Katia sat in front of her computer, her fingers flying across the keyboard as the next plot twist featuring two of her favorite characters, Lissy and Paul, came to life. As she struggled to find the right words, she looked up just in time to see a fancy car roll up to Shane's house. The McMahon clan had arrived, she thought with a smile.
Kat got up from her desk and went to the window. She watched as Vince got out and opened the door for Linda. Stephanie got out on her own and the three of them stood in front of her house, looking at it. From the protection of her house, the young woman saw Shane run out to greet his family and usher them inside.
Sitting back in front of her PC, Katia went on typing, chuckling to herself. Shane was in hot water.
"Mom, Dad, Steph, I wasn't expecting you guys."
"But Paul and Joanie called ahead to tell you we were coming," said Vince, raising an eyebrow à la Rock.
"Actually, we drove down," said Joanie from the top of the staircase.
"Someone's always out there trying to protect you, right Bro?" snickered Stephanie.
"I wish I could say this was a surprise," said Vince, "but I won't."
"Nothing ever gets by you, does it boss," said Paul, pecking Linda's cheek.
"Nothing."
"Let's go into the living room," said Shane, sending his friends a grateful look for their timely appearance.
"Well, this is certainly a nice place," whispered Linda, looking around, "not as big as the house your father and I were planning on giving you, but nice. Almost quaint, one could say."
"Thank you Mom."
"It's a very residential neighborhood," said Vince, looking out to the street and at the other houses. "I mean, your house sticks out like a sore thumb."
"Not anymore. The house is over fifteen years old. Everyone's used to it by now."
"I see. Now, what kind of security are you planning on using?"
"Minimal. I mean, there is almost no crime rate in the area. I don't need that much security," said Shane, sitting down on a chair, next to the fireplace.
Paul and Joanie sat on the loveseat on his right, while the rest of the McMahon clan sat on the opposite side of the living room. The battle lines were clearly drawn but with one slight advantage to Shane. This was his house and he was in a position of power. Question was, would he emerge victorious?
"We tried to understand when you moved here son. But when you left our Christmas celebration, for this... woman."
"Her name is Katia Dorsaint," said Shane.
"For Katia," said Linda with a smile, "you tore this family apart. You deliberately taunted our family tradition to be with this woman."
"Because she matters to me, and because she was alone for the holidays. I care about her. And I wanted to spend some of that time with her."
"Fucking Christmas away," said Stephanie with a smile.
"Stephanie!"
"Sorry."
"We would like to meet her this young woman of yours," said Linda, with a nod from Vince.
"I'll see if she's free."
"Hello Shane," said Katia with a smile as she picked up the phone.
"How did you know it was me?"
"Caller ID. Let me guess, your parents would like to meet me."
"At the earliest possible convenience."
"Maybe she could come over for a late lunch," suggested Linda.
"Oh Shane, I so do not want to do this," whispered a suddenly cowardly Katia. "What if they hate me?"
"How could they, when I love you?"
"I love you too, you great big idiot!"
"Good, now, when should I expect you?"
"Around one thirty. And tell Joanie to come to my place in forty-five minutes. Please."
"Why?"
"I have a dinner tonight at my aunt's house, around five o'clock. And I have to buy something to wear for that. And for your family's late lunch."
"Take me instead of Joanie, please," he begged, "let me out of this hell."
"No chance," she joked, "no chance in hell."
When Joanie rang her doorbell at a quarter to twelve, Kat was getting ready and she managed to open the door while hopping on one foot to get her boot on the other one.
"Hey, what's up?"
"Hey Joanie," said Kat, finally getting her boot up, "how do you feel about an in-and-out shopping spree? I'm going to pick up a dress, stockings and shoes, nothing more, nothing less. And we have to be done in one hour. Feel up to the challenge?"
"Always. On one condition though."
"Which is?"
"I get to pick up a dress, stockings and shoes too."
"As long as it doesn't take anymore than one hour."
"It won't."
"Then you got a deal. So," asked Kat, when they were in her car, driving to the mall, "should I be scared?"
"About meeting the McMahons? No. I mean, their bark is much worse than their bite. I mean, right now, they're a bit mad at Paul and at me for coming down here to warn you guys in advance but by the time, I get back, everything will be fine."
"What if I don't meet up to their standards?"
"Never mind their standards. Shane's in love with you. It might take them a while to swallow the fact that the young eagle has left the aerie but they'll soon have no choice."
"Wow! That was very nicely said."
"I did study literature."
"That's true. I saw that in an interview. Spanish literature and you speak French, don't you?"
