up! He picks up Demp by the hair and rolls him back into the ring! Ice Cube has Demp set up in the corner…big boots right to the midsection of the Toughman Champ! Irish whip, reversal by Demp sends Ice Cube into the buckle…Demp went for a back drop but got caught…Ice Cube powerbombs him on the steel stairs!!!!!! Demp may be done right here…Posidin just threw a ladder into the ring!!!!!!! Dave get your lazy ass up off the floor! I said get up!!!!!!! Ice Cube picks Demp back up…Demp is bleeding from the back of the head…Irish whip by Cube sends Demp to the ropes…Ice Cube went for the Ice Breaker but Demp caught his leg…Demp spins him around and both men catch that ladder to the face by Posidin!!!!!!! Demp and Ice Cube are both under that ladder and Posidin has a chair…BOOM! He hammering that ladder with that chair!!! Posidin is trying to beat the hell out of Ice Cube and Demp with that chair! Posidin climbs up to the top rope now…what's he about to do…OH!!! Picture perfect moonsault on the ladder, Demp and Ice Cube!!!!! Posidin looks like he's ready to hit the Tidal Wave!!!!!!

DD: (Getting back up) What happened?

VJ: Demp beat your ass.

DD: OK. He may have won this round, but next time I'm doing it Delaware style! There ain't nothing he can do!!!!!

VJ: OK, shut up! Posidin picks up Demp and now he sets him up on the top rope…he's about to finish the champ off…OH!!! Ice Cube from behind just bashed Posidin in the back of the head with that chairshot!!!! Posidin doesn't know where he is…BOOM! He walked right into the Ice Breaker!!!!!!! Ice Cube just told the ref to count him down…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10!!!!!!

DD: HA! Tonight just isn't Total Devastation's night, is it?

VJ: Posidin was unable to make that count so now it's down to Demp and Ice Cube. Demp is still sitting up on the top rope and Cube is going up after him…oh! Demp with a thumb to the eye of Ice Cube…Demp hits a tornado DDT that drops Cube headfirst on top of that steel chair!!!!!!! That may be the end for Ice Cube…Demp goes for the cover but there are no pins!!!!

DD: Dumb ass!!!!!!

VJ: You keep that up and he'll give you another flowing DDT. Demp drags Cube over to the corner and he's choking him with his boot! Demp goes back and picks up that ladder…he just laid that ladder right on the face of Cube…Demp dropkicks the ladder right into the face of Ice Cube!!!!! Ice Cube may be out right there…the ref is counting him down…1…2…3…4…5…he's moving at 5!!!!!!! What a match we've got right here!!!! Ice Cube is getting back to his feet and Demp is waiting for him…boot to the stomach by Demp…Flowing DDT is countered by Cube…German Suplex sends Demp's head bouncing hard off of the mat!!!!!! No bridge, all impact!!!! Demp may be out…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…Demp is moving at 8!!!!!!

DD: These 2 idiots don't know when to quit!

VJ: It's called courage! It's called bravery!

DD: It's called stupidity! They're both nothing but inbred bastards and I could kick their asses any day of the week!!!!

VJ: Sure you could. Ice Cube just walked over to the timekeeper's table…oh no! He's got a sledgehammer!!!!!!

DD: He's gonna turn Demp into a railroad spike!

VJ: Ice Cube is in the ring with a sledgehammer…he's gonna bash Demp's brains in!!! Don't do it…don't…OH NO!!!!! Demp just pulled out a pair of salad tongs and goes low on Ice Cube!!!!!!

DD: OH NO!!!!!! Demp just tossed Ice Cube's salad!!!!!

VJ: Shut your mouth!!!!! Ice Cube is writhing in pain…Demp drives him hard to the mat with an inverted DDT!!!! Demp has that sledgehammer now…he's waiting for Ice Cube to get up! He wants to finish this off!!! Ice Cube is slowly getting back up to his feet…Demp swings the sledgehammer but Cube moved…Cube goes for the Ice Breaker but Demp ducks…OH!!!!!!!!!!!!

DD: What the hell?!

VJ: Both men are down!!!!!! Demp nailed Ice Cube right in the head with that sledgehammer but caught an Ice Breaker on the jaw at the same time!!!!! They may both be out cold…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10!!!!!!

DD: Double countout???! Bullsh*t!!!!!!

VJ: Neither man was able to make the referees count and this match has ended in a draw!!!!!

DD: A Draw?! That's worse than kissing Vince Johnson's sister!!!!!

VJ: Leave my sister out of this!!!!!! Demp and Ice Cube are still down after this match…we've got EMT's and officials attending to both men…this is bad!!!!

DD: You're damn right this is bad!!!!! Those clumsy bastards…how can you have a double KO?!!!

VJ: Well it happened. That was a spectacular match anyway. Well ladies and gentlemen, the Towering Inferno match between Anarchy and Scarlet KV is up next!!! This is gonna be an unbelievable wa…

VJ: Wait a minute!!! I thought they left!!!!!

DD: Yeah, well everyone knows your dumb ass can't think in the 1^st place! Nobody outsmarts the Legion of Destruction.

VJ: I don't know what to say about that. Why did they come back?! What happened to Downcast and Total Devastation???! Ladies and gentlemen, let's show you the history between Anarchy and Scarlet KV!!!!

DD: Oh no!!!!!!! It's the Professional!!!!!!!

VJ: He said that if he didn't find out who was trying to kill him by tonight that the NFWA would have hell to pay!!! What will he do tonight??!

DD: I'm getting goosebumps Vince! Feel my arm!

VJ: No!

DD: Come on! Take a feel!

VJ: Anarchy steps into the Cell and here we go!

DD: Sure you don't wanna feel it?

VJ: The Cell is locked and…oh my! The cage is catching on fire!!!!! I've never seen anything like this before!!!!! Scarlet KV has that handblade on!!!

DD: Look out Anarchy!!!!

VJ: Scarlet KV charges at him with that handblade but Anarchy sidesteps him…Anarchy with a right hand…OH!!! He throws Scarlet KV right into the flames!!!!! Scarlet KV is on fire and Anarchy is loving it!

DD: Burn, baby, burn!!!!!!

VJ: Scarlet KV is on fire and there's nothing anybody can do about it until the cage is turned off! Anarchy with a kick to the ribs of Scarlet!!!! And there's another one!!! Anarchy picks up that bag that KV brought in with him…he's got a crowbar!! KV is rolling around on the ground trying to put that fire out…Anarchy picks Scarlet KV back up…Irish whip, Scarlet reverses and sends Anarchy face first into the flaming Cell!!! Scarlet KV with a clothesline to the back of the head sends Anarchy into the flaming cell once again!! He picks Anarchy up…sidewalk slam drives him hard into the concrete!!!! Anarchy is hurt and he's hurt badly!

DD: He knocked the salami out of Anarchy!

VJ: Scarlet KV is gonna try and get to that lever now!!!!! He's trying to climb the cell..oh no, he burned his hand!

DD: What an idiot! Get up Anarchy!!!

VJ: Anarchy is slow to get up after that sidewalk slam! He's got blood pouring from his mouth and his nose…he may be bleeding internally! Anarchy walks over to Scarlet KV…Scarlet with a left hand jab caught him on the side of the head! KV with a knife-edge chop…he hurt his burnt hand!!!!! Anarchy grabs KV's arm…OH NO!!!! He just threw that burnt hand back into the fire!!!!!! What kind of a sadistic bastard is he?! Once again Anarchy threw his hand back into the fire!!!!! He picks Scarlet KV up…

DD: Get ready Vince! We're getting ready to see an old-fashioned, Anarchy style weenie roast!!!!! OH!!!!!!! HAHAHAHA!

VJ: Anarchy drives KV's back into the flaming cell…he drives his back into another side of the cell…BIG POWERSLAM ON THE CONCRETE BY ANARCHY!!!!!!!! He busted him in half!!!!!! There are no pinfalls, once again…uh oh! Anarchy just spotted that bag of Scarlet KV's.

DD: Well it's the holiday season, so Anarchy might as well help himself to a few toys!

VJ: He opens the bag…oh no!!!! Anarchy has frying pan!!! Meanwhile Scarlet KV is writhing in pain on the ground…Anarchy is about to give him a shot with that frying pan…WHAM!!!!!! Right to the back of the head!!!!!

DD: If Scarlet had brains they would've been knocked out right there!

