Disclaimer: Don't own the performers, just the idea.
Distribution: Flights.
Note: Momma's pissed...
"Tonight, on SMACKDOWN, I want to congratulate my husband, Triple H and his partner, Stone Cold Steve Austin, for giving Kane, Undertaker and Test, the beating they so richly deserve this Monday night on RAW. That should send a clear message to everyone in the WWF that we are not to be..."
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!
The disco beats of the Barbra Streisand and Donna Summers duet rang out through the arena. In the ring, Vince and Stephanie made signs to cut the music but it didn't stop as a tall woman appeared on the arm of Jonathan Coachman. The commentator couldn't look more uncomfortable as he helped the gloriously pregnant woman down the ramp. Her black hair hung in luscious curls all around her shoulders and her onyx eyes glared at the quatuor in the ring as she climbed into the ring. The Coach held the ropes for her to get into the ring then hurried to get her a microphone.
Finally, the music died down as she sat down, bringing the microphone to her mouth.
"You people should be ashamed of yourself," she sighed, "making her pregnant woman leave the comfort of her own home to set all of you straight. A damn shame really."
"You don't have to be here," Vince said, looking more and more uncomfortable.
"I don't? So I should let you beat up on my husband, the soon-to-be father of my unborn child and sit at home and do nothing? I don't think so."
"Go home Kat," Stephanie screeched, "Test put his nose where it didn't..."
"YOU should not be talking about my husband's nose considering you married Toucan Sam!"
At that, Triple H almost bounded on the grinning woman.
"You know what, little lady, if you think your being pregnant makes any damn difference to me," Austin said, "then you ain't got no idea what a rattlesnake..."
"Oh shut up! Of course you'll hurt me if you have to. But I'm not stupid Austin."
She snapped her fingers and a bevy of cops came down the ramp to surround the ring. Vince looked mad enough to spit and Stephanie's eyes shone with rage.
"You can't do this!"
"I can't? But I can, and I have and the way I look at it, your husband's been arrested, your dad's been arrested, Steve's been arrested. You want a couple of bracelets too so you can complete the family mug shot set?"
"Why you..."
"Enough," Kat sighed, pressing the fingers of her spread hand into Stephanie's face and pushing her away. "You're breathing on my unborn child."
"You little..." Stephanie screeched, jumping at Test's wife, claws out, missing her face by a few hairs.
"Officer," Kat said, dancing out of the way, "I believe that's assault, isn't it?"
"You want to press charges?" a cop asked, coming into the ring.
"Do I ever! Book her!"
"Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley," the cop said as he fastened hand cuffs on her, "you're under arrest for assaulting. You have the right to..."
"You can't do this! I'm Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley!"
"... Remain silent. You have the right to an attorney..."
Kat watched Stephanie be taken away with a smile on her lips and turned to the men who remained in the ring.
"Hunter, now you and your lovely wife can put the mug shots next to the wedding photos. Won't it be precious?"
"You're such a colossal bitch."
"Bite me! I'm pregnant, I'm hormonal and I'm on a rampage! Now, you either stay the hell away from my husband until he's a papa or you have to suffer my wrath when I'm done recuperating."
"Go home and be a god damn woman," Austin sneered, "barefoot and pregnant, the only way to be."
"I knew it!" Debra exploded, stalking down the ramp, "I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! Barefoot and pregnant, right Steve?"
"Debra, what the hell are you doing out here? Get your ass backstage!"
"No, I don't think so. You want me barefoot, pregnant, not talking back? Too bad, that ain't gonna happen!"
"Steve," Triple H growled, "control your damn wife!"
"Control me? He doesn't have the grapefruits to control me," Debra hissed, poking a long nail into Hunter's chest.
"Debra, you're making a fool of yourself. Now get backstage and wait for me," Steve said, roughly grabbing her arm and propelling her toward the outside of the ring.
"I don't think so," she snapped, jerking her arm out of his grasp. "If I were you, I'd start getting divorce tips from Vince, you'll need it."
Debra's statement and departure was accompanied by Kat's laughter and Steve, Triple H and Vince turned to her, approaching threateningly. She was still smiling at them when all three men felt a light tapping on their shoulders. They didn't even have the time to blink when Test, Kane and Undertaker started kicking their asses while a gleeful Kat watched, clapping in joy. Once he threw Triple H out of the ring, Test turned to his wife, arms crossed over his chest.
"What exactly is all this?" he asked.
"I wanted to help," she explained with a shy smile.
"You are..."
"The word you're looking for here kid," Taker said, "is pretty damn incredible."
"Thank you!"
"Thanks for getting Stephanie arrested," Kane said, "her voice was getting on my last nerve."
"That why you booted her this Sunday night?" Kat asked, smiling up at him.
"Exactly."
"And to think," Taker told Test with a sinister smile, "we wanted to marry that!"
"Ewww, gross," Test laughed as he helped his wife out of the ring.
"Tell me about it."
"So," Andrew asked his wife while he rubbed cream all over her large stomach, "why did you do it?"
"Plain and simple? I had enough."
"Enough of what?"
"Everything, Stephanie, HHH, that whole mess. I wanted them to get their asses handed to them. You three just needed a little prodding is all."
"So you used yourself as bait?"
"Yes. Don't you think it's a good idea?"
"It was an idea that scared the life out of me. I don't think I ever ran that fast."
"But you got to kick Hunter's ass."
"True."
"And I'll get you another chance to do it."
"How?"
"Well, I still haven't spoken to Shane," Kat sighed as she drifted off to sleep.