"Yeah."
"Maybe every once in a while, you and I should speak French to fuck with Shane and Paul's minds."
"Yeah, but my French stinks. I barely use it anymore."
"Want to start using it again?"
Katia's car exploded into laughter and giggles as Joanie tried out her French. The mall was filled with people and they had to park far from the entrance. It was, after all, Boxing Day. But the masses seemed to part whenever Joanie and Katia appeared. With both of them looking so... well so... imposing, tall and strong. Within an hour, they had everything they needed. And they didn't even have to fight for it. Their shopping was done so quickly and efficiently that Kat even had the time to stop off at a bakery and to buy a strawberry cheesecake for the McMahon lunch and a pecan pie for her aunt's dinner.
Katia adjusted the dark red turtleneck dress over her hips and slung the navy polar fleece cape over her shoulders. She grabbed her purse, the cheesecake and opened the front door. She locked it and quickly made her way to Shane's house, a few hundred meters away. When she got to the front door, the young woman took a deep, deep breath and went for the knocker. The brass handle slipped out of her fingers before she could use it and came face to face with Paul.
"Every time I open this door, you've got goodies for me," he chuckled, eyeing the cheesecake.
"Down boy," she laughed, "this is to impress them, not you."
Paul gave her a quick comforting hug and let her into the house. He took her cape and started to lead her into the living room.
"Wait," she said, backing into Paul. "I don't want to do this. I want to go home and hide. I don't want to meet his parents."
"You'll be just fine," he reassured her before giving her a gentle push toward the living room.
Shane and Vince were talking by the fireplace and Joanie and Linda were sitting on the couch, smiling and chatting.
"Look who I just found," announced Paul.
"Hi Katia," said Shane, coming to greet her.
"Hi," she said softly, letting him peck her cheek and sighing in relief the moment he wrapped his arm around her waist.
"Let me introduce you to my parents. This is my mother, Linda McMahon and my father, Vincent Kennedy McMahon. Mom, Dad, this is Katia Dorsaint."
"Mrs. McMahon, Mr. McMahon, it's a pleasure to finally meet you."
"Linda and Vince, please," said Shane's mother. "We came here especially to meet you."
"I don't know what to say."
"Mom, Dad, you're scaring her," said Shane. "At least let her sit down."
Linda made room for Katia on the couch between her and Joanie while Vince sat in the loveseat in front of the couch. Shane remained standing in front of the fireplace and Paul leaned against the wall.
"So tell us about you."
"Well, I live alone. I work. I write. I'm a fan of the WWF, have been for about ten years. I play the piano. uh, I have one sister and both of my parents are alive and."
"That's not what they want to know," said Stephanie, finally making her entrance, "they want to know how long you've been fucking my brother."
"How long have I been fucking your brother?" asked Katia, "well, if it was any of your business, I'd tell you, but since it isn't, I won't."
"Stephanie," said Linda, "I really don't think this is appropriate."
"Maybe not, but you've been dying to know the answer to that question, aren't you?" asked Stephanie.
"No, you know as well as we do that this isn't why we're here. We came to meet Katia, not to insult her."
"Whatever," pouted Stephanie.
"I'd like you to apologize to Katia," said Shane.
"I'm sorry," said Stephanie, barely looking at Katia.
The young Canadian woman sat in shock. She's always thought that her family was slightly dysfunctional, but the McMahons won the prize. They were not a well family. Their soon-to-be thirty-year-old son bought a house away from them, got himself a girlfriend, and they flew down to keep an eye on him. Not to mention their vengeful little daughter who couldn't stand not being the center of attention.
"You guys are fucked," she muttered under her breath.
"Excuse me," said Linda.
"I'm sorry. I was just thinking about my family," said Katia, "it's funny how seeing your family in action made me miss my family."
"Oh, she misses her family," mimicked Stephanie.
"Oh, quit being such a bitch," said Katia. "And by the way, if you're going to be a bitch, take lessons."
Linda and Vince looked at the defeated look on Stephanie's face and smothered a smile.
"I apologize for speaking out of turn," said Katia, "but I couldn't stand her whining anymore."
"It's all right," laughed Vince, "sometimes it take someone who's on the outside looking in to point out our flaws."
"I'm the last person who should be commenting on fucked up families. My whole family tree is dysfunctional."
"Shane, I believe we're ready for lunch," said Linda. "Katia, tell us about your family."
As Katia followed the McMahon clan into the dining room, she realized that whether she lied or not, they would find out about the skeletons in her closet. So she opted on the truth. She just hoped they were ready.