VJ: Anarchy has just blasted Scarlet KV with a frying pan! He may have a concussion…there's a shot to the top of the head and KV goes down! Anarchy is headed up…he's gonna climb…no wait a minute! He just pulled out some gloves. Anarchy just put those gloves on and now he's making the climb. Anarchy is climbing to the top of the Cell. He's gonna get the lever and it's gonna be over! Scarlet KV is trying to get up there after him but he's far behind! Anarchy is almost at the lever! Can he reach it…

DD: Come on! You're almost there…NO!!!!!!

VJ: Anarchy's leg is on fire!!!!!!! Anarchy's leg was caught in the flames and Anarchy drops 15ft down onto the hard concrete!!!!!!

DD: Somebody get the man some water!!!!

VJ: Anarchy is beating his leg with that bag to put that fire out…KV has the handblade and he stabs Anarchy in the leg!!!!!

DD: What the f*ck is wrong with him?!

VJ: Anarchy stabbed Anarchy in the leg with that handblade…KV with a boot to the midsection…he takes Anarchy over with a suplex!!!!!!

DD: This isn't fair!!! He stabbed Anarchy!!!! How can he do that?!

VJ: Anything goes in this match. Anarchy knew what he was getting into when he asked for this match!

DD: Yeah, he knew he was gonna have to deal with fire. He didn't say anything about knives and handblades!!!

VJ: Scarlet KV mounts Anarchy…he's trying to stab him in the face! This is going a little too far!

DD: Oh, but I thought it was OK to go in there and try to chop your opponent's head off!

VJ: I never said that.

DD: Lying whore!

VJ: That's enough out of you! Scarlet KV is trying to get at Anarchy with that handblade but Anarchy is trying to hold him off…he's getting close to his throat!!!!! He's trying to slit Anarchy's…low blow by Anarchy and Scarlet KV goes down! Anarchy is hurt badly…he can barely walk because of that stab wound. He just picked up KV…Doomsday Drop on the concrete!!!!!! Anarchy just laid KV out with the Doomsday Drop!!!!!! This one could be all over…no! Anarchy is picking KV back up…he's going for it again…Doomsday Drop!!!!!!

DD: Yeah!!!! Beat the snot out of him!

VJ: Anarchy picks up Scarlet KV again…he just picked him up over his shoulder!!!!! Anarchy is holding Scarlet KV over his shoulder…LOOK OUT!!!!!!! OH NO!!!!!!!! he just darted Scarlet KV headfirst into the flames!!!!!! Scarlet KV is burning!!!!! Scarlet KV is burning!

DD: Stick a fork in his ass, he's WELL DONE!!!!!!

VJ: You're hideous! Anarchy is trying to climb the cell once again…he's getting close to the lever…can he reach it…yes!!!!!

DD: Vince, get out your marshmallows!!!!

VJ: Anarchy has barbecued Scarlet KV in an incredible battle! I can't believe this match…and Anarchy still has to fight for the I-C Title later tonight! The Cell is turned off and Anarchy walks out triumphantly…we need some help for KV out here!!!! Ladies and gentlemen, up next is Leather Strap Match! It's the Rock Vs Rick Bruiser for the #1 Contendership for the I-C Title! Let's show you what led up to this battle!

KT: I'm back here with Rick Bruiser and the Revolution and I have to say that I'm disgusted with the Revolution.

Bruiser: (laughs) What?!

KT: That's right. Professionalism aside, we at NFWA HQ were worried sick about you guys! I mean, we hear that you've been in an accident, I heard you were in a coma and for you to use all of that to sucker the Rock into a match isn't just wrong, it's downright disgusting!!!!!

Kaos: Who the hell do you think you are?!

KT: I'm Kevin Taylor!

Bruiser: Yeah, and you're gonna be dead if you ever think of talking to us like that again! Let me set you straight, NOBODY tells the Rev what to do! Not Prez Firestorm, not Commish Sniper, not anybody in the back, nobody! We do what we want, when we want and if you have a problem with us faking the car accident well then tough sh*t cuz there ain't nothing you can do to stop us! Now as for the People's Bitch…

Bruiser: Need something?

Pro: What was that you just said to him? I didn't quite hear it the first time! Could you say it again?

Bruiser: OK, we do what we want…

Pro: No, not that part. Before that?

Bruiser: Huh?

Pro: What did you just say to Mr. Taylor, here!

Bruiser: Well if you must know, I said he'd be dead if he ever…

VJ: OH!!! What in the World???!!! The Professional just bashed Bruiser in the head with a lead pipe!!!!!

DD: He's gone crazy again, Vince!!!!! Call the white coats!

VJ: Kaos is holding Pro's arms and Kaos picks up that lead pipe…OH!!!! Pro moved out of the way and Viper nailed Kaos with that pipe!!!!!! Professional with a DDT on Viper!!!! We've got officials back there! Professional's investigation for the real killer has begun!!!!!

DD: That was O.J., pisshole!!!!!!

VJ: He's investigating something! And you're disgusting!!!!

DD: Now they don’t expect Bruiser to wrestle after what the Professional just did to him, do they?

VJ: Apparently the Professional thinks that Bruiser is the one who's been threatening to kill him. Whether that's true or not I don't know!

DD: Hell, I'm threatening to kill the Pro!

VJ: Don't say that…

DD: He gets within 15 ft of this announce table and I'm getting out Old Betsy and that sucka will eat lead!!!!! Ya hear that Vince? LEAD!!!!!! How ya like me now?!

VJ: Idiot.

DD: This is a strap match!!!! How can the match start without the strap???!

VJ: The Rock isn't wasting any time! He picks up Bruiser and he's hammering away with vicious right hands to the jaw…Rock laying the Smack Down!!!!!!

DD: Get out of there Ricky!!!!!!!

VJ: Bruiser is trying to escape the Rock it looks like…Rock grabs him by the hair and throws Bruiser right into the steel stairs!!!! The referee is over there telling Rock that he has to put the strap…ROCK JUST NAILED THE REF!!!!!!!!

DD: What the hell?! That's a DQ and you know it, Vince!!!!!!!

VJ: The Rock picks up that leather strap…OH!! He's whipping Bruiser with it!!!! Rock is beating the life out of Rick Bruiser with that strap…here comes the rest of the Rev!!!!!

DD: The Rock is running!!!!! Look at the coward run!!!!!

VJ: Yeah, he ran right through Kaos and Viper with a double clothesline!!!!! The Rock has that strap again and he's whipping them now!!!!! The Rock is tearing the skin off of Viper's back…Kaos catches him in the side of the head with an elbow! Kaos is hammering away on the Rock…Irish whip by Kaos…Rock reverses and sends him crashing into the ringpost!!!!! Rock is headed back to the ring…Bruiser nails him with an axehandle from behind!!!!! Kaos drops the elbow to the back of the Rock! Come on!!!! The Rock is having to face 2 men!!!

DD: Vince you're so stupid! You and I both know that Bruiser is only half a man!

VJ: That's for sure!

DD: No, you missed it.

VJ: Kaos and Bruiser are dragging the Rock over here…they're right back to the Korean Announce table again! Bruiser just picked up a coffee mug and he's gonna hit the Rock with it…OH!!! Spinebuster!!!!! The Rock just drilled Bruiser with a spinebuster and he snatches the mug!!!!

DD: What the crook! OH NO!!!!!!!

VJ: Rock just shattered that mug over the head of Kaos and he falls back onto the table! The Rock climbs up there with him…don't tell me!

DD: No!!!!! Not to Korea!!!!!

VJ: ROCK BOTTOM THROUGH THE KOREAN ANNOUNCE TABLE ON KAOS!!!!!!!! Kaos is down!!!!!!! The announcers are down!!!! The Rock is getting back up…Bruiser wraps that strap around his throat!!!! Bruiser is trying to choke out the Rock with that strap!!!!! The Rock is fading!!!!!! The Rock is going out like a light. We've got another referee back in and Bruiser tosses the Rock back into the ring. I think…I think the Rock is out!

DD: Well good for him!!!!!

VJ: Bruiser must now drag Rock to all 4 turnbuckles in order to win this. He wraps that strap around the neck of the Rock…this isn't right!

DD: HAHA! He's gonna hang him!

VJ: Bruiser has the other end of the strap around the neck of the Rock and…OH NO! He's dragging him by his throat!!!! Come on!!!! Get in there and stop this, ref!

