Paul Heyman: I know you’re all probably wondering why ECW is FINALLY back, so I’m going to tell you, and I’m going to cut to the chase. You see, I don’t have to have a twenty five minute segment to get my point across like good old Vinnie Mac, oh no! You see, on January 13th, 2001 ECW held what everyone thought would be the last show. Everyone...from Joey here...to all the boys in the back...to the entire professional wrestling industry, they all thought ECW was dead and buried. Everyone thought that ECW had closed it’s doors for good. And after years of the WWF stealing our ideas, stealing our EXTREME spirt, and robbing us of our talent, I can’t blame anyone who thought those things. To tell you the truth, I thought it was dead too. There was no way I could pull it out of the hole that had been dug. So Vince McMahon, being the business man he is, offered me a position with the WWF which I accepted. From that position, I worked my ass off to get former ECW stars the recognition they deserved in the WWF. Hell, they worked their asses off here in ECW and for not a huge salary...they deserved it. What I soon found out is that what Vince says, GOES. Vince has the most voice in any subject, and he has the final say. You know what else I found out? I found out that no matter how hard you try to convince the man of something, he doesn’t listen!! HIS MASSIVE EGO TAKES CONTROL! He doesn’t care about his wrestlers, he doesn’t care about the fans, all he cares about is him. HIM! HIM! HIM! The most important thing I found out about Vince McMahon is that TALENT DOESN’T MATTER TO HIM! He doesn’t care if someone can wrestle their ass off day in, day out. All he cares about is whether that wrestler can make him money! Yet, he’s not even willing to give talent television time to find out if they’re money makers or not! Let me say this...FUCK YOU VINCE! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOUR EGO! FUCK YOUR MONEY! FUCK YOUR WWF! ECW IS BACK AND THERE’S NOT A GOD DAMNED THING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT!

Paul Heyman: I guess I still haven’t answered the question at hand though. Yes, ECW is back and better than ever. Here’s why...I’m usually not a gambler. I figure I don’t need to take chances with my money that I don’t need to. One night this thought popped into my head though, and it got me dreaming. So...I figured, what the hell!? I went out and bought a lottery ticket. Wednesday night I flipped on the television, because of course Vince wasn’t putting me on TV. What do you know!? PAUL E. FUCKING HEYMAN WON THE LOTTERY!!! Not only did I win...I WON BIIIIIIG! A few nights later I showed up at the WWF tapings and I gathered many of my former ECW stars, and even some new wrestlers who I thought would be beneficial. After all, Vince doesn’t care about talent. I decided that since he doesn’t care, I’ll just SUCK THE TALENT OUT OF THE GOD DAMNED WWF! Before Vince realized what was happening, I had my new roster, and he was out thirty plus "WWF" superstars!!!

::More "E-C-DUB" chants start!::

Paul Heyman: Now, to clear up the title situations, I’ve constructed tournaments for the ECW World Title, the ECW Television Title, the ECW Tag Team Titles, and in honor of Vinnie Mac...the ECW INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE! Hows that Vince!? Do you like that!? Feel different doesn’t? For once, you’re not the one doing the slapping...I’m the one SLAPPING YOU IN THE FACE EXTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING STYLE!

::The very verbal ECW crowd starts a "VINCE SUUUUCKS!" chant!::

Paul Heyman: With that all cleared up...welcome us back...because E-C-W is back and BETTER THAN EVER!

::The ECW Theme hits the speakers and Heyman drops the mic, leaving to a chorus of "E-C-DUB!" chants::

::End of clip::

::Backstage...Francine sees Raven on his way back to his locker room and runs to catch up with him::

Francine: Raven! Wait up!

::Francine nears Raven::

Francine: Okay look, this may seem out of the blue...but this whole resurrection of ECW thing has gotten me thinking. You know as well as I do that there are tons of possibilities for the both of us now.

Raven: Indeed...

::The two stop outside of Raven’s locker room::

Francine: As I said, I was thinking. And I know that we haven’t exactly had the best past or anything. I know you haven’t exactly had your best luck with women...and I haven’t had the best path with men. But I was thinking...and hoping...that maybe you’d give...US, a chance...

::Francine just stands there, motionless, waiting eagerly for a response from Raven. Raven gives her a strange sort of look::

Francine: Ohhhh no no no...not like that. Not US like that, no. That’s not what I meant. I meant that...not to sound egotistical...but I think I have a lot I can offer you.

::Raven stares coldly at Francine who looks a little bit frightened of Raven’s response. Raven grabs the knob of the door and opens it, ushering Francine into his locker room. Tommy Dreamer and Stevie Richards act like they weren’t listening to the conversation as they back away from the door::

Joey Styles: It looks as if Raven is going to hear Francine out.

Chase Cassidy: He’s going to do more than that to her, that’s for sure!

