ETW's only true Mexican superstar, El Gringo Roso is a man of many words - both English and Spanish. Donning a pink Lucha Libre mask in the ring, Gringo is one of the most recognizable wrestlers in the ETW - not only by the mask but also by the odd skin disorder he has that makes him the only white Mexican in wrestling today. He was crowned the first ever ETW North American champion and he also holds the distinction of being half of the first major feud to occur in ETW: Gomez vs. Gringo. That feud was put to an end (for now) when El Gringo defeated Gomez in a retirement match, and it was then that Gringo moved on to the main event star that he currently is today. With his vast array of original and entertaining moves (such as the Gringo Driver, Robot Punch, and "suplex macheen" suplexes), in-ring smack talk, and trademark dancing to his music, El Gringo Roso is one of ETW's finest - that is unless you call him a "beaner"; then things REALLY go wrong!
The man who calls himself Jesus.....he has indeed risen in ETW. Jesse Barton has a background of ameteur wrestling and street fighting; both of which are very evident when you watch him in the ring. He also is an athiest in the most extreme sense - he does not believe in the Christian tradition whatsoever. In fact, he believes in only himself - and since he believes in himself and not God or Jesus, and unlike them he is a living creature....LIVING JESUS is born. Living Jesus also just happens to be the first ever ETW World Heavyweight Champion, and his complete fighting package is rounded out by his own invented version of the powerbomb called the Barton Bomb and a modified crossface hold called the Crossface Crunch. Sporting tattoos on each shoulder, a look of determination and intimidation, and the title of "Jesus", it is obvious that one does not screw with Living Jesus Jesse Barton. WWJD - What Would Jesse Do? He'd probably beat your ass.....
"THE PEOPLE'S CHAMP" JOHN MILLER
Looks. Charisma. Style. John Miller is all of the above and then some. Truly deserving of his title of "the people's champ", John is the same to ETW as The Rock is to the WWF. Brought up from a very athletic background, John was always the type to try and be the best at everything he did. Upon entering the ETW, he did just that - amazing the other wrestlers and the fans with his business-like approach to the sport and methodical destruction of his opponents reminiscent of the great Bret Hart. He is indeed a man of few words; the majority of his talking is done in the ring. Whether he's nailing his opponent with a knife-like Spear or lightning-fast Russian Legsweep, or watching some poor soul scream for his life when he slaps on the Miller Lock, it's no wonder why John was dubbed "the people's champion" - how could you not like this guy? He's got it all - and it's Miller time all the time here in ETW.
Well, where do we begin here....let's start with the obvious. He is, to put it simply, one crazy bastard. Leading a very tormented youth turned your average joe into exactly what his name suggests: an outcast of society left with nowhere to go and no one to go to. Enter the ETW - the perfect place to let the pure psychotic nature of The Outcast run wild. In the entire world of wrestling, there has never been a character like this; where else but ETW will you see someone that impersonates professional wrestlers, uses every form of DDT ever invented, dresses in goth, talks to a skull, calls himself the "Sultan of Hardcore", nails opponents with superkicks from nowhere, and uses a move called the "Suck-My-Nuts" Powebomb. NOWHERE. Perhaps the most feared aspect of the Outcast is in fact his finishing hold - the Sanatarium. This leg-lock scissor hold has broken many a neck and is the nail in the complete coffin of this dark creature known as Outcast....free at last......
Much like Mr. Gates, System Crash could be the man to one day monopolize ETW. But unlike Microsoft, this computer dude won't be split into two seperate units....or will he? Beginning as your average joe computer programmer that could appeal to any standard wrestling fan (complete with a keyboard as a weapon), System Crash recently turned over a new leaf and did the unthinkable: he found God. This occured one day when he was injured and discovered that ETW was way too violent for him - so it is now his mission (or is it His mission) to purify the wrestlers and the ETW itself. Now instead of being all about the Pentiums, System Crash is all about the 3 C's: Christ, Censorship, and Championship. And with moves like the Download, the vicious Re-Boot, and the newly discovered Twist of Faith he has a definite shot at the third C. But how long can a phase like this last? Only one man knows for sure - and only time will tell the rest.