DD: He ain't gonna do nothing! This is anything goes!

VJ: Just about EVERY match here tonight is anything goes! Bruiser touches 1 turnbuckle and he's dragging the Rock to a 2^nd…he got it!!!! He's going for the 3^rd…Bruiser touches the 3^rd turnbuckle!!!

DD: We're headed for the home stretch! Say goodnight to the Brahma Bull!!!!!

VJ: Bruiser's almost there…NO! The Rock is holding onto the strap to keep Bruiser from getting the final turnbuckle! We've got a tug of war in there!

DD: Kick him in the nuts, Bruiser!

VJ: I think he heard you! He tried to kick the Rock downstairs but Rocky caught the foot…dragon screw leg whip by the Rock…he's got the Sharpshooter locked in on Bruiser!!!!!! The Sharpshooter on Bruiser!!!!! Bruiser is screaming in pain!!!!!

DD: The Rock has gone crazy, Vince! He still has that strap around his neck!

VJ: Bruiser is trying hard to break this hold! The Rock has it locked in tight…Bruiser pulls on the strap and he's choking the Rock!!!!!!! The Rock's face is turning red and the sharpshooter is broken!!!! Come on, ref! Get that strap from around his neck!!!!!!! Bruiser is climbing back to his feet and he pulls the Rock up by that strap!!!!!

DD: HAHA! He's walking the Rock like he's the People's Bitch!

VJ: Bruiser is once again dragging the Rock around the ring by his neck!!!! Bruiser grabs one end of the strap…the Rock grabs the other…OH!!!!!! He just pulled Bruiser into a clothesline and he goes down! And yes! The Rock is finally able to get that strap from around his neck!

DD: Look out Rick! He's loose!

VJ: The Brahma Bull is fired up!! Bruiser back to his feet…Rock with a boot followed by a vicious DDT!!!!! He dropped Rick Bruiser right on his head!!!!! Viper is on the ring apron now…BOOM!! The Rock nails him with a right hand that sends him flying into the guardrail! Bruiser is back to his feet now…he tries for a clothesline but the Rock counters into a Samoan Drop!!!!! The Rock has put Bruiser down and now he's gonna try and end it! The Rock walks over to the 1^st turnbuckle…he hits it!!!!! He's trying for the 2^nd turnbuckle now…he got it!!!!!

DD: Do something Rick!!!! Do something!!!!!

VJ: Since when did you become friends with Bruiser? The Rock is headed for the 3^rd turnbuckle…Bruiser is trying to keep the Rock from reaching it but the Rock is holding on!!!! The Rock is trying to get it…Bruiser charges at the Rock and smashes him into the 3^rd buckle with an avalanche…Hot Shot by Bruiser put the Rock down!!!!!! Bruiser has succeeded in stopping the Rock's run…who will be the #1 contender for the I-C Title?!

DD: I'm picking Bruiser!

VJ: You would! Bruiser is back up and he backs the Rock into the buckle…Irish whip…Rock reverses and catches Bruiser…belly to belly suplex!!!! The Rock just took that strap off his arm!

DD: Disqualify him!!!!

VJ: Bruiser is back up and the Rock nails him with a slam!!!!!

DD: Look out, Vince! It's the most electrifying move in sport-entertainment…the People's Elbow!!!!

VJ: The Rock tosses the elbow pad…he signals for the elbow! Rock hits off 1 side…he hits off the other side…Rock connects with the elbow right into the heart of Rick Bruiser!!!! The Rock may have it won right here but I don't think he's finished!!! The Rock is picking Bruiser back up…

DD: Ref, make Rock put the strap on!!!!!

VJ: The Rock has Bruiser set up for a Rock Bottom! The Rock is setting up for a…OH! Bruiser nails him in the head with an elbow! Boot to the midsection by Bruiser…he's going for the Ripper…NO! Rock with a double leg takedown…low blow on Bruiser!!!!! The Rock hits off the ropes…he connects with a swinging neckbreaker!!!! The Rock is cooking!!!! Can you smell it, Dave?

DD: Yeah, I can smell it! It smells like the biggest pile of Brahma bullsh*t I've ever smelled in my life! I've never seen anybody cheat the way the Rock is right now!

VJ: The Rock is now wrapping that strap around the throat of Bruiser!!! Turnabout is fair play! The Rock is pulling on that strap and it looks like Bruiser's eyes are about to pop out of his head!!!!! The Rock drags him over to the corner…he tags the 1^st corner! Bruiser just grabbed onto the top rope and he's trying to stop the Rock from moving…Rock kicks Bruiser in the stomach and he drags him onto the 2^nd corner! Rock is pulling him over to the 3^rd corner…he hits it again!!! Can the Rock get that last buckle! Can he become the #1 contender for the I-C Title! Bruiser is trying his best to fight it…we've got another tug of war…Rock charges at Bruiser but misses with a clothesline…there's the Ripper!!!!!! Bruiser hit the Ripper! He's back to his feet and he tags that turnbuckle pad…

VJ: What?! How can that be?! Bruiser only tagged 1 turnbuckle!!!!!

DD: It's a miracle, Vince!!!!

VJ: I smell a rat!!!!!

DD: That's just the Rock's breath! Get that bitch a tic tac and get him the hell out of the Dave's ring because he got his ass beat!!!!!

VJ: The Rock is back up and he's arguing with the ref…the ref just said that Bruiser tagged the turnbuckles behind the Rock's back! We've got an instant replay of that…let's take a look right here!

DD: There you have it, Johnson! Bruiser walked out to the People's ring, went 1 on 1 with the People's Champ, and used the Ripper to kick the People's Ass! I love it!!!!! What in the world?!

VJ: The Rock just snapped on Bruiser!!! The Rock is attacking Bruiser!!!!! He backs him to the corner and is burying boots right to the midsection…here come Kaos and Viper once again…they're double teaming the Rock!!!!!

DD: Serves him right! Beat him like the stepchild that he is!

VJ: The Revolution is doing a number on the Rock once again and look at Bruiser taking advantage! What a no good bastard he turned out to be! Kaos and Viper are holding the Rock for Bruiser…Bruiser just went to the floor and got a chair!!!

DD: Bruiser got STEEL, Vince!!!!!

VJ: Bruiser is gonna try and take The Rock's head off with that chair…don't do it!!!!! No!!!!!

DD: My God Vince, what the hell is that?!

VJ: It's the Professional!!!!! The Professional is on his way from the locker room with a steel chair and listen to this crowd go crazy!!!!!! The Professional hits the ring with that chair…WHAM!!!!! He just floored Kaos again!!!! Down goes Viper again!!!! Bruiser attacks him from behind!!!!!

DD: Not this time, Pro!!!!

VJ: Bruiser is hammering away with right hands to the back of the head of the Pro! He's gonna give him the Ripper…OH NO!!!!!!! Rock is back up and he nailed Bruiser in the back of the head with that chairshot…Rock Bottom on Bruiser and he goes down!!!!! Bruiser and the Revolution are retreating!!!

DD: I can't believe this idiot Pro! Who in the world does he think he is!

VJ: The Professional and the Rock have just cleared the ring of the Revolution…what's this now? The Professional is having words with the People's Champ. We've got trouble in the ring here…

DD: Knock his brains out, Pro!

VJ: Stop trying to start trouble! The Rock and the…sweet merciful crap!!!!! The Professional just nailed the Rock right in the head with that chair!!! Boot to the midsection…PILEDRIVER ON THE CHAIR!!!!! The Pro just laid out the Rock! The Rock is down!!!! We've got security out here trying to get the Professional away from the ring!

DD: Well at least this idiot Professional is good for something! I hope we never…what the…?!!!!

VJ: The Professional is headed over here now!!!!! Pro just slapped Dave in the head!!!!! Officials are trying to get the Professional out of here! He just tried to get a piece of Delaware Dave!!!! Professional wants a piece of Dave!!!!

DD: You tell him to bring it! The Daveness backs down from nobody!!!!!

VJ: The officials just let the Pro go and he's headed for Dave again!!!!

DD: (Running away) I didn't mean it! Vince help!!!!!

VJ: Security grabs the Professional again…(Pro takes a swing at Vince) hey! Watch yourself!!!!!

DD: (Hiding behind Vince) He's crazy!!!!!

Kurt: Can you guys believe how stupid Downcast and Shark are?