Joey Styles: Knock it off Cassidy!

Chase Cassidy: What!? Did you not hear what she said!? She said she has A LOT to offer him. Mhmm...she wants to get at the Raven’s pecker!

Joey Styles: Oh good lord...NEXT UP we have...A MATCH! The winner of this match will face Kid Kash right here next week for the ECW Television Title!

::"Sun Shining Down On Me" by Jackyl hits and E.Z. Money walks onto the stage with Chris Hamrick by his side. He struts to the ring wearing his suspenders, bow-tie, and sequin cowboy hat, then strips them off for the booing fans::

::"Hit Me With Your Best Shot" by Pat Benetar plays and out comes Nova to a huge ovation. He runs to the ring, but Chris Hamrick meets him head-on with a suicide dive through the ropes! E.Z. Money gets onto the ring apron and waits for Nova to get to his feet. He hits a huge Asai moonsault knocking both Nova and Hamrick down! Money rolls Nova back in the ring. He stands over Nova and bumps and grinds a little bit, then starts choking him. The referee makes him break the hold, but Money goes back to it again. He breaks it a second time, gets up, and bounces off the ropes. He runs toward Nova, flips in the air, and lands a huge legdrop! 1...2...Nova kicks out! He pulls Nova up and backs him into the corner. SLAP! Money nails a hard knife-edge chop, then sends Nova across the ring into the opposite corner. E.Z. Money runs, does a handspring, then drives the back of his elbow into Nova's face! Money goes for a powerbomb, but Nova counters with a hurricanrana over the top rope!::

Joey Styles: OH MY GOD!

Chase Cassidy: Oh no! Someone, quick, get the medics! Make sure E.Z. Money isn't broken! Did you hear him hit that concrete!?

Joey Styles: YES! Nova is back up now, getting onto the apron...

::Nova climbs to the top turnbuckle and waits. E.Z. Money pulls himself up using the guardrails, still in a daze. He turns around and Nova splashes him off the top turnbuckle!! It takes a minute, but Nova gets up and rolls Money back into the ring. He doens't go for the cover though. Instead he waits for E.Z. Money to get up. He hooks Money from behind and drives him to the mat with the Spin Doctor. 1...2...Money kicks out! Nova then locks on the figure four! E.Z. Money tries to make it to the ropes, but can't seem to. While the referee isn't looking, Chris Hamrick grabs his hands and pulls him to the ropes. The referee makes Nova break the hold. Money uses the turnbuckles to get to his feet. He turns around and Nova runs at him. He hooks Money by the head, and using the turnbuckles, he swings around and plants Money with his special ddt. Nova signals that it's the end and pulls Money back to his feet. He gets E.Z. Money on his back and nails the Kryptonite Krunch! 1...2...::

Chase Cassidy: NO! NO! He kicks out!

Joey Styles: I can't believe it! He didn't kick out! Chris Hamrick broke up the count! That's not fair at all!

Chase Cassidy: What? ...I...I just don't know what you're talking about Joseph. You must be seeing things again.

::Nova lays the punches in to Hamrick, then hits the Novacaine. E.Z. Money rolls out onto the ring apron and gets to his feet. Nova turns around and Money flips over the top rope taking Nova's head off with the Moneyclip! Nova quickly gets to his feet and kicks Money in the gut making him double over. He goes for a sunset flip, but Money catches him on his back and plants him with the Money in the Bank! 1...2...3!::

Chase Cassidy: That's it! It's over! WOOHOO! Money goes on! Joseph, you're looking at our next Television Champion!

Joey Styles: God help us all if that happens...Kid Kash...if you're listening, we need you now more than ever! You've got to win that Television Title now! E.Z Money...UGH

::Nova is laid out in the ring. E.Z. Money sits on the top turnbuckle while Chris Hamrick climbs up behind him. He gets on Money's shoulders and leaps off with a HUGE legdrop drilling Nova! Money and Hamrick then proceed to stomp the hell out of Nova. "He’s got herpes!" chants break out toward E.Z. Money! Kid Kash comes running out and makes the save, knocking both Money and Hamrick out of their boots and out of the ring::

::Taylor Matheney, woman finalist of the first Tough Enough, walks into the men's locker room. Josh Mathews, also from Tough Enough, is sitting there. He seems surprised to see her and jumps up. They hug, being happy to see each other::

Josh: You're here too!?

Taylor: YES!! I'm so excited! I can't wait to start wrestling!

Josh: Same here!

Taylor: It's great to see you again!

Josh: The last time we spoke was at the finals where we were robbed.

Taylor: Yeah, the WWF OBVIOUSLY wasn't looking for the best wrestlers...

Josh: But you know...it didn't turn out so bad...

Both: We're in ECW!