"Now Katia, how does a young lady like you, of. how many years?" asked Vince.
"Twenty-six, as of November 30th."
"Like Jason Reso?" asked Shane.
"Exactly."
"Wow."
"Now, how does a twenty-six year old end up owning a bungalow all by herself?"
"Well, her parents own the bungalow but when Daddy was offered a position in the Haitian government, she ended up with the house."
"Really? Your father is... what exactly?"
"Right now, my father's the Minister of Education in Haiti."
"He must be a very educated man."
"He is. Daddy studied law in Haiti and he was a teacher there too. When they came to Canada in. 1970, I think, he started teaching French as a second language to English-speaking students. He retired, two or three years ago and he was offered the Ministry job last April."
"Very impressive."
"Yeah. Daddy was a wonderful teacher. I run into an old student of his every once in a while. He just got his masters' degree in French Literature from a French university."
"Your father was good," said Joanie, "I would love to meet him."
"If he ever manages to get out of Haiti for a vacation, I'll try to arrange it."
"What about your mother?" asked Linda.
"Well, Mom studied to be a teacher too but when they came here, things didn't quite work out, so instead, she worked as a... I don't know how to say it in English. Joanie, a fonctionnaire?"
"A fonctionnaire? I think that's a civil servant, no?"
"Yes. Thanks. Mom was a civil servant for the Quebec Construction Office for over 20 years."
"And now?"
"Well, she paints quite a lot and. uh, she writes."
"Your mother's a writer?"
"She published a book, about two weeks ago. She's not sure yet if she's going to write another."
"And I believe you said you wrote as well, isn't that right?" asked Vince.
"Yes."
"So it's a genetic trait?"
"One can only hope."
From his seat next to her, Paul nudged Kat in the ribs, encouraging her and reassuring her about how well she was doing.
"Well, Katia doesn't really have to hope. Some of her stories are published on a website and they're very good," said Shane.
"Actually, that's two websites now. I submitted some of my work to another website and the webmistress said yes. I got word on Friday."
"Good for you, honey," he said, squeezing her hand on top of the table.
Vince and Linda watched their son carefully as he interacted with Katia and found themselves speechless. They had never seen him like this before. Their little boy wasn't a little boy anymore. He was a man, a man in love.
"So," asked Katia, turning to the McMahon parents. "Do I come up to scratch?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I know you came here to meet me, to find out more about me, about the woman who's stealing your son away."
"Is that what you thought?"
"Yes. Could I have been wrong?" she asked with a cocky grin.
"No," said Vince after a moment. "You weren't. You're right. We're here to inspect the merchandise. And so far, we have to admit. Shane did fairly well for himself."
"Thank you."
During the rest of the lunch, everything went fairly well, everything except for Stephanie. She spent the whole time sending Katia and Shane nasty looks. She hated her brother's new girlfriend. But if she played her cards right, she wouldn't be her brother's girlfriend for much longer.
"All right," said Katia at around four thirty. "I hate to do this but I have to go. There's a family dinner at my aunt's house and I have to attend. It's tradition and I have to uphold it for the rest of the family."
"Oh. Well, it was lovely meeting you Katia. We hope to see you again really soon," said Linda.
"Me too. This wasn't half as scary as I thought it would be."
"Good. Oh, I just got a great idea," said Linda, "Katia, why don't you come to our New Year's Eve party?"
"Oh, I don't know."
"Did you have plans?"
"Not really."
"It'd be perfect," said Shane with a smile.
"I work all the way until Thursday night."
"That's fine. You can catch a flight to New York on Friday morning."
"Yeah, but I'd have to be home Saturday. I have a big family get-together to get ready for..."
"Well, you only have to get dressed for it."
"Actually, it's at my place. As a matter of fact, I'm going to start cooking tomorrow."
"I'm sure you can catch a flight back to Montreal late Friday night or early Saturday morning."
"I'll think about it."
"Please do."
Katia made her good-byes, shook Stephanie's hand, pecked Vince's cheek and hugged Linda.
"I'll just walk her home," said Shane, steering Katia out of the living room. "I'll be back in a few minutes."
"So how did I do?" asked Katia, as soon as they were out of the house.
"Great."
"Are you sure? They're not bad-mouthing me right now, are they?"
"I promise they're not."
Katia sighed and allowed her body to sag against Shane's as she inserted her key into her front door. The moment he closed the front door, Shane wrapped her into his arms and planted a long kiss on her lips. She brought her arms up to surround his neck and pressed her body against his.
