When Doctor Anya Green repeated those very words to her, Jess didn't know what to say. There was nothing to say. There were no words. But there were feelings, plenty of them, tangled in her heart, in her soul.
None of them good. There was a lot of violence in her heart. She wanted to hurt someone. She wanted to retaliate in some way. She wanted to scream, she wanted to let it all out, she wanted, as crazy as that might sound, to forget... She didn't want to remember. None of it. None of this evening. She wanted to forget what little she remembered and remember everything she had lost instead.
"So what do I do now," she asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Where to now? Where does my life take me?"
"Lord only knows," chuckled Anya nervously. "Wherever you want it to take you?"
"Back in time?"
"Except there. But the future can be a greater experience."
"Can be. Do you know that for sure?"
"No."
Jess didn't say anything for a while, focusing on a point in the ceiling.
"Do they know?"
"Who?"
"My... my parents."
"No. Not yet. I thought you might want to talk to them first. I also called a counsellor down here. She's very good."
"Send her in. I got to prepare for this."
Dr. Green squeezed Jess' hand and stepped out of the curtained area.
Test, Patty and the Warrens sat on chairs lined against the wall, waiting for her. They got up all at once, expectant looks on their faces.
"Jess isn't quite ready to see any of you right now," said Anya. "She wants to speak to a counsellor first. Maybe that'll help her deal with the overwhelming feelings she's going through right now."
The worried quartet sat back down, dejected. Test was starting to feel uncomfortable with all the looks he was getting from the Warrens.
"I think I'll be leaving for tonight," he said to Patty, loud enough for the Warrens to hear.
"Why?"
"It's not my place to be here. I barely know her after all."
"Yes but she trusts you," pleaded Patty. "She's bonded with you. Please, don't go."
Test looked at Patty's small little face, her pleading eyes and his heart softened. He looked at the Warrens and was surprised by what he saw there. Whereas Mr. Warren looked like he wanted to leap and kill him, Mrs. Warren was looking at him questioningly, as though she was willing to give him a chance to prove himself to her. In her eyes, he
saw a plea for him to stay.
"All right, I won't go right away. But I do have a phone call to make."
"Good."
Test got up and made his way out of the hospital to use his cellular phone. He called Edge right away.
"Yo Edge," he said, when his friend finally picked up.
"Who the hell is this?"
"It's Test. Listen man, I'm still in the hospital."
"With the girl from the show?"
"Yeah. Edge man, I swear this whole thing is a mess from here to eternity."
"Why?"
Test gave him a quick run-down of what had happened to Jess and his part in all of it.
"So you're stuck in Montreal indefinitely?"
"Yeah."
"Test, guy, you're going to hate me for asking, but did you?"
"What?"
"Sleep with the girl?"
"Damn it Adam, you know me better than that. I don't need to beg for sex from nobody, and I certainly ain't going to force a woman. That ain't my style."
"I just had to ask."
"It's cool. Listen, here's what I need you to do. Fill in Vince and Shane on the situation. They'll go from there. I'm at St. Luke Hospital. It's about ten minutes away from the Marriott. They can page me. I can't use my cell in the hospital anyways."
"All right. They ain't going to be happy about this. Hell, they already ain't too fond of you."
"Yeah, but this is different. This has nothing to do with work. Maybe they'd prefer the publicity mess if I'd left the girl in the street after hitting her."
"I guess. I'll get a message to them ASAP."
"Thanks. I'll call you in the morning and let you know where things stand."
Just as Edge was stepping out of his room to go down the hall to the McMahon's family suite, the elevator bell rang. He saw two men step out and head his way. Cops, he thought right away. God, they got here fast.
He nonetheless knocked on the door. When Shane opened the door, Edge was surprised to see that the whole McMahon clan was up and about.
"Edge," said Shane, "what's up?"
"I wanted to let you know about Test. He just called me."
"Good. Come on in."
"Wait," said Edge, stopping Shane from closing the door, "I don't think I'm the only one here to see you guys."