::The two slap high fives and smile as a few guys in the locker room just stare at them::

Taylor: I'm actually glad we didn't win. I mean look at Nidia and Maven...

Josh: They've done a lot with Maven, although he doesn't deserve it.

Taylor: And Nidia!? She's nowhere to be seen! So after all of that, we actually came out on top.

Josh: Have you seen Tough Enough 2? Jesus...

Taylor: Yeah...I haven't watched since they kicked Danny off.

Josh: Again, they're not looking for talent.

Taylor: The show is more like the Real World now than anything having to do with wrestling. It's so...MTV...

Josh: And they say we didn't deserve the opportunity we got...look at the TE2 contestants!

::Jamie Knoble interjects himself into the conversation::

Jamie Knoble: Oh did they? Did "they" tell you that you two didn't deserve the opportunities that you got?

Josh: Yes, they did...

Jamie Knoble: Well you know what?

::He pokes Taylor in the sternum::

Taylor: What?

Jamie Knoble: THEY WERE RIGHT! You two deserve nothin'! NOTHIN' AT ALL! You little sissy, cry baby, teeny-boppers have no business in the world of professional wrestlin'! You don't deserve anything but a job at McDonalds. I worked my ass off for YEARS and I've hardly gotten anything. Everything you guys have gotten has been handed to you! Oh, you poor little babies! You got trained by credible sources! You got to live in a mansion! You got to meet and wrestle with WWF superstars! WAAAH! WAAAH! Quit your cryin'!

Taylor: I don't think we were talking to you...

Josh: And I don't think we've met...I'm Josh Mathews...

Taylor: Taylor Matheney...

::The two hold out their hands and Knoble slaps them away::

Jamie Knoble: I'm Jamie "By God" Knoble, and I DON'T GIVE A DAMN WHO YOU ARE! I could care less that you weren't talkin' to me! There's a little thing around here that we call RESPECT...and you're going to show respect for me...OR I'M GOIN' TO BEAT IT INTO YOU BOTH!

Josh: We didn't disrespect anyone though!

Taylor: If we did, we didn't mean to. Lighten up a little!

Jamie Knoble: Lighten up a little? LIGHTEN UP!? How can I lighten up when you two are here tryin' to steal my spotlight! You're just comin' into this business! What have you had to do!? What dues have you had to pay!? You've gotten everything handed to you...but I'll tell you what...MY JOB isn't going to be one of those things. You can't just come in here and take up my television time!

Taylor: We didn't, and we aren't trying to!

::Knoble slaps Taylor across the face knocking her down. Josh then starts to lay into Knoble until other wrestlers break it up. As they're pulling Knoble out of the room...::

Jamie Knoble: Get ready because I'm callin' you both out! I'ma get me a partner and we'll see you two cry babies in the ring! My name is Jamie BY GOD Knoble and you will never forget it!

::Josh checks on Taylor::

Chase Cassidy: It's about time!

Joey Styles: It's about time for what!?

Chase Cassidy: It's about time someone told those two Tough Enough rejects how it is!

Joey Styles: Cut it out Chase, they were just minding their own business. If Jamie..."By God"...Knoble would do the same, there wouldn't be a problem.

Chase Cassidy: It's not his fault they're trying to take his spotlight and his job!

Joey Styles: They're not! It's not their fault that he's jealous, egotistical, and paranoid!

::"The Zoo" by Bruce Dickinson hits and out comes the Beast from the East, Bam Bam Bigelow! The fans give him a warm reception as he goes to the ring::

::"CHRISTIAN! CHRISTIAN!" The self-proclaimed "Diamond in the Rough" Christian comes out onto stage. The fans boo him and he yells at them, but then lets them boo. He makes the referee make Bam Bam go to the opposite side of the ring before he gets in and the bell rings::

Joey Styles: Christian is giving up quite a bit of weight to Bam Bam Bigelow...

Chase Cassidy: Pfft...big, small, fat, skinny, Christian can take them all! He's the Diamond in the Rough!

Joey Styles: Right...

::Christian goes for a clothesline but Bam Bam Bigelow ducks. Christian bounces off the ropes and hits a clothesline which has no effect on Bigelow. He bounces off the ropes once again and nails a crossbody block onto Bam Bam, but Christian just bounces right off. As he gets to his knees Bam Bam stomps on his head. Bam Bam pulls Christian up and bodyslams him back to the mat. Bigelow bounces off the ropes, then drops down with a headbutt into Christian's chest. 1...2...Christian kicks out. Bam Bam whips Christian into the corner, then follows it up with a huge running splash. Christian stumbles out and Bigelow whips him into the ropes. As Christian bounces off the ropes, he grabs hold and slides under the bottom to the outside. He grabs a chair and slides back in. Bam Bam is showboating for the crowd and Christian hits him in the back with the chair! It seems to have no effect on Bigelow! Christian bounces off the ropes and goes for another chairshot, but Bigelow lifts him up and tosses him to the concrete on the outside!::

Joey Styles: Oh my god!