"All day long, I've been dying to kiss you."
"Is that so Mr. McMahon?" she teased, licking his pouty lower lip.
"It is so Ms. Dorsaint. Guess what else I've been dying to do," he said, busily pushing up the hem of her long dress to her hips.
"Let me guess, Mr. Naughty," she giggled, as she helped him slide her tights down her legs.
Fifteen minutes later, Shane and Katia walked out of her house to her car, big grins on their faces. As he watched her drive away, Shane felt happier than he'd ever felt. Love was good.
On December 30th, 1999, after work, Katia hurried out of the building. For the first time in a long time, she'd driven in to work. She had to rush home, change, and wait. Shane had arranged for a driver to drive her from Montreal to Stamford. The driver was supposed to get there at ten o'clock, which meant that she would get to Shane's home at around six in the morning. All the flights from Montreal to the States had been booked solid, not to mention trains and buses. Kat had offered to drive herself but Shane had quickly shot that option down. He wanted this to be relaxing for her, not exhausting.
And relaxing it was. Five minutes after the car passed customs, Katia promptly fell asleep. She woke up once to go to the bathroom and drink a cup of hot chocolate. She woke up just in time for the car's entry into Stamford. She was impressed to say the least. The houses were absolutely stunning. Hell, they weren't even house per se. They were mansions, manors, and they were way too big to qualify as houses.
When the car pulled into the McMahon driveway, Katia held her breath. This was a fucking palace! Her parents' house was probably smaller than the gardener's shed! But before she could dwell on that, Shane came out of the house, a smile brightening his features. As soon as the car came to a stop, he opened the door and pulled Kat out. He kissed her quickly and passionately.
"I missed you," he said with a smile.
"We were together until Tuesday."
"Your point?"
Shane gave her another quick kiss and leaned into the car to give the driver a few instructions.
"We're going to have breakfast," he explained, walking with her to the house, "and then, we're going to go to your hotel, let you sleep a bit and then we're going to spend the day together until we have to get ready for tonight's reception."
"Sounds like a plan to me."
Kat had to remind herself to close her mouth as Shane dragged her to the kitchen. Everything seemed like something right out of a movie. It was all so nice and so grand.
"This is a great house," she whispered into his ear as he opened the kitchen door.
"Thanks. You know I actually worked on it one summer?"
"Yeah, I did."
"How did you."
"The Internet contains a wealth of information on you Shane."
The kitchen was empty except for a woman wearing jeans and a tee shirt.
"Mary," said Shane, "I'd like to introduce you to Katia Dorsaint. Katia, this is Mary, our housekeeper. She's the one who actually manages to keep all of us McMahons in line."
"Pleased to meet you Mary."
"Same here. The whole family has been talking about you. I've been curious."
"Good or bad?"
"All good. Now, the two of you, have a seat and let me get you breakfast."
Breakfast was a quiet affair with Shane and Katia talking quietly while Mary got breakfast ready for the rest of the McMahon clan. As a matter of fact, when Vince and Linda finally made it to the kitchen, they were surprised to find Mary enjoying a cup of coffee at the kitchen counter while Katia did the dishes and Shane dried them.
"Shane, you know how to dry dishes?" teased his father.
"Yes," answered Shane proudly.
"Actually, he broke two plates," said Katia with a smile.
"You gave them to me too quickly."
"You weren't paying attention."
"I so was."
"You were not."
While Vince and Linda ate their breakfast, Shane and Katia talked to them, holding hands under the table. Finally, Linda took Katia to the living room while Shane and Vince headed into the office to talk business.
"So what do you think of our home?" asked Linda.
"It's big. For now, that's all I can say. I've never been in a house so big, except for the White House, but that doesn't count, does it?"
"Well, it is a house. I'm glad you like it. And I do wish you'd agreed to stay here instead of at a hotel."
"It's okay. Maybe next time?"
"Oh definitely next time. You know Katia, my husband and I hired a private investigator to find out more about you."
"You did?" Katia didn't know what to say. Her heart started beating really fast inside of her chest. "And?"
"Well, we were happy to find out that you were pretty much as good as you promised to be."
"I am? I mean, I was?"
"Yes. Don't get me wrong, we didn't investigate you to make sure you were the right kind of woman for Shane, but we investigated you because as Shane's girlfriend, you'll be in the public eye quite a lot. And as such, we have to make sure that everything is okay."
"So you were doing this for my good and Shane's, right?"
"As difficult as that is to believe, yes."
"I don't know why, but that makes sense."