Edge nodded to the two policemen coming to a halt in front of the McMahon suite.
"Mr. McMahon?" asked Detective Steinberg.
"Yes?"
"We're the detectives who called you from downstairs. I'm Detective Steinberg and this is my partner, Detective Charpentier."
"Good evening detectives," said Shane, letting them into the suite. "I'm Shane McMahon. This is my father Vince McMahon, my sister Stephanie and Edge, a.k.a. Adam Copeland. Please have a seat."
The detectives sat in a pair of straight-back chairs surrounding a nice mahogany conference table where Vince and Stephanie already sat. Shane and Edge joined them immediately.
"Detectives," said Vince, "I know you want to tell us about tonight's sad events. If you don't mind, Mr. Copeland will sit in with us. As Mr. Martin's travelling companion, he knows him better than we do."
"Good," said Detective Charpentier, "I want you to know that this interview is a simple matter of formality. All we want to do is establish a timeline for Mr. Martin's whereabouts. We don't necessarily believe him to be guilty but we do need your help to establish his innocence."
"Good."
Edge and Stephanie encouraged each other with a small, encouraging smile whereas Shane and Vince exchanged a much more ominous look. There was a chance to get rid of Test once and for all.
Jess looked up from the non-fascinating weave of her hospital blue blanket at the young woman who now stood next to her bed. She looked very young, very inexperienced and probably younger than herself. How could she tell? How could she know who looked old or not? How could she establish that? Hell, she didn't know what she looked like. A dry chuckle escaped her lips.
"I don't even know what I look like," she muttered to herself.
"Excuse me?"
"I was just thinking about how I didn't even know what I look like. It's kind of funny. Ironic, when you think about it."
"Yes. My name is Sonia Hernandes. I'm a rape crisis counsellor with the hospital."
"Cool. My name is Jess Warren and I was raped. At least that's what they tell me."
"Your name or that you were raped?"
"Both. I don't remember either," said Jess right before her throat clogged up and she wasn't able to say another word. For the umpteenth time since the beginning of her life as a non-rememberer, Jess' hand covered her eyes as tears rolled down her cheeks.
"It's okay to cry," said Sonia. "It's a sign. That you're alive."
"I'm alive. Great. I don't remember anything of my life except this evening. And I was raped. Thank God I'm alive."
"It's traumatic. It hurts. It tears at you. Makes you feel small and weak. Like you don't matter."
Jess looked at the fuzzy shape that was Sonia through the barrage of her tears and recognized something there. She recognized a kindred spirit.
"How did..."
"...I know? Raped, three years ago. My brother's best friend."
"Was he..."
"Arrested? Prosecuted? Yeah. And I am glad to say he is still rotting in prison."
"Good. You remember your attacker. I can't remember mine."
"It's only been one night. Give it time. For now, let's deal with you. Your feelings. How you'll handle this."
"Okay."
Sonia and Jess spoke for over an hour. Jess cried a lot. Sonia cried a little. But by the time they were done, Jess felt ready for whatever life was going to throw at her. She felt ready. For her parents. Sonia came out of the area allotted to Jess and smiled at her waiting parents.
"Mr. and Mrs. Warren," she asked.
"Yes?"
"Your daughter's ready to see you now. However, treat her gently. With kid gloves. She understands who you are. She needs time to accept it. As far as she knows, life has made her a lonely soul. She has to learn to be strong alone before she can allow you to be strong for her."
"What does that mean?" asked Mrs. Warren.
"It means that you, as parents, have to do the exact opposite of what you've been doing all your lives as parents. Don't smother her. Let her be. Let her say what she has to say. Let her ask what she has to ask. The memories you have of her, with her, they no longer exist."
The Warrens looked at each other intensely for a moment. Then, their strength gathered, they looked at Sonia, nodding together.
"All right. We're ready."
Sonia led them to Jess. For the moment, her eyes were closed. But as soon as she heard the set of footsteps by her bed, she opened them.