Chase Cassidy: NO! He can't do that! Someone! Quick! Come get Christian before he gets back in there and really busses a cap on Bigelow! Hurry!

Joey Styles: Bam Bam Bigelow is seemingly invincible! Christian hasn't been able to hurt him yet!

Chase Cassidy: Just wait...just you wait Joseph! Bigelow stands no chance against the Diamond in the Rough!

::"E-C-DUB! E-C-DUB!" chants break out. Bigelow rolls to the outside and charges at Christian. Christian catches him with a drop toe hold sending him face first into the barricade. Christian then proceeds to assault Bigelow with a chair. He drives it into his spine and kidneys several times before he rolls him back in the ring. 1...2...Bigelow kicks out amazingly! Christian stands up and screams at the referee. The referee tells him that Bigelow got the shoulder up, but Christian insists that it was a three count. Christian kicks the referee then drops him to the mat with the Unprettier! Christian turns around and Bam Bam is waiting for him. He picks Christian up and drives him down headfirst with Greetings From Asbury Park! He makes the cover! A new referee runs out! 1...2...NO! Kurt Angle hops the guardrail and pulls the ref out, stopping the count! Bam Bam gets up and yells at Angle. Christian gets a chair and cracks Bigelow in the back of the head with it. Then he nails the Unprettier right onto the chair! He makes the cover and the original ref makes the count...1...2...3!::

Joey Styles: No! This is robbery! This just isn't right! It was two against one!

Chase Cassidy: All is fair in love and war...

Joey Styles: Bullshit Chase! Pardon my language...

Chase Cassidy: Joseph! I'm ashamed of you! This is a wholesome family show! What is wrong with you!?

Joey Styles: Let's cut to the back...

::Jamie Knoble finds Ivory coming out of the women’s locker room::

Jamie Knoble: Hey Ivory! Look, I need your help.

Ivory: You do...do you?

Jamie Knoble: Yeah, you know those two spoiled twirps from Tough Enough, Taylor and Josh?

Ivory: Yeah, what about them?

Jamie Knoble: They were talking about your show, Tough Enough 2, and how bad it is! That’s disrespect! They don’t deserve to be in this business in the first place! Tonight, I need you to be my partner against them...so we can beat the respect into them!

Ivory: I can’t believe those little cry babies...I can’t believe that. I’ll be happy to team with you. We’ll show them how tough this business is...they’re not Tough Enough anyway!

::Knoble and Ivory grin evilly::

::"Playing God" by Reveille blasts through speakers throughout the arena and Mikey Whipwreck and Yoshihiro Tajiri come out to a huge ovation. Following behind them closely is the Sinister Minister, dressed completely in red and carrying his cane. They slowly make their way to the ring, laughing hysterically::

::"MY NAME IS KIIIIIIIIIID!" Kid Kash comes out to his music by Kid Rock. Following him is Super Crazy. They slap the hands of fans all around ringside, then get in the ring and shake hands with Mikey and Tajiri::

Joey Styles: What a display of sportsmenship...something we don't see too often anymore.

Chase Cassidy: Pfft! Who needs sportsmenship!? It has no place in the business anymore, that's why we dont see it too often.

Joey Styles: In any case...this is Super Crazy's second match tonight. This match is also first round in the Tag Team Tournament.

Chase Cassidy: Whoop-dee-freakin'-doo!

::Tajiri charges at Super Crazy who tosses him through the ropes to the outside. Crazy goes out onto the ring apron and leaps off, landing a huge Asai moonsault on Tajiri. Mikey Whipwreck hits a hurricanrana on Kid Kash in the ring. He bounces off the ropes and runs toward Tajiri and Crazy. He throws himself over the top rope and takes them both out! Once the three of them get up, Kid Kash jumps off the top turnbuckle with a twisting senton taking all three of them down! "E-C-DUB! E-C-DUB!" chants start up. Kid Kash pulls a table out from under the ring and props one end up on the ring apron, the other on the guardrail. Tajiri and Whipwreck are getting up and Kash runs at them. They pick him up and drop him on his throat on the guardrail with a double pancake! Super Crazy clocks Whipwreck from behind with a chair knocking him down. He rolls Tajiri into the ring and puts Whipwreck onto the table which was propped up earlier. He slides in the ring and drives Tajiri into the mat with his flying tornado ddt. He then ascends to the top turnbuckle and dives off with a moonsault driving Whipwreck through the table! "E-C-DUB! E-C-DUB!"::

Joey Styles: OH MY GOD! What a moonsault!

Chase Cassidy: Indeed...that looked quite devastating.