Reaper: I know what you mean!

Wolverine: Hello?

Prez (On the phone): Hey, Wolvie?

Wolverine: Yeah.

Prez: How's everything going?

Wolverine: Everything's great! You're missing out on all of the fun!

Prez: Don't worry, I get to throw Sniper off a roof. What's more fun than that?!

Wolverine: I don't know…throwing Hogan off of a roof?

Prez: Well…nothings more fun than that. I just wanted to make sure everything's in place for the big plan tonight? You got all the loose ends tied up!

Wolverine: Yeah!

Prez: How's Trish doing?

Wolverine: (pauses) I don't know. How is she doing?

Prez: (Sighs) If I knew, why would I be asking you. Let me talk to her.

Wolverine: Isn't she with you?

Prez: Wolverine…where's Trish?

Wolverine: Hey Kurt, you seen Trish?

Kurt: I thought she left with Firestorm.

Reaper: Me too!

Prez: What the f*ck is wrong with you guys?! You saw what happened to her last night!

Wolverine: Calm down!

Prez: If anything happens to Trish you're all gonna be sorry! I want you to find her now!!!!!!!! (Hangs up)

DD: Oh my God, Vince! They still don't know what happened to Trish!!!! Damn that slut Tina!!!!

VJ: Up next we've got the Dream Tag Team match! The 3 time NFWA Tag Team Champions the Elites do battle with the former 2 time Tag Team Champs, the Side Show Freaks. For those of you that don't know about the Side Show Freaks, watch this!

DD: Vince, that video licked ass and you know it!

VJ: Huh?

DD: Shut up! They should call this a nightmare match cuz both these teams are the biggest wastes of space in the history of the NFWA! I hope they beat each other to death!!!

VJ: Killa and Demp are doing a number on the big Avenger…Midget Clown just jumped on the leg of Demp…oh no!!! It's the dreaded ankle bite of death!!!!! All is lost for Demp!!!!

DD: you've gotta be kidding me!

VJ: Demp is in pain…OH! Killa just kicked Clown in the back of the head! Midget Clown hits off the ropes…Demp tries for a clothesline but can't bend down that low! Clown jumps on the back of Killa and bites his neck!!!!! He's biting the neck of Killa!!!

DD: You know what, I'm actually rooting for the Elites in this one! Killa needs to grab that wannabe leprechaun Midget Clown and beat the Lucky Charms out of his ass!!!!

VJ: Killa with a jawbreaker just sent Clown to the mat!!!! Avenger misses the Elites with a double clothesline…double boot by Killa and Demp…Double DDT and the big man went down like a tree!!!!! Clown takes another dives at Killa but he's caught…uh oh!!!!! This doesn't look good for Clown! Look out Dave!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!

DD: HAHAHAHA! Look at that idiot fly!!!!!

VJ: Killa just launched Midget Clown over the top rope right into the steel guardrail and into the crowd!!!! Clown may be dead!!!

DD: Do I get his pot of gold?

VJ: Stop it! Come on ref! Make it 1 on 1!!!! Killa and Demp are double teaming the mighty Avenger in the corner!!! Avenger probably doesn't even know where he is!

DD: When does he ever know where he is?

VJ: That's a good point! The ref is trying to get Killa out of the ring! Killa's finally out of there and it's down to Rodney and Avenger!!! Rodney…

DD: What the hell is that idiot doing?!

VJ: Demp is slaming his head into the turnbuckle!!!!!!

DD: I didn't think it was possible but we've actually found somebody more retarded than Avenger…and he's not from Canada!!!!

VJ: (Gives Dave a mean look) Demp charges in at Avenger and runs right into a big boot by the big man!!!!! Avenger is stomping away on Rodney Demp now! He picks him back up…big chop to the chest by Avenger! Irish whip sends Demp bouncing hard off the buckle…Avenger charges in…Demp moves out of the way!!!! He rolls over and makes the tag to his partner Killa! Killa and Demp both come up behind Avenger…double belly to back suplex!!!! This whole arena just shook! Killa makes the cover...1…2…it's broken up by Clown!!!! Clown is hammering away with right hands to the back of the head of Killa…

DD: Get ready for another launching Vince!

VJ: Killa picks Clown up…look at the strength advantage Killa has over Midget Clown!!! OH!!!!!! He tosses Clown high into the…GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY!!!!!!!! Clown caught Killa's head on the way down and brought him over the top rope with an amazing huracanrana!!!!! What a move by the Clown!!!!

DD: Don't come over here, you idiots!!!! (Puts his hand on his gun) It's loaded!

VJ: Will you shut up?! Killa's head bounced hard off the floor and he may be out…nevermind cuz he's getting back up! Killa staggers into the Chinese Announce Table…Clown climbs to the ring apron…OH NO!! He went for a somersault senton on Killa but was caught in midair…Killa powerbombs Clown right on top of the Chinese Announce table but it doesn't break!!!!

DD: It might break now! Watch that jackoff Demp!

VJ: Demp just climbed to the ring apron with that steel chair!!!!! He's gonna try to…son of a bitch he knocked his head off!!!!! Avenger just connected with a big boot to that chair and damn near decapitated the Toughman Champ!!!!! And now…what the hell is Avenger doing?!

DD: That idiot is going to the top rope!!!!! He thinks he's some kind of Superhero!!!!

VJ: This crowd is coming to it's feet! Avenger is up on the top rope…

Avenger: UP, UP AND AWAY!!!!!!!

VJ: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! The 300-plus pound Avenger just dove from the top rope right into a chairshot by Killa!!!!!!

DD: HAHAHA! That was better than Kryponite!!!!!

VJ: Look at Clown! He just jumped onto the back of Killa once again…Killa lifts him high into the air and tosses him back into the ring! The ref goes to the floor to check on Avenger and Demp…they're both down…Clown just bit 1 of Killa's fingers!!! Killa tries to kick Midget Clown in the face but he catches his leg…EWWWWWW!!!!!!!!

DD: Oh my God!!!!! Vince…tell me he didn't just…

VJ: I refuse to call that move!

DD: He bit his balls!!!!!!!!

VJ: I can't…

DD: Can you believe he bit his balls?! Oh my God Vince…he bit his balls!!!!

VJ: I heard you the 1^st time! Killa is pissed off…

DD: He won't be pissing straight for a week after that move!

VJ: Killa is chasing Midget Clown around the ring…Clown slides to the floor…OH NO!!! Jiggly Steve with a bowling pin to the brain of Killa!!! Clown climbs to the top rope…there's the midget sault!

DD: The what?!

VJ: Jiggly Steve throws the ref into the ring…it's over…1…2…thr..uh uh!!!!!! Almost! Not quite! Killa is still in this match!

DD: Well his balls are in Midget Clown's belly!

VJ: Will you shut up about the balls???! Clown is trying to think of anything he can to get the win over…oh no! Jiggly Steve just pulled out the flaming torches! We've seen them before!

DD: We saw roasted KV earlier, and now it looks like we're about to get some Kentucky Fried Demp!

VJ: Avenger and Demp are moving on the floor now…Demp picks up Avenger for the flowing DDT…Avenger with an elbow to the midsection and he grabs Demp by the throat…look out!!!!!! OH!!!!!!!! Chokeslam through the table on Demp!!!!!

DD: Demp is done!!!!!!!

VJ: Avenger is climbing back into the ring…I think the ref forgot this was a tag match! Killa is back to his feet and he gets mowed down with a lariat!!!! Avenger picks up Killa…he's setting him up for a powerbomb…NO!!! Killa with a low blow! He backs Avenger to the buckle and he mounts him in 10 count position…

DD: Oh no!!!

VJ: Here we go…1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…OH!! Avenger tosses Killa over the top and he hits facefirst off of the stairs!!!!

DD: He knocked his face off! He had to!!!!

VJ: Killa is hurt…that's a bad thing to have happen on the same night he defends the World Title against Lightning! Wait…did you hear that?! Jiggly Steve just told Avenger to distract the ref!!!!

DD: Avenger can't even spell distract!

VJ: Neither can you! Avenger is trying to distract the…what the hell is he doing? Avenger is rolling around on the mat tickling himself…looks like he's having fun.

DD: Hey, get a room! Freak!