These people were her parents. She couldn't remember them. And they seemed so worried. And from what Sonia had said, it was her they were so worried about.
"I'm so sorry," she said. "For making you so worried."
"Oh darling," said the woman, her eyes filling with tears, "It's not your fault."
"Your mother's right," said the man, somewhat gruffly. "Once we get that bastard behind bars, everything will be all right."
"First, I have to remember who did this to me."
"Honey, you don't have to cover for him. We know who raped you."
"You do?" Jess's heart flopped over in her chest. Could it be? So soon, her attacker had been found! Oh, what joy! "Who is it," she asked immediately. "Who did this to me?"
"Well, it's obvious. It's that damn deviant, Test. Can't believe that smug bastard is outside right now! Acting like he's concerned and all."
"No," she yelled, "Test did not rape me. I don't remember much but I do know that he did not do such a thing."
"Honey, you don't have to defend him. It's quite all right."
"Get out!!! Get out now!"
Mr. Warren was taken aback by his daughter's fury. He hesitated but when he saw the look in her eyes, he realised that retreat was probably his best bet. Mrs. Warren looked back at her husband as he disappeared behind the curtain. She then looked back to her daughter with a small smile.
"Honey... I mean Jess, that was wonderful."
"It was?"
"The way you stood up to your father. He took you seriously. That's good. The problem is, he doesn't see Test as a man. He sees him as a man who enjoys hitting others for pleasure, and money. But that young man seems to care about you, about what happens to you."
"He does?"
"Yes."
Jess smiled at her mother and exchanged a significative look with Sonia.
The counsellor excused herself immediately.
"Mother?"
"Yes?"
"Is that how I used to call you?" asked Jess, her voice breaking.
"Only when you're mad at me, or when you want something from me. Usually, you call me Mom, Mommy, and Bobby when you have a cold."
Jess laughed a bit and her mother joined in. Mother and daughter looked at each other, wondering what they would discover under this cover of civility.
"Mother," said Jess on a much more sober tone, "I have something to tell you."
"What is it?"
"I'm not absolutely sure Test didn't do it."
"Neither am I honey. I seriously doubt it though."
"Me too. But I don't know if I should trust him. I don't know if I should trust anybody."
"Well, I can't tell you who to trust and who not to trust. You must come to these conclusions by yourself. However, know this, whenever you need a shoulder to lean on, lean on me."
"Thank you."
"I thought you might like to see these."
Mrs. Warren dug into her purse and pulled out her wallet. She opened it and pulled out a small stack of pictures.
"I always keep these with me," she explained. "Sometimes, I like to be reminded of my most beautiful work of art." She handed the pictures to Jess, explaining them as she went along.
Through the exposition, Jess smiled and came close to tears. She saw herself as a newborn, as a toddler, on her first day of school, with her first tooth, with none of her front teeth, winning medals in soccer and track, on her graduation, on her prom night and many times with her parents and with Patty. She looked up at her mother, her heart full of love.
"Those looked like good times," she said slowly.
"They were. But don't strain trying to remember them. That's not why I showed them to you. I wanted you to know that you were happy many times over in your life and that you still have a lot of happiness to go."
"Thanks. Mom."
Mrs. Warren looked at her daughter, not even trying to stop herself from crying. Jess started crying too, wiping her eyes and nose with the back of her hand.
"Here," said her mother, digging into her purse again, "use a tissue."
"Thanks."
"Oh damn," finally said Mrs. Warren, "I've got to hug you. I can't walk out of here without doing that much for you."
"Okay."
For such a small woman, her mother sure could hug, thought Jess as she was crushed by her mother. She returned the hug, albeit not quite so fiercely.
"I love you."
"I... like you," said Jess much more hesitantly.
When Mrs. Warren stepped back into the hall, she saw something that made her rethink her opinion of Test. He stood further down the hall, talking to a shorter, if being six feet and two inches tall made anyone short, but just as muscular blond man as he hugged a diminutive brunette close to him.