"Good," said Linda with a smile, "because on Sunday, I figured you were the kind of young woman I wanted my son to be involved with. And this report just confirmed my initial instinct."
"So I take it you like me?"
"I like you."
Only fifteen minutes later, Shane came to get Katia to take her to the hotel. And as soon as he saw what his mother and girlfriend were up to, he was grateful for his timing. Linda was just starting to set out the family album.
"Mom, I have to take Katia to her hotel. She needs to rest."
"Give us a few minutes Shane, I just wanted to show her some family pictures."
"Why do you think I want to drag her out of here?"
"It's okay Linda," said Kat with a smile. "Next time?"
"Definitely next time."
The driver followed Shane and Katia to the hotel. As soon as the young woman was checked in, they went up the stairs to her bedroom. Katia was rather impressed by the luxury accommodations and she told Shane he'd spent way too much money. He laughed off her worries about money and started kissing her.
"Let's get busy," he whispered, undoing the buckle of her black leather belt.
"I don't think so," she said, slapping his hands away, "make yourself useful and help me unpack."
"And then we play?"
"Yes."
While Kat busied herself in the bathroom, taking care of her toiletries, she let Shane look after her clothes. After all, there was only her dress for the party and a few pants and sweaters for him to look after. He couldn't mess that up, could he?
He could. Kat was checking out the shower when she heard Shane's loud curse from the bedroom.
"What?" she asked, making her way to him.
"I think I did something bad," he said, holding up her blue ball gown.
"What did you do?"
"I think... well, I kind of broke your perfume bottle on top of your dress."
"How bad."
The question somewhat answered itself as Katia got closer and closer to Shane and the dress. The smell, or now the stench, of Oscar de la Renta's Volupté filled the room.
"Damn, damn, damn," swore Katia as she took the dress from Shane's hands.
"I am so sorry," he said, "I was taking it out of the suitcase and I had the bottle in my hands and."
"Shit," she whispered, not listening to him, "this is bad. Really, really bad."
". The bottle kind slipped out of my hands just as I."
"I don't know if dry cleaners will be able to fix this in time for tonight."
"... Picked up the dress and it fell on the ground, all wrapped up in the dress."
"Shane! I don't give a damn how it happened," finally exploded Katia. "Question is right now, will I be able to fix it?"
Shane made a face and Kat stuck her tongue out at him. She spotted a yellow pages under the bedside table and grabbed it. With Shane not getting a clue as to what she was doing, she looked for the dry cleaners section and grabbed the phone. As soon as he heard her speak, he got it. She was trying to find out if they could get out the stench of perfume
out of a dress.
"Damn, damn, triple damn," muttered Kat as she hung up the phone after calling the third dry cleaners.
"What did they tell you?"
"They can get the smell out but it's a long process that takes about a week or so, depending on the various oils used in the making of the perfume."
"Shit!"
"Oh hell yeah. What am I going to do for tonight? I have nothing to wear."
"Why don't you go buy something?"
"Me? It's not like I have the money."
"Well, it was kind of my fault."
"There is that. But how can I find a whole outfit for a fancy shindig in one day?"
"Well, we have access to one of the best shopaholics in the world."
"Joanie! Can she help me?"
"Sure. And with my money, we'll make you look like a million bucks. Now, question is: are you game?"
"Oh, I'm game baby!"
The second Shane and Kat spelled the problem out to Joanie, she spun into action.
"All right," she said, checking her watch as Paul handed her the pen and paper she'd snapped her fingers for, "we are looking at a hard target search. We need a gown that is suitable for tonight, matching accessories. Kat, you got a good pair of walking shoes?"
"Yes."
"Good. It's nine fifteen now. Most of the stores we'll need don't open until ten. I'll have my hairdresser and make-up people schedule you in along with me."
"Oh, I can do my own hair," said Katia with a smile, "it's not that complicated."
"Honey, why do it yourself when your boyfriend can pay for someone to do it for you?"
"Do you know if they can do Black hair?"
"Of course they can. And if they can't, they'll bring someone in to do it. Now, Paul, while we're out, can you call the spa downstairs and book Kat in for a massage?"
"Joanie, come on, you're going overboard." whispered Kat.
"Darling," said Joanie, sitting next to her, "if the Boy Wonder hadn't dropped that bottle of perfume on your dress, you would have the whole day to relax, right?"
"Right."
"Now, since you and I have to go shopping for everything, don't you agree that you need the extra relaxation?"