ETW's man with the plan - his name is Cam. Built like a brick shit-house, Cam Summers came to ETW like many other wrestlers did - he was following his goal of becoming a professional wrestler. However, there is something on Cam's agenda that seems to be missing from many others: PAIN. Summertime will not only beat you, he will make sure that you never forget that he beat you. He's a pain machine with a mean streak and hold the same warning as most machinery does: Use Exteme Caution. Cause when Cam is "running", he's dishing out vicious spinebusters left and right and tossing lesser men around like they were Cabbage Patch Kids. And just when you thought that it couldn't get any worse, "Summertime" comes and the unlucky opponent finds himself dropped square on their skull as the result of a Tombstone piledriver like only Cam could dish out. In ETW, Summertime lasts more than 3 months - cause Cam is bringing the pain all year round.
There once was a man named Ryfle - he was your typical Shawn Michaels
wannabe who took opponents out with a superkick. This man, however, was
no HBK - he was a complete crowd-killing loser that would never amount
to anything in the ETW. So one day, after being embarassed for the last
time, something snapped. Ryfle proceeded to beat his opponent to the point
of bleeding - and he LOVED it. From that day forward, the Ryfle was dead
- enter Hardkore Hollingsworth; the metalhead scrub with a black headband
who takes crap from no one and pain from whoever is lucky enough to get
a chance to cause it. His specialty is the hardkore match - it is here
that the essence of "The Hard One" is discovered; cookie sheets, road signs,
oil pans, garbage cans...whatever it takes to soften his opponent up for
the infamous Spike. Hardkore is indeed exactly that - he'll dish it, he'll
take it, but above all - he'll be right at home in all of it. BESTRAFE
MICH!
He's your favorite, he's my favorite, he's everyone's favorite hardcore wrestler - he is the Karate Man. Decked from head to toe in sparring gear and highly trained in many different martial arts, his name fits him better than you might think. Karate Man can beat you in a number of ways, but perhaps one of his strongest forms of intimidation is not actually a move at all, but rather the vast array of Japanese ninja weapons he possesses and occasionally brings to the ring with him. He's been seen wielding nunchuks, karate sticks, a pair of sais, and even a triple staff! But make no mistake about it, Karate Man does not need these fighting weapons to take out his opposition. Armed with many karate moves, hardcore wrestling skills, and a diving headbutt for a finisher that could kill a man (if he weren't wearing a padded helmet), Karate Man is a force to be reckoned with in the ETW - a force so powerful it needs to be pads for his opponents protection!
With a name influenced by All Hallow's Eve, Spook is by far the most bizzare wrestler in the ETW. No one is quite sure where he came from or what his purpose is - all that is known is that he claims to be from "the halls of illusions" and sports a scary looking mask similar to the one found in the Scream movies. All the scary, spooky, Halloween stuff is great, but can he wrestle? You bet. Already having an advantage over most of his opponents due to his bizzare persona creating a distraction, the spooky Spook will either beat you with his deadly sitdown powerbomb (named the Necromancer) or he'll make your face look like Halloween came early with his skull-crushing version of the Pedigree aptly named Halloween-X. And if that isn't enough, Spook can and will summon his many spooky masked minions to even the stakes - making a "walk down the hallway" one that few ETW wrestlers are willing to take. Spooooooooooky.........
A member of the Carnival of Carnage, which is actually just a gathering of Spook's minions, Dirty Spook stands out from the others for many reasons. First of all, he's just plain dirty. No doubt about it. He's not the type of wrestler that you'd feel comfortable facing in the ring. I guess one could call them "mind games", but most people just call it dirty - hence the name Dirty Spook. Even though he came from a similar background as his friend Spook, Dirty Spook is much more bizzare and strange with his in-ring tactics and appearance. Bringing to the ring anything he can think of and using any move he decides to use on the fly, Dirty Spook is very unpredictable and that is by far his most prized asset. In fact, he is so off-the-wall and strange that he may one day surpass his less-freaky Spook friends and his "dirtiness" will lead him to the top.