"Who's that Patty?" asked Mrs. Warren, indicating Test and his...friends.
"That's Adam Copeland, a wrestler who goes by the name of Edge, and Test's fiancée, Stephanie McMahon."
"I see."
Mrs. Warren didn't like what she saw and she started to think that maybe, just maybe, her husband was right about Test.
Test felt the Warrens and Patty's stares on his broad back as he turned around, a smile on his face. The cold look in Mr. Warren's eyes didn't surprise him, but the chilly glares of Mrs. Warren's and Patty's stopped him cold. But he swallowed his fear.
"Mr. and Mrs. Warren, I'd like to introduce my friend, Adam Copeland."
"Sir, Ma'am, I'm sorry about what happened. Hopefully, your daughter's rapist will be found quickly and prosecuted."
"Yes," hissed out Mr. Warren, his eyes boring holes into Test's skull, "hopefully."
"And this is Stephanie McMahon, my..."
"Fiancée," said Mrs. Warren, "yes, we know."
"Oh no," said Stephanie with a small smile, "that's only on TV. Test and I are good friends but that's all."
"Really?"
Adam couldn't hold back his smile as the looks on Patty's face and on Mrs. Warren's immediately softened. He slapped his friend on the back and grinned from ear to ear.
"I've got good news for you buddy," he said.
"I could use some good news right about now," sighed Test.
"You're off the hook," said Stephanie, smiling up at him.
"What?"
Everyone said that one word at the same time, most of them happy, one with a suspicious look in his eyes.
"Well, last year," said Edge, "someone had a lot of fun vandalizing some of the private changing rooms at the Molson Center. Turned out to be a disgruntled employee."
How was he caught?"
"Well," said Stephanie, "the Molson Center had state-of-the-art cameras installed in all the private changing rooms. Videotapes go straight to the security offices. Detectives Charpentier and Steinberg looked them
over and you were exonerated. You were accounted for from four in the afternoon all the way to eight o'clock last night."
"And that last hour?"
"Remember the little coffee shop where you were waiting?"
"Yeah?"
"The waitresses aren't going to forget about you any time soon. So you can leave Montreal with us later this afternoon."
Test suddenly felt extremely strange. He didn't really want to leave. Not yet, not so soon. He wanted to see this through.
"We'll see about that," he said softly.
Just then, Detectives Charpentier and Steinberg came walking down the corridor.
"Mr. Martin," said Detective Charpentier, eyeing Edge and Stephanie, "I suppose you heard the news."
"Yes. I am happy my part of your investigation is over. Now, you can focus on finding the real rapist."
"We can. That's why we're here."
Without going into anymore detail, the detectives went through the curtain. Jess looked at them warily, a strange feeling coursing through her veins.
"Miss Warren?" asked the first.
"Yes."
"We are Detectives Charpentier and Steinberg of the Montreal Police Department. We have several questions we would like to ask you about tonight's incident."
"Incident? That's a cute way of describing a rape."
"It might not appropriately convey the importance of the crime but it doesn't lessen our intent to find your rapist."
"Good."
"Now, what can you tell us about last night?"
"Nothing."
"Why not?"
"I can't remember anything from last night."
"Nothing?"
"No."
"No what? No, you can't remember?"
"That's right," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, "I can't remember a thing, not a thing. Not who raped me, what he looked like, if I knew him. Not a bloody thing."
"All right. We'll do our very best to find more clues."
"You know about the date-rape drug," she asked.
"Yes. The lab is running tests to find out more about the exact components used."
"What about Test," she asked. "Wasn't he a suspect?"
"Yes, but he's been exonerated."
"Thank God." Jess let out a sigh she'd been holding for the past couple of hours. Ever since she'd found out she'd been raped.
"We'll be staying in touch, Miss Warren, as our investigation continues. Where will we be able to reach you?"
"I don't know. Where do I live?"
The detectives looked at each other, unable to find an answer and politely excused themselves. They asked her parents and Patty for Jess's coordinates and left.