::Kid Kash pulls Whipwreck up and rolls him in the ring. Crazy gets in and covers him...1...2...NO! Tajiri gets up and dropkicks Crazy in the face breaking the count. He whips Crazy into the corner and runs at him. Crazy tries to duck out of the way, but Tajiri catches him with his legs and locks in the tarantula! Kid Kash breaks the hold by dropping an elbow onto Tajiri's head on the apron. Tajiri falls to the floor. Crazy tags in Kash as Whipwreck is getting to his feet. Kash climbs to the top turnbuckle and nails a flying hurricanrana on Whipwreck! Kid Kash gets off and hits a springboard twisting legdrop...1...2...Mikey Whipwreck barely kicks out! Kid Kash says that's it and pulls Whipwreck to his feet. He locks in a double underhook and lifts Mikey up for the Money Maker. Out of nowhere, Tajiri hits a stick dropkick to Kash's knee. Kash falls backwards and Whipwreck lands on him. 1...2...Super Crazy breaks the count. Tajiri jumps onto Crazy's shoulders and throws him over the top rope with a hurricanrana. As Tajiri fights with Kid Kash, Whipwreck goes to the outside and brings a table in. He sets it up near the corner. Kid Kash kicks Tajiri in the stomach making him double over. Kash jumps onto the middle rope and bounces off, rolling over Tajiri's back and throwing him with an armdrag! Super Crazy pulls Tajiri out to ringside. Kash kicks Whipwreck in the stomach hunching him over. He springs off the top rope, spins, and catches Mikey with a sunset flip...1...2...Whipwreck barely gets the shoulder up. Kash goes to the top rope but before he can do anything, Whipwreck crotches him. He climbs up and nails the Whippersnapper off the top rope and through the table on Kid Kash! "E-C-DUB! E-C-DUB!" chants break out. 1...2...3!!::

Joey Styles: Mikey Whipwreck and Yoshihiro Tajiri win the match and advance in the Tag Tournament!!

::Backstage...Francine, Tommy Dreamer, Stevie Richards, and Raven are talking in their dressing room::

Francine: Oh, hey! Tommy...Stevie...I've got a little surprise for you! Stevie Richards: SWEET!

Raven: Calm yourself Stevie...

::Francine walks over to her duffle bag, bending over slowly at the waist...her backside toward the guys in the room. She pops back up with some papers in her hand. She walks back over, hands one paper to Richards and one to Dreamer, then sits back down in her chair::

Tommy Dreamer: What's this?

Francine: Well read and find out!

::They read for a moment, Francine is seemingly eager about something::

Stevie Richards: You've gotten us into the Tag Team Tournament!?!?

Francine: YES!! All you have to do is sign those contracts!

Stevie Richards: SWEET! Tommy! You and me! Me and you! That's us!

Tommy Dreamer: That's great...but...

Stevie Richards: No buts...no buts Dreamer!

Francine: But what Tommy?

Tommy Dreamer: Francine, Cyrus said that tournament was full. He wasn't letting any other teams enter. How did you get us--

Francine: Oh...well let's just say that I used some of my more feminine qualities. Cyrus can't stand up to a woman, you all should know that!

::They laugh as Dreamer and Richards sign the contracts entering into the Tag Tournament...::

Chase Cassidy: WHAT!? HOW!? No way! She must have brainwashed Cyrus! There is no way someone as credible and business-like as Cyrus would give her those contracts! No way Jose!

Joey Styles: I don't know who you're calling Jose, but I'm certainly not surprised. It looks as if Francine teaming up with Raven, Dreamer, and Richards is certainly having it's perks!

Chase Cassidy: Well, their happiness won't last long. If my calculations are correct...their match in the tournament is tonight. The only spot left is against...well...it doesn't look as if Dreamer and Richards stand the slightest chance.

Joey Styles: Who are they facing?

Chase Cassidy: Joey Matthews and Christian York!! They stand no chance at all!

Joey Styles: Um...Chase...Matthews and York are fairly new here...Dreamer and Richards have A LOT of experience. But I guess you're entitled to your own opinion...I wouldn't hold your breath though.

Chase Cassidy: I AM entitled to my own opinion, thank you very much Joseph. I plan on stating my opinions as openly and often as I can.

Joey Styles: You already do, unfortunately.

::"Sidekick" by Rancid hits and out come Josh Mathews and Taylor Matheney from Tough Enough. They get a pretty nice reaction as they make their way to the ring::

::"Wanna Be Martyr" by Full Devil Jacket blares through the speakers and Jamie Knoble comes out with Ivory by his side. They talk trash all the way to the ring, yelling at Taylor and Josh::

Joey Styles: Looks like Taylor and Ivory will be starting this match out.

Chase Cassidy: WOOHOO! Nothing like two broads going at it!