VJ: You've got real problems! Do you know that? The ref is trying to see is Avenger is OK…Lord knows I hope he is! Wait a minute…Steve just ran at Killa with that torch…Killa just floored Steve with a right hand!!!!! Midget Clown runs over to Killa…OH NO!!!!!! Killa just threw that torch right into the face of Midget Clown!!!!! He just burned Midget Clown!!!! Good Lord!!!! Avenger just grabbed Killa by the hair and lifts him high into the air…Press Slam!!!!!!! Avenger has lost it! Midget Clown has been hurt by Killa and Avenger has snapped on Killa! He Irish Whips Killa into the buckle…BOOM!! He nails him with an Avalanche!!! He may have shattered his rib cage!!!

DD: Hey Avenger, turn around you idiot!

VJ: Demp is in the ring…boot to the stomach of Avenger…FLOWING DDT!!!!!! He just spiked the big man!!!!!! Avenger is out!!!

DD: Aww man! He may have actually knocked some sense into that idiot!

VJ: Demp rolls to the floor and he picks up Midget Clown…is Clown crying!

DD: I think he needs a diaper change!

VJ: Killa is back up and he picks Clown up…don't do it!!!! You'll snap him in half!!!!! OH!!!!!!!!! Takeover on Midget Clown!!!!! This match is all over!!!! He hooks the leg…1…2…3!!!!!

VJ: What a match that was!!!!!!

DD: I'll say! Now we NEVER have to see those bastard ass Freaks in my fed again!

VJ: Can't you be nice for 5 minutes?

DD: It's not in my contract!

VJ: OK! That was a big win by the Elites…and now many people can say that the Elites are the greatest Tag Team in the NFWA! But tonight Killa isn't done as he will do battle with Lightning later on tonight for the World Title, but up next…

DD: Oh yeah!!! Nobody messes with Trish and gets away with it!!!

Kurt: Where's Trish??!!!

Tina: F*ck off Kurt!!!

Kurt: You're gonna tell us where Trish is or else!

Tina: Or else what?!

VJ: Come on! It's 3 men against a woman!!!!!

DD: Yeah, but she had no business putting her hands on Trish earlier!!!

VJ: These are some real tough guys! They're gonna beat up on a woman! Wait a minute!!!!!! It's the Riot Makerz!!!!! Ice Cube and Rage just nailed Wolverine and Angle from behind…Tina with a low blow on Reaper!!! Ice Cube just broke 1 of those 2X4's over the back of Reaper!!!

DD: This isn't fair! This is none of their business!

VJ: Ice Breaker on Reaper and Rage just bashed Wolverine in the back of the head with a trashcan!!!! Tina is running away and Angle is chasing after her! Angle is chasing Tina out to the parking lot…what in the world?! It’s the 9^th St. Posse!!!!! The Posse is here!!! The Posse is here and they're attacking Angle!!!

DD: Is Tina in cahoots with the Posse?!

VJ: I don't know but she got out of there quick! Angle, Fredo and Jamal are holding Angle down and here comes Sniper!!

Sniper: You know what Kurt, next time you talk to Firestorm I want you to give him a message!

VJ: OH!! Sniper just nailed Angle right in the head with a blackjack! Sniper is beating the hell out of Kurt Angle!!! Angle has been busted wide open!!! I can't believe this!

DD: Sniper has lost his mind too! Everybody's going crazy tonight!

VJ: Sniper just told the Posse to let Angle go…boot to the stomach…Sniper Bomb on the ground!!! Sniper has just destroyed Angle!

Sniper: Angle, when you talk to Firestorm, you let him know that's what's coming for him!!!!!

DD: Uh oh! This is gonna be good!

VJ: Lightning and the Professional are having a staredown! The Pro has been on a rampage searching for the man who's been trying to kill him…it's getting pretty heated…

DD: HAHA! Pro knocked Lightning on his ass!!!!

VJ: We've got officials trying to get in between Lightning and the Pro…Lightning spears the Professional into the wall and he's hammering him with right hands!!! Lightning and the Professional are trying to kill one another!!! Security is trying to split them up…

DD: Get out of the way and let them fight!

VJ: It's pandemonium back there!!!

VJ: We've lost our lights…

DD: Vince, tell you mom to stop playing with the lights!

VJ: Shut up!

VJ: Well here we go!!! The I-C Title is up for grabs as well as the TV title for the 1^st runner up. It's Rage starting off against Big Foot now…there's the lockup!!! Big Foot using his strength and weight advantage to drive Rage to the buckle…the ref is asking for the break…whoa! Clean break by Big Foot!

DD: What a punk! I wanna see Big Foot and Lightning fight!

VJ: Rage is talking smack…OH!!! Big Foot just smacked him right in the talk…I mean the mouth!

DD: Idiot!

VJ: Rage spit right in the face of Big Foot!!!!! Big Foot tried to nail him with a right hand but Rage moves…Rage connects on the jaw with rights and lefts to the side of the head! Irish whip by Rage…reversal by Big Foot sends Rage to the ropes…Lightning buries the knee to the small of the back of Rage!!!!!! Rage turns around and nails the I-C Champ…Big Foot catches him from behind…OH!!! Reverse DVD almost snapped the neck of Rage!!!!! He makes the cover…1…2…kickout by Rage!!!

DD: Oh, I see what this is gonna be like! Lightning and his gang are gonna try to work together to screw Anarchy and Rage!

VJ: You calling Big Foot, a gang?!

DD: Yes!

VJ: OK. Rage is getting back to his feet…he nails Big Foot right in the face with a right hand! There's a boot to the stomach! Rage with a dropkick sends Big Foot to the buckle but doesn't knock him off his feet!!!

DD: What's wrong with this idiot! Fall! Fall!

VJ: Rage charges at Big Foot but he's caught by the throat…WHOA!!!! Big Foot tosses Rage back to the corner and he's hammering away to the midsection with rights and lefts! Big Foot is taking it to Rage! He whips him to the ropes…Rage ducks a clothesline…he walked right into a big boot!!!! Cover by Big Foot…1…2…kickout by Rage!

DD: No fair! Big Foot is double teaming!

VJ: What?!

DD: Come on! It's 2 on 1!!!!!

VJ: Big Foot isn't 2 people! Anarchy just tagged himself in from the outside…he's hammering away to the back of Rage! Anarchy is going for the Doomsday Drop it looks like…thumb to the eye by Rage…he just clipped the injured leg of Anarchy!

DD: He shouldn't even be wrestling tonight after what Scarlet KV did here tonight! Oh!!! Look in the aisle Vince!!!!

VJ: Oh no!!! It's the damn L.o.D.!!!! Angle, Wolverine and Reaper all look angry after that attack backstage earlier on from the Riot Makerz and the Posse! Look at that look on Rage's face!!!!

DD: I think he just pissed in his pants!!!

VJ: Rage just told Angle and the boys to bring it…OH!! Anarchy clotheslines him to the outside and look at this!!! The L.o.D. is doing a number on Rage on the outside!!! This is terrible!!!! Angle picks up Rage…Irish whip sends him into the guardrail!!! Wolverine has Rage set up for something…oh!!!! Lightning and Big Foot are attacking the L.o.D.!!!!!

DD: Get them back in the ring, ref!!!

VJ: The L.o.D. has no business being out here!!!! Ice Cube from the locker room just nailed Reaper from behind with a clothesline!! Ice Cube and Reaper are brawling away on the outside…Lightning is battling Angle, Big Foot is going at it with Wolverine!!! Anarchy is in the ring with a steel chair…Rage with a schoolboy…1…2…kickout by Anarchy and Rage accidentally knocks the Ref to the floor!!

DD: Vince, they've gone nuts again!!! Son of a bitch, it's the holiday season!!!! Why can't we all get along?! For 1 night!!!!!

VJ: Anarchy is setting Rage up for the Doomsday Drop…Rage counters with a DDT!!!!!! Rage is ready for the kill!!!! He's climbing to the top rope…there's RARE AIRE!!!!!!! Anarchy is done…oh no!!!!!Staks just came from the crowd and shattered a bottle over Rage's head!!!!!!!

DD: HAHAHA! That was great!!!!!

VJ: Anarchy rolls an arm on top of Rage…the ref is back in the ring…1…2…3!!!!!

DD: Did you see that!!!!! HAHAH!