"Patty?" asked Test, "do you think I could see her? Just for a moment?"
"That shouldn't be a problem," said Patty, "just go right in."
"Now wait a damn minute," said Mr. Warren. "There is no way in hell..."
"Gerald," said his wife, cutting him down with her tone and the look in her eyes, "sit down and be quiet."
"But..."
"Be quiet."
Mrs. Warren shot him a warning look and turned to Test with a smile. "Go right in. I'm sure she's waiting for you."
"Thanks."
Mrs. Warren then turned to Stephanie, and like the perfect hostess that she was, invited her to sit down. "Now," she asked, flashing her best smile, "what does a pretty girl like you do in the WWF?"
When Jess looked up at Test, she smiled weakly, and invited him by her side. His fingers tightened on the railing as he brushed his lips against her forehead.
"You've been exonerated," she said softly.
"I have. Although, I got to wonder why anyone would think of me as a rapist."
"I did."
"What?"
"I considered it. I thought you could have raped me."
Test looked into her eyes and saw her honesty there. She had nothing to lose, nothing to hide. And the truth came to her naturally.
"I don't know what to say," he whispered.
"You can be mad, I guess. Who am I to think you're guilty of a crime?"
"You're a rape victim. You're at liberty to believe whatever you want about me. You don't remember anything. You could have thought me to be a rapist."
"I'm so sorry."
"For what? For being smart about not trusting me too soon? Please. I'd rather know that you have your doubts and that you're acting on them before trusting me."
"Good. So now that you're off the hook, what's going to happen with you?"
"With me? Well, I could go back on the road as soon as this afternoon, but I've got some vacation time coming up. I might use it."
"Cool."
"Most of my family is in Ontario, a few hours from here."
"Oh."
"In case I'm being too subtle, I'd like to see more of you. As friends."
"I need friends. I think. So far, I only have Patty. And you."
"Good. You'll make more."
Test turned around, started to go.
"Test!"
"Yeah?"
"I'd like to have a mirror."
"A mirror?"
"Yeah."
"Give me a second."
"Okay."
Test hurried out of the curtains and looked at Patty, Stephanie and Mrs. Warren. "She wants a mirror."
"A mirror?"
"Yeah."
Stephanie and Mrs. Warren pulled compacts out of their purses as quickly as gunslingers cleared their guns out of holsters. Test took Mrs. Warren's compact and went back to the privacy of the curtains.
"There you go."
"Thank you."
Jess looked at the face staring up at her in the small circle. It wasn't an ugly face, from what she could see of it under the bandage. Her eyes were nice, with a slight almond-like shape to them. Her nose and cheeks were rather plain, nothing to say about them, and her lips were nice and full.
"Well," she sighed, "it's okay, I guess."
"What's okay?" asked Test.
"My face. I guess it could be worse."
"It's a beautiful face. And once we get you smiling again, it'll be stunning."
"Thank you."
It was six whole days later... Jess was tired... not physically. Physically, except for the whole rape-amnesia thing, she was fine. But she was exhausted emotionally. She had met with psychologists, psychiatrists, therapists, counsellors, all of them trying to ease her rape trauma. But the thing was, she didn't remember the rape. She still felt tender between her legs, but she didn't remember being raped. Jess had even attended a few discussion groups with other women who had been raped and although she felt fury at the thought of someone violating her, she didn't have so many of their fears.
Everything was different for her. She didn't remember a thing.
Now, Jess sat on a chair in her private room, waiting for her friends, Patty and Test. They were going to drive her home. Actually, they were driving her to her parents' home in St-Bruno. Mom and Father had insisted that she spent at least a week at their house. Jess didn't have much of a problem with it. Maybe being in her childhood home would trigger her memory. A nurse came in with Dr. Green, carrying all sorts of forms.
"Well Jess?" asked Anya, "as soon as your friends get here, you get to get out of here. How does that feel?"
"No offense to you Doc, but it feels damn good."