Katia felt unsure. Everything Joanie had planned seemed so extravagant, so overboard. She'd heard of people going the extra mile when it came to personal comfort and luxury. She read about it magazines. But to do it herself was. well, it was tempting.
"Okay," she finally agreed.
"Good," said Joanie, turning to Shane, "now let's see those gold cards."
"But I thought I might come along with you," stuttered Shane. "You know, spend some time with you?"
Katia and Joanie turned around and looked at Shane has if two antennas had sprouted from his skull. He sunk down into the couch and started to nibble on his nails.
"Shane, my man," said Paul as Katia and Joanie conferred in hushed tones, "you should know by now, never interfere with women's shopping. It's dangerous."
"I can't believe we walked out of there with his gold Amex and his platinum Visa," said Katia as Joanie pulled her car in front of an expensive-looking boutique.
"Kat darling, you have to realize that for men as rich as Shane, guilt is a powerful thing."
"I feel bad about using him that way."
"Who ruined your dress?" asked Joanie, opening the door to the boutique.
"He did."
"So why feel bad? It's payback, that's all."
Just then, a saleswoman approached us with a smile. Joanie and Kat explained the situation to her and her smile got wider. When they told her that Katia was going to accompany Shane McMahon at his family's Year End gala, her blue eyes turned into dollar signs.
"Well Ms. Dorsaint," she said, drawing me to the back of the store, "let's see what we can do for you. I'm sure we'll find something suitable."
Did she ever. It was eleven in the morning and Katia and Joanie stood in front of a rack full of gowns. The younger woman had tried out all of them and she was trying to figure out which one to pick. There was a dark blue one that looked a lot like the dress Shane had ruined. And there was an icy pink one that Joanie adored. And there was a two piece
dress they both loved.
"So what do we do?" asked Kat.
"I don't know. All three look fantastic. Personally, I'm torn between the pink and the two piece."
"And I love the two piece. But I'm also partial to the blue."
"Ladies," said the saleswoman, "I just got off the phone with the manager of the shoe store a few doors down. He's bringing over some pair of shoes. You did say you were a size eleven?"
"Yes," murmured Katia in shame.
"Size eleven," chuckled Joanie. "Honey, those aren't feet, they're skis!"
"Oh, that's the first time I heard that one."
"Sorry. But that's big."
"And if I were a guy, I'd be hung all the way down to my knees."
Katia sat down next to Joanie as the saleswoman displayed the three favored dresses on wooden mannequins. As the two women went over the advantages of each dress, the shoe guy arrived. Kat patiently tried on each dress with every pair of shoes. Finally, she changed back into her day clothes and went to sit next to Joanie.
"So," she asked her friend, "what do we do?"
"Well, the choice seems pretty clear."
"Yeah, to me too. Do you think Shane will like it?"
"Darling Katia, you have got to learn: his opinion is cute. But it never, ever, matters."
At the spa, Katia was pampered until she thought her eyes would bug right out of her head. She got a pedicure, a manicure, a facial and a massage, not to mention that they relaxed her hair. By the time she caught up with Joanie at four o'clock at the spa entrance, Kat felt more relaxed than she had in ages.
"Let me guess," grinned Joanie, "you enjoyed?"
"That was. good."
"Better than sex."
". I don't know. I got have sex with Shane again to confirm or deny."
"I know, me too. Listen, I'll bring my stuff over to your room and that way, the hairdresser and make-up people will only have to make one stop."
"That's a great idea."
Joanie and Kat found Paul and Shane in Joanie's suite watching a football game while they chewed on some yogurt-covered pretzels. Both women were caring garment bags and shoeboxes and Joanie had her toiletries tucked under her arm.
"All right boys," she said, "out of here."
"What? What's going on?" asked Shane.
"Joanie and I have to get ready for tonight."
"And?"
"We figured it would be easier to have to the hairdresser and make-up people come to one room and do us both instead of having to go from one room to the next."
"But... but..."
Both Paul and Shane looked at if someone had pulled the rug out from under their feet.
"Kat, I thought you and I might have some." started Shane.
"And Joanie, you promised that."
"Well, Paul, if Shane hadn't dropped that bottle on Katia's gown, we would have had plenty of time to do what I promised you we'd do."
"And Shane, if you hadn't dropped that bottle."
"I get it Katia, don't rub it in."
"Not even time for a quickie?" asked Paul.
"No can do. We have to be ready for five thirty when the limo comes to pick us up. We have to get started now."
Grumbling and shuffling their feet, Paul and Shane started to make their way out of the room. Joanie kicked the door shut after them and pushed Katia towards the bathroom.