Keepin' it real 'till the casket drops - that's what the first tag team in ETW history is doing, and in the case of Dead Homie even AFTER the casket drops! O.G. Gusto was a true thug from the streets of Long Beach, Cali who needed to step out of the ghetto to make a real living, and the Dead Homie was a chronic-toking, liquor-drinking gangsta from Compton before shot in cold blood. He was ressurrected from the dead in ETW around the same time Gusto arrived from Cali and the rest is history. They formed from a bond they shared as thugs on the streets, and continue to represent and hold that tie with the streets each time they step into the ring. Using baseball bats, street tactics, and in one case actually busting caps into a team that defeated them, it is evident that you don't cross these two thugged-out O.G.s. They just might nail you with the 187, beat you down like a snitch, or simply pull out a gat and rob your ass ghetto-style.
ETW never needed any authority until things started to get unfair and shaky - enter "The Boss" Greg Nowell. Before the arrival of "The Boss", ETW was a chaotic one-horse town with no justice and no rules. Now there's a new sherriff in town, and he's fixing to meet somewhere between ruling with an iron fist and allowing the cracking of a skull with an iron pipe. All about fairness, Greg's position as the ETW Commissioner (and part time announcer) means only one thing: he's the boss and what he says goes. When a screwjob win requires some sort of retribution from the screwed party, Greg is the man who will make it happen. If there's a certain wrestler who starts to become more of a distraction than an attraction for the ETW fans, Greg's there to whip him into shape. But, if you do something that rubs Mr. Nowell the wrong way, you'll find out why the phrase most associated with our commissioner is in fact "Don't cross the boss". You'll be sorry if you do.
Even though Chris A is one of the newest additions to the ETW roster, you'd never guess by his performance and prowess in the ring. Growing up with and being exposed to professional wrestling his entire life, Chris decided long ago that he wanted to one day step into the ring and become the man he idolized: The Rock. However, once he wrestled one match as the Rock wannabe "The Jabroni", Chris realized that he never would and never could be The Rock - he could be more than just a ripoff. Since that decision, Chris has fine-tuned his wrestling skills to fit his OWN needs and is quickly becoming his own wrestler with a very bright future in the ETW. Much quicker than Rocky, Chris's number one strength lies in his ability to stick-and-move; he'll annoy the crap out of his opponent before going for the kill out of complete nowhere and before you know it it's 1 - 2 - 3. Don't call this young star a jabroni - it may be the last mistake you'll make.
What can be said about the Bone Daddy? We can start with the basis: the BONE. This well-endowed ETW star one of the fan favorites due to the rather large bone he carries with him at all times. Sometimes he gets a little funky with the bone and starts dancing with it, sometimes he gets a little kinky with the bone and starts playing with it, and sometimes he gets a little violent with the bone and starts smacking people with it. But no matter what the big, bad Bone Daddy does with his big bone, let's talk about what he does with his opponents in the ring. Weaving in and out between hardcore and standard wrestling, Bone Daddy is a very versatle, quick, and skilled wrestler with a knack for getting the crowd on his side and his opponents on the mat. Whether he bones you with that big bone of his, or bones you with the pumphandle slam he calls the "Boner", Bone Daddy will leave you limp in the ring as you realize how "hard" it can be to beat him.
Much like a real freight train, this more recent ETW addition is going to be tough to stop. Built small and destructive, the man known as A-Train makes a name for himself in the ETW the only way he knows how: putting on a good match. In a wrestling world based on glamour, glitz, and "entertainment", A-Train takes every element of professional wrestling back to its fundamental roots; as an athlete who's been a fan and backyard wrestler since the day he was old enough to understand, he knows exactly how to go about doing just that. He lives, eats, and breathes wrestling. He studies other wrestlers, picks up on their strengths and implements them into his own offense. He studies his opponents and learns to attack their weaknesses. And once he senses the end coming, he finishes his fundamental destruction to nails his opponent with the Freighttrainer - end of story. Look out, ETW - you just may be tied to the tracks of the A-TRAIN.
As one of ETW's few seasoned veterans and a man who lives by the code of the "old school", Gomez's career came to an unfortunate end (for now) at the hands of El Gringo Roso. But, when he was an active wrestler, he liked nothing more than to do what everyone didn't want him to. Claiming to be the "Real Mexican", he spurred the first true feud in ETW with El Gringo Roso. "El Gomez's" presence as the foil to El Gringo as well as always being the man no one could trust are sorely missed in ETW - he was the textbook heel. He defeated opponents with any dirty tricks or cheap shots he could sneak by: eye pokes, choke holds, and low blows left and right; again, he was the classic heel. These days, Gomez is enjoying his retirement as a part-time ETW announcer; that is, until he comes up with some sort of evil scheme to get himself back in action and torment every ETW superstar yet again - especially El Gringo Roso.