"Good. I just have a few forms for you to sign."
"A few?" asked Jess, raising her eyebrow à la Rocky Maiva.
"All right, a lot. Let's get started right now. We might be done in a few hours."
Jess looked over the forms and signed them. Before doctor Green took them away, she grabbed her arm.
"How do I know that this is my real signature?"
"Why don't you check your wallet?"
Jess smiled, picked up her purse and checked her wallet. She compared her new signature with the one of the back of her bank card and found them to be identical.
"How is it that I forget everything about my life, right down to my name but that I know exactly how to sign my name?"
"Well, your signature is something that becomes innate to you. As time goes by, you will see that you rarely think about how you sign your name, you just do it. It's a reflex, and amnesia rarely makes you forget those reflexes."
"I see."
By the time Test and Patty arrived, Jess was pretty much bouncing off the walls.
"God," she sighed, "where were you guys? I've been waiting for ages."
"Ages? Come on Jess," said Patty with a slight smile, "we called you an hour ago to tell you we'd be there at ten. It's ten oh five."
"Still. It felt like forever. I'm sorry," said Jess after a few moments, "I just couldn't wait to get out of here."
"Cool. Now, let's get you out of here."
Test picked up her bags and Patty helped Jess in the wheelchair. An orderly pushed the chair down halls and elevators until they reached the front door.
Jess got up and looked outside. She took a deep breath. "It's my first time outside," she said slowly. "I don't remember going outside. Ever."
"Well," said Patty, "hold my hand."
"Thanks."
Jess took Patty's hand, held on to the shoulder strap of her purse and stepped outside. The fresh breeze that welcomed her was cold and caught in her throat. Outside smelled different, cleaner, lighter... and it tasted different too, not as medicinal. The sun warmed her face quickly and Jess looked up at it through her eyelids, amazed at how the ball of fire shone through her skin as a great red ball.
"Are you okay?" asked Test.
"I'm fine. Let's go."
Patty led them to her car, which was parked a few streets away. On the way, Jess drank in the sights, the cars speeding by her, people walking by just as quickly, barely aware of their surroundings. Finally, they got to the car, one of the new Beetles, this one in Black. Test loaded everything into the trunk and squeezed himself into the back, along with them.
"Are you okay?" asked Jess, settling into the front seat.
"Yeah."
"Are you sure?"
"Well, it all depends on how long this takes us. Patty?"
"Shouldn't be more than half an hour. Hopefully, traffic will be good."
Traffic was pretty good. And they made it to the Warrens' home in twenty-five minutes flat. Along the way, Jess rediscovered the sights of her childhood, sights she had forgotten. When they drove past La Ronde, a big, and wonderful amusement park set on an island, Jess begged Patty to stop so she could see it more closely, and only Test's complaints about how he couldn't feel his legs anymore saved them from the unnecessary detour.
At the Warren home, Mrs. Warren fussed over Jess's childhood bedroom, trying to make it look just right for her daughter. She had worked on it all last night, taking away all the ruffles and bows that made it look like a child's room and had added a few, actually a dozen, colored cushions of all sizes all over the room, making it more comfortable and
more adult. When the Beetle pulled into the driveway, Jess took a few moments to get out of the car. She looked around the neighborhood, at the neatly manicured lawns, at the nice cars and the large, stately homes and her heart beat a little faster. As hard as she tried, it was all new to her. None of it seemed familiar. Except for the two people standing by her door.
"Mom, Father."
"Hi darling," said her mother, wrapping her in a hug. "It's so good to have you home again."
"Only for a week though," said Jess, returning her mother's hug. "Next week, I go back to my apartment. With Patty."
"Yes. Of course," said her mother.
"Well, we'll see about that," said her father, giving her a bear hug.
"No Father," said Jess, pulling out of the embrace and looking him straight in the eyes, "we won't. I'm moving back into my apartment next Saturday. This is only for a week, my staying here."
"You might change your mind," he said on a condescending tone.