VJ: Staks has just showed up from the crowd and screwed Rage out of the I-C or TV titles!!!!! Rage is out like a Light but Ice Cube isn't…ICE BREAKER ON STAKS!!!!!!! Ice Cube is assaulting Staks on the floor!!! This match is gotten completely out of control!!!!! Lightning is in the ring and now he tries to roll up Anarchy for the pin…where's the ref?!

DD: He's having a nice conversation with the Olympic Bad Ass on the other side of the ring!

VJ: You idiot!!!!! Lightning may have had Anarchy beaten right here…he's headed out to the floor…right hand sends Angle to the ground!!!!! Lightning climbs to the top rope now…he's measuring Anarchy…OH!!! Reaper shook the rope from the outside and Lightning falls! Damn it, get these idiots in the L.o.D. out of here!

DD: Don't let Prez Firestorm here you say that!!

VJ: Anarchy climbs up to the top rope with Lightning…superplex takes Lightning down!!!!!! This match is over…1…2…kickout by Lightning!!!!! I could've sworn that Anarchy had him!!!!

DD: I think Anarchy did have him! Look at that idiot Big Foot getting his ass whooped on the floor!!!!

VJ: The ref has really lost control of this match! He's headed to the floor to try and get these L.o.D. members out of here!!!!! Wait a minute!!!! Scarlet KV just ran down to ringside!!!!! Scarlet KV is in the ring and he's attacked Anarchy!!!!! Scarlet KV and Anarchy are battling it out in the ring!

DD: How is KV out here after what happened earlier tonight?!

VJ: KV is all taped up after that match earlier on…Anarchy nails him in the face with a right hand!!!!!! He's gonna give KV the Doomsday Drop…wait a minute! Wolverine just nailed Anarchy with a chairshot!!!!! Wolverine just nailed Anarchy with a chairshot…he hands the chair to KV and he nails him too!!!!! KV and Wolverine just shook hands!!!!! What does this mean?!

DD: I think…I think Scarlet KV is the newest member of the L.o.D.!!!!!!

VJ: I can't believe it!!!!! Is this that big plan that Firestorm was talking about earlier on?! KV and the L.o.D. are all walking away laughing!! They've practically left this match in shambles!!!!!!

DD: That was great! That idiot Anarchy didn't even see it coming!!!

VJ: Lightning mat not have even seen that! He just picked up Anarchy…there's the Lightning Bolt!!!!! The ref is back in the ring and Lightning makes the cover…1…2…3!!!!!!

VJ: Anarchy has just been robbed by the Legion of Destruction and he's pissed off!

DD: Yeah, get your ass out of here!

VJ: We're down to the final 2! It's the cousins Lightning and Big Foot! 1 of these 2 men will walk out the I-C Champion, the other will have to settle for the TV title! Here they go!!!! Lightning and Big Foot are trading blow!!!!! They're going at it tooth and nail!!!!! Lightning is getting the upper hand on Big Foot and he backs him to the buckle! Irish whip by Lightning…reversal by Big Foot sends Lightning to the buckle…damn it it's Anarchy!!!!!!

DD: What the hell is he doing?!

VJ: Anarchy has snapped!!!!! Just ran into the ring with a chair and bashed Big Foot!!!!!! Lightning tries to help out Big Foot but catches a shot to the ribs…OH!!!!!!! He just tattooed Lightning with that chairshot!!!!! Get Anarchy out of there!

DD: Yeah, you lost you big idiot! Get out of the ring!

VJ: Anarchy is headed back to the locker room and it looks like he wants a piece of the Legion of Destruction, but meanwhile we've got the 2 remaining participants in this match out cold!!!!!

DD: What happens in a draw?!

VJ: Then Lightning keeps both belts. The ref is putting the count down…1…2…3…4…5…6…Big Foot is up on 6!!!

DD: oh my gosh, Vince! I think we have a new I-C Champion!!!

VJ: Lightning is down! He's not moving! Big Foot throws an arm across the chest…1…2…OH!! Lightning got the shoulder up somehow!!!!! How did he do it?!

DD: It's steroids!!!!!!! I know it is!!!!

VJ: Big Foot looks hungry! He's hungry for gold!!!! He picks Lightning up by the hair and he has him by the throat…chokeslam!!!!!! Cover…1…2…Lightning got the shoulder up again!!!!!!

DD: I think Big Foot's getting frustrated!

VJ: he nails Lightning with a right hand! He whips Lightning hard into the buckle and ducks the head…uh oh! Lightning caught him!

DD: Big Foot…get ready to Ride the Lightning!!!!

VJ: There's the Running Powerbomb!!!!!! 1…2…Big Foot got the shoulder up!!!!! Both men back to their feet and they floor each other with a double clothesline!!!!!!! Both men are down again!!!! They want that belt bad!!!

DD: this isn't about the belt, this is about pride! My sources told me the winner of this match is out of the family!

VJ: The winner?!

DD: that's right! If you were apart of that family, you'd be fighting to get out too!

VJ: Oh will you stop?! The ref is counting down again…he's up to 6…Big Foot is moving again…he's getting back to his feet and he picks up Lightning…there's the Natural Disaster!!!!!!!! We have a new champion…1…2…3!!!!!!!

DD: NO NO NO!!!!!! Foot on the rope!!!!!!

VJ: Huh?! Oh my God that was close!!!!! Big Foot can't believe it! He hooks the far leg of Lightning…1…2…kickout by Lightning again!!!!! Big Foot is getting pissed off! He pulls Lightning out to the center of the ring…he's climbing to the 2^nd rope!!!!

DD: This could be it…wait a minute!!!!

VJ: Lightning is back to his feet! He nails Big Foot in the midsection with a right hand! Lightning lifts Big Foot up on the top rope now…Lightning is climbing up with Big Foot…there's the Lightning Rod!!!!!! Lightning makes the cover…1…2…3!!!!!

VJ: Despite the outside interference earlier in the match, what a match that was! Lightning is still the I-C Champion and Big Foot will walk away with the TV title!

DD: Wait a minute!!! Big Foot is back up and he doesn't look too happy with Lightning!

VJ: Lightning has both belts…he's about to hand the TV Title to Big Foot and Big Foot is staring a hole through his cousin!!!!

DD: Uh oh!!!! We're about to have a good old fashioned family whooping!!!! Beat his ass Big Foot!!!!!

VJ: Lightning is offering the belt and he's offering friendship too…Big Foot is gonna hit Lightning!

DD: Get him! Get him…AWWWWWWW!!! They shook hands!!!!!! You faggots suck!!!!!

VJ: Lightning and Big Foot both walk out as Champions and FINALLY someone has some sportsmanship…OH MY GOD!!!!!! Big Foot just attacked Lightning from behind!!!!! What the hell???! Big Foot is attacking his cousin!!!!! Damn it!!!!!! I can't believe what we've just seen!!!! Big Foot has turned his back on…

DD: What are you talking about?! They're hugging?!

VJ: (Silence) Oh sorry! Glasses again! Congrats to Lightning but up next, it's the Kamikaze match!!!!!

Kurt: Yeah?

Prez: How did everything go? Is KV in?

Kurt: Yeah, it all went according to plan! We didn't find Trish though.

Prez: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T FIND TRISH?????!!!!!!

Kurt: We heard that Tina put her in the trunk of some car…we'll try to find her! Oh…and Sniper said to give you a message.

Prez: A message? What's tha--

VJ: OH!!! Sniper just attacked Firestorm from behind with a 2X4!!!!!

VJ: The battle for control is underway! The loser of this match must get thrown off of the roof of this building onto land mines below!!!

DD: Who booked this sh*t?!

VJ: Your Prez!

DD: And what a fine match it is!!!! You go Prez! You go Prez!!!!!

VJ: Shut up!!!! Sniper is doing a number on the much larger Firestorm…OH MY!!! Firestorm caught the Commish by the throat and lifts him up over his head with 1 hand!!!!!

DD: HAHAAH!!! Look out Sniper!!!!!

VJ: OH MY!!!!!!! Firestorm just tossed Sniper onto a C4 explosives!!!!!! Sniper has just been blown up!!!!!

DD: Tha Block is Hot, but I don't think Sniper wanted it to be that hot!

VJ: Firestorm is pissed off! He just ripped that drainage pipe off of the side of the building…look out Sniper…OH! Firestorm tried to take his head off with that pipe!! Once again he tried to hit Sniper with the pipe!!!Firestorm is stalking the Commish…what on Earth?!

DD: The roof is collapsing!!!!!