"Come on, you shower first. The hairdresser's going to be here in fifteen minutes and she'll want to start with you."
"Cool."
In the other suite, Paul and Shane plopped down in front of the TV. Shane reached for the remote control but Paul quickly snapped his fingers for it.
"Why should you get the remote?"
"Because, Mr. McMahon Jr., if it weren't for you being a klutz, Joanie and I would be enjoying some together time right now."
"The bottle slipped!"
"You're an idiot!"
"You're a putz!"
Paul started to flip through the channels while Shane sat next to him, pouting. After five minutes of silence, Shane spoke up again.
"I didn't do it on purpose, you know."
"Do. You. Think. I. Care?"
"Paul, come on."
"I'm serious Shane. I'm currently mad at you."
"Argh! You're a wuss anyways."
"Wuss? I'm a wuss?"
The two men started wrestling in the living room and Shane was actually coming out on top when Joanie walked into the room. She pinned them with a glance and walked to the dresser.
"I forgot my stockings," she said with a smile. "You boys go on. You seem to be enjoying it."
Paul and Shane got up and shook imaginary dirt off their clothes as Joanie got the stockings.
"So, how are things going in there?" asked Shane.
"Fairly well. Hairdresser just got there."
"So when will you be ready?"
"In time. Gotta run."
As the door slammed shut behind Joanie, Paul looked at Shane, at a loss for words.
"So, how long do you think it'll take us to get ready?" he asked the younger man.
"Fifteen minutes, I guess."
"So, you want me to kick your ass again?"
"As if you could!"
And the two idiots were at it again.
Fifteen minutes before picking up Katia and Joanie, Shane and Paul stopped wrestling and started getting ready. Since Paul called the bathroom first, Shane started laying out his tux on the bed, putting everything within easy reach, from his cufflinks to his socks, not to mention his bow tie. Five minutes later, Paul came out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a towel.
"You're up next Shane-O."
By the time Shane came back into the room, he realized all of his hard work had been for naught. Paul's things were piled on top of his and he got back to the room just in time to stop his friend from stepping on the cufflinks his mother had given him two years ago on Christmas.
"Paul, watch it!"
"What?"
"The cufflinks... on the floor?"
"Ooops!"
"How could you mess everything up within five minutes? It's a wonder Joanie put up with your crap."
"Shane, you set everything down on the bed as if someone was going to ask you if anything was missing."
"That's the best way to go, trust me."
And Paul should have trusted Shane. That's what he kept on repeating to himself when they were five minutes late for picking up the girls. He was down on his knees, looking for a cufflink under the bed.
"You could help, Shane-O."
"I. Don't. Think. So."
"Don't be such a bitch!"
"Fine."
Shane went down on his knees in front of the couch and saw the cufflink shining at him from under the bedside table.
"Bedside table," he called, "on the left side of the bed."
"Great. Thanks. Let's go before Joanie and Katia decide we're not worth living."
In Katia's suite, Joanie and Kat were putting the finishing touches on each other. They'd just sent the make-up artist on her way and were patiently waiting for their guys, pacing around the living room.
"I'll bet you a thousand to one that Paul's down on his knees right now, either looking for a cufflink or the invitations to tonight's reception."
"No such worries about Shane. The man's slightly anal when it comes to getting ready."
"Do you think some of that can rub off on Paul? I swear that man is going to be disorganized at his own funeral," sighed Joanie, quickly knocking on the oak coffee table.
"Come on. He can't be that bad."
"He's not. I just hate it when he makes me wait, that's all."
They didn't wait for long. There was a knock at the door and both women shouted together.
"In a minute!"
Quickly, they grabbed their long black cloaks and threw them over their shoulders. Both of them adjusted the cloaks' hoods over their hair and made sure their dresses didn't show and Kat finally opened the door.
"Wow," she whispered, "the two of you really clean up nicely."
"Thanks... and the two of you... well, we can't really tell, can we?" said Paul.
"And that's the way we're keeping it," said Joanie, quickly kissing Paul on the lips.
"Come on, just a little peek?" asked Shane, trying to sneak his hands under Kat's cloak.
"Not even," she laughed, slapping his hands away.
"Please."
"If I kiss you," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck, "will you let up on this?"
"Only if it's a French kiss with a lot of tongue!"
"Minimal tongue. I don't want to ruin my lipstick."
"If your lipstick more important than I am?"
"Right now, you don't want me to answer that."
Kat quickly kissed Shane, giving him minimal tongue.