"And I could get back into that car and drive straight to my apartment."
During this battle of strong wills, Patty, Test and Mrs. Warren stood off to the side, letting father and daughter settle this latest argument. Mrs. Warren and Patty couldn't help it smile. Before last week, Jess would have cowed under her father's strong will. But now, she didn't have any history with him and she stood her ground and refused to let him win any argument.
"Fine," finally said her father.
"Good, now let's see this house."
Mrs. Warren gladly wrapped her arms around her daughter's shoulders and Patty's and led them toward the house. Mr. Warren and Test stood by the car, engaged in a war of wills of their own.
"I didn't expect to see you here."
"Well, I'm leaving for Chicago tomorrow morning and Jess insisted I spend today with her."
"Then I suppose we won't see anymore of you after today?"
"Actually, you'll be seeing a lot of me. I'm taking a month off working on the road and I'll be flying out for three days a week for some shoots, no more, no less. Which means I'll be in Montreal quite a lot for the next month."
"Why?"
"Because I like Jess. She's a friend, she's going through a hard time and I want to be there for her."
"And once that month's over with?"
"Then I'll find a way to keep in touch, don't worry about it."
"Not if I can stop it."
Test and Mr. Warren stared each other down for a few moments, but gave up when they both realised that the other was willing to make this last.
Mrs. Warren toured the house with her daughter for a good thirty minutes, trying to jog her memory. She was about to take her outside when Test joined them.
"I'm sorry to interrupt," he said "but I promised something to Jess and I don't want to renege on my promise."
"What is it?" asked Jess.
"You'll see."
Test led her back to the living room where Patty was just turning on the TV. The familiar, yet new to Jess, theme of the Bugs Bunny show filled the room.
"Bugs Bunny," she said slowly, "yes, you promised me that you would watch it with me for the first time."
"And I am making good on that promise."
For the five minutes of the show, Jess was completely drawn into the show from her chair. She laughed and giggled at the bunny's antics, its wild plans until the first commercial.
"That was wonderful," she sighed with a huge smile. "Thank you."
"No problem," said Test, blushing down to his roots. "Now, wait until you see Tweety Bird."
For the following half hour, Jess lived and breathed Bugs Bunny and enjoyed it all. When the final credits rolled on the screen, she turned to Test, tears in her eyes.
"I might not remember watching this in the past, but I'll remember my first time forever."
Before Test could say anything else, Jess leaned over him and pressed her lips against his.
Jess pulled away from Test as quickly as she kissed him. She looked deep into his eyes and straightened, licking her lips. Test watched her do that and got aroused... and the worst part was, Jess didn't seem to be aware of her own sensuality as she stood in front of him, her hips clad in a tight pair of jeans and a tight-fitting sweater.
"I'll be right back," she said quickly, scurrying out of the living room.
Jess met up with Patty in the hallway, heading to the living room, grabbed her hand and headed in the other direction. After thirty seconds, Jess looked around, turned to her friend with a puzzled look on her face.
"Where's my bedroom again?"
"Follow me."
Patty led her to her bedroom and Jess closed the door behind them, leaning against it.
"What does it feel like to kiss someone?"
"Why?"
"Just tell me, okay?"
"It depends, when you kiss the right person, it feels good... really good."
"Do you feel all funny inside?"
"Oh hell yeah."
Jess slumped against the door until she was sitting on the floor. She buried her face in her hands and let out a nervous giggle.
"I kissed him."
"Test, huh? Figures."
"Figures? What does that mean?"
"The two of you have been making googoo eyes at each other for the past week," said Patty, "it's about time you did something about it."
"Googoo eyes?"
"Yeah. You like him, don't you?"
"I don't know. I don't remember liking anyone before him."
"You don't? Wait a second."
Patty went to Jess's dresser and opened the top drawer. She slid her hand under the top and felt around. There was the ripping sound of velcro and Patty came out with a little red book.
"This was your diary in high school."
"Really?"
"Really, now, let me see here."