Joey Styles: I’m so glad you’re always politically correct Chase...I don’t know what public relations would do if you weren’t...

Chase Cassidy: I know!

Joey Styles: Sarcasm Chase...sarcasm...

::Ivory extends her hand to Taylor wanting her to shake it. Taylor looks skeptical and looks to Josh for help. Josh just shrugs at her. Ivory clubs her in the back of the head with a forearm. She bounces Taylor off the ropes and meets her with a kick to the stomach. Ivory grabs Taylor by the hair and slams her face first into the mat. Taylor tries to tag in Josh, but Ivory pulls her away from her corner and starts stomping the hell out of her. Ivory pulls her up, backs her into the corner, and starts chopping away. Taylor eventually collapses and Ivory starts choking her. Ivory tags in Jamie Knoble who starts to stomp on Taylor much like Ivory was doing. He picks her up and snapmares her over. He jumps over her, grabbing her hair in the process, and snapping her neck forward. 1...2...Taylor kicks out. He pulls her up and whips her off the ropes. He goes for a clothesline, but she ducks and rolls him up..1...2...kick out! They both get up and Taylor nails a Russian Legsweep on Knoble! She makes the hot tag to Josh! Josh comes in with a head of steam and knocks Knoble down with a clothesline. Ivory comes in and gets hit with a clothesline as well. Josh bounces off the ropes and hits a flying headscissors on Knoble. He gets on the apron and hits a springboard legdrop onto Knoble...1...2...Jamie Knoble kicks out! Josh pulls him up and they both bounce off the ropes. They connect with a double crossbody block! They crawl to their respective corners and tag in their female counterparts. Taylor and Ivory run at each other. Ivory goes for a clothesline, but Taylor ducks and hits a neckbreaker. She waits for Ivory to get up, then rolls her up. Ivory reverses into her own pin...1...2...Josh breaks the count. Ivory then ddts Josh and holds Taylor for Jamie Knoble. He goes to superkick her, but she dodges and he nails Ivory! Taylor hits a fall-forward Russian Legsweep on Knoble, then covers Ivory! 1...2...3!::

Joey Styles: What a quick matchup! Taylor and Josh barely get the win, but proved their point, that's for sure!

Chase Cassidy: HOW DID THAT HAPPEN!? They proved nothing! They were just lucky that's all!

Joey Styles: Either way, Ivory and Jamie Knoble got what was coming to them for picking on poor Josh and Taylor who meant no harm at all!

::Dawn Marie is backstage fixing her hair and looking in a mirror near the wardrobe section. Cyrus, Nash, and Rhino are seen in the background. Cyrus and Rhino disappear into his office. Nash comes up behind Dawn Marie and grabs her. She shrieks in surprise. He picks her up with one arm and grabs her microphone in the other::

Dawn Marie: HEY! Put me down you...you...you meanie!! Let me go! Get your greasy hands off me!

Kevin Nash: It's time for you to do your job little missy...

::Nash shoves the microphone into Dawn Marie's mouth to shut her up. He carries her into Cyrus' office, puts her back on her feet, and takes the microphone out of her mouth::

Dawn Marie: Yeah, you better let me go! Yuck! Your greasy, clammy hands CAN'T be good for my skin!

Rhino: INTERVIEW! NOW!

Kevin Nash: It's your lucky day...whatever your name is. You get to interview Cyrus!

Cyrus: Her name is Dawn Marie, Kev...

::Cyrus smiles at Dawn::

Dawn Marie: That's me!

::Dawn Marie bounces a little and smiles::

Kevin Nash: Psst...start the interview now...

Dawn Marie: Excuse me, don't you know how to treat a lady!?

Cyrus: What are my thoughts on the return of ECW you ask Dawn?

Dawn Marie: I didn't ask tha--

::Nash covers her mouth::

Cyrus: I think it's great that ECW is back. I mean, all of my fans must have just about died...you know, not seeing me on TV for such a long period of time. Lack of Cyrus is detrimental to the health you know!

::Dawn pries Nash's hand off her mouth::

Dawn Marie: Stop! You're going to smear my lipstick and ruin my beautiful complection! How dare you!

Cyrus: Yes, yes I am THRILLED to be the COMMISSIONER of ECW Dawn...I'm completely ecstatic! Thanks for asking.

Dawn Marie: What? I didn't ask that eithe--

Cyrus: Oh, don't you worry your pretty little self. I'll be COMPLETELY fair! After all, what good would a commissioner be if he didn't treat everyone fairly? And I've got PLENTY of uses for you my dear, your job isn't in jeopardy. There are others though who may be given the boot in the weeks to come. But I must say this...if anyone, and you know I mean ANYONE...gets in my way or interferes in my business...they will have HELL to pay! You're welcome for my time Dawn Marie, you look forward to conversing with me in the future. Good bye!