VJ: Prez Firestorm just stepped on a weak spot in the roof and his foot fell through!!! Firestorm is stuck and Sniper has that 2x4 again!!!

DD: Look out Prez!!!!!! OH!!!!!!!!

VJ: OH MY GOODNESS!! Sniper with a home run shot right to the head of Commish Firestorm!!!!! Firestorm has been busted wide open after that shot!!!! And look at Sniper!!! Sniper has lost it…OH!!! Once again, Sniper with a big 2x4 shot to the head of Firestorm!!! That roof is getting weaker it looks like!!!

DD: Be careful guys!!! That place could collapse at any moment!

VJ: Firestorm pulls himself out of that hole and he's trying to escape the Commish and leader of the 9^th St. Posse!!! Sniper is measuring Firestorm…he's back to his feet and he catches a Superkick…OH!! Firestorm just rolled over the edge of the roof and he's hanging on!!!!!!

DD: NOOO!! Sniper! Don't do it!!!! Don't do it!!!!!

VJ: Sniper is standing tall above the Prez of this company!!! If Firestorm falls he will be blown to Kingdom Come!! Sniper has that 2x4 once again…he nails Firestorm in the head…oh no!!!!! Firestorm fell!!!!! Firestorm just fell off the roof!!!!!

DD: I can't believe it!! Sniper just killed Firestorm!!!!!!

VJ: Sniper is standing supreme!! The Prez has been knocked off the roof…why didn't I hear an explosion?!

DD: Cuz you're a deaf bastard! Oh look!!!!!! The Prez is back!!!

VJ: What?! Firestorm didn't fall! Firestorm is standing up on the roof and Sniper doesn't see him…OH GOD!!!!!!! He caught Sniper with a spear and almost drilled a hole through him!!!!!!! Firestorm picks Sniper up like a rag doll across the roof!!!!!

DD: Look out Snip! You made him mad! He'll eat you!!!!!

VJ: Stop it!!! Sniper is slow to get back up…Prez Firestorm mows him down with a huge forearm!!!!!! Firestorm is putting the boots to the Sniper up on the roof! He's got Sniper by the head now…

Prez: You hear me, bitch!! This is my fed!!! It always will be and there ain't nothing you can do about it!!!!!

DD: Did you hear that?! Look out Sniper!!!!!!

VJ: OH!!!! Prez Firestorm just drove him into the ground with that powerbomb!!! Firestorm just said he was gonna throw Sniper off the roof now!!! This match is sadistic…no he has Sniper up!!!!!

DD: Oh God!!!!!! Look out Snip!!!!

VJ: Prez Firestorm is gonna Press Slam him off the roof…don't do it!!! Don't do it!!!!!! Sniper with a rake to the face of Firestorm and he manages to escape!!!

DD: Thank God!! I don't know who to root for in this one, Vince!

VJ: Sniper pulls Firestorm over to a c4 explosive…he's gonna try and blow Firestorm up…OH!! Firestorm counters with a right hand to the jaw of the Commish!! Oh no!!

DD: Oh! Tell me he's not gonna do that!!!!!

VJ: Firestorm is gonna powerbomb Sniper on that explosive!!!!! Don't do it Firestorm!! Don't do it…Powerbomb…Sniper counters into a swinging DDT--OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! THE ROOF BROKE!!!!!!!! THE ROOF BROKE!!!!!!!! SNIPER JUST DDT'D FIRESTORM THROUGH THE ROOF OF THAT ABONDONED BUILDING!!!!!!!

DD: Oh my God, they're dead!!!!!!!

VJ: Firestorm and Sniper both have to be injured after that one! No doubt about it!!! Is this match still on?! Where’s the ref?!

DD: Stop asking so many questions, skankhole!!!!!

VJ: I would suggest that this…oh no!!! look at the door!!! Sniper is dragging Firestorm up the stairwell! Both men are busted open and hurting after going through the roof, but they both want the ownership of the company that badly!

DD: How are they walking?!

VJ: Sniper is trying to pick up Firestorm…SNIPER DRIVER on the roof!!!

DD: Be careful! You might break it again!!!

VJ: Sniper is in control but he barely knows where he is! He's picking up Firestorm…he hooks him for the Sniper Bomb…Firestorm with a low blow!!!!! OH!! He has Sniper by the throat!!!!!

DD: It could be it for Sniper!!!!

VJ: Firestorm has Sniper by the throat…there's the Big Time!!!!!!! Both men are down though!!!!!! My God what a fight!!!!! These 2 men aren't active wrestlers on the roster but they're giving it their all!

DD: This one is over, Vince! It has to be!!

VJ: Firestorm is getting back to his feet and he's picking up Sniper! Blood is dripping from the head of both men and Firestorm is gonna try and toss Sniper off the roof!!!

DD: I always liked Sniper! Give Mad Dog a Christmas Card for me, Snip!!!!!

VJ: He's gonna toss Sniper off…NO!! Sniper with the low blow this time…Sniper hooks Firestorm back up…OH NO!!!!!!! Sniper Bomb on the explosive!!!!!!!! Sniper Bomb on the bomb!!!!!! Sniper may have just destroyed Firestorm!!!!!!

DD: But I think Sniper hurt himself on that move too! He's down again!!!

VJ: What an incredible battle!! Sniper has taken it to Firestorm and vice versa…they're both getting back up!!! How are they doing this after the punishment they've inflicted on each other!

DD: Well you know the Posse like to dabble in the art of the Delaware (lights a blunts and smokes it) and as for Firestorm…definitely crack!

VJ: Sniper and Firestorm have pulled themselves back to their feet…Sniper nails Firestorm…Firestorm nails Sniper…they're slugging it out…

DD: Huh?!

VJ: What the hell is that?!

Voice: Yo!!!!! Sniper, Firestorm!!!!! Why don't you 2 bitches calm down for a second and listen up!!!!!!

VJ: Wait a minute…that sounds like…it couldn't be…

VJ: Oh my God!!!! It's Panther!!!!!!

DD: Panther?! What’s he doing out there???!

Panther: Now I know you're both a little busy…after all you're fighting for control of the NFWA, right? Well Snip, Firestorm, let me tell you bitches 1 thing: I don't give a damn what matches you have, I don't give a damn how bloody you get, I couldn't give a rats furry, flea-infested ass how many times you blow each other up, the NFWA is, was, and will forever be the Panther's show!!!!! Now Firestorm, Sniper…you pay close attention, because right now you're about to find out exactly why there's no right way…there's no wrong way…there's only the Panther's way…

Panther: (Laughs)…AND THERE CAN'T BE ANY OTHER WAY!!!!!!!!!!!

VJ AND DD: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DD: Panther just blew up the building with Sniper and the Prez on top!!!!!! He can't do that!!!!!!!!

VJ: Oh my God!!!!! I can't believe he just did that!!!!!!! Panther has just demolished the building…and apparently Sniper and Firestorm as well!!!!!

DD: (Crying) Panther!!!! How could you!!!!!!!

VJ: I can't believe Panther just did that! And he's smiling!!!! I can't believe this!!! Prez Firestorm and Sniper may be dead!!!!!!!!!!!

VJ: Ladies and gentlemen, the World Title match is up next…Killa Vs Lightning…

DD: What was Panther thinking?!

VJ: I don't know! Panther has definitely gone over the edge tonight, and whether you like the L.o.D. or the Posse you can't agree with what Panther just did!!!!

Shyanne: Hey Pro! You got some mail here!

Pro: Let me see that!

DD: Now what?!

VJ: Does the Professional know who the attempted killer is?! He's headed out to the parking lot it looks like! The Professional is out in the parking lot!

Pro: Come on! Bring you ass out here and face me like a man!!!!!!!

DD: He must have found him!!!

VJ: Who sent Pro that letter!

DD: What the hell?!

VJ: There's a black van…wait a minute!!!!! That van just tried to run down the Pro!!!!!! What in the hell was that?! Somebody just tried to run the Professional over…damn it!!! OH!! Some masked man just nailed the Pro in the back of the head with a sledgehammer!!!!! Who is that man?! He's beating the hell out of the Professional with that hammer! Get some help back there!!!

DD: Well what do you know! Somebody really was trying to kill him!!

VJ: OH NO!! He just jammed that sledgehammer right into the face of the Pro!!! He just bent down…he's wiping the blood off of Pro's face…who is that Dave?!