"Wait a second," said Jess, joining Patty on the bed as her friend flipped through the diary, "how did you know where to find it, or what was in it?"
"You showed me. Hell, it was a good hiding place. Mine is still in the same place."
"No?"
"Yeah. Every weekend, we would sleep at each other's house and we would read each other's diaries."
"Why?"
"I guess it's because even though we were, and hopefully still are, best friends, there were things that we couldn't quite manage to say to each other. Reading our diaries was less... intimidating?"
"Aww... well, I guess I'll have to read mine... my diary that is."
"That's a great idea... you'll have a better idea of what kind of a teenager you were. What kind of friendship we had--"
"Jess, Patty?"
It was Mrs. Warren's voice.
"We're in here Mom," said Jess.
"Well, what are the two of you doing in here? Poor Test is sitting out here in the living room putting up with your father all by himself."
"Oh..."
"What happened," she asked.
Jess giggled and Patty gestured Mrs. Warren inside the room.
"Well," said Patty with a conspiratorial look to Jess, "Jess kissed Test."
Mrs. Warren's face fell as she sat by her daughter's side on the bed, looking concerned.
"Now, why would you do something like that?"
"I don't know. I didn't think. I just wanted to thank him for watching "Bugs Bunny" with me for the very first time. I was standing in front of him and I just did it. Why Mom?"
"I don't know honey. It's been less than a week and it's so early for this to happen... are you sure you're ready?"
"Mom, I don't remember being raped and now that I know for sure that Test didn't do it... I mean... I don't know...maybe I want to built a future with him, maybe I don't... but I think for now I just want to be his friend."
"Why don't you settle on being his friend for now? Don't rush into anything."
"I know Mom. I agree. It's just that I kissed him, and I felt all funny inside."
Mrs. Warren would never admit to it, but she was terrified for her daughter. There was no telling when Jess would remember her past life and who had raped her. It would traumatize her dreadfully when she did and whatever she might succeed in building with Test might be destroyed by her memories. Protective mother that she was, Mrs. Warren, Irene, wanted to protect with everything that she had. She didn't want anything hurting her baby, anything or anyone. But she knew that she had to give her room, a lot of room. This Jess wasn't her baby anymore. She was a stranger, a stranger who looked and sounded very much like her daughter, but a stranger nonetheless.
"All right, I trust you... you make your own decision."
"I will."
The rest of the day was spent with Jess bombarding her parents and Patty with questions about her life. Test and her were learning about who she was at the same time, Jess finding herself to be a rather smart and impulsive young woman who had goals and set herself about accomplishing them. As for Test, all he heard about Jess confirmed all the good things he thought about her. At around four o'clock, Patty perked up and smiled at him.
"Come on Jess, there's something on TV you just have to see."
Patty turned on the TV to TSN where "WWF: Raw is WAR" was showing as a repeat. Test's face blanched as he realised what episode it was. Jess started watching the show with eyes open wide and slowly got into it, asking all sorts of questions.
Then came the moment Test had been dreading. Shane McMahon and his Mean Street Posse were in the ring, ridiculing Test and Stephanie McMahon's "engagement" when they were interrupted by a GTV segment. It showed Test in beautiful black tux with Brisco and Patterson standing by him, in similar attire. The wedding march started and Stephanie appeared, in a pristine white gown, being walked down the aisle behind her mother, who was being escorted by Ken Shamrock. Stephanie herself was being walked down the aisle by the McMahon clan's arch enemy Stone Cold Steve Austin.
With a deep, sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, Jess watched and listened as Test and Stephanie McMahon got married. Shane and the Mean Street Posse's indignation as they watched the ceremony could not even come close to what Jess was feeling. Or to what Test was feeling. He knew that everyone in the room knew that the marriage was fake, except for Jess. And from the look on her face, she wasn't too happy about what she was seeing.
"Jess," he started to explain. "this is..."
"Not something I want to talk about with you," she spit out, her eyes full of venom as she walked out of the living room and out of the house.
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