THE C-SQUAD: PHILLIP AND BOBBY
Beginning as the preppy, goody-two-shoed studs from the upper class part of town, Phillip and Bobby were the team that everyone loved to hate and loved even more to get a shot at beating up. However, there was more to the C-Squad than met the eye; they had potential - that is, until the day that they spoke with a man named System Crash who introduced them to someone a bit bigger: the Lord. Recruited as "brothers" in System Crash's Christian Crusade to censor the ETW, Phillp and Bobby went from preppies to pawns, giving the ETW fans even MORE reason to hate the C-Squad (the C now standing for "Censorship"). Since they will never be fan favorites, Phillip and Bobby have to make their own names for themselves - their wrestling ability may do just that. Both men are trained athletes and perhaps with the right leader and mindset, the C-Squad will get someday get somewhere - either as bible-toting good sons or letterman's jacket-wearing rich boys.
His name is Kid - but don't let that fool you; he wrestles like he's been doing it for years. As a natural athlete and the younger brother of "The People's Champion" John Miller, it made perfect sense that the Kid become a professional wrestler - it's in his blood; he should take to it like a duck to water. And he did just that. One of ETW's true diamonds in the rough, the Kid has the potential to be among the elite. He's got strength and speed that rival his older brother's, a vast array of moves at his disposal, and above all an on-the-spot creativity that allows him to hit big moves out of complete nowhere. These strengths are supplemented by the fact that the Kid has no true obvious weakness, making him nearly impossible to beat without putting up the fight of your life. All this Kid needs is one lucky break, and he'll show the rest of ETW what his name is and why it should be followed by the word "champion".
The name says it all.....PUNISHMENT. This former Corporal was dishonorably discharged from the U.S. Army for severly injuring a smart-mouthed private who would not respect his authority. That event is what earned him the nickname of "punishment" and that act in itself should be enough to strike fear in any that oppose him. Specializing in, well, punishing his opponents however possible, the Corporal prefers the hardkore match to the standard match for the simple reason that he can inflict much more damage on his unsuspecting opponents. Being a former military man makes his toughness rival any of the wrestlers in all of ETW; soldiers are guys that are trained to kill and Punishment is no different. Being a newcomer to the league is the only thing holding him back from taking the entire hardkore division by storm - look out everyone, because the Corporal will indeed punish you.
The Imp is short for the "Imposter"...and being an imposter is what Imp does best...next to lose matches, of course. Imp is all about attempting to piss off his opponents with mind games - what better way to do that than to attempt and dress, wrestle, and act JUST like them? No one is safe from being impersonated, and similarly Imp is never safe from the damage that those whom he impersonates cause upon his person. But Imp doesn't limit himself to just ETW wrestlers...or even wrestlers in general. Imp-Tallica is one of his favorites; impersonating Lars Ulrich and his money-grubbing Anti-Napster corporate rock star ways. Again, NO ONE is safe from the Imp and his reign of terror...or maybe it's not terror, but it sure is annoying to be impersonated, and consequently more annoying for the Imp to just keep on getting beat down for his actions. But he must really love to be an "imposter"...because he's still here and still being "Imp-y" as ever.
Known only by one letter, the mysterious man called "X" entered into ETW at its biggest event of the year - but not as a wrestler. First emerging as a crazed fan with a deep hatred for El Gringo Roso, X actually became physically involved in the match and attacked the then-North American champion during his big title defense against the Outcast. Since that day he has vowed to make El Gringo's life a living hell, as well as emerge into ETW as one of its more surprising stars. Very, very little is known about X and his wrestling background; all that has been confirmed is that he has serious balls - you HAVE to have balls to verbally and physically attack one of ETW's finest in the fashion that this man did. Only time will tell if X is more than just a nusiance to El Gringo - we'll just see if one day the man with the one letter name becomes "X-Cellent" or simply "X-Stinct".