DD: I don't know!

DD: Oh joy! It's a abomi…abom…look Vince, here comes your momma!

VJ: Idiot!

Big Foot: Now…I know that this is a big match so please listen to what I have to say! All night long we've been seeing chaos, we've been seeing interferences! It seems like people in the NFWA don't know how to mind their own business anymore, but that's OK, cuz I've come up with a solution! Just to make sure that there's no interference, I'm gonna be the special guest enforcer! Oh yeah, and I brought some backup!!!!

DD: Backup?!

VJ: Holy Moley…it's Foley!!!!!!

DD: Shut up!!!!! What is that idiot Cactus Jack doing here???! He's not with the NFWA!!!

VJ: Cactus Jack is gonna make sure that this match has a fair ending!! Lightning is smiling…OH!! Killa caught him from behind with a clothesline!!!!! Killa is doing a number on the I-C Champ! Irish whip sends Lightning to the ropes…Killa buries the knee into the stomach! Elbow drop by Killa! Once again!!! Killa is going to work on Lightning with big elbows and now stomps right to the head!!!!

DD: Killa is on fire, Vince!

VJ: Killa is waiting on Lightning to get up…clothesline!!!!!! Lightning over the top and bashes his head on the arena floor!!!!!! Things aren't starting out the way that Lightning wanted them to!

DD: Yeah, he got lucky in the I-C Match, but his luck has just gone bad!!!

VJ: Lightning walks over to his cousin Big Foot…Killa is on the ring apron…OH!! Flying clothesline by Killa just drilled Lightning!!!!! Killa is putting the boots to the ribs of Lightning…Big Foot is trying to get Killa back in the ring…Killa just shoved Big Foot!

DD: uh oh!! This is getting ugly!!!!!

VJ: We've got a confrontation between the World Champ and Big Foot…here comes Cactus Jack to try and break those 2 up…OH!!! Killa just shoved Jack down…Lightning speared Killa!!! Lightning is hammering away on the World Champ!!!

DD: Can you hear this crowd, Vince?!

VJ: This crowd is incredible tonight! Lightning picks up Killa…Irish whip sends Killa crashing into the stairs…Lightning with a bulldog on the floor!!!!

DD: I don't know! Didn't that look a little convenient that Jack and Big Foot…

VJ: Don't even start! We've had enough controversy tonight! Lightning throws Killa back into the ring…he hits off the ropes and floors Killa with a clothesline!!!!!!! Lightning hits off the other side…there's another clothesline that takes Killa off of his feet!!! Lightning is on a roll! He backs Killa into the buckle and he mounts him for the 10 count punch…1…2…3…OH!!!!!!! Killa just drove Lightning down with a sit down powerbomb!!! This match is all over…1…2…kickout by Lightning!!!

DD: Wow!! Did you see Lightning's head bounce off the canvas?

VJ: Lightning is hurt after that tremendous powerbomb!!! Killa picks Lightning up…backbreaker on the I-C Champ and look at Killa holding him on his knee!!! This is a submission hold!!! Will Lightning quit!

DD: Of course!!!!! He's got no guts whatsoever!!!

VJ: It's been a long, long night here in Orlando! Killa is trying to break Lightning in half…the ref is checking to see if Lightning gives…Lightning is holding on!!!

DD: Give up Lightning!! Give up!!!

VJ: Lightning won't quit!! He's fighting this hold…Killa picks Lightning back up…what strength!!! Fallaway Slam by Killa! He makes the cover…1…2…kickout by Lightning!!! Killa locks on a reverse chinlock now!!! This crowd is split yet again here tonight! They like both Killa and Lightning!

DD: So what?! They would like Lightning and Killa! This entire state has a combined IQ of -2, which shows how bad they suck!

VJ: Can you be nice for once?! I'm begging you? Lightning is trying to break this hold again…he's fighting back to his feet…elbow to the stomach of Killa…there's another…the hold is broken!! Lightning hits off the ropes and hits the sunset flip on Killa…1…2…kickout by the Champ!!! Lightning charges in but Killa nails him with a spinebuster!!!!!

DD: look in the aisle!! The L.o.D. is back!!!

VJ: Oh no!!! The L.o.D. is headed back to the ring!!! They've even got Scarlet KV with them!

DD: You know they're mad after what happened to our poor Prez and our poor, poor Commish!!!!

VJ: You suck ass! Killa sees them coming down the aisle and he's got a problem with that…Big Foot is trying to get the L.o.D. to leave…OH!! Reaper nails Big Foot! They're attacking Big Foot again!!!! Angle, Reaper, KV and Wolverine are doing a number on the enforcer…here comes Cactus jack…he just pulled out a barbwire bat!!!!!

DD: look out gang!!!

VJ: OHH!!! Angle has just been nailed with that bat! Reaper catches a shot too!! Down goes KV!!! Down goes Wolverine!!!!!!!

DD: Run gang!!!!!

VJ: Cactus Jack is chasing the L.o.D. away from ringside! We will have a fair winner…OH!!! Lightning with a powerbomb on Killa…1…2…kickout by Killa! Lightning picks him back up…Irish whip…Killa reverses and sends him into the buckle!! He charges but Lightning got the boot up!!!

DD: Oh no!! Look out Killa!

VJ: BOOM!! Lightning with a tornado DDT!!! Cover…1…2…kickout!!!!!!

DD: HAHA! Look in the aisle!

VJ: Oh no!!!! Not again!!! The L.o.D. is headed back out here and they've got weapons!!

DD: Paybacks are Hell Foley!!

VJ: They're surrounding Cactus Jack an Big Foot!!! This isn't good at all…

VJ: We've got a car driving out here…

DD: Oh no!!!!! That's Downcast and Total Devastation!!!

VJ: Downcast and Total Devastation have returned and they're driving that car to ringside!!! Downcast just climbed through the sunroof…OH!!! Flying spear by Downcast just caught Angle!!! Downcast is tearing into Kurt Angle on the floor…Shark and the Gang are helping out too!!! Cactus Jack just nailed Wolverine with a Double Armed DDT!

DD: This was a setup!!!!!

VJ: Angle just rolled to the roof of that car and Downcast follows him up there too…boot to the stomach of Angle…TOTAL DISPEAR ON THE ROOF OF THAT CAR!!!!!!!

DD: OH NO!!! Kurt!!!!!

VJ: The L.o.D. is being beaten to death by this mob out here and now they're reatreating!!!!! The L.o.D. is retreating!!! Back in the ring…Lightning is setting up for something…he charges at Killa but gets caught in a powerslam!!!!!!! Killa with the cover…1…2…kickout!!!!!!!

DD: I thought he had him!!!

VJ: Killa looks to be preparing for the end! He's setting up for the Takeover…OH!! Lightning counters with an inverted Atomic Drop…clothesline takes Killa down!!! Lightning won't take the loss the easily!! He picks Killa back up…here comes the Lightning Bolt…NO!! Killa counters and whips Lightning to the ropes…he misses with the clothesline…Lightning with a German Suplex…1…2…3!!!!!!!! We've got a new Champion!!!!!!!!!

DD: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!

VJ: Lightning has done it!!!!! Lightning is the brand new NFWA Champion!!!!!!!!

DD: I can't believe this!!!!!! I don't know who was worse, Lightning or that idiot Killa!!!!!

VJ: What a match that was…what a night this was! Ladies and gents, thank you for joining us tonight here at Apocalypse Now…hopefully by FNS we'll have info on Prez Firestorm, Commish Sniper and the Professional!

DD: And where's Trish?!

VJ: We still have no word on the location of Trish Stratus! Well ladies and gents, thanks for…OH NO!!! It's Krazed!!!!!! Krazed is back!!!!!

DD: What in the World?!

VJ: Krazed just came from the crowd with a chair and he's bashing the new World Champion!!!!! We haven't seen him since that incident between Panther and Tina last week on FNS, and he's back!!! He's trying to destroy Lightning!!! Krazed picks Lightning back up…SUPERNOVA!!!!!!!

DD: HAHAAH! I'm loving it! Go Krazed!

VJ: Krazed has the World Title belt in his hand…here comes Downcast and Big Foot!!! Krazed drops the belt and scatters!!!!!! My goodness, it's crazy here tonight! For Delaware Dave, this is Vince Johnson saying Happy Holidays and we'll see you next week on the Slam!!!!!!!