"Two of you done yet?" asked Paul, getting a similarly unsatisfying kiss from Joanie. "We can't be late for your folks' shindig."
On the ride to the reception hall, Shane and Paul tried to convince their girlfriend and fiancée to show them their dresses but the ladies would have none of it. Finally, they got to the reception hall. They quickly made their way inside where quite a few of the WWF talent was waiting for the ballroom doors to open. There was, as of yet, no sign of
Shane's parents.
"Let's go to the bathroom," said Joanie, tugging on Kat's hand.
"What? Come on," whined Shane, "how much longer do we have to wait?"
"Until we come back," said Kat over her shoulder as Joanie pulled her away. "I promise."
In the bathroom, Joanie sat on one of the plush red velvet couch and looked up at Kat.
"What? I thought you had to go to the bathroom?"
"Kat, with that dress, you need to build up anticipation."
They both waited around the bathroom for another five minutes and Joanie finally took Katia back to the lobby. As Kat finally spotted Shane and Paul, she smiled. They both looked great. Shane in a tuxedo was a dream made true. Paul looked great in his own bad-boy-made-good-for-just-one-night kind of way. But Shane... the man looked like he was born to wear a tuxedo. Whereas Paul kept on pulling on his tuxedo as if he couldn't wait to take the damn thing off, Shane looked as comfortable in his tux as Paul in a pair of beat-up jeans and a DX tee shirt.
"So, are you ladies finally ready to show off your dresses?" asked Shane.
"Yes," whispered Kat breathlessly.
In a strangely perfect choreography, Paul and Shane moved behind Joanie and Katia and undid the clasp around the women's neck. As the breeze from the hall's air conditioning drifted over her skin, goosebumps rose all over Katia's arms shoulders. Slowly, she pivoted on her heels to look at Shane and to see the look on his face.
"So," she asked shakily. "How do I look?"
For one of the very few times in his life, Shane Brandon McMahon was at a loss for words. Katia's gown was made of one of those strange fabrics that changed colors with the light. As he looked at it, he saw flashes of green, blue and lilac, all at once. The long skirt hung from her hips all the way down to the tips of her shoes, which, as it so happened, were a perfect match for the fabric of her dress. The bodice was a tight tube that showed off her bosom and her strong arms. Her hair was done up in a coronet of braids which made her look all the more regal. The simple silver chain and bracelet he'd given her for Christmas completed the outfit.
"Shane?" she asked, "are you with me? How do I look?"
"Katia," he whispered, stretching her arms out to the side and looking at her, "you look..."
"... Canadian," said a mocking voice from behind Katia.
The young woman turned around and saw the blond heads of the Canadian Mafia.
"Hi boys," she smiled. "I'm so glad you're here. I need as many familiar faces as possible."
"Well, honey, with you looking as good as you do right now, we can guarantee you that most of the guys here tonight will want to get familiar with you," said Adam, going for a quick peck on the cheek.
"Not so fast Copeland," said Shane, pulling Kat out of the way, "you don't want to ruin her make-up, now do you?"
"Shane," giggled Kat at him, "since when do you care?"
"Since he said you looked. Canadian."
"Shane, I am Canadian."
"Yeah, well, that's for me to say. Guys, I see my parents. Katia and I have to go say hello."
Before anyone else could say anything else, Shane was dragging his girlfriend away.
"So," she whispered as he whisked her through the throng of people, "you never did tell me what you thought of my dress?"
"I think it's..."
"Shane, Katia," said Linda, turning around to greet them, "the two of you look wonderful."
"Thank you," blushed Kat. "You look very nice too, Mrs. McMahon."
"How many times do I have to tell you Katia. It's Linda to you."
"I'm sorry. It's just that in this environment, it just seems right to call you Mrs. McMahon."
"Well don't. If it were up to me, we'd be having a barbecue at Steve's ranch in Texas but Vince wouldn't hear anything of it."
"Katia, Shane," finally said Vince, "good to see you."
"Thank you Vince. It's nice to be here. From the looks of it, it looks like it's going to be a wonderful evening."
"It'd better be. After all the time and money."
"If you'll excuse us," said Linda, "there's some people Vince and Shane just have to see."
And Katia was left standing there on her own, with nothing to do except fiddle with her purse. However, Joanie soon appeared at her side.
"Don't panic. I'm the cavalry."
"Good. I thought I was."
"Holy shit!" swore Joanie.
"What?"
"Trouble. Guess who Steph's date is?"
"Who?" asked Katia, seeing Stephanie with a beautiful brunette woman.
"Shane's ex, Marissa Mazzola."
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