With a name like "the Ref", one would think that this man is simply your average referee who is rendered completely unconsious by any slight touch from a wrestler. However, THIS ref is quite the opposite. He was born during a Hardcore title match at Memorial Day Massacre 2000 between System Crash, Hardkore Hollingsworth, and Karate Man. The match was pure chaos, and for some reason Karate Man decided to attack the referee. Hardkore later followed; each man was SO into the match that they didn't care WHO they beat up. This turned out to be a mistake, because later in the match the ref finally had taken his last blow and became involved in the match himself! Since that day, this ref has retired from being a ref and become one of ETW's newest hardcore wrestlers - he can beat you in a number of ways, with a number of weapons, then make the 1 - 2 - 3 count himself.
"BITCHES!!" That is the sound you hear when ETW's "Little Bitch" heads to the ring. A question may come to mind here: why in the HELL would anyone go by the ring name of "Little Bitch"? The answer is....we really don't know. The only thing we know for sure is that the Little Bitch is part of our ETW roster and judging by his wrestling abilities we've seen thus far, he can stay. Where he came from and why he goes by such a self-insulting nickname are things that only Little Bitch himself knows, but it is obvious that Little Bitch knows where he wants to be - holding some form of ETW gold. With his signature move called, appropriately, the "Bitch Slap" and a fairly high tolerance for pain, the Little Bitch may be able to take some of the focus off of his name and put it where it should be - on his talent. He's good at more than just being a bitch....
"A construction worker gone wrong..." as The Outcast was quoted as saying during his debut match in ETW, and that is a statement fairly close to the truth. A good natured hard-working model American average joe, Con-CHUCK-tion Chuck is the poster boy for everything that is American. Which makes it just that much more unfortunate that he had to be the first victim to be crushed by BMF....so needless to say we may not see much more of good ol' Chuck in the future of ETW. But even though he may not wrestle much more these days, Chuck is worth putting on this roster list because his locker room attitude and image he portrays to the fans are assets to this company that has an athiest, a goth, a metalhead, a racist, a murderer, and a "bitch" among its roster rankings. So even though he may be useless for wrestling, Chuck is very useful in combating the bad image that ETW may portray - like we give a shit what image we portray, but still.....
MVP stands for "Most Valuable Player", and these two brothers are definitely just that in ETW's tag team division. Brought up exposed to many different team sports at a young age, the two MVPs chose tag team wrestling as the sport of choice and have not done a bad job thus far. The "Most Valuable Playaz" use a variety of in-ring tactics and rely on the art of tag team wrestling itself as their guide to success. Perhaps their biggest asset is their attitude; they enter every match with the idea that no one is going to walk all over them and no one is going to stop them from reaching the top to the ETW's tag team division no matter WHAT. It's that kind of no-quit mentality that gets those extra yards in a football game, that extra "OHMMPH" behind a baseball swing, and most importantly a pin in a wrestling match. Just like the distiction of "MVP" is an honor to an athlete, the presence of the MVPs in ETW is an honor to the tag division - they are definitely valuable.
Clubbing, dancing, pretending they're cool, dancing, and more dancing.....this describes ETW's newest triple threat. Three friends (perhaps reeeeally good friends?) Boogie Brad, Boogie Chad, and Boogie Tad got just a little tired of the dying club scene and decided to bring that energy and enthusiasm to the wrestling world. Not to be judged by their overly loud clothing and questionable fashion taste, the three Boogie Boyz actually function very well together in two and three man competition. All three are extremely agile, athletic, and surprisingly skilled, but perhaps their best attribute is that they are damned entertaining. Isn't that what this "sport" is about these days? On top of that, the Boogie Boyz have great chemistry between the three of them and I don't think anyone would be surprised to see Brad, Tad, or Chad (or all three) holding tag team gold in the very near future.
Assassin. Little more can be said about this incredibly mysterious individual. No one knows where he came from, but it is obvious why he is here - to clean up the unwanted and unused miscellaneous talent that are just floating around in ETW. He doesn't speak, doesn't show emotion, and doesn't care one bit about his opponents. Armed with the finisher to end all finishers (the career-killing neck snap), Afax is a high-energy destruction machine who will beat you before you even realize you're fighting him. Watch out for this killer - or it may be too late.