::Nash shoves Dawn Marie out of the door and closes it::

::"Scapegoat" by Fear Factory plays and the fans cheer as the New F'n Show Jerry Lynn comes out. He slaps the hands of the fans on his way to the ring, then poses for them to snap a few pictures::

::"Breathe" by Prodigy hits and Al Snow walks onto stage with Head in hand. He gets a pretty mixed reaction. A "We want Head!" chant breaks out as he gets in the ring::

::Al Snow immediately tries to hit Lynn with Head, but misses. Lynn knocks Head out of Al's hands and whips him into the corner. He charges at Al and jumps onto him, rolling backwards with a monkey flip. Al Snow lands on his feet though! Lynn gets up and walks right into a snap suplex by Al Snow. Snow hits another one then floats over...1...2...Jerry Lynn kicks out. Al Snow bounces him off the ropes and nails a back body drop. He bounces off the ropes himself and drops his shin into the throat of Lynn. He gets to his knees and locks in a sleeper hold. The fans eventually rally behind Jerry Lynn and Lynn escapes from the hold. He sends Snow bouncing off the ropes, but Snow catches him with another sleeper hold. This time Lynn picks Snow up and drops him with a belly to back suplex. Both men get to their feet and Al goes for a clothesline. Lynn ducks and goes behind Al, locking onto him. He hits three consecutive German Suplexes and makes the cover. 1...2...Al Snow barely kicks out! Lynn goes for a punch, but Al hooks his hand under his arm. Lynn goes for a punch with the other hand, but Al hooks that too. Al Snow then starts headbutting Lynn like crazy. He bounces Lynn off the ropes as if he was going to go for a rock bottom. He lifts Lynn up and slams him down into a sitting position. 1...2...Jerry Lynn kicks out!::

Joey Styles: What a unique move by Al Snow! And what a fast paced match this is!

::Al Snow picks Lynn up in suplex position looking for the Snowplow, but Lynn flips over and gets out of it. He elbows Snow in the back of the head, then jumps up and sits on the top turnbuckle. He leaps off with a flying bulldog on Snow! 1...2...Al Snow barely gets the shoulder up. They get up and Al sends Lynn off the ropes. Lynn comes back and hooks on a crucifix into a pinning predicament...1...2...Al Snow kicks out again! Lynn whips Snow toward the ropes but Snow counters. Lynn bounces off the ropes and knees Al Snow in the gut. He picks Al up and drops him with the cradle piledriver! 1...2...3!::

Joey Styles: Jerry Lynn picks up the win!

Chase Cassidy: Hey, that rhymes!

Joey Styles: That...it does...I've been told that the Impact Players are waiting in the back!

::Backstage...Justin Credible and Lance Storm and standing in a locker room::

Lance Storm: Last week...Justin and I...we beat Hot Commodity in the FIRST...match in the Tag Team Tournament. We beat Hot Commodity in the FIRST...match of the resurrected ECW, on the FIRST...showing of ECW Hardcore TV. We became the FIRST...winners in this "new" era of ECW. We became the FIRST...Tag Team to win a match.

Justin Credible: With SOOOO many FIRSTS...already under our belts, why not just add another one? Well, whether you like us...or you don't...it will happen...it HAS to happen...

Lance Storm: We will become the FIRST...ECW Tag Team Champions. We will become the FIRST...to bring the prestige those titles once had...BACK! And we will become the FIRST...Tag Team here in ECW to destroy all the competition...ALL of it...

Justin Credible: Because that's not just the COOLEST...that's not just the BEST!

Lance Storm: That's from CALGARY...Alberta, Canada!

Justin Credible: And that my friends...IS JUUUUUUUUST INCREEEEEEDIBLE!!!

::The two pose for the camera::

Chase Cassidy: What was that all about?

Joey Styles: You're not too familiar with the Impact Players, are you Chase?

Chase Cassidy: It doesn't matter, I'm familiar with them now! They're awesome!

Joey Styles: You've only seen ONE of their matches! How would you know?

Chase Cassidy: Believe me...I have a gift...

Joey Styles: You have something alright, I'm just not sure if it's a gift or some sort of disorder.

Chase Cassidy: HEY!

::"Come Out and Play" by the Offspring hits and the fans go absolutely nuts! Tommy Dreamer and Stevie Richards come out on stage full of energy and Francine walks out to a huge ovation as well. They rush to the ring::

::"More Than You Are" by Grinspoon plays and out come Joey Matthews and Christian York to a mixed reaction. They take their time getting to the ring, not anxious to get in there with Dreamer and Richards::

::Dreamer and Richards pose for the fans on the turnbuckles and Matthews and York take advantage. York dumps Dreamer to the outside, and Matthews hits a sitdown powerbomb on Richards! 1...2...Richards kicks out. York and Matthews bounces Richards off the ropes. They catch him with a double hiptosses, but hang onto him as he flips over. They lift him up and slam him down to the mat with a stiff double powerbomb. The referee makes York get in the corner as Matthews makes the cover on Richards. 1...2...Stevie kicks out! Stevie mounts a comeback with lefts and rights. He crotches Matthews on the top turnbuckle, then quickly hits a superplex. 1...2...Matthews kicks out. Stevie pulls Matthews up and immediately drops him with a flatliner. Stevie backs into the corner and stomps on the mat calling for the Stevie Kick! He goes for it as Matthews gets to his feet. Matthews ducks and hits a hangman's neckbreaker. He then makes the tag to York as quick as he can. Matthews holds Richards to the mat. York jumps onto the top rope and hits a springboard legdrop onto Stevie Richards. He pulls Richards up and bounces him off the ropes. He kicks him right in the nose with a wheel kick. York bounces off the ropes and drops himself onto Richards with a flipping senton. 1...2...Richards kicks out again! York quickly tags in Matthews while Richards is still down. York sits on the top turnbuckle, and Matthews climbs up in front of him. York picks Matthews up in suplex position and drops him onto Richards! 1...2...Richards barely kicks out. Matthews lets Richards crawl towards Dreamer in the corner. Right before he's in range to tag Tommy, Matthews pulls Stevie away. He bounces off the ropes and drops an elbow. He then whips Richards into the corner near York. Matthews distracts the referee and York chokes Richards!::

Joey Styles: I can't believe this! Matthews and York are playing dirty! What has gotten into them!? This isn't like them at all!

Chase Cassidy: What has gotten into them Joseph!? What do you think!? COMMON SENSE has gotten into it. I know you don't know much about that though, but I'll explain later.

Joey Styles: Gee, thanks.

Chase Cassidy: Joey Matthews and Christian York have finally figured out that winning is winning. Who cares if you BEND the rules a little!? A win is a win Joseph...

Joey Styles: BEND the rules huh? Yeah right...but you are right. A win is a win no matter how you get it.

::Tommy Dreamer tries to get in but the referee stops him. This allows Matthews to pick Richards up in a body scissors. York flies off the top rope and hits a huge legdrop! Matthews makes the cover...1...2...Dreamer breaks the count! Christian York hooks Dreamer, reaching over the top rope. He suplexes him down to the concrete floor. As York gets in the ring, Richards nails a low blow on Matthews. Richards bounces off the ropes and the team of Matthews and York double hiptoss him over the top rope onto Dreamer! They bounces off the set of ropes farthest away from where Dreamer and Richards are on the outside. Simultaneously, they both go for suicide dives to the outside. Dreamer and Richards both dive out of the way and Matthews and York both go head first into the guardrails! "E-C-DUB! E-C-DUB!" chants break out::

Joey Styles: OOOH MY GOOOOD!!!

Chase Cassidy: Oh...my...

Joey Styles: They both went head first right into those steel guard rails! They may have broken their necks!

Chase Cassidy: Oh no...they're not moving! Quick! Medics! Get your lazy asses out here! We have an emergency! CODE RED! CODE RED!

Joey Styles: Code Red!?

Chase Cassidy: CODE RED!

::Richards pulls the limp Joey Matthews up and takes him into the ring. He drops down and makes the cover...1...2...::

Chase Cassidy: NO! NO!

Joey Styles: WHAT IS THIS!?

::Rhino breaks the count and Kevin Nash gets in the ring with him. Cyrus is at ringside directing traffic. Dreamer rolls into the ring and he and Stevie try to fight off Rhino and Nash. Stevie superkicks Rhino over the top rope. He turns around and walks right into a huge stiff big boot by Nash. Rhino grabs Francine by the hair on the outside distracting Dreamer. He turns around Nash kicks Dreamer in the stomach making him double over in pain. He lifts Dreamer up and hits the Jacknife Powerbomb! He gets out of the ring as Joey Matthews gets in. Matthews and York pull Richards to his feet and drive him head first into the mat with their devastating double implant ddt! 1...2...3!!::

Joey Styles: NO! I can't believe it! This is horrible!

Chase Cassidy: WOOHOO! I told you! I TOLD YOU JOSEPH! Joey Matthews and Christian York, the "newcomers" advance in the Tag Team Title Tournament!! YAY!

Joey Styles: I can't believe this! This can't be! Dreamer and Richards have been robbed! It was four against two! Why did Nash and Rhino help them win!?

::Nash, Rhino, and Cyrus get in the ring and hold up the arms of Matthews and York::

Chase Cassidy: I think THAT...should answer your question Joseph...

::Nash, Rhino, Cyrus, Matthews, and York smile in the ring. Fade out::

Next